Kingdom. But I have not forgot, _Tom_, nor I cannot yet forgive your
strange Rant of improving the very Climate in _Ireland_. If it was, I
wou'd not curse it, as _Harry_ the Eighth's Fool did the fine Weather,
for taking all the good Company abroad from him, but I shou'd rail at
it and you for another Cause; for fear of bringing us better Company
than I desire in _Ireland_. I must confess honestly, that our Winter
begins very late, and hardly appears till about the End of _December_,
and is gone before the beginning of _February_. But then it must be
own'd, that we have but very little Spring, unless it be of Grass and
Weeds; and that our Autumn lasts but very few Weeks, without any
Harvest to gather in, but a little pittance of Corn and some half made
Hay; and as for our Summers (as we call them) they come as it were by
Chance, now and then one, when _Spain_ and _Italy_ have done with them.
Nay, even then, we only get them, as Servants do their surfeited
Masters broken Meals; half hot, half cold, in little Scraps and Morsels
that do us no Good. In short, _Tom_, a Summer in _Ireland_ when it
wanders thither, is of as little Service as fair Weather in
_Greenland_, where nothing is the better for it, but vast Swamps and
Savannahs and a wild waste of Plains and Mountains, a few rational
Brutes that dwell in Caves and Holes of the Rocks, and a parcel of
Hares and Deers, which they live tollerably on, while they have Light
enough to hunt them. And to talk of mending our Climate, where nothing
but a general Conflagration can dry the Land, or purge the Dampness of
our unelastick Air, is as absurd as the Philosophers Sun-dial in the
Grave. Ah, _Tom_, I was always a very Atmospherical Creature; and often
have the Rains of _Ireland_ sunk my Spirits, and made me envy those
happy Climates, where the Natives toast in the Sunshine, till they
almost grow tir'd of it, and rejoice for Rain and bad Weather, like so
many Hackney Coachmen.
But as I hope you have done with all your mighty Reasons, for thinking
_Ireland_ on the mending hand, I expect you will indulge me now, while
I give you mine, why I think her in a very dangerous declining
Situation.
PRIOR. With all my Heart, provided you will allow me the Priviledge of
a free Conference, and bear with my opposing, whatever I think is wrong
in your Assertions, and let me canvass your Opinions where I want
Information or Proofs. I came to call on you, in order to Talk over all
that I thought dangerous or distressful, in our present Circumstances
and our future Prospects; and to consider what hope we can strike out
of Relief or Comfort, for this neglected People and Country; and I
promise before hand, I shall not contradict you in any Thing, where you
do not force me to it, by an over-bearing Zeal, or a querulous Temper.
SWIFT. A fair Preliminary, to which I readily Subscribe. Now the first
Reason, _Tom_, why I have uneasy fears for our Country, and for my
having little Expectation of mending her Circumstances is, the utter
absence of all Industry and Frugality among us. There is no other
Remedy for a thoughtless Nation, which gets little or nothing from
others, but saving all it can; and being frugal in proportion to its
Indolence and Poverty. This is a self-evident Truth, and yet our
Nobility and Gentry spend in Vanity and Luxury, treble as much as Men
of twice their Fortune in _England_, tho' they do not half the Good
among their Tenants, and neither spend half the Time or Money with
them, or take half the pains to improve them, while they every Year
encrease their Rents, and our Beggars: 'Tis dismal to make the poor
Tenant give the full Tale of Brick, tho' we give them no Straw, and
that we starve them, by sending our Money abroad for foreign
Commodities, to feed our Extravagance, and gratify our Madness for
importing Fopperies; tho' we hurt our Families for the present, and
ruin our Poor for ever, who dare not set up Manufactures they know will
not be worn. Surely in a Kingdom where no body looks to his own
Affairs, as they are connected with the Publick, 'tis Time the Publick
shou'd look to every Bodies. What a melancholy Prospect is it, to see
fine Cloaths, fine Equipages, fine Race Horses, fine Laces, fine
Dishes, deep Play and deep Drinking, the Glory and delight of our
People of Fashion; and Ease, and Sloth, and Sleep, and Potatoes, the
chief Joy of our Lifeless neglected Natives. Is not such a Nation like
a Ship set on Fire on one end, and sinking by a thousand Shot-holes and
Leaks, at the other? If we were a little frugal, we might the better
bear the Loss we undergo by our Idleness and Inactivity; but when our
Gentlemen sacrifice so much to their Pleasures, and our Ladies to their
Finery, both which they wisely seek for from foreign Productions, we
must be undone unless we prevent our Destruction, by resolving to Work
and be busy. There is no Alternative----, one of these two Things we
must do; we must either be less Mad for the Manufactures and Products
of other Nations, or we must enlarge our Industry, and make Reprisals
thereby on our Neighbours, in order to keep our People alive and easy
while they are Living. Possibly I may have said this before, _Tom_, and
probably I shall say it again, for a full Heart and a troubled Mind, is
apt to deal in Repetitions, when they grow almost desperate, and see
little hope of a Change for the better.
