Nuts to
Nuts to crack; or Quips, quirks, anecdote and facete of Oxford and Cambridge Scholars
作者：Gooch, Richard, 1791-1849
体例：题 章数：414
字数：347,741 来源：Project Gutenberg
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章节目录
共 414 题- OF
- PREFACE.
- CONTENTS.
- OXFORD AND CAMBRIDGE
- NUTS TO CRACK;
- OR,
- QUIPS, QUIRKS, ANECDOTE AND FACETE.
- WAS OXFORD OR CAMBRIDGE FIRST FOUNDED?
- JEU DE POESIE.
- THE PRECEDENCE OF OXFORD AND CAMBRIDGE.
- THIS CELEBRATED CONTROVERSY
- DIED OF LITERARY MORTIFICATION,
- SIR SIMON D'EWES,
- GONE TO JERUSALEM.
- A CUTTING RETORT
- LIBERTY A PLANT.
- A TAILOR BEING TAKEN BY SURPRISE,
- REASONS FOR NOT PUBLISHING.
- DECLINING KING GEORGE.
- Another of "honest Vere's"
- CLASSICAL JEU D'ESPRIT
- A TRAIT OF BARROW.
- INVETERATE SMOKERS.
- LOVER OF TOBACCO,
- A WAGER,
- GAME IN EVERY BUSH.
- NEWTON'S TOAST.
- THE PIETY OF RAY,
- THE DEVIL LOOKING OVER LINCOLN.
- RADCLIFFE'S LIBRARY.
- TRAITS OF DR. BATHURST'S WIT AND HABITS.
- HE FREQUENTLY CARRIED A WHIP IN HIS HAND,
- WHIPPED EVEN TO THE TWENTIETH YEAR.
- BE A SMART FELLOW,
- MILTON WAS BELASHED
- The following celebrated
- EPIGRAM ON AN EPIGRAM,
- TELL US WHAT YOU CAN'T DO?
- THE FIRST WOMEN INTRODUCED INTO A CLOISTER.
- THE CAMBRIDGE SCHOLAR AND THE GHOST OF A SCRAG OF MUTTON.
- COMPARISONS ARE ODIOUS.
- JAUNT DOWN A PATIENT'S THROAT.
- THIS DIFFERENCE OF OPINION
- AN EPIGRAM ON A PETIT-MAITRE PHYSICIAN.
- PORSON,
- He was once
- BOASTING AT A CAMBRIDGE PARTY,
- BISHOP HEBER'S COLLEGE PUNS.
- A WORTHY OF THE SAME SCHOOL,
- KEEP HIS DOOR SPORTED FOR A WEEK,
- PLUCKED AT THEIR DIVINITY EXAMINATION,
- COMPLIMENT TO THE MEN OF EXETER COLLEGE, OXON.
- And writing of this society reminds me that
- HIS GRACE OF WELLINGTON
- ANOTHER OXONIAN WAS POSED,
- LAPSUS GRAMMATICÆ
- THAT THE LATIN TONGUE BE USED,
- EFFECT OF HABIT.
- THE CONCUSSION.
- SIR, DOMINUS, MAGISTRI, SIR GREENE.
- HUSBANDS MAY BEAT THEIR WIVES.
- ANOTHER ATTACK ON THE LADIES
- EXTRAORDINARY DOINGS AT MERTON.
- DIGGING YOUR GRAVES WITH YOUR TEETH.
- DR. TORKINGTON'S GRATITUDE TO HIS HORSE.
- SAY JOHN SHARP IS A ROGUE.
- I NOW LEAVE YOU TO MAKE AS MUCH NOISE AS YOU PLEASE.
- THE MAD PETER-HOUSE POET.
- He afterwards added this exquisite effusion:--
- THE GRACE CUP OF PEMBROKE-HALL, CAMBRIDGE.
- This is not unlike
- THE TERTIAVIT
- A MORE CAPACIOUS BOWL
- HORN OF DIVERSION,
- ANOTHER BIBULOUS RELIQUE
- A LAUDABLE AND CHRISTIAN CUSTOM,
- THEIR FEAST DAYS,
- A MUSICAL MAY-DAY COMMEMORATION,
- ODE ON A COLLEGE FEAST DAY.
- I.
- II.
- III.
- IV.
- SIR ROBERT WALPOLE AT CAMBRIDGE.
