TIMBER PILES.
Manipulation for "Extra" Profit.
"Now, I'll tell you about a bit of 'extra' dodging that rather scared
me. First, let me say, no one can ever know how much I hate waste--it
can't be measured."
"You and me are alike, a couple of turtle doves on that question."
"We are. Finish up, and we will have another. I remember Lord
Palmerston said, dirt was matter out of place, or something like that.
Now I think piles are often good timber out of place, so I followed
that lesson and said to myself 'What a lot of good timber is going to
be buried; and really it is breaking and loosening the ground too much
to please me, and that's a mistake, besides placing extra weight on
it'; so after dwelling on the subject as much as suited me, I decided
it was waste, and that it was poison to me. I had trouble on my mind
about it and it made me feel thirsty and does now. Pour another out."
"There you are."
"I'm better now. Well, I wrestled over the waste question some time,
and finally made up my mind not to be a party to it, it being against
my principles, and, like us all, no man shall make me swerve from them,
especially when they agree with my pocket."
"Certainly; shake hands. That is good!"
"Well, there was only one way to do it, so in order that every one
might have their way to a certain extent I decided to drive first one
pile to the depth as ordered and one to the depth that suited me, and
therefore both parties were satisfied and believed they had got what
they wanted; for while I left the other man, that is the
engineer--excuse the disrespect--to his happy thoughts, I descended to
simple practice in a way very comforting to me. Knowing it is not every
pile which is driven that drives whole, or is according to drawing,
many often being twisted and knocked to shreds--although I have seen
them driven through a layer of old brickwork, and whole, too--and that
there is a lot of uncertainty about them in some ground, I dwelt on the
matter, and came to the conclusion that according to the drawings every
other pile would be driven about 3 to 4 feet too far down, and that all
concerned hardly agreed upon the depth to which all of them should be
driven, and that I was the chief one to be considered; so I cut off a
few feet of the top of nearly every other pile, and varied the length
according to whether the pile happened to drive hardly or went down
gently."
"Precisely."
"Somehow or other the ground seemed really grateful to me, for more of
the piles were cut off than I originally intended. They must have
passed the tip--may be the worms did it; anyhow the ground, after a few
had been driven, seemed to become harder, and we had more sawing to do
than ever. I like sawing. You see your work, and all is above board and
nothing hidden and no deception. Suits our principles. Now, you are
like me, you don't wish to disturb other people's minds, we are built
on the lines of love too much, and tenderness is better than anger any
day."
"That's it. I consider you were doing a kindness all round, or as near
to it as makes no difference!"
"Well, in order not to disturb any one, it took some thinking over as
to the best time to ease off the tops. I mean cut the heads off and put
the rings on again, and give the tops a properly seasoned appearance. I
used to call it put their hair right. Now, you know docks are not like
railway works, for the men are nearly all at one place; here we were in
the middle of a large town, but you'll excuse my naming the place, I am
too polite to do such a thing without permission. No one was about at
dinner time, for all the chaps passed the gates. The place where my
work was was shut in nicely, and as there was always a row going on
from the traffic close by on road and river, and loading and unloading,
it was a really nice little home in which to do a bit of
engineering-up-to-date."
"I understand; a convenient spot for scientific experiments in saving
labour and the waste of good material."
"That's the lesson. I found dinner time was the best after a week's
scouting, and that the road was clear as daylight, for all the spies
were away, and there was only one that ever hung about, and he was a
young engineer just come to the docks straight from Westminster. He was
a nice sort of chap, and a smart one, and had the kind of face a girl
looks fond upon from what I have noticed of their tricks. Of course, he
did not know much of actual work, being a new pupil, I heard. By the
way, what a lot of pupils to be sure some engineers turn out. I almost
fancy a few of them must make as much from the schooling branch of the
profession as they do from work; but let them, it is nothing to do with
me, but this pupil I can say was no fool, though, the same as all new
hands, the work was a novelty to him, like a new toy to a child.
"Now, the only thing to interfere with the 'extra' business as
described was this pupil, so I decided to fix his attention, if I
could, in another direction, and sweetly, so thought it out, and said
to myself, 'You have had more difficult things to steer through than
this--rather hotter, I fancy.'
"It so happened, just then, they had pulled down an old tavern, and
built on the site a showy crib with balcony overlooking the river, and
they had a lot of relics on view, and two nicish girls were there. Good
figures, you know, and fairly on; so I made myself particularly
gracious to Mr. Pupil and pointed out, submissive to his superior
knowledge like, a few things on the work. Then the plot was let loose
this way. I started a kind expression on my face, and said--
"'I'm afraid you find it rather rough, sir, here; there are not the
nice feeding places they have in town, in fact, I think there is only
one near here, sir, at all fit for you.'"
"'Where is that?'