PRIOR. Dear _Dean_, I own I shou'd be glad to contradict you, as to
these dismal Representations of Things; but I have learn'd since I left
a false World, to love Truth, tho' it be ever so strong against us, or
puts us and our Actions in ever so bad a Light. It is too certain
Industry and Frugality are the two great Sources of Prosperity in all
Nations; and it is a mortifying Reflection to consider what a miserable
Share we have in either of them here. 'Tis as certain if we be Frugal
and Industrious, we must be easy and happy, as that we must be wretched
and miserable, if we continue our Love to Expence and our hatred to
Labour. Nay Frugality and Wealth, which is the Consequence of it, will
not do, unless we are diligent Workers too; for _Spain_ is a Proof, and
so is _Portugal_, that even Hoards of Money will not enrich a Nation,
unless their Gold is used to promote Industry among the meaner Sort,
and to raise their Thoughts above Sleep, and Rags, and Dirt, and
Inactivity.
SWIFT. Very true, _Tom_, and indeed one wou'd hope unless Heaven has
irrecoverably doom'd us to Destruction, there are sufficient Remains of
common Sense and Honesty left among our Countrymen, to new form our
Manners in these Regards, and improve their ways of Thinking and
Acting. In such Case, they may in two or three Centuries learn to
believe, Frugality and Industry, Arts and Manufactures worth
encouraging, and their Luxury and Debauchery, and an utter Absence of
all Regard to the Publick, worth Reforming. It is a shocking Truth to
say all this wou'd be done, if Men wou'd but own themselves oblig'd,
and wou'd therefore resolve to behave, like reasonable Creatures: And
yet this is a Point as hard to bring about, as if we were arguing with
_Hottentots_, and persuading _Tartars_ to forbear publick Plunders, and
to have some regard to Right and Wrong, and the real Happiness and
Misery of themselves and their Posterity.
PRIOR. I agree with you entirely, Mr. _Dean_, and indeed if we cou'd
cure our national Ailments by Writing and Speaking, as People who
profess removing Disorders, by Words and Charms, what you and I and
some others have Publish'd, might have done the Work: But alas!
pressing Industry and Frugality on many of our People, who have been
train'd up to Sloth and Squandering, is but of equal Efficacy with
preaching up Temperance to Sots, or Cleanliness to Negroes, when their
Habits and Vices are all against you. The Church of _Rome_ has plac'd
_Purgatory_ in the North-West of _Ireland_, which was then one of the
remotest wildest Parts of the Earth; and tho' I have reason to believe,
they now Wish, they had removed it something more out of View, yet I am
sure there is no Part of the Globe, so fit a _Purgatory_ for Sloth as
_Ireland_, or where People so generally pay St. _Paul_'s Penalty for
not Working, by not Eating.