- A COLLEGE DINNER AT THE END OF THE SIXTEENTH CENTURY:--
- THE BLACK-NIGHT.
- THE FORCE OF IMAGINATION.
- HIS ABSENT HABITS,
- THE EARLY POETS BRED IN THE HALLS OF GRANTA,
- VERY EASY TO WRITE LIKE A FOOL."
- BOTH THESE ALUMNI,
- CROMWELL'S PEAR-TREE
- OTHER MEMORIALS OF CROMWELL
- DRYDEN CONFINED TO COLLEGE WALLS.
- EXPELLED FROM CAIUS COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.
- PRIOR LAID OUT THE WALKS OF ST. JOHN'S
- STUNG BY A B.
- A NEST OF SAXONISTS.
- COLE, RELATES A PLEASANT MISTAKE,
- MINDING THE ROAST.
- SPECIMEN OF A COLLEGE EXERCISE,
- TULIP-TIME.
- THE COLLEGE BELL.
- COLLEGE FUN.
- THE KING OF DENMARK AT CAMBRIDGE.
- WILLIAM THE FOURTH, ANNOUNCED HIS INTENTION TO VISIT CAMBRIDGE.
- Wood relates, amongst other humorous incidents, that
- DURING QUEEN ELIZABETH'S SECOND VISIT TO OXFORD,
- WHEN QUEEN ELIZABETH FIRST VISITED CAMBRIDGE,
- THE FIRST DISSENTER IN ENGLAND,
- THE FIRST ENGLISH PLAY EXTANT:
- TITLE:
- BRIEF SKETCH OF THE PLOT.
- A NEWE TESTAMENT IN GREEK,
- THE SCHOLARS OF CHRIST CHURCH, OXFORD, INVENTED MOVEABLE SCENES.
- JAMES THE FIRST AND HIS COURT CAME TO OXFORD,
- OXFORD AND CAMBRIDGE SEEMED RIVALS
- EXTRAORDINARY DIVINITY ACT,
- THE FAMOUS CAMBRIDGE LATIN COMEDY,
- TO PLACE THE VICE-CHANCELLOR BEFORE THE MAYOR,
- AN OXONIAN AND A BISHOP,
- A CAROL BRINGING IN THE BORES HEED.
- THIS CUSTOM
- In the Oxford Sausage is the following
- CLEAVING THE BLOCK,
- THE MISFORTUNE OF BEING LITTLE.
- THE FOLLOWING LATIN EPIGRAM:
- IN ENGLISH, AS MUCH AS TO SAY:
- BISHOPS BLOMFIELD AND MONK,
- More than one distinguished judge of his merits
- PRONOUNCED HIM THE GREATEST SCHOLAR IN EUROPE,
- PORSON WAS A GREAT MASTER OF IAMBIC MEASURE,
- PORSON AND WAKEFIELD
- HE OBTAINED THE SOUBRIQUET OF JUDGE BLACKSTONE.
- DR. EDWARD DANIEL CLARKE,
- A BALLOON, WITH WHICH HE AMUSED THE UNIVERSITY,
- THREE BLUE BEANS IN A BLADDER.
- Equal to this is the following spondaic on
- THE THREE UNIVERSITY BEDELS,
- NO SCHOLAR IN EUROPE UNDERSTOOD THEM BETTER.
- BENTLEIAN ANECDOTE
- THE GREAT GAUDY OF THE ALL-SOULS' MALLARD.
- THE ALL-SOULS' MALLARD.
- ANOTHER OXFORD DREAM PRECEDED THE FOUNDATION OF ST. JOHN'S COLLEGE.
- A POINT OF PRECEDENCE SETTLED.
- COMPLIMENTS TO THE LEARNED OF BOTH UNIVERSITIES.
- DOCTOR SUBTILIS;
- Another Mertonian, named Occam, his successor and opponent, was named
- DOCTOR INVINCIBILIS;
- A third was the famous Sir Henry Savile, who had the title of
- PROFOUND
- DOCTOR EVANGELICUS.
- THE WALKING LIBRARY;"
- JOHN LELAND,
- LORD MOUNTJOY
- ATTACK THE ERRORS OF LUTHER.
- VIR EGREGIE DOCTUS,
- A POINT OF ETIQUETTE.
- Wood, in his Annals of Oxford, has the following anecdote of
- THE VALUE OF A SYLLABLE.