"'It is the Anchor and Hope Hotel, sir. I can hardly direct you to it;
but you have plenty of time to go there and get back fully a quarter of
an hour before the men's dinner time is over, if you will allow me to
show you the place, and they have almost a museum of relics of the
river.'
"The relics settled it, and he took on all right, and I knew then
things were working smoothly and the wind was getting round to a nice
steady breeze from the proper quarter. He was a good-natured chap, and
one could see liked inspecting the woman portion of creation better
than works, at least, during dinner-time, and I don't blame him; some
men are built that way, and can hardly say 'no' to a woman, for if they
do they think they have done wrong and been unkind. Poor things! Well,
we got to the place, and, fortunately, no one was in the private bar."
"You mean lobby. Don't insult the place."
"I humbly beg pardon.
"In we went, and it was lucky, for the better of the two girls was on
parade; they were nieces of the landlord, so had more latitude than
paid slaves. I went in first, and Mr. Pupil turned to me and said, 'I
will be with you in a minute.' Now, that was just what I wanted, a word
or two of priming for Polly. So after shaking hands with her, said:--
"'Polly, in a second or two a young swell will be here just new on the
works, and will be on the job to the finish, three years, so make
yourself pleasant as possible. Three years' presents and fun, to say
nothing of odd trips out, are not to be snuffed at; and he is rich they
tell me, and should be real good business all round, if you work him
right.'
"She laughed; and before I could say any more the door was on the move,
and in Mr. Pupil came. I kept my weather eye on him, for I can
generally tell, when they run young, whether a chap is smitten
sufficient. I saw the place would be a pleasant diversion, just seeing
one of the tender gender occasionally, after being all day among men;
so to make it appear I was a wolf on business, said, 'Please excuse me,
sir, but I have to meet a gentleman at half-past twelve.'
"'Certainly. Do not let me detain you.'
"I just turned to Polly, and said, 'Show this gentleman your museum of
relics, and the private room looking across the river, as I think it
may perhaps suit him for an odd lunch now and then.' Polly twigged.
"I saw they were started on the road of mutual admiration, and
travelling pretty, and that he meant calling again. She also seemed to
like the prospect, and knew how to work the game of fascination right,
and she did; so the only one in the way of preventing my doing a bit of
engineering-up-to-date with the pile-driving was now removed in a nice
harmonious way, and to the entire satisfaction of the company's
resident engineer--no, hardly that, I mean mine. I consider I did a
kind action to all parties, not excepting myself. What a blessing women
are, if you use them right. Mr. Pupil had his lunch at the place every
day, and Polly and he understood each other, and got on A 1, so I was
told. It is soothing work bringing happiness to two young hearts as
beat soft.
"_Next day we started cutting off the pile-heads_, while Polly and Mr.
Pupil were occasionally very likely pitching their heads together so
that I should not have all the fun. Well, we managed to so drive the
piles after a day or two as to be able to cut off, generally during
dinner time, from 2 to 4 feet, and I should think must have done over
200, when one day, just as we had nearly sawn one through, up turned
Mr. Pupil. Polly and her sister were visiting, and never told me they
were going, so the Anchor and Hope did not weigh-in much from him that
day. My ganger, who was doing the sawing trick with me, looked a bit
down, but he is not so educated as me; so I turned to Mr. Pupil and
said--as he asked me what I was doing, and what was the matter--'Got
the pile down wrong, sir, and shall have to lift it. I think it's
broken off, or gone ragged, may be it has struck an old anchor.'
"He just looked very hard at me, nodded, and went away. It was a close
shave, and lucky it was not the chief engineer. However, we had a
quarter of an hour to work on that pile before the men came back, and
we soon ruined it with bars and tackle. Anyhow, we raised it in no
time, for we had the best tackle and everything you could wish for. We
split the pile right across. It was only down 5 feet, and most of it in
mud. We quickly cut it up into cleats; and out of misfortunes, between
you and me, I always make as much as I can. So when Mr. Pupil returned
I said to him, 'It wants a lot of experience to know when piles are not
driving right, but 25 years has not been lost on me, sir, and I will
have good work or none.' Perhaps 'none' would have been the correct
word; but anyhow I used it coupled, and you can't complain, for if the
pile had been cut there would have been none in the place where it was
thought there was. We saved a lot of driving, and I said to myself, 'It
is lucky this bit of wharf wall is left to me pretty well, because, as
nearly most of the piles are a bit short, the wall may settle if they
load it much or build on it; still I think it will settle equally, and
then it won't matter so much, and they are not going to build on or
near it, that I know,' so I saved nearly 1000 feet of driving on the
lot; but here comes the shake. I forgot to say the piles were driven,
and a platform fixed on the top for the wall in the old style, but it
has gone out now, since Portland cement concrete came into fashion. One
day the engineer walked over the work with two or three directors, and,
after a lot of talk, they decided to build some 3-floor warehouses upon
the quay, after some figuring and dwelling on it. That made me think. I
heard someone say, 'The piles are 15 feet in the solid ground, and
therefore will safely bear the load.' So they would if they had been,
but not many hundreds of them were, and many were in 5 feet of little
better than mud, and as some had been cut off 4 feet, those piles were
only 6 feet in the solid ground. Understand, this wharf piling was only
the beginning of a long two or three years profit for me, and I knew
the warehouses would be sure to settle, and if they did unequally, over
would go the show. I always avoided the quay wall afterwards; it seemed
like a sort of spectre to me.
