_The Traveller describeth the place of his birth and Parents, the death
of his elder Brother, and how through the perswasion of his Father; he
resolved to follow thieving._
I was born in _Goldin-Lane_, a place scituate in the Suburbs of
_London_, my Fathers name was _Isaac_, and by reason of his small
stature was commonly called little _Isaac_, being a native of the same
place, and by profession a Cobler; but such was his courage that he
was much troubled when any one called him Cobler; and would reply,
that he was a Translator, or a Transmographer of shooes. His Wife, who
I believe was my Mother, was named _Ursula_; she was in the beginning
of her dayes one of those sort of people that we call _Gipsies_, or
_Canting-Beggars_, and my Father travelling into the Country, and
wanting money to pay for a bed at night, he was forced to take up his
lodging in a barn, where he first came to be acquainted with my
Mother; whether they were ever married or no, I cannot tell, though I
suppose they only took each others words, as being willing to save the
charge of a Priests-hire. But notwithstanding the darkness of her
complexion (as those sort of people commonly have,) there is not so
bad a Jill, but there is as bad a Jack, for it was not long before she
hornifid my Father by a Banbury Tinker: which thing was so well known
amongst the neighbors, that they would commonly make horns with their
fingers, and point at him as he passed along the streets. My eldest
brother at seven years of age attained to such ingenuity that he
seldom carried home any mended shooes to a Gentlemans or Citizens
house, but he would filch either linnen, silver-spoons, or something
else of worth, which by negligent servants was not laid up safely;
which trade he drave for some space of time, being by reason of his
childish years not in the least suspected, but the pitcher goes not so
often to the well, but at length it comes broken home: In processe of
time he was taken with the theft, and for the same carried to
_Newgate_, where poor little Angel (peace be with him) he dyed in
prison, under the pennance of a discipline which was applied to him
with a little too much rigour.
Our whole family smarted in his punishment, my father sighed, my mother
sobbed, and I wanted my part of those dainty morsels, which his theft
furnished us withall, for by him my father drave a pretty trade; having
those who always furnished him with ready money for whatsoever he
brought, and indeed his loss would have utterly disconsolated my father,
but the great hopes that he had in mee, who was now come to the same age
that my brother was of when he first began to exercise his gifts in the
mystery of theivery; and that I might tread the same steps that my
brother had done before me, my father (upon a certain day, when my
mother and he and I were alone by our selves) began thus for to
endoctrinate me.
My son (said he) the profession of a thief is not of so base repute as
the world gives it out, considering what brave men have in former times
exercised themselves in this way: I have heard the Clerk of our parish
say, who I assure you was a well read man, that _Robin Hood_ that famous
thief was in his yonger dayes Earl of _Huntingdon_; and that _Alexander
the Great_ was no better then a thief in robbing other Princes of their
Kingdoms and Crowns. (_This it seems he spake in vindication of the
Sexton, who used to rob the dead corps of their sheets and shirts, and
those other necessaries which they carried along with them in their
voyage to heaven._) I tell thee he who steales not, knows not how to
live in this world, nay doth not almost each thing in the world teach us
for to steal? doe we not see youth steal upon infancy, manhood steale
upon youth, and old age upon manhood, until at last death stealeth upon
us undiscern’d and bringeth us to our long homes: How doth summer steal
on the spring, autumn on summer, and winter on autumn, untill all the
whole year is stole out of our sight. Pray what doe rich Farmers and
griping Cormorants, but steal when they exact in their prices of corn,
and grind the faces of the poor; and how can shop-keepers wipe off the
aspersion of theft from themselves when they sell a commodity for twice
the worth of it, and thereby cozen the buyer; so that we see if things
be rightly scanned, there be more thieves in the world than only
Taylors, Millers, and Weavers. And what I pray you makes Serjants,
Bayliffs, and Catchpoles so to envy us, and persecute us as they doe,
but that one trade still envies and malignes another; and would by their
good wills suffer no other theives but themselves; this it is that makes
them so double diligent in the surprizal of us, though oftentimes our
craft forestals their malice, as I shall instance to you in one
memorable example.
My self and two of my comrades had agreed to rob a rich Usurer, whose
younger brother having vitiously wasted his estate, was forced to take
this his brothers house for sanctuary, where he kept as close as a snail
in his shell, unless only at such times when as he imagined the darkness
of the night might shrewd him in obscurity, he so dreaded these shoulder
clappers, who stick closer to a man than a bur on his cloak, for being
once got into their clutches, you may as soon wring _Hercules_ club out
of his fist, as get free from their fingers; and herein have thieves a
great priviledge over debters, for the most notorious thief that ever
was, once in a months time he is carted out of prison, as others for
smaller matters are freed from durance by following the cart, where a
fellow with a catt of nine tayles doth play him such a lesson, as makes
him to skip and mount for joy of his deliverance; but with a poor debter
the case is far different, for being once in prison, the best teame of
Horses that ever drew in a waggon, cannot draw him out from thence
without a silver hook.
But to speak of that (some) which more properly belongs unto thee (for I
suppose thou wilt never attain to such credit as for to be laid up in
prison for debt,) by the help of a servant of the house, who went
sharers with us in our prey, we got a false key made to the back door,
whereby (one night) we attained an easie entrance, and loaded our
selves, to our hearts content; but in our return one of our companions
chanced to sneeze, and therewithal brake wind so violently behind, that
it waked the old usurer, who suspitious of the least noise presently
cryed out _Thieves, thieves_: _Trusty Roger_ his man was very ready to
rise at first allarm, fearing that our discovery might prove prejudicial
to his liberty, and lighting a candle, pretended to search every hole in
the house, into which it was possible for a mouse to enter; In the meane
time we lay close, yet not, unperceived by this false servant, who very
formally told his Master that all was safe and well, and that he might
take his rest without any fear; But the dread of his hearing us
prolonged our stay, so long, that day began to approach, whereupon
fearing more danger from without than from within, we prepared for our
departure, but having opened the door, we found that we had leapt out of
the frying pan into the fire, and by shunning _Scylla_ were fallen into
_Charibdis_, for four of these Catchpoles were waiting at the door for
the Usurers brother, having intelligence belike that he used to make the
dusky morning and dark evening the two shrowds that carried him safely
out and into his Brothers house; Now I going out of the door first, one
of these robustious fellows laid hands upon me, taking me for the party
they waited for, my two companions endeavouring to rescue me were seized
on by the other three Baylifs, so that we seeing no hopes of escape,
resolved to cry whore first, and with full mouth cryed out _Thieves,
thieves_; _Trusty Roger_ and the man that should have been arrested,
hearing this cry, took weapons in their hands, and out of doors they
came, where _Roger_ soon perceiving how the business went _ah you
Rogues_ (said he) _doe you come to rob my Master_? and thereupon laid so
nimbly about him, being seconded by the other, that the Bailiffs were
glad to let us go to defend themselves. Whilest they were thus busied in
pelting each other, we slipped away with our prize, and to take a full
revenge of those Catch-poles, raised several of the neighbors, whom we
sent to the apprehending of the Bayliffs, whilest we marched away in
safety; what became of them afterwards I doe not know, onely this I tell
thee, to let thee see that there is not any danger whatsoever so great,
but by wit and cunningness may be avoided. This story I heard with great
attention which so wrought upon my mind that I thought my self no less
than a second _Robin Hood_ or little _John_, and thereupon resolved to
put in speedy execution my fathers dictates which yet proved very
unfortunate to me, as you will finde by that which follows.
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