- He was also of that
- BAND OF PROFANE SCOFFERS
- DID NOT THE LESS REVERENCE RELIGION,
- THE MEMORY OF JEMMY GORDON,
- SIMILAR STORY IS TOLD OF AN OXFORD WAG,
- CAMBRIDGE FROLICS.
- SWEARING LIKE A COMMON SOLDIER?'
- CASE OF BLACK RASH,
- The same Ralph relates a humorous anecdote of
- THE FATE OF THE DOCTOR'S OLD GRIZZLE WIG.
- TWO OTHER SHOOTING ANECDOTES.
- A PARTY OF OXONIANS,
- BISHOP WATSON'S OWN ACCOUNT OF HIS PROGRESS AT CAMBRIDGE.
- PALEY'S SKETCH OF HIS EARLY ACADEMICAL LIFE.
- THE LOUNGER. BY AN OXONIAN.
- AN OXFORD HOAX AND A PURITAN DETECTED.
- MORE THAN ONE GOOD SAYING
- HORACE WALPOLE A SAINT.
- A CAMBRIDGE CONUNDRUM,
- In his Supplement, on Doctors _Long_, _Short_, and _Askew_:--
- A BISHOP'S INTEREST.
- OXFORD FAMOUS FOR ITS SOPHISTS.
- A VICE-CHANCELLOR'S BEING LACONIC.
- TWO PERT OXONIANS
- CORRUPTED THE LATIN TONGUE
- THE OXONIANS SURPASSED ARISTOTLE
- HE SET ARISTOTLE WITH HIS HEELS UPWARDS ON THE SCHOOL GATES,
- THEY FIRST EXEMPLIFIED THE ART OF CUTTING,
- CROMWELL'S SOLDIERS AT A DISPUTATION AT OXFORD.
- TROOPS BEING RAISED BY THE UNIVERSITY OF OXFORD,
- A COPY OF VERSES ON THE DOCTOR'S DEATH.
- CAPTAIN RAG
- THE THREE DAINTY MORSELS.
- ANSWERED IN KIND.
- POWERS OF DIGESTION.
- A CAMBRIDGE D.D.,
- THE INSIDE PASSENGER.
- PALEY'S CELEBRATED SCHOOL ACT.
- HE WAS NOT FOND OF CLASSICAL STUDIES,
- HE WAS NOT SKILLED IN PROSODY;
- He had
- A SPICE OF CUTTING HUMOUR
- A RULE OF HIS.
- HE WAS UNLIKE DR. PARR.
- HE WAS NEVER A GOOD HORSEMAN.
- HIS TWO OR THREE REASONS FOR EXCHANGING LIVINGS.
- A DISCIPLE OF IZAAK WALTON,
- HIS WAY WHEN HE WANTED TO WRITE.
- A CONTRAST TO DR. GOLDSMITH,
- PALEY'S DIFFICULTIES A USEFUL LESSON TO YOUTH.
- IN HIS POVERTY HE WAS LIKE PARR.
- PORSON, TOO, WAS A CONTRAST TO PALEY.
- ANECDOTE OF THE GREAT LORD BURLEIGH AND THE DISSENTERS OF HIS DAY.
- OTHER SAYINGS OF THIS GREAT MAN
- PORSON'S PROGRESS IN KNOWLEDGE.
- A GENTLEMAN WITHOUT SIXPENCE IN HIS POCKET.
- GREEK PROTESTANTS AT OXFORD.
- JUDGMENT OF ERASMUS ON THE CAMBRIDGE FOLK.
- BEDMAKERS OR GYPS.
- DROPS OF BRANDY.
- THE DIRTY-SHIRT CLUB.
- DESSERT FOR TWENTY.
- A HINT FOR GOWNSMEN.
- MARVELLOUS STRIDES ON THE ROAD TO WEALTH,
- ANOTHER SPECIES OF FRAUD
- THE SOURCE OF DR. PARR'S ELOQUENCE.
- ADDRESS TO HIS TEA-CHEST,
- AS A SPICE OF THEIR JOINT VANITY,
- ASSURING HIMSELF A PLACE AMONGST THE GREEK SCHOLARS OF HIS DAY.
- ANOTHER SPICE OF HIS VANITY
- I STILL MAINTAIN MY OPINION."
- IT IS THE PRIVILEGE OF WOMEN TO TALK NONSENSE."
