need yesterday. When I had again nothing in hand, to meet todays
necessities, a sister came last evening, who brought me 1l. 6s., a
sovereign from another sister, and 6s. from herself. She said: "I do
not know whether the Orphans have a dinner for tomorrow or not, but I
had no rest in delaying to bring this money." I had but just then
come home from a meeting, and had on the way to my house been lifting
up my heart to the Lord, that He would be pleased to remember our
need.--This morning was sent from Clapham 1l. 2s. 6d., with 3 frocks,
a petticoat, 4 handkerchiefs, and 2 pinafores.
My dear reader, do you indeed recognise the hand of God in all these
instances I have given instance upon instance, I have brought before
you not this particular case, nor another particular case; but I have
purposely shown you how we have fared day after day in our poverty,
in order that you may adore the Lord for His goodness to us, and that
you yourself may be led to depend upon Him for every thing, should
you not have done so before. I affectionately beseech you, not to
take these instances as a matter of course. Say not in your heart,
This is a charitable Institution; persons know that the maintenance
of these many Orphans, and the support of these Day Schools, etc.,
costs much money; and therefore they will contribute. Nor suffer
Satan to rob you of the blessing which the account of the Lords
faithfulness to us, and His readiness to listen to our supplications
is calculated with Gods blessing, to communicate to you, by allowing
him to whisper into your ears, that, because the Report are read by
many, donations will of course be coming in, and that not all at
once, but gradually, and that this is the way in which we are
supplied. Dear reader, it is not thus. Suppose, we have been for some
time on the whole bountifully supplied. Suppose, now all is gone.
Suppose, the expenses are great, but very little comparatively is
coming in. What shall we do now? If we took goods on credit, or if we
made known our necessities at such times to the liberal Christians
who have means, and who are interested in the work in our hands,
then, humanly speaking, there might be little difficulty; but we
neither take goods on credit, nor do we speak to any one about our
need, but we wait upon God. Now, suppose our expenses are week after
week, 30l., 40l., 50l., or 60l.? How are the means to come? Persons
might still give; yea, many persons might still give, but it might
just happen so, that all the donations that are received at the time
when our expenses are most heavy are very small donations; how shall
we do then? Sometimes the outgoings have been so great, that if I had
sold every thing I possessed, I could not thereby have met the
expenses of two weeks. What then is to be done? We wait upon God, and
he always helps us, and has done so now [i. e. in 1881] for more than
forty-five years with reference to the Orphans, and for more than
forty-seven with reference to the other parts of the work.
Feb. 5. Saturday. As only 10l. 10s. 6d. had been received since
January 29th, i. e. only so much as day by day was needed to provide
necessaries for the Orphans, there is again the greatest need. It is
now twelve oclock, and there are no means as yet to meet the
expenses of today. The words in the prayer of Jehoshaphat, "Neither
know we what to do, but our eyes are upon Thee," are at this moment
the language of my heart. I likewise know not what to do, but my eyes
are upon the Lord, and I am sure that He will help this day also. Our
kind Father still gives us proofs that He is mindful of our need; for
last evening were anonymously sent to my house, 2 waistcoats, a
shawl, a net collar, 3 3/4 yards of print, 2 decanters, and
Clarendons History of England. And just now, a small silver book, a
pepper box with silver top, and some muslin work have arrived from
Birmingham.--Evening. In the course of the morning came in, by sale
of articles, l2s. We were able likewise to dispose of one of the
articles, which were sent last evening, for 5s. This afternoon one of
the labourers gave me 10s., and 3s. came in for needle-work. By means
of this 1l. 10s. we were able to supply all that was needed.
Feb. 7. Yesterday was received 1l. 13s. 5d., and today 5s. 6d.
