I
If one were to declare himself a Democrat or a Republican and the claim
should be contested he would find it a difficult one to prove. The
missing link in his chain of evidence would be the major premise in
the syllogism necessary to the establishment of his political status—a
definition of “Democrat” or “Republican.” Most of the statesmen in
public and private life who are poll-parroting these words, do so with
entire unconsciousness of their meaning, or rather without knowledge
that they have lost whatever meaning they once had. The words are mere
“survivals,” marking dead issues and covering present allegiances of
the loosest character. On any question of importance each party is
divided against itself and dares not formulate a preference. There is
no question before the country upon which one may not think and vote as
he likes without seriously affecting his standing in the denomination
of political saints of which he professes himself a member. “Party
lines” are as terribly confused as parallels of latitude and longitude
after a twisting earthquake, or those aimless lines representing
competing railroads on a map published by a company operating “the
only direct route.” It is not probable that this state of things can
last; if there is to be “government by party”—and we should be sad to
think that so inestimable a boon were soon to return to Him who gave
it—men must begin to let their angry passions rise and take sides. “Ill
fares the land to hastening ills a prey,” where the people are too wise
to dispute and too good to fight. Let us have the good old political
currency of bloody noses and cracked crowns; let the yawp of the
demagogue be heard in the land; let ears be pestered with the spargent
cheers of the masses. Give us a whoop-up that shall rouse us like a
rattling peal of thunder! Will nobody be our Moses—there should be two
Moseses—to lead us through this detestable wilderness of political
stagnation?