"One day the engineer sent for me to come to the office. Of course I
was there sharp. He said:--
"'I want you to tell me your idea of the character of the ground upon
which the western quay wall is erected?'
"Don't you think I was lucky, old pal? Here was my deliverance. It was
not exactly a path of roses--there are not many knocking about
now--because if I said it was soft ground he could reply, 'You had a
very high price for such driving.' If I said it was firm, I felt sure,
should they build a warehouse on it such as I heard them talk about, it
would sink or topple over, so I had to be careful how the ship was
sailed. I answered the engineer like this: 'If you'll excuse me talking
to you freely, sir, I will speak my mind; but I most feel abashed with
such as you, for you know a thousand times better than me.' He then
said to me:--
"'Be at your ease. I wish to hear exactly what you would do in the
matter if you were in my position. I have made up my mind; in fact, I
have already committed my views to writing.'
"'Thank you, sir. Well, sir, I think it is a risky place, although the
piles were many of them dreadfully hard to drive, and wanted a lot of
care and all had it, I think, judging from the variation in the depth
to which they went down under the same number of blows, that the ground
is a bit mixed, and therefore I should choose another site, as there is
plenty of room.'
"'Your opinion somewhat coincides with mine. Your idea, I may say, is
one which the configuration of the ground leads me to think is the case
without doubt. It is therefore probable that in a few days I may have a
considerable length of the quay loaded with rails, nearly 2000 tons
will arrive for the main and branch lines before the end of the week,
as I intend to load part of the quay with about 8 tons per square foot
in order to test it. In any case, much as I am urged to commence the
warehouses at once, I shall not do so until the quay has withstood the
test during at least a month.'
"'That is a heavy test, sir.'
"'You can go now!' He bowed, and smiled his thanks, and I withdrew. Of
course, I said nothing to anyone. It don't do to annoy the guv'nor.
Well, in a few days the rails came, about 2500 tons of them. The
engineer sent for me again and said, 'I wish you to see the rails
stacked on part of the quay in accordance with instructions you will
receive.'
"I could only say, 'Very well, sir,' and withdraw. I felt I was had
again, and went straight away and had a pull of rum. There was no help
for it now. I was in the fix and had to get out of it somehow, and what
made it doubly worse was being ordered to superintend my own ruin.
Listen, for you will when I tell you I might have been tried for having
killed or injured 400 men and one director! It was a near squeak for
the lot, and as it was--No! I'll tell you in a few minutes what
happened.
"Well, we stacked the rails over the place according to the engineer's
directions, after Mr. Pupil had taken the levels--he also took them
every day, to see how things were going. I made no remarks, for fear I
might say something that would lead to further enquiries, and took the
cue from a chap I once knew, the biggest rogue out he was; he could
please them pretty, and never had any fixed opinions about anything,
like some of our politicians, or could twist them about to suit the
times; and he set his sails according to circumstances, so as to be
pleasant to everyone, and was liked and respected by a lot that knew no
better and could not see through him, but he had not a bit of honesty
in him. Fact was, knowing I had got all I could out of short driving
and cutting off these piles, I played a mild game of respectful bluff,
more particularly as Mr. Pupil told me the ground had only gone down a
mere decimal of an inch.
"One day the engineer walked over by himself and said to me, 'Come to
the quay wall.'
"We got there, and I felt I had soft sawder enough in me for anything.
He led off by saying, 'Although this is a severe test it is not
altogether satisfactory to me. The rails shall remain in their present
position for at least another month. I have known, as in cylinder
sinking, subsidence to occur very suddenly and unexpectedly. I do not
like the system of foundations upon piles, but have been overruled
here.'
"Now what he said pleased me much, because I thought to myself if the
wall does break up it will not be exactly a heart-breaking trial to
him. Well, all went on as usual for a fortnight, and I heard nothing
further till one Friday about 5 o'clock. It was near low water, and Mr.
