Hints for
Hints for Lovers
作者：Haultain, Arnold, 1857-1941
体例：题 章数：141
字数：158,555 来源：Project Gutenberg
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章节目录
共 141 题- HINTS FOR LOVERS
- Boston : Houghton Mifflin Company : New York
- To Emma Mellicent Audrey
- Table of Contents
- PLEA: CONFESSION AND AVOIDANCE
- I. On Girls
- II. On Men
- III. On Women
- Men may be classified; women never. This is why
- Generalizing in the case of women is useless; since
- Women, apparently, were made for men; men for themselves. Certainly
- Woman is born to acting as the sparks fly upward. And
- When the child comes, the man stands aside. For
- Motherhood is the goal of womanhood. And
- No one knows what a woman is like till she is a mother. In other words
- All women are rivals. And this they never forget. Consequently
- To a woman's modesty ability is a wonderfully enhancing setting. And
- Modesty is the most complex and the most varied of emotions. Perhaps
- Fashion is a woman's sole law. And
- Women rightly dislike and disgust variability in men. For
- The feminine métier par excellence is: to allure. And
- Women are quick to recognize a rake. For
- The fragilest woman will be ill content with suppressed embraces. And
- The ablest-bodied woman loves being petted. Even
- Men regard the advent of the New Woman rather askance. Why? Because
- Abashment intensifies a woman's love for him so making her abashed. And
- There is a shame that is sweeter than joy. (As
- There is a fear more tremulous than delight.) For
- Ah! Love--love--love,--given love, what else is needed? (Unfortunately
- Dress and demeanor--these form the code of feminine ethics. Even
- IV. On Love
- As is one's character, so is one's love. And
- Love is merciless: as merciless to its votary as to its victim: For
- All love seeks is: love. Yet love little knows that
- In seeking love, love enters on an endless search. Since
- Love is an endless effort to realize the Ideal. For
- Love has a myriad counterfeits. And
- Men and women interpret the word differently. Even
- There is a whole gamut of love.--Changing that simile, we may say that
- Stifle love, and it dies down. So
- In love it is the man who protests; and
- Love (like murder) will out. But
- Jill keeps her secret better than Jack. For
- Love without hope, has its mitigations; but
- Love requires careful nature. And
- Did love demand it, love, though it might blush, would not blench. And
- Love loves to immolate itself for love. Knowing that
- To love, nothing is common or unclean: for
- Love, like charity, thinketh no evil. But--remember that
- Love is the most vulnerable of the emotions, and
- Love upsets all conventional conditions. For
- Tenderness is the worship of the soul by the soul. And
- Of all tests of love tenderness is the truest. But indeed, indeed
- V. On Lovers
- Love, with woman, is like the tides. And
- There is an element of self-love in the very extremest of love. Since
- The intenser the love, the more flawless does its object appear. For
- Was any lover ever loved enough? Or
- Did any ever hear of a tired lover? Nevertheless often
- A lover is full of wishes as an egg is full of meat. But
- The early nineteenth-century suitor protested; but
- Always what a man seeks in a woman is: love. And
- A Maud leaves the daisies rosy; not so Faustine.)
- The lover is ever worshipful. And
- Where is worship, nothing can be profane. So
- VI. On Making Love
- There are as many kinds of love as there are of flavors. And
- In love, as in all things, indecision spells ruination. For
- In the emotional matter of love, men and women so often lash. And perhaps
- Is even love aware of all its seeks? And
- Is it given to any to grant all that love beseeches? And yet
- There is nothing more potent than passion. And
- The eye tells more than the tongue. And
- By what women are won, few men know. Perhaps
- A mortgage is difficult to bind. For
- Repletion seems to cause, in the man, temporary indifference; while
- The veriest roué' is vulnerable to the veriest maid. But
- It is only the man who thinks he is too venturesome. Since
- The iciest woman sometimes thaws. And
- A woman's capitulation she always makes to appear as a capture. And
- Foolish that man who does not storm entrenchments. For
- A conditional surrender is no surrender. But
- The woman makes the opportunity which the man takes. And
- An opportunity missed is an opportunity lost. And
- With woman indifference is worse than insult. Wherefore
- Sought interviews are sweet, those unsought are sweeter. And
- A clandestine love always works havoc--havoc to all three. (4)
- VII. On Beauty
- What folly were the violet to envy the rose! Since
- Vesture and wearer are mutually one. And yet
- VIII. On Courtship
- The coquetry of love is the surest test of an unquestionable love. For
- What is suitable at one stage of courtship is ruinous at another. And
- No woman thinks she can be wooed too often. And
- In courtship the slightest suspicion of condescension is fatal. For
- The ideal proposal occurs only in novels. And yet--and yet--
- Ah! the momentary bliss of an unreasoning emotion! Yet
- Woman does right to keep her head, for
- IX. On Men and Women
- A woman judges a woman by her motives. (And
- To a man, a woman's heart is something mysterious. But
- The family is the unit of the state, therefore
- A man can never know too much. Perhaps a woman can. And
- Take a taciturn woman seriously. For always
- Man succumbs to his emotions. He cannot comprehend how it is that
- Reason and emotion are mortal foes; and
- In loving one woman a man believes in all women. And
- Which is only one more proof that
- Next to sympathy, flattery is perhaps woman's most effective weapon. And
- No masculine shield there is which woman's flattery will not pierce. For
- Woman's emotions are arms of precision. Yet
- Women act upon intuition, not upon reason. And
- To attract sometimes requires temporary repulsion. But
- Never, never show that you expect capitulation. And
- Women know women. And
- Women know that women know men. And
- A snub from a woman is never forgotten. And for two reasons: because
- A blush needs no apologies. (Why? Because
- Always a blush is spontaneous, uncontrollable; and
- To sum up: between men and women
- The Heavenly Aphrodite is true friend to the Earthly.(4) So
- X. On Jealousy
- Jealousy is no proof of love, for
- Even an Othello is jealous of even an Iago. Yet
- XI. On Kisses and Kissing
- A kiss may mean so very much--or so very little. Wherefore
- XII. On Engagements and on Being Engaged
- The recurrence of love is apt to spoil its romance. And yet--and yet--
- When men fall in love, they fall in love with a vengeance; and
- Affection seeks affection, passion is only appeased by passion. Yet
- Love, without confidence, is as defunct as faith without works. For
- Ah! Love, not in every conflict art thou victor crowned. (2)
- XIII. On Marriage and Married Life
- Reformers of marriage laws should seek a preventative, not a cure; since
- Sentiment, not intellect, is the cementing material in marriage, and
- Many a man, by woman, is taken on trust. It is difficult to tell whether
- The promissory note of marriage is undated and unendorsed. But
- No man will play second fiddle to any body or any thing; and
- O youth, cleave unto the wife of thy bosom; since
- XIV. On this Human Heart
- No heart, under repeated temperings, can remain forever keen. And