affectionately commend to your consideration: 1, The wife acted in
accordance with 1 Peter iii. 1. She kept her place as being in subjection,
and the Lord owned it. 2, She reproached not her husband, but meekly and
kindly served him when he used to come home. 3, She did not allow the
servants to sit up for their master, but sat up herself; thus honouring
him as her head and superior, and concealed also, as far as she was able,
her husband's shame from the servants. 4, In all probability a part of
those hours, during which she had to sit up, was spent in prayer for her
husband, or in reading the word of God, to gather fresh strength for all
the trials connected with her position. But whether this was the case or
not, it is certain that thus, under similar circumstances, the time might
be spent, and it would then indeed be spent profitably. 5, Be not
discouraged if you have to suffer from unconverted relatives. Perhaps very
shortly the Lord may give you the desire of your heart, and answer your
prayer for them; but in the meantime seek to commend the truth, not by
reproaching them on account of their behaviour towards you, but by
manifesting towards them the meekness, gentleness, and kindness of the
Lord Jesus Christ.
March 25. Tubingen in Wirtemberg. The day before yesterday I left Basle
in the afternoon. The Lord enabled me to confess Him before a young man
and his wife, who were going to Vienna to increase their riches. What a
mercy that grace has made me to differ, and that I travel the service of
another master! They listened very attentively, and were not at all
opposed. They also esteem the people of God, and have been in the habit of
meeting with them. Our parting was very affectionate and solemn, after I
had charged them to care earnestly about the one thing needful.
I arrived, yesterday morning at six, at Schaffhausen. I found a brother
waiting for me at the post office, a gentleman of title, who, having been
informed by brethren at Basle of my arrival, kindly took me to his house
for the two hours I had to stay in that town, to refresh my body with
breakfast, and my soul with communion with the brethren whom he had
invited to meet me. I was in this town about ten years ago. I was now
again within a short distance of the fall of the Rhine, which was then
most attractive to me. Now I considered that my time could be spent much
more profitably than by going there. The little time that I was at
Schaffhausen, I received much information concerning the state of the
church in many parts of the Continent, from a believing physician and a
clergyman; and I also communicated things which, with God's blessing, may
be profitable. After this I continued my journey to Tubingen. It was with
peculiar feelings; for all this way I had traversed nearly ten years ago,
to gratify my natural desire for travelling, and now I went over the same
ground in the service of the Lord Jesus.
I arrived here this morning at nine, having been strengthened to travel
two nights and a day and a half, though I left Basle very weak. This
morning I saw brother Gundert, the student of divinity, on whose account I
am here, and spent about three hours in conversation with him. Afterwards
I called on a Christian professor in the university, who received me
kindly. This evening I had a meeting with the believing students, for whom
the Lord gave me a word.
March 26. This morning I drove with brother Gundert to Stuttgart, both
for the sake of seeing more of him, and also that we might unitedly talk
over the matter with his father, who lives there. I am now staying at the
house of brother Gundert senior, where I am kindly lodged. I think brother
Gundert junior, will go to the East Indies. His father is not only willing
to give him up for the Lord's sake, but seems to consider it an honour to
have a son to give to the Lord in this way. This evening I again met
several brethren, to whom I spoke about the things of God.
