Puff me away from the noise and the worry;
Puff me away from the desolate town;
Puff me--but don't be in too great a hurry;
Puff me, but don't in a tunnel break down.
Puff me away to my loved Isle of Thanet
Swiftly--or e'en at the pace called the snail's,
Puff me the sea-breeze, and pleasantly fan it
Into my nostrils--but don't leave the rails.
Puff me away, far from Parliament's houses;
For brown moors of Scotland my soul is athirst--
For a smell of the heather, a pop at the grouses;
Puff me, but mind that your boiler don't burst.
Puff me _en route_ for care-killing Killarney,
Tenderly take me, as bridegroom his bride;
Bear me towards Erin, blest birthplace of Blarney,
Puff, puff, like blazes--but, _please_, don't "collide!"
* * * * *
[Illustration: DIGNITY AND IMPUDENCE
_Customer_ (Time--_Saturday afternoon_). "I don't want all coppers in
change for that shilling. Haven't you got any silver?"
_Newsboy._ "All right, sir. Want a little Sunday money, I s'pose, sir?"]
* * * * *