Feb. 8. By what came in yesterday, and the day before, the need of
yesterday was supplied, and there is enough in all the houses for the
meals of today; but in none of the houses have we been able to take
in any bread; and as yesterday also but little could be taken in,
there will not remain any for tomorrow; nor is there money enough to
take in milk tomorrow morning. There are likewise coals needed in two
houses. Indeed, so far as I know, these three years and seven months,
since first the funds were exhausted, we were never in greater
poverty; and if the Lord were not to send means before nine oclock
tomorrow morning, His name would be dishonoured. But I am fully
assured that He will not leave us.--Evening. The Lord has not yet been
pleased to send us what is needed for tomorrow, but He has given us a
fresh proof that He is mindful of us. Between four and five oclock
this afternoon were sent nine plum cakes, which a sister had ordered
to be baked as a treat for the Orphans. These cakes were an
encouragement to me to continue to look out for further supplies.
There was also found in the boxes at the Orphan-Houses, 2s. l 1/2d.,
and 1s. 4d. came in for stockings. These little donations are most
precious, but they are not enough to meet the need of tomorrow; yea,
before nine oclock tomorrow morning we need more money to be able to
take in the milk. Truly, we are poorer than ever; but, through grace,
my eyes look not at the empty stores and the empty purse, but to the
riches of the Lord only.
Feb. 9. This morning I went between seven and eight o clock to the
Orphan-Houses, to see whether the Lord had sent in any thing. When I
arrived there, He had just two or three minutes before sent help.--A
brother, in going to his house of business this morning, had gone
already about half a mile, when the Lord was pleased to lay the
Orphans upon his heart. He said, however, to himself, I cannot well
return now, but will take something this evening; and thus he walked
on. Nevertheless he could not go any further, but felt himself
constrained to go back, and to take to brother R. B., at the
Boys-Orphan-House, three sovereigns. [The donor himself stated this
to me afterwards.]--Thus the Lord in His faithfulness helped us. Help
was never more truly needed, for our poverty was never greater; nor
did the help of the Lord ever come more manifestly from Himself; for
the brother was gone on a good distance, it was between seven and
eight oclock in the morning, and it was so short a time before money
was needed. Consider this, beloved reader, and with us praise the
Lord. Praise Him particularly, that He enabled us to trust in Him in
this trying hour. There came in besides, today, 7s. 6d.
Feb. 11. The 3l. 11s. 6d. supplied our need the last two days. Today
again a few shillings more were needed, which one of the labourers
was able to give of his own; but this was only enough to take in the
usual quantity of milk, and some bread.
Feb. 12. Saturday. Never since the funds were for the first time
exhausted, had there come in less during any week, than during this.
We were only able to supply the absolute necessities; but this we
were enabled to do. When the meal times came, the Lord always
provided what was needful, and, considering the great distress there
is now almost everywhere, our dear Orphans are very well provided
for. Now this day began not only without there being any thing in
hand, but our stores were greatly reduced, and we had to procure
provisions for two days. One of the labourers gave 5s. in the
morning, to provide the means to take in the milk. I collected
together some pamphlets, which had been given for sale, to dispose of
them, and they were sold about eleven oclock for 4s. There came in
also by sale of stockings 3s., and 12s. was paid on behalf of one of
the Orphans. Thus we were provided with means to procure a dinner,
and had a little towards purchasing bread, but by no means enough.
All the labourers were together in prayer from half-past eleven till
one, and me separated comfortably, with the purpose of meeting again
in the evening. When I came home, there was given to me an old broken
silver pencil case, which, though worth very little, I took as a
fresh proof that our Father was mindful of our need. When we met
again this evening, we found that 3s. 6d. had come in by sale of
stockings, and 6d. for two Reports. As all this was not enough, a few
old and needless articles were disposed of for 4s., also the broken
pencil ease for 6d. I say needless articles, for other articles it
did not seem right to us to dispose of, in order that the Lords own
deliverance might be manifest. A labourer was also still further able
to give 7s. of his own. To one of the labourers 2s. had been owed by
a certain individual for more than a twelvemonth, which being paid
just now, and given by him for the Orphans, came in most seasonably.
Thus we had 1l. 18s. 6d., as much as was needful to procure
provisions till after breakfast on Monday morning. However, the Lord
helped still further. Between eight and nine this evening, after we
had been together for prayer, and had now separated, some money was
given to one of the labourers for himself, by which means he was able
to give 9s., so that altogether 2l. 7s. 6d. had come in this day.