March 30. Halle. From the evening of the 27th till this afternoon, when I
arrived here, I have traveled day and night, and have been strengthened by
the Lord for it. The whole of this way, several hundred miles, I had gone
step by step before. My thoughts were peculiarly affecting, as I retraced
the mercies which I had experienced at the hands of God.--The Lord enabled
me repeatedly to confess His name before my changing fellow-travelers. A
student spoke to me about the peculiarly good and cheap wine of Weinheim,
near Heidelberg. I told him that when, years ago, as a student like
himself, I came through that place, I cared about such things, but that
now I knew what was much better than wine.--Yesterday a Frenchman, having
heard my testimony for Jesus once or twice, when the last merry companion
had left the coach, quitted my society, it being too dull for him, and
joined himself to an officer in the army, sitting in the forepart of the
coach. (The coach was divided into the forepart and inside.) This gave me
a blessed and most refreshing opportunity to pray for about an hour aloud
in the coach, which strengthened and refreshed my soul. It was
particularly kind of the Lord to give me an opportunity of praying aloud,
as, on account of having then already traveled forty-eight hours
uninterruptedly, my body was too tired to allow me to continue for any
length of time in mental prayer.--Yesterday afternoon, at Eisenach
(situated just under the hill on which stands the decayed castle called
the Wartburg, where Luther translated the Holy Scriptures), I saw fearful
scenes of profanity. How has the candlestick been removed!--This afternoon
I reached Halle, where it pleased the Lord to bring me to the knowledge of
Himself, having been graciously preserved hitherto, though a spring was
found broken when I got out of the mail. I greatly needed rest, but my
heart was too full. I could not sleep. I went first to the house of the
brother, where I was first impressed, and afterwards I called on my
esteemed tutor, professor Dr. Tholuck, counsellor of the Consistory, who
received me, after seven years' separation, with his former kindness and
brotherly love. (He made me lodge with him, and gave thereby a testimony
that differences of views, concerning certain parts of God's truth, ought
not to separate the children of God; for I had written to him my mind from
Bristol two years before.)
March 31. Today I rode with Dr. Tholuck and two young brethren to a
believing clergyman, living in the neighbourhood of Halle, where we spent
the day. Dr. Tholuck told me many encouraging things, particularly this,
that several of my former fellow-students, who, at the time when I was at
Halle, knew not the Lord, had been brought to know Him since, and are now
labouring in His vineyard. And further, that certain brethren, formerly
very weak in the faith, had been established, and are now going on well.
May this encourage the heart of the believing reader still to pray for his
unconverted friends, and may it strengthen him to hope for better days
concerning those of his brethren in the Lord who are now weak in the faith!
April 1. Today I saw a clergyman, in whom I recognized an individual who
studied at Halle, whilst I was there, living then in open sin, and who is
now, by divine mercy, pointing sinners to the Lamb of God. In the evening
I went to the large Orphan-house, built, in dependence on the Lord, by A.
H. Franke, to see one of the classical teachers, who is the son of my
father's neighbour, and whom I had not seen for about fifteen years. I
found him, to the joy of my heart, to be a brother in the Lord. This
evening I spent in the same room where it pleased the Lord to begin a work
of grace in my heart, with several of the same brethren and sisters with
whom I used to meet seven years ago, and told them of the Lord's
faithfulness, gentleness, kindness, and forbearance towards me, since I
had seen them last. Truly how good has the Lord been to me since!
April 2. This morning I again spent in calling on the brethren and
sisters, being enabled, every where, before learned and unlearned, to
testify about the blessedness of adhering to the Scriptures as our only
guide in spiritual things. I left Halle this afternoon, having received
much love from the brethren, and drove fifteen miles further, to a beloved
brother and old friend, brother Stahlschmidt at Sandersleben, who has
shown me much kindness even since I have been in England. I was received
with much love by this brother and his dear wife, and his man servant,
also a beloved brother. [This brother (the man servant) I met fifty-four
years ago at Gnadau, a Moravian settlement, where I several times spent a
few days for the refreshment of my soul, to which place he also came, a
distance of about forty-five miles, for the same purpose. He was then
living with a farmer, ploughing his fields, &c. At that time our hearts
were knit together; for I wish it to be understood by any unconverted
reader, that, whilst I should at one time have looked with scorn upon such
a person, if he had attempted to be familiar with me, now the love of
Jesus, in whom we were one, filled my heart with love to him, and these
outward distinctions were broken down. In consequence of this
acquaintance, he wrote me several letters to Halle, and I wrote to him.
Those letters were particularly refreshing and spiritual, and therefore I
read them to other brethren, and also to brother Stahlschmidt, a wine
merchant. On account of this, he had a great desire to have brother Kroll
living in his house. The Lord, after a time, brought it about, and this
brother lived with him above forty years, and was a friend, a brother, and
a most faithful servant to this merchant, so that his considerable
business was in a great measure intrusted to him; and yet he treated his
master with all due respect, and kept his place as a servant. This latter
point is very important, and brings glory to God. For whilst a believing
master should treat a believing servant with all kindness and brotherly
love; yet the believing servant should with all obedience, with all
faithfulness, and particularly with due respect, treat his believing
master or mistress.]