SWIFT. If due Care was taken, this natural Supineness of our lower
People, might be soon turn'd into Activity and Vivacity, by letting
them see and feel the Sweets of Labour, and convincing them by Fact and
Experience, that when once the Poor are made industrious, they turn all
they Touch to Gold, like _Midas_'s Fingers of famous Memory. As to our
sleepy Countrymen, I cannot but say that it is a Pity, where Men are
commanded to give one Day of the Week, to doing nothing but Acts of
Piety, they don't regard the other Part of the Law, and labour the
other Six. This at least shou'd be the Magistrate's, and the human
Legislator's Business; but really there is no Law made, nor Care taken
about it, but every Body overlooks this plain neglected Truth, that Men
ought to be as accountable to the Magistrate, for their Time as their
Actions, and as punishable for wasting it. But our _Irish_ seem
actually to have mistaken the divine Commandment, and it is well their
Priests did not leave it out of the Decalogue, as they did the Second.
They manage, as if they thought God had bid them be idle six Days of
the Week, and Work but one, and very moderately on that one. I have
often met in Authors, and think the Assertion true, that the very
Genius of the Popish Religion indisposes Men to Labour; as we see by
their numerous Holidays, Feasts and Fasts: All which are direct Enemies
to Toil and Handy-craft, and make the returns to Work disagreeable. It
is undoubted that the Protestants out Trade and out Work the Papists;
they have (as all observe) fewer Beggars, they have fewer Drains from
their Industry, by those who sleep away their Lives in Colleges and
Nunneries; they maintain a much smaller Number of secular Priests, and
even to those, they do not prohibit Marriage, and to say no more at
present, those lazy Drones the Friars of so many different Orders, are
Cankers and Consumptions quite unknown to their Constitution. In most
Protestant Countries, more than ordinary Attention, for good political
Reasons, has been given to this great Point. In _Holland_ all are
employ'd, even the lettred World deal in Traffick and are Merchants;
nay the Deaf, the Lame, the Blind, the Dumb, and the very Dead Work.
PRIOR. The Dead Work! That is a Flight extraordinary sure, Mr. _Dean_,
and I must call on you to retract that Mistake.
SWIFT. Not at all; for tho' that Truth is a little incomprehensible in
_Ireland_, where we have no such Incitements, in _Holland_ the Statues
and Monuments of their useful and industrious Citizens, and the
Epitaphs and Praises on them, prompt and inflame the living to emulate
them, and push on their Virtue to excell, in every Art, and open every
Road to Profit and to Glory. When I was throwing away (like other
People) my Thoughts and my Time above Ground, I used often to think on
these Matters; and I fear to as little Purpose as we talk of them now.
However I must say, _Tom_, that tho' if our rich People would think and
grow Managers, and our Poor wou'd Work, and keep their Hands and their
Children busy, nine tenths of our Evils wou'd be remov'd, yet I am
convinc'd, neither of these important Points will be minded, till we
are forc'd to get better Notions of Things, by seeing the Nation ruin'd
by the want of them, as often as a Boy at School is whipt for playing
the Truant, before he will mend.
PRIOR. Ruin is as terrible a Remedy, as a deadly Sickness is a
Reformer; and I had rather hope that sumptuary Laws against Dress,
Racing, Gaming, _&c._ if we were Wise enough to make them, and
amendable enough to mind them when made, wou'd do our Business much
better. 'Tis a Misfortune for _Ireland_, that our Spendthrifts so often
run out their Lives and their Estates together, and so their Examples
are lost on us; for I ever thought it a Pity, they shou'd not live
forty or fifty Years in beggary, their own Lives are such a Torment to
them, and they become thereby such fine Scare-crows, to our young
unthinking Squanderers, when they see them all the while, standing as
it were in a kind of Pillory. Nothing keeps the _Dutch_ so frugal as
their Loads of high Taxes, for some good Author, (and I think 'tis your
old Friend Sir _William Temple_) tells us, one cannot have a Dish of
well dressed Fish at a Tavern in _Holland_, without paying near thirty
Gabels for it. We want some Remedy for our Extravagancies of all Kinds
greatly, but this is so shocking a one, that one wou'd hope the very
fear of it might cure us, as some Men have renounc'd their
Intemperance, by their dread of the Gout and the Doctor. Without some
such helps, our fine Gentlemen seem not inclined to learn or consider,
that we shou'd save immense Sums to our Country, if we eat Corn of our
own sowing, drunk home-made Wines of our own Brewing, fed on Fish of
our own catching, burn'd Coals of our own raising, and wore no Cloaths
that were not of our own manufacturing. If they were once convinced of
this, good Effects wou'd follow, and we shou'd soon acknowledge that it
is barely owing to our own Extravagance, Thoughtlesness, Sleepiness,
Drunkenness and Vanity, that we don't, with one Voice, condemn and
renounce such evident Errors, in our national Conduct, and fix on their
Remedies.