This has been of all the weeks, during the last three years and seven
months, one of the most trying, so far as it regards the trial of
faith. Thanks to the Lord, who has helped us this day also! Thanks to
Him for enabling us already this morning, when we met for prayer, to
praise Him for the deliverance, which we were sure He would work!
Feb. 14. Yesterday came in from Wolverhampton 1l. 2s. 6d. and a
necklace. There was also given to me 1l. 0s. 6d., which had come in
by sale of articles, and 6d. for Reports. In the course of this day
came in still further 3l. 2s. 4d.
Feb. 15. By needlework came in 4s. 9d.
Feb. 16. This morning there was now again only sufficient money in
hand to take in milk at two of the houses; but as a labourer was able
to give 6s. 6d., we had sufficient for the milk, and had also enough,
with the provisions that were in the houses, to provide for the
dinner. Nothing more came in in the course of the morning, nor was I
able to make inquiries how matters stood. In the afternoon between
three and four oclock, having once more besought the Lord to send us
help, I sat peacefully down to give myself to meditation over the
Word, considering that that was now my service, though I knew not
whether there was a morsel of bread for tea in any one of the houses,
but being assured that the Lord would provide. For, through grace, my
mind is so fully assured of the faithfulness of the Lord, that, in
the midst of the greatest need, I am enabled in peace to go about my
other work. Indeed, did not the Lord give me this, which is the
result of trusting in Him, I should scarcely be able to work at all;
for it is now comparatively a rare thing that a day comes, when I am
not in need for one or the other part of the work. Scarcely had I sat
down to meditate, when a note was sent to me from the Orphan-Houses,
in which brother R. B., master of the Orphan Boys, had written thus:
"On visiting the sisters in the Infant and Girls-Orphan-Houses, I
found them in the greatest need. There was not bread in one of the
houses for tea this evening, and the 6s. 6d. was scarcely enough to
supply what was needed for the dinner. I therefore opened the box in
the Boys-Orphan-House, and most unexpectedly found 1l. in it. Thus,
through the kindness of the Lord, we were again abundantly supplied
as it regards present necessities."--In the evening the Lord, in His
love and faithfulness, stretched out His hand still farther. I had
expounded at the meeting a part of John xi. The last words of which I
spoke were: "Said I not unto thee, that, if thou wouldest believe,
thou shouldest see the glory of God?" When the meeting was over, as a
fresh proof of the truth of this word, a note was given to me, in
which a sick sister sent me 5l. for the Orphans.
Feb. 17 and 18. These two days came in 8s. 2d.
Feb. 19. Saturday. Our means were now again completely spent. Our
provision stores, were, perhaps, even more exhausted than on any
previous Saturday. There was not the least human likelihood of
obtaining menus for sufficient provisions for this one day, and much
less for two days. When I went before breakfast to the Orphan-Houses,
I found a letter from Nottingham, containing 1s., which had arrived
last evening. This was not only a sweet proof that our Father
remembered our need, but it was also like an earnest that He
would supply us this day also with all we required. In the course
of the morning came in by sale of stockings 4s. 11d. In the box at my
house I found 1s. One of the labourers gave 4s. 10d. Thus we were
provided with those things which were absolutely needed for this day.
We met between eleven and twelve oclock for prayer. When we met
again in the evening, a second letter had arrived from Nottingham,
with another shilling. This was a further sweet proof of our Fathers
loving remembrance of our need; but with all this we were still
without any means to provide bread for tomorrow, the Lords day. At
eight oclock I separated from my fellow-labourers, as I expected
brother R. C. to arrive a little after eight at my house. I therefore
requested one of the brethren to go with me, in order to take back to
the Orphan-Houses what the Lord might send in by post or in any other
way. It was now half-past eight in the evening, and there was no
bread yet in any one of the three houses for tomorrow. A few moments
after, brother C. arrived, and he had not been more than about five
minutes in my house when he gave me half a sovereign, which he
brought for the Orphans. I soon found an opportunity to leave the
room for a little, gave the 10s. to the brother whom I had brought
with me from the Orphan Houses, and who was waiting in another room;
and thus, between nine and ten oclock, sufficient bread could be
bought. Observe! For the trial of our faith the Lord had allowed us
to be kept waiting so long. When, however, brother C. had arrived,
having money for the Orphans, he could not delay giving it at once, a
matter most worthy of notice. This has been a week full of trials of
faith, but also full of deliverances.
