Another gust of wind came and blew my jacket away. Then I hoisted my
shirt. That blew away and I hoisted my socks. Those followed, and I
hoisted my trousers.
Say, but it was good I had that barrel. Those pajamas saved my life,
though. A week later a passing steamer caught sight of my signal of
distress and rescued me.
The first thing I asked the captain was if Rufus had been saved.
"Why," says he, "haven't you heard? He landed at Savannah and cornered
the cotton market to the tune of ten million dollars, but he says he's a
ruined man because he lost his yacht."
Say, how do you stand on the servant question? I had a girl that beat
all outdoors for intelligence.
The other day my wife went out to do some shopping and left Bridget in
charge of the house.
When she returned she asked Bridget if any one had called for her.
"Sure, mum," says she, "the babbie called for you all the while you were
gone."
[Illustration]
That night, when I came home to dinner, I couldn't eat a thing.
Everything that wasn't glowing embers, was charcoal. I gave my wife a
lecture and told her to fire the girl at once.
My wife went down to Bridget's stronghold and said:
"Bridget, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you'll have to find another place."
"Whoy so, mum?" asked Bridget.
"Well, my husband thinks there's too much waste in the kitchen."
"For the land's sakes, if you'll only let me stay, mum, I'll get a
twenty-two corset and lace it until I can't breathe."
One day a friend of mine came to me and says:
"I see you have Bridget Harrohan around the house."
"Yes," says I.
"Do you know that she was in her last situation five years."
"No," says I; "where was that?"
[Illustration]
"Sing Sing," says he.