SWIFT. This _Tom_, is merely dreaming of a publick Cure for an
epidemical Distemper, as _Curtius_ says _Ptolomy_ did; but we shou'd
not only get our Gentlemen, to think for the Nation and themselves; for
we want severe Laws to cure the Laziness and Indolence of our lower
People. As Idleness is the great Source of Theft, picking and filching,
the natural Punishment of at least all smaller Criminals, seems to be
hard Labour for Life, or Years. We see in _France_ and _Spain_ they man
their Gallies this way, and in _Sweden_ and _Denmark_ they employ them
in their publick Works, and chiefly about their Shipping and their
Docks. No Punishment cou'd be more terrifying to an _Irishman_, who we
generally think is averse to Labour; none cou'd be more useful to our
distressed Land, where we lose more People by doing Nothing, than are
destroy'd by the Wars and Conquests, the Voyages and Traffick of other
Kingdoms. On this Account we shou'd take Care, that Idlers, Beggars and
vagabond Strollers, shou'd be treated with the Sharpest Rigour, as they
do not only deny to assist their Country by their honest Endeavours,
but live like Drones on the Spoil of the Industrious. It shou'd be a
Maxim in every well governed State, but especially in _Ireland_, that
Idleness shou'd be as severely punish'd as petty Larceny; and to beg
with an Ability to Work, shou'd be regarded and treated as a Kind of
training up Youth for Stealing, (when they have learn'd the proper Cant
and Tricks of their Apprenticeship) and consequently to relieve a
Vagabond, shou'd be as faulty and as corrigible as receiving stolen
Goods. The proper Place for the Relief of sturdy Beggars, is a good
County Work-house, where the Labours of such Vagabonds (and indeed of
all Criminals till they are Tried and Discharg'd) shou'd go to the
Maintainance of such Poor, who are utterly incapable of Work, and whose
Parishes can't support them.
PRIOR. I am quite in your way of Thinking on this Subject, Mr. _Dean_,
I remember Doctor _Basire_ in his Life of Bishop _Cosin_, tells us that
in several Years Travels in _Turky_ and _Holland_, he never once met a
Man who ask'd him an Alms; so that here we see the Wisdom of the State
may have the same Effect with the Laws of God among the _Jews_, which
prohibited any Beggar to be a Burthen, or a Disgrace to their Tribes.
Charity to Vagabonds is Cruelty to the State, which is interested as
the Civil Law, and our own Statutes speak, that every Member of the
Community, should use his Labour and his Substance, to the best
Advantage. Every Stroller or Vagabond is a Loss to the Kingdom, and is
little better than a licenc'd Plunderer of our People, and every such
Person, is really a living Instance of Neglect or Ignorance in those,
who shou'd give us by Law a proper Power and Place, to force him to
earn his Bread by his Hands. Whoever has Health and wants Food, shou'd
be oblig'd to Work one way or other, for if Idleness was always
punish'd by our Statutes with severe Labour, as surely as Felony is by
Death, it would then like Thieving be confin'd to the Night, and we
shou'd be at least good Day Labourers. The Strength of the political
Body, depends as much on its Members being properly exercised, as that
of the natural, and on the Neglect of it, infinite Disorders follow.