April 3. Sandersleben. Today I saw several brethren and sisters, and
among others a brother, who is in about the same state in which he was
eight years ago. He has very little enjoyment, and makes no progress in
the things of God. The reason is, that, against his conscience, he remains
in a calling, which is opposed to the profession of a believer. We are
exhorted in Scripture to abide in our calling; but only if we can abide in
it "with God." 1 Cor. vii. 24.--This evening a believing clergyman, and the
brethren and sisters of this small town and some neighbouring villages,
were collected together in brother Stahlschmidt's house, and I spoke to
them for two hours about the things of God, particularly about the way in
which God has led me, since I saw them, and sought to strengthen their
hands in God, and exhorted them to give themselves fully to the Lord. It
was a time of refreshing. Indeed, the Lord has greatly refreshed my own
soul, at Basle, Tubingen, Stuttgart, Halle, and elsewhere, whenever I have
spoken well of His name. The child of God should make it his particular
business to encourage sinners to seek after the Lord, and to increase the
faith and love of the brethren, through speaking well of the name of the
Lord.
April 4. I left Sandersleben this morning. My brother and host acted
according to 3 John, 5 and 6; for he sent me on ten miles in his carriage.
When I arrived at Aschersleben, to which place brother Stahlschmidt had
conveyed me, I had but one station more to my father's house. On the way I
asked the driver about a certain individual, with whom I studied at Halle,
once a companion with me in open sin. I found that he is still in the same
state. What a difference has grace made between him and me! Nothing,
nothing but grace has made this difference! I, guilty sinner, might now be
still on the same road, and he, in my room, might have been plucked as a
brand out of the fire. But it is not so. May the Lord help me to love him
much, very much, for His distinguishing grace!--Such feelings I had in
particular this afternoon, when I saw the town before me in which my
father lives, as there are but two in the whole place, as far as I can
find out, who love the Lord. How different is everything with me now from
what it was when, as a wicked youth, I used to go to this town, at the
time of my vacation. How truly happy am I now! How is my heart now raised
above all those things in which I sought, and also fancied I found
happiness! Truly all these things are like bubbles to me now! My heart is
not here; yea, my heart is not even in England. My heart is, at least in a
measure, in heaven, though I am still nothing but a poor weak worm. I felt
the solemnity and importance of having once more the privilege of seeing
my aged father. I also felt the importance of being at the place, where I
had spent much of my time in my youth, and where I had been known as
living in sin. My desire was, that I might be enabled to walk, the three
days I intended to stay there, as it becomes a servant of Christ. For this
I had been led to prayer before I left Bristol, and since I have been on
the Continent. At last I arrived at my father's house. How affecting to
meet him once more!
April 5. Heimersleben. This afternoon a friend of my father called-one
who knows not the Lord. After a few minutes the Lord gave me an
opportunity of setting before him the fundamental truths of the Gospel,
and the joy and comfort they afford, and have afforded to me. Thus a way
was opened to me of stating the truth more fully than ever I had been able
to do before, by word of mouth, in the presence of my father and brother,
without saying to them, "Thou art the man." I was assisted by the Lord.
May He water the seed sown! This evening I went to the only two brethren
in this little town, thus to own them as such. It has appeared well to me
to call on none whom I know, else I should be expected to call on all; and
as I see it right to spend but three days here, I consider that that
little time should be wholly given to my father, as it may be the last
time that I shall see him; yet, at the same time, I judged that it was
well pleasing in the sight of the Lord, that I should call on these
brethren to strengthen their hands.