- REPROOFS OF IGNORANCE TALKING WITH THE CONFIDENCE OF KNOWLEDGE.
- BEING MUCH ANNOYED
- HE MATCHED A TRICK OF THE DEVIL.
- THREE CLASSICAL PUNS:
- HIS LAW ACT AT CAMBRIDGE.
- AN ACT KEPT BY DR. MILNER,
- EPIGRAM
- NOVEL REVENGE.
- THEY TAKE THEM AS THEY COME.
- THE DARLING SON OF HIS MOTHER,
- MISCALCULATING MAMMA,
- PRESENTING HIS FAVOURITE SON
- ITER ACADEMICUM; OR, THE GENTLEMAN COMMONER'S MATRICULATION.
- A STORY
- FRESHMEN OFTEN AFFORD MIRTH
- ANOTHER FRESHMAN
- WE MUST DO SOMETHING FOR THE POOR LOST YOUNG MAN.
- LIKE O' WHISSONSET CHURCH.
- CUSTOM, WHIM, FASHION, AND CAPRICE,
- A HEAVY FINE TO APPEAR IN BOOTS.
- YELLOW STOCKINGS.
- THE FASHION OF THE HAIR
- I.
- II.
- III.
- IV.
- V.
- VI.
- VII.
- VIII.
- IX.
- THE FIRST PRELATE THAT WORE A WIG
- THE OXFORD SCHOLARS WERE PROHIBITED FROM WEARING BOOTS AND SPURS.
- UNDERGRADUATE, WHIPPING,
- ARCHBISHOP BANCROFT
- WAKEFIELD'S EPIGRAM ON THE FLYING BARBER OF CAMBRIDGE,
- THE ISTHMUS OF SUEZ.
- YOU ARE TO PRAY AND FIGHT, NOT TO DRINK FOR THE CHURCH.
- SIGNS OF A GOOD APPETITE.
- A COLLEGE QUIZ.
- SUCKING THE MILK OF BOTH UNIVERSITIES
- LIKE RABELAIS,
- AMBASSADORS OF KING JESUS AT OXFORD.
- A SURPRISING EFFORT OF INTELLECT.
- JUDGMENT OF PROFESSOR HALLIFAX.
- THE CELEBRATED OXONIAN, DEAN TUCKER,
- OH! FOR A DISTICH.
- SKELETON SERMONS.
- I WISH HE HAD PAID IT FIRST.
- A MIND TO MAKE TRIAL OF THE STOCKS,
- LORD CHIEF JUSTICE PRATT,
- HISSING VERSUS MONEY.
- TWO OXFORD SCHOLARS POSING DR. HAYES,
- GROSS INDEED.
- PUN UPON PYE.
- THE CAMBRIDGE FAMILY OF SPINTEXTS
- DOCTOR ISAAC BARROW,
- DOCTOR SAMUEL PARR.
- ANOTHER CLASS OF PREACHERS
- THE THREE-HEADED PRIEST.
- MY BEEF BURNT TO A CINDER.
- SHORT HAND WRITING WAS INVENTED BY A CANTAB,
- THE HUMBLE PETITION OF THE LADIES.
- But the Doctor had
- A NATURAL TURN FOR HUMOUR,
- INGENIOUS REPARTEES
- CELEBRATED ALL OVER GERMANY.
- REBUSES AT OXFORD AND CAMBRIDGE.
- BECKINGTON.
- ALCOCK,
- EGLESFIELD,
- ASHTON.
- LAKE LEMAN.
- SOMETHING IN YOUR WAY.
- DUNS
- ODE ON THE PLEASURE OF BEING OUT OF DEBT.
- HORACE, ODE XXII. BOOK I. IMITATED.
- I.
- II.
- III.
- IV.
- V.
- VI.
- VII.
- QUEERING A DUN.
- GRAY THE POET A CONTRAST TO BISHOP WARBURTON.
- VALUE OF A WORD SPOKE IN DUE SEASON,
- THE CANONS OF CRITICISM,
- BISHOP BARRINGTON'S SPLENDID GIFT, AND OTHER TRAITS OF HIM.
- AN ADMIRABLE PULPIT ADMONITION
- THE SIMPLICITY OF GREAT MINDS.
- WATCH DOING TO A TURN IN THE SAUCEPAN.
