The striped snaix is one ov the garden varietys. They inhabit door
yards, and stun heaps down at the foot ov the garden, and piles ov old
boards, and weedy spots, and grass generally.
[Illustration]
They are the domestik snaik, if thare iz enny such thing, and are really
az harmless az an old garter, but az full ov fraid tew almost every
boddy, az a torpedo.
The fust snaix, we hav enny ackount ov much, waz the devil, surnamed
bellyzebubb, who wiggled his way into the Garden of Eden, and without a
single trump in hiz hand, beat our two original ansesstors, out ov joy
inneffible, and glory halleluyer forever, and gave them in exchange for
it sorrow without stint, and wo unutterabel. This was an unkommon poor
trade for the human family. All snaiks are sneaks, and steal around on
their slippry stummuks, az still, and greazy, az lamp ile.
Snaix kant stand the enkroachments ov civilizashun, the seed ov the
woman iz alwus after them with a long pole, and a man, post haste for a
doktor, will alwuss dismount, and hich hiz animile hoss, tew put an
extra hed onto a snaix.
This kind ov treatment has alwus made snaiks raizing a dredful risky
bizzness teu follow.
Out ov one thousand snaixs born annually, the staytisstix sho 930 ov
them die in a grate hurry, espeshily whare churches and school houses
flourish.
I don't kno ov a more unhelthy spot in the world for a snaix teu settle
down and undertaik teu bring up a family than near a distrikt school
house.
Let enny body just holler "_striped snaix_" once, near a distrikt school
house, and you will see the snaix begin teu paddle, and the young ones
begin tew bile out like hornets out ov their nest, and proceed for that
snaix like a flok of young turkeys for a Junebug.
Striped snaiks are about two feet and one haff in length, and about one
inch in diameter, and "thareby hangs a tail."