When I saw these brethren last, in February, 1829, two or three more used
to meet with them; but since then the reproach of the cross has driven the
others back into the world. From that time, these brethren have scarcely
seen a believer, and never hear the Gospel preached; it was therefore a
great joy to them to see me. They told me that the Lord had blessed my
last visit to them; and having been informed of my coming, they were
prepared to ask me many questions. One of them, Knabe, about thirty years
ago being possessed of property, was persuaded to lay it out in coal
mines. He joined with two men who spent his property, and after some time
they became bankrupts, so that there was not money enough to pay the
workmen and some other creditors, even after all their goods had been
sold. This evening brother Knabe asked me what he ought to do about the
money which had been left unpaid three and twenty years; whether he was
still under an obligation to pay it, if he could. My answer was at once
that he was, being in the sight of the Lord still a debtor, though cleared
by the laws of men. He then told me, that some years since some property
was left to him, and that he also, in the years 1816, 1817, and 1818, when
the corn prices were very high, had laid by some money, and that therefore
he was fully able to pay the debt. He saw immediately that this was the
right way, and said that he would act accordingly. He added that now he
saw why he had made so little progress in divine things. I have learned
that this brother has lately taken two destitute orphans into his house,
whom he entirely supports by the labour of his hands (he earns his bread
by thrashing corn), and that the people, though they consider him, on
account of his love for the Lord, a weak and foolish person, yet look upon
him with respect.
April 6. I spent this morning in answering questions which my father put
to me about secular things in England. This I did for the following
reasons:--1. I had scarcely ever spoken about these things in my letters,
indeed so little, that my father told me, he had often intended to ask me
whether it was forbidden in England to send letters abroad about such
matters, as I never wrote about them. I had refrained from doing so,
partly, on account of want of time; and, partly, because I had better
things to write about, wishing to direct his mind to the things of God. 2.
Now, however, I spoke on these subjects, because I particularly desired to
be as kind, affectionate, and obliging as I conscientiously could,
considering that this was the testimony I was especially called on to
give. Formerly I had much pressed the things of God on him, and not with
sufficient tenderness, knowing not then experimentally the helplessness of
the creature. After it had pleased the Lord to show me the truth more
clearly, in the summer of 1829, I wrote in a different way; but in the
commencement of the year 1833 I felt pressed in spirit once more, most
fully, not so much as a son, but as a servant of Christ, to write, and to
point out to him minutely his state, showing him the danger of his soul,
the grounds of which I fully laid before him. When this, as formerly,
greatly displeased him, I ceased to speak any more in this way, and from
that time I aimed and still aim more and more to show him love in action,
as it becomes a believing son, telling him only how happy I am--how I am
supported under such and such trials--how I am not caring about certain
things as formerly I did--in what an awful state I was once living, and how
God brought me out of it; and how any sinner, by forsaking his evil ways,
and believing on the Lord Jesus, may be brought to the same joy and
happiness, and what a delight it would be to me to meet my father at last
in heaven, &c. Since I have corresponded with him in this way, things have
been very comfortable, though I have brought as much truth before him as
formerly, and though I have never sent a letter without speaking,
comparatively, much about these things. On the same ground I have not on
this visit spoken directly to my father about the state of his soul,
though he has more than ever heard the truth from my lips. God has indeed
been with me, and I believe that I have been led by Him to pursue this
course. Different, however, has been the way in which I have dealt with my
unconverted brother; for the relationship in which I stand to him is a
different one. For this afternoon, I not only pointed out to him his
danger, but spoke also respecting his sins, and have done so in my
letters, and intend to do so still, if the Lord permit.
This afternoon brother Knabe called on me. He told me that he had already
experienced a trial on account of his intention to pay the money, as his
wife tried to keep him from it, by endeavouring to persuade him that God
does not require him to do such a thing, as he has taken two orphan
children into his house. He nevertheless is determined to do it. He saw,
however, another difficulty, which was, that, when he looked over the
papers containing the names of his creditors, it was found that all but
three, out of about thirty, were dead, and he did not know what to do
concerning them. I told him to go to those places where his creditors used
to live, and he might find, perhaps, some needy widows and fatherless
children, whom they had left behind; and, if not, he should inquire after
the lawful heirs, and pay the money to them. He saw with me, and declared
his full intention to do so, whatever it might cost, and seemed truly glad
that God at last, through my advice, had delivered him from this burden;
for from time to time the matter had pressed on his conscience that he
ought to do it.--I spent this evening in relating to my father and brother
some of the Lord's dealings with me in England, particularly how He has
graciously provided for my temporal wants in answer to prayer, and they
both seemed to feel, for the moment at least the blessedness of
such a life.