Pupil came to me and said the engineer wanted to see me. I went towards
the office, but on the way met him and the engineer and three or four
other swells, two of them that came before. I touched my hat, and
walked behind. I heard the engineer say, 'Mr. Selectus, although the
position is very good, I am not satisfied with regard to the
foundations, more especially as I believe the ground to be varied in
character; and on an old plan, dated 1720, I note a stream marked here;
in fact, Mr. Pupil has searched and found a water-course existed almost
from the earliest known times.'
"If he did not say exactly that, it was just like it, anyhow he spoke
up pretty straight. One of the directors (I heard they were all such
afterwards) said, addressing the engineer, 'I have an idea. The men
will cease work, I think, very soon?' 'They will,' said the engineer.
'Have you any objection to their marching and marking time, as it were,
upon the rails, as a final test, as I remember we so tested a
suspension bridge I had erected at my place?'
"The engineer assented, and remarked that although the weight of 500
men was not much compared to the weight of the rails, the vibration
they would create might cause a sudden subsidence. However, he slightly
bowed to the director, and said, 'I leave the experiment entirely to
you, although I may say it is not unattended with risk; for the test
load now imposed is a very severe one for such unstable soil, and the
effects of vibratory motion are usually most deleterious.'
"However, the director, after some talking, had his way, so the men
were fetched. We had about 700 at work then, the company's own men. I
will cut it short. Well, the director told the foreman, as the engineer
asked him to do so, what he wished to be done, and the men marched up
and down I should think six or seven times. It did not take long, and
they soon got into step, for we had a lot of militia chaps at work; and
then the director, who seemed to be enjoying himself, said, 'Now we
will try three trips, double quick,' so the men went by once all on the
smile, and we were as near laughing as smiling allows, when!----
"It chokes me to think of it. Fill up the glass, so that I may keep my
pipes open. Thank you, I was near being blocked up. Well, about half of
the men were behind the rails, and we were all, except the
director-in-command I'll call him, looking on and stationed on a mound
close by. I shouted out--seemed a sort of sudden impulse--
"'Look out! the ground is settling. Run for your lives.' About half of
the men heard me, and got away, but the front lot went on. I should
think 200 of them. Bless you, the ground began to yaw and sink with the
rails very quickly, and the wall pressed forward and toppled over in
one place for about a 30-feet length with men upon the top of it, and
the director as well, and fell very slowly, and quite majestically,
right into the river, and there was a splash and crash. I said before
it was nearly low water, and I should think there was about 5 feet on
the sill and 2 feet of mud. After all, somehow or other, only about
thirty men and the director were cast, and they were all taken out
right, for there was plenty of assistance. Still one man had his arm
broken, which was a good thing for him as it turned out, for the
director made him one of his lodge-keepers; but as he was a
smart-looking chap, and had been brought up right, and could not work
much after, it was an even bargain."
"How about the director?"
"Ah! that's the only fun we had; for I tell you, when I saw the men and
the wall go over it made me take root, and my boots were nearly pressed
into the ground, and they said I went awfully white in the face. It did
give me a shock; but it was lucky the break-up was so slow, for those
that could not get off had time to jump and get clear of the rails, but
I tell you it was a shave. As it turned out, the director had the worst
ducking of the lot that fell in. He went sprawling into the mud; but he
could swim, and when we saw him I nearly burst out laughing, only my
feelings had been so shaken, for he was smothered in slime from head to
foot, and looked like a real savage. All his hair, face, and beard were
thick with mud, to say nothing of his tailoring; and I tell you he put
me in mind of a baboon just then, and I don't think he will attempt any
more testing.
"Of course, the warehouses were not erected upon the quay, and the
engineer was not sorry at the way things had turned out. Anyhow, he let
me do the clearing away the rails and the rebuilding; and I drove in
the piles just the same length as the others, and nothing was said to
me or suspected. It worked all right; but suppose a lot of the men had
been killed, and the director as well! I tell you it was a near shave,
and all before my eyes. It would just have killed me; for I should have
known about another 3 feet down of those piles would have made them
stand all serene. As it was, my wife said I was that disturbed in my
sleep, and kicked so, that she hardly got a wink of rest, and had to
double herself up in bed for fear of having her legs broken; however,
it wore off in time, although once I sent myself and my old woman clean
off the bedstead, and I saw by the light of the moon we were sitting on
the floor, and the clothes were all of a heap close by. It made a nice
picture of domestic bliss. My wife gave it me hot, and she said she
would stand it no longer. I said, 'Don't grumble, you have not got to
stand. You are sitting down now, and you ought to know it.' She said
she heard me mumble several times in my sleep 'Cut 3 feet off her,
Bill!' That was my ganger's name, and, of course, my brain was alluding
to cutting off the piles; she thought it was her--no fear. Still, she
always makes out I was not so good as I once was, and she felt sure Old
Nick and me had night conversations. I laugh over the whole thing now.
I hardly did then."