- A HOST OF SINGULARITIES
- HIS WIG AND HAT FELL INTO THE WATER,
- HIS TRIPLE, THRICE-CONFUSED DISCOURSE,
- THE CELEBRATED LORD SANDWICH,
- THE INVENTOR OF SANDWICHES.
- LAPSUS LINGUÆ.
- OXFORD AND CAMBRIDGE LOYALTY.
- THE CUSHION PLOT,
- Terræ Filius relates the following instance of
- THE DANGER OF DRINKING THE KING'S HEALTH.
- AMONGST THE CAMBRIDGE CLUBS
- THE RETROGRADATION AMONGST MASTERS, TUTORS, AND SCHOLARS.
- THERE IS AN ON-DIT,
- THE WORCESTER GOBLIN.
- RECORDS OF THE CAMBRIDGE TRIPOSES.
- THE WOODEN SPOON.
- ODE TO THE UNAMBITIOUS AND UNDISTINGUISHED BACHELORS.
- A RARE MATHEMATICAL WIND."
- THE CLASSICAL TRIPOS AND THE WOODEN WEDGE.
- A PREVIOUS EXAMINATION
- SYLLOGISTIC EXERCISE FOR THE LITTLE-GO MEN.
- A DREADFUL FIT OF RHEUMATISM.
- DR. PARR AN INGRATE.
- MON DIEU--LE DIABLE.
- SOME CRITICAL CIVILITIES.
- BENTLEY SAID OF JOSHUA BARNES,
- SIR BUSICK AND SIR ISAAC AGAIN.
- COLE: DEUM.
- THE FRESHMAN'S PUZZLE.
- A SLY HUMOURIST.
- A STORY OF A NOBLE OXONIAN,
- IT IS RELATED OF THE SAME OXFORD WAG,
- WAS A PERSON OF SUCH CONSUMMATE GRAVITY,
- INVENTORY OF GOODS FOR SALE.
- THE END.
- CONTENTS.
- BY LIEUT. BURNES.
- CONTENTS.
- EXTRAORDINARY INDIVIDUALS.
- CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE.
- CREDULITY AND FANATICISM.
- VOLUNTARY HUMAN SUFFERING.
- INTERESTING OCCURRENCES.
- MAGPIE CASTLE.
- LEGENDS AND STORIES OF IRELAND.
- BY SAMUEL LOVER.
- THE PORT ADMIRAL.
- By the Author of "CAVENDISH."
- CAPTAIN ROSS'S LAST VOYAGE.
- WITH A PORTRAIT OF THE AUTHOR.
- THE NAVAL SKETCH-BOOK.
- BY CAPTAIN GLASCOCK.
- THE BLACK WATCH.
- TALES OF A PHYSICIAN.
- BY W. H. HARRISON.
- THE HIGHLAND SMUGGLERS.
- BY RICHARD SHARP.
- TOM CRINGLE'S LOG.
- BY CHARLES WHITEHEAD.
- New and cheap Edition, in Two Volumes, 12mo., of the
- TOUGH YARNS;
- BY THE OLD SAILOR.
- ALLEN BRECK.
- NIGHTS-AT-MESS.
- IN PREPARATION,
- LIST OF THE PLATES.
- FIRST SERIES.
- THIRD SERIES.
- PIN MONEY;
- WRITTEN BY HIMSELF.
- A SUBALTERN IN AMERICA;
- THE GENTLEMAN IN BLACK.
- FIVE NIGHTS OF ST. ALBANS.
- FRANCESCA CARRARA.
- PICTURE OF PHILADELPHIA;
- SICILIAN FACTS.
- CONTAINING PRACTICAL DIRECTIONS FOR THE CULTURE OF PLANTS IN THE
- HOT-HOUSE, GARDEN-HOUSE, FLOWER-GARDEN, AND ROOMS OR PARLOURS,
- HOT-HOUSE, GREEN-HOUSE, AND LAYING OUT A FLOWER-GARDEN.
- In One Volume, 12mo
- By MISS LESLIE, Author of the "SEVENTY-FIVE RECEIPTS."
- BY ROBERT GOOCH, M. D.
- BY GEORGE TATE, M. D.
- BY M. DE LEVIZAC.
- BY THOMAS PRIDGIN TEALE,
- BY JOSEPH HOULTON, M.D.
- TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES
- 1. Passages in italics are surrounded by _underscores_.
- 2. Obvious errors in punctuation have been silently corrected.
- 4. Certain words use oe ligature in the original.