Feb. 21. Since Saturday evening came in 1l. 8s. 11d. There was also
sent from Plymouth, a piece of blond, a piece of quilling net, and
eleven pairs of childrens stockings, for sale. Thus we were supplied
with means for that which was requisite for the beginning of this
day; but as our stores had been so reduced at the end of last week,
there was not enough for tea this afternoon. Four oclock had now
come, one hour before the usual tea time, when a brother from
Somersetshire came to see the Orphan-Houses, and put a sovereign into
each of the boxes. Our great need soon brought out the money, and
thus we were supplied. [Observe! The brother (as he himself told me a
few days after in the course of conversation), had but little time,
and therefore rather hastily went over the houses. Had he stayed long
and conversed much, as might have been the case, his donations would
not have been in time for the tea.] There came in 1s. besides, by
needlework done by the children.
Feb. 22. This morning a parcel arrived from the neighbourhood of
Manchester, containing 4 old silver thimbles, 1 seal, 2 gold pins, 10
cent (an American coin), a buckle, a watch key, a broken seal, some
pamphlets and 549 sheets of Hintwafers.
Feb. 23. We were again in want of means. A few of the articles which
had come from Manchester were disposed of, and one of the labourers
was able to give enough for what remained to be supplied.--The
narrative of time events of these days is most imperfect. The way in
which the Lord stretched out His hand day by day, and from meal to
meal, cannot be accurately described. To enter fully into it, one
need be a witness to His inspecting the stores, so to speak, from
meal to meal, and giving us those things which we needed.
Feb. 24. Yesterday the following clothes were sent: 3 pairs of boys
trousers, 2 boys dresses, 2 frocks, a spencer, 5 pairs of childrens
stays, a pair of boots, and a few other little articles. The clothes
were all much worn, and in other respects not fit for the Orphans;
but the Lord used them to supply us with the means for the dinner, as
they were disposed of this morning. In the afternoon we again met for
prayer. On my way to the Orphan-Houses, between four and five, when I
knew that there would not be any bread, at least in one of the
houses, for tea, I felt quite peaceful, being fully assured that for
this meal also the Lord would provide. On inquiry I found that there
was bread enough in the Girls-Orphan-House, none at all in the
Boys-Orphan-House, but enough in the Infant-Orphan-House both for
the Infants and Boys. Therefore we were at this time supplied by the
bread which was not needed at the Infant-Orphan-House. We have thus
this day also what is absolutely needful. But now there is no bread
in any of the houses, nor scarcely any thing else in the way of
provisions.
Feb. 25. Greater than now our need had never been. Our trials of
faith have never been so sharp as during this week. Indeed, so much
so, that most of the labourers felt today considerably tried. Yet
neither this day has the Lord suffered us to be confounded. Through a
remarkable circumstance one of the labourers obtained some money this
morning, so that all the need of today could be amply met. In the
afternoon a physician of this city kindly sent 1l. for the Orphans,
which was a sweet proof to us, when we met for prayer, that our kind
Father had not forgotten us. Also on my way to the prayer-meeting at
the Orphan-Houses I received 9s.
Feb. 26. My prayer this morning was in particular, that the Lord
would be pleased now to look in pity upon us, and take off His hand.
Indeed, for several days my prayer has been that He would enable us
to continue to trust in Him, and not lay more upon us than He would
enable us to bear. This is now again Saturday. There having been
given yesterday a rich supply to the matrons, I knew that not so much
as usual would be required this Saturday; still I thought that 1l.
