CARDS.
There is only one visiting card in vogue for a man. It must be of plain
white bristol board, unglazed, about three or four inches in length and
about two inches in width. The name should be engraved, not printed, in
the middle of the card, in small copperplate type, without ornamentation
of any kind. The prefix "Mr." is always used unless the person is a
physician, in which case he can place "Dr." before his name, or a
clergyman, when he may use the "Rev. Mr." or the "Rev. Dr.," according
to his rank. Army and navy men, ranking as captain or above, should put
their rank on their cards. "Mr." is the prefix for subalterns. The
address is placed underneath the name in smaller type and in the
right-hand corner. If an address, however, is that of a man's club, it
should be engraved on the left hand. A man's card should also contain
his Christian as well as his surname. If he possesses two Christian
names, or any distinctive family name, that should also be given, so
that his appellation is shown in full. For instance, "Mr. John William
Jones," "Mr. James Brown Smith," "Mr. Hamilton Hamilton-Stuyvesant."
Visiting cards should be kept in a small case of sealskin or black or
Russia leather and carried in the inside pocket of a frock coat, or if
small enough more conveniently in the waistcoat pocket. Card cases
should be stamped with initials or have a silver monogram. Visiting
cards should never be carried loose in the pocket. A card is left in
person the day after a dinner, luncheon, or breakfast, or within a week
at latest after a ball. Civility must be returned by civility, and cards
must be left on every occasion on which a call is necessary. Cards
should not be sent by mail, unless when about to leave the country, or
under circumstances where it is impossible to make a personal call. On
leaving the country you should write the initials P. P. C. (_pour
prendre conge_) in the right-hand corner. In New York many men send
cards by mail, offering the excuse that the city is too large to get
about to make personal calls. This is only a flimsy pretext, and should
have no weight.
The question of how many cards to leave is one which seems to bewilder
most people. The general rule is a card to each person. This will have
to be explained. When you call on Mr. and Mrs. Smith you must leave a
card for each--two cards. When you call on Mr. and Mrs. Smith and the
Misses Smith, three cards, the young ladies counting as a unit. For Mr.
and Mrs. Smith, the Misses Smith, and their married daughter Mrs. Jones
staying with them, four cards--Mrs. Jones being entitled to the fourth.
If Mr. Jones is also stopping at the Smiths leave an extra card for him.
For Mrs. Smith (widow) and the Misses Smith, two cards. For Mr. Smith
(widower) and the Misses Smith, two cards.
In mailing cards, address them on the envelope "Mrs. Smith, the Misses
Smith," or "Mr. and Mrs. John Brown-Smith"; "The Misses Brown-Smith,"
the one under the other. Never write on your cards "For Mr. and Mrs.
John Brown-Smith." It is bad form. Never leave cards for people who have
not asked you to call. When friends from another city, who have
entertained you or who have been polite to you, should arrive in your
own city, you should immediately call and leave cards for them. In that
case, should you even not be acquainted with their host and hostess, it
would be civil to leave cards also for them.
After a wedding, if invited to the reception, you must personally leave
cards at the house where the reception has been given for your host and
hostess, and also for the young couple when they return from their
bridal trip. Two cards at each place will be sufficient in this case.
When invited to the church only, leave or send cards to the bride's
parents and the young couple. As the card to the church only, is rather
an equivocal compliment, mailing cards in this case could be excused.
Leave personally cards for the patroness who has asked you to a
subscription ball, within a week after the invitation. In cases of
death, leave cards within a fortnight. In answer to letters of
condolence, it is best to send your cards with the words "Thank you for
your kind sympathy" written thereon. For mourning, use the same size or
style of card, but with a narrow or deep border as befits the nearness
of degree of relationship with the deceased. The deepest border
permissible is about a quarter of an inch.
It is bad form to bend cards or to turn down the corners thereof. These
signs mean nothing now in good society. In calling--it may be repeated
here--you ask, if there are more than one of the fair sex in the house,
for "the ladies," and hand the servant the number of cards necessary. He
takes them on a silver salver and leaves them in the hall, goes before
you, and announces you. Your card is never taken to the lady of the
house, unless it is a business call.