But alas, _Dean_, this is not enough attended to in _Ireland_, or we
shou'd have Work-Houses in every County, but we have the peculiar
Misfortune of having this dreadful Mixture in our Circumstances; that
we have all the Vices, Extravagancies, and Luxury of a rich Nation,
with all the Wants, the Distresses and Despair of a poor one. If once
our Gentry and Nobility wou'd set us fair Examples of Frugality and
Activity, we shou'd soon reform, but alas! great Estates, as we use
them, seem design'd for little else but the Triflers of the World, and
the wretched Fashions, Fopperies and Fooleries, they are generally
thrown away on. However it is certain, Providence appointed them for
nobler Purposes, and it were to be wish'd the present Stewards of them
(for they are evidently nothing more) wou'd seriously consider this,
that they may be able to give the Bestower a better Account of them.
SWIFT. I was saying so every Day, for the last fifty Years of my
Slavery among Men, and all to no Purpose! But there is another Matter
that makes me fear for the Welfare of _Ireland_, and that is the want
of proper Manufactures being set up there. I see _Tom_, you are ready
to bawl out to me, the _Irish_ Cambricks, the _Irish_ Linens, but alas!
even as to them I am sorry to say, they wou'd do _Great Britain_ and
_Ireland_ twice the Service, if they were doubly encouraged, and not
left to creep to those Provinces, where they might go with a brisker
Progress, if the Funds of the Trustees were enlarg'd, or their Premiums
more happily applied. But I leave that, _Tom_, to Time and the
Legislature, for the Manufactures which I lament the want of, are those
which enrich _France_, _Germany_ and _Holland_; such as those of Brass,
Tin, Copper, Lead and Iron Work, in all their amazing Species; those of
Glass, Tapestry, Hats, Silk, Leather, Paper, Pins, Needles, Lace,
Earthen-Ware, and Numbers of others, of which our own Island can
largely supply the Materials, if we wou'd make use of them. Whether it
proceeds from our Ignorance or our Poverty, our before mentioned
Laziness, or want of Capacity I cannot say; but Arts and Manufactures
seem to be discourag'd so remarkably, in this unthinking and unthought
of Island, as if we wou'd fain obtain the Name, of _Omnium bonarum
Artium noverca_, formerly as I remember given to _Scythia_. Even those
few Attempts we make to deserve well in some of them, are brow-beaten
or neglected by our People of Fashion. This is a Complaint I must often
make, and can never be too often repeated in their Ears, as without
their Help no Workmen, how industrious soever, can thrive. 'Tis
miserable that our polite People, will not be content to Ruin their own
Families by their extravagant Finery, but their Country too, and all
who dare endeavour to exert a little Industry in home Manufactures.
Surely the Wearers of all Foreign Goods, and especially the Fair Sex,
do not believe, or do not consider, that they deliberately starve their
own poor Countrymen and their Families, by making them Work in vain.
They shou'd in Pity, in Generosity, in Justice reflect, that since we
are not allowed to Export our Silk and Woollen Goods abroad, the least
that every Friend to _Ireland_ can do, is to encourage them so far, as
to wear them at Home, tho' they do not quite come up to those that are
Imported to us. Tho' we are terribly impoverish'd by this fondness for
Goods which other Nations send us, it is still some Comfort, that there
is no Law to force us to it as yet, and that the whole of this dreadful
Ruin, is grounded on our own Humours, which a little thinking, some
Charity, and a general Poverty, may remove in Time. I know no reason,
why a Thousand beautiful Faces I have seen in _Ireland_, shou'd desire
to look lovelier than Nature, and the Produce of their native Kingdom
can make them: And for our Gentlemen (if they are Gentlemen) they
shou'd take a Pride in wearing nothing but what is wrought in _Irish_
Looms, and make it a Case of Conscience, like Archbishop _King_, Bishop
_Berkeley_, and Crowds of Patriots I cou'd Name, to be cloathed by our
own People. The _Dutch_ I am told, have lately issued a Placart,
forbidding all their Subjects (excepting Day-Labourers who are too poor
to trangress it) to wear any Silk or Woollen Goods not Fabricated in
their Provinces. The greatest Personages are restrain'd herein by
severe Penalties, and tho' we cannot make such a Law, (nor perhaps
shou'd not desire it in Respect to one Country at least) yet certainly
we shou'd form general Resolutions, and try to Establish an universal
Custom (which is equal to any Law) of Feeding and Encouraging our own
Workmen and Tradesmen.