10s. would be needed. Between ten and eleven oclock this morning a
parcel came from Clapham, containing 2l. 2s., with 2 frocks, 2
petticoats, 2 chemises, 2 pinafores, and 6 handkerchiefs (all new.)
Thus we were richly supplied for today, for only 1l. 10s. was needed.
There was moreover half-a-sovereign put into the box at my house this
day by a little boy, and 2s. 6d. came in by sale of articles. Thus we
were brought to the close of a week in which more than at any
previous time the Lord has been pleased to try our faith. To Him most
manifestly we owe it that our faith has not failed completely.
Feb. 28. Yesterday Q. Q. gave me an order for 8l. As it was left to
me to lay out the money as I thought well, I put 4l. of it to the
School-Fund, and 4l. to the Orphan-Fund. Thus both parts of the work
have been again most seasonably helped, as today the teachers in the
Day-Schools greatly needed some money for themselves. Today 13s. was
received for the Orphans.
March 2. Yesterday I found a sovereign in the Orphan-box at my house;
received 9s. 2 3/4d. from three little boys, being the produce of
their Orphan-box; 2s. 6d. for Reports; and 1l. 10s., being the profit
of the sale of ladies baskets. Thus we were again supplied for
yesterday and today. This evening were also sent, by order of an
Irish sister, 33 1/2 lbs. of woollen yarn. Respecting this donation
it is to be remarked, that last Saturday we had asked the Lord in our
prayer-meeting, that He would be pleased to send us means to purchase
worsted, in order that the boys might go on with their knitting.
March 3. Yesterday 5s. came in, and this evening a sovereign, when
there was now again great need, there being no money in hand.
March 5. Saturday. It was not a small deliverance, that the Lord sent
this morning, between ten and eleven oclock, 2l. 10s. from
Edinburgh, when there were no means in hand to meet this days
necessities, nay, not even the means to procure a dinner, as only 4s.
had come in yesterday.--Evening. About eight oclock a gentleman
called on me. He said "I come at a late hour, but I trust not the
less acceptable on that account. I bring you a little money for the
Orphans." He then gave me two sovereigns. When I requested him to
give me his name, he told me, that if the giving of his name would be
of any benefit he would do so, but as it would not, I might simply
put down in the Report "Sent," for he was sure that the Lord had sent
him.--I believe it, for the help came most seasonably and in answer
to prayer. There was likewise taken out of the box in my house
half-a-sovereign.
March 9. At a time of the greatest need, both with regard to the
Day-Schools and the Orphans, so much so that we could not have gone
on any longer without help, I received this day 10l. from a brother
who lives near Dublin. The money was divided between the Day-Schools
and the Orphan-Houses. The following little circumstance is to be
noticed respecting this donation:--As our need was so great, and my
soul was, through grace, truly waiting upon the Lord, I looked out
for supplies in the course of this morning. The post, however, was
out, and no supplies had come. This did not in the least discourage
me. I said to myself, the Lord can send means without the post, or
even now, though the post is out, by this very delivery of letters He
may have sent means, though the money is not yet in my hands. It was
not long after I had thus spoken to myself, when, according to my
hope in God, we were helped; for the brother who sent us the 10l.,
had this time directed his letter to the Boys-Orphan-House, whence
it was sent to me.
March 11. Yesterday a box arrived from one of the Northern Counties,
respecting which the donor had requested that neither the articles
which it contained, nor the name of the place whence it came, should
be mentioned in the public account. I, therefore, only state here
that thus the Lord has again most seasonably helped us, besides
giving us a fresh proof, in raising up this new and anonymous donor,
that He does not cease to care for us. It is intended to apply the
produce of the articles contained in the box partly for the Orphans,
and partly for the other objects. Though the box arrived only
yesterday, we are even this day helped through means of it; for we
disposed today of some of the articles to the amount of 9l. 6s. 6d.
Of this sum 7l. 6s. 6d. was divided among the teachers, who much
needed it; and 2l. was taken for the Orphan-Fund, without which the
need of this day could not have been supplied in the Orphan-Houses.