PRIOR. Laws, Mr. _Dean_, are not so much wanting, as the Will to favour
our own Goods, and our own People; and surely as you observe, all who
please, may determine in their several Families, to use the Produce of
our _Irish_ Looms; and in the mean Time I cannot but make this sad
Reflection, that if Industry and Labour be the great Standard of Value
in most Things, what (under such Discouragements) can our unemploy'd
Country be worth, which except our Linens, sends abroad all the
Materials for Labour to others, and lies abed like a _Spaniard_,
burning Day-Light, and proud of doing Nothing.
SWIFT. I remember to have Read, when I used to lose Time upon Men and
Books, that among the _Turks_, every Man of them learns some Trade or
other. This Fashion they probably borrow'd from the _Jews_, who made it
a Maxim, that he who does not give his Son a Trade, teaches him to be a
Thief: And yet till our Protestants Taught the _Irish_ better Manners,
a Trade was as seldom learn'd as a Psalter. It is true of late Years
this Folly has been pretty much subdued, and Numbers of our Natives
have distinguish'd themselves, by their Skill in different Arts and
Handicrafts, but till this Humour wears off, of slighting whatever is
wrought at Home, it were better they had learn'd to Fast than to Work.
We keep Crowds of our Artificers naked who well-deserve to be cloathed;
many are as ill hutted as so many _Greenlanders_ or _Russian_ Peasants,
who ought to be well housed, if any one thought them worth taking Care
of and Encouraging. But what is still more unhappy, Thousands of them
are forced for fear of Jails and Beggary, to run from us to wiser
Countries, where they and their Arts are well receiv'd and favour'd by
our Enemies or Rivals, whose Industry and Exports they Encrease, and
thereby help to Starve the Friends they have forsaken. One wou'd expect
common Charity to them and ourselves, and common Sense in conducting
our general Interests, wou'd not only have remov'd this main Obstacle
to the Prosperity of _Ireland_, but wou'd also put us on setting up all
Kinds of new Manufactures, which we still want; let it cost us ever so
much for setling them here, and Nursing them till they get Strength, to
shift for themselves. It is certain the Publick can hardly pay too dear
for such improveable Purchases, for unquestionably where the Advantages
are so considerable, saving in such Cases is meanness and madness.
PRIOR. You are ever Tolling the passing Bell of _Ireland_, and yet my
fears that there is too much Reason for all you advance, keep me from
opposing you; when you censure the Stupidity of our Management, in
regard of every Measure that can hurt us or serve us. I spent half my
Life in exclaiming in the same Manner, and I might as well have spoke
to the Inhabitants of these Tombstones. There is one Particular, which
with Grief I must add to all your Complaints, and it is a very
discouraging one as to any Hopes of our Recovery, namely, that this
Island is made up of two of the most unhappy Mixtures a Kingdom can
consist of, a Multitude of Gentlemen and Beggars. The first have not
Time from their Pleasures, and their own petty Interests, to think of
serving us, and the others cannot either serve themselves or us,
without Wages, Food or Raiment, which they cannot get, unless we allow
them to Purchase them by their Labours. In short, Mr. _Dean_, while our
Ladies scorn to wear any Thing that is _Irish_, and our Gentlemen pride
themselves who shall Drink most _French_ Wine; they both Teach their
Inferiors the same dreadful Folly, and make them join to enrich their
Enemies, Beggar their own Workmen, exalt _France_, and sink _Ireland_,
and drive every Creature that has Genius or Industry out of it, to
Places as we observed before, where they can hope to get the
Necessaries of Life by their Industry.