April 7. I saw brother Knabe this morning, who is still determined to pay
the money, though tried by his wife. I exhorted him to steadfastness. I
also saw some persons who called on me to hear about England, for every
one of whom the Lord gave me a word without any effort. It was especially
so last night. A friend of my father, a Roman Catholic, called, and I was
enabled to set the truths of the gospel before him, with their blessed
effects, without entering upon the Roman Catholic controversy.--A part of
this morning I spent in walking about with my father to see one of his
gardens, and some of his fields, because I knew it would give him
pleasure; and I felt that I ought in every way to show him kindness and
attention, as far as I conscientiously could. Tomorrow, God willing, I
intend to leave, and to return to England. The Lord, in His rich mercy, in
answer to my prayer, has enabled me so to walk before my father, and has
also impressed what I have said so far upon his heart, as to cause him to
say today, "May God help me to follow your example, and to act according
to what you have said to me."
April 9. Celle. Yesterday morning I drove with my father to Halberstadt,
where, with many tears, he separated from me. I was alone in the mail,
which was a great comfort to me. It was a solemn time. I found myself
again on the road to Brunswick, which I had traversed twice in the service
of the devil, and now I was traveling on it in the name of Jesus. I
discerned, in passing, the inn at Wolfenbuttel, from whence I intended to
run away, and where I was arrested. How peculiar were my feelings! In the
evening we reached Brunswick, from whence we started the same night.
During the night I heard a fearfully wicked, most profligate, infidel, and
scoffing conversation between the conducteur and a student, and the only
testimony I gave was, complete silence all the time. I arrived here this
morning at eight, and have been here all the morning, as the mail will not
start for Hamburg until four this afternoon. It has been far from well
with me in my soul today. That awful conversation last night has been
spiritual poison to me. How's very soon do we, even unconsciously, receive
evil!
April 10. Hamburg. I arrived here at ten this morning.--April 11. I went
on board last night, and at twelve we sailed. This morning at half-past
eleven we arrived at Cuxhaven, where we cast anchor, on account of a
strong contrary wind.--April 13. Though I desired as much, perhaps, as any
of the passengers speedily to get to the end of our voyage, longing to get
back again to my work in Bristol, and also to my wife and children, yet I
was kept in peace; and whilst some murmured at the contrary wind, the Lord
enabled me to lift up my heart in prayer that He would calm it, if it were
His holy will, and, accordingly, after a delay of about nineteen hours, we
plied again yesterday morning, at seven. At ten I was taken with sea
sickness, from which I had been kept during my four previous short voyages
in answer to prayer; but this time I on purpose refrained from praying
about it, as I did not know whether it was better for my health to be
seasick or not. The sickness continued the whole of yesterday. Today I am
well. We have fine and calm weather. I consider it a mercy that the Lord
has allowed me to be sea-sick.
April 15. Bristol. Yesterday at one we landed in London. In answer to
prayer I soon obtained my things from the Custom-house, and reached my
friends in Chancery Lane a little before two, where I found a letter from
my wife, stating that brother Craik is ill, having an inflammation in the
wind-pipe, and therefore, humanly speaking, will be unable to preach for
some time. In consequence of this I started immediately for Bristol, where
I arrived this morning. I found brother Craik better than I had expected,
though completely unable to attend to the ministry of the Word.
April 16. Today brother Craik and I received 11l. 15s. 9d. each, being a
legacy left to us some time since. We said once or twice to one another,
that perhaps this money might be paid at a time when we much needed it.
And so it is just now. May I and all my brethren leave the management of
all our affairs entirely to the Lord, who best knows what is good for us;
and may it be our concern to seek first the kingdom of God and His
righteousness, and all temporal supplies shall be added to us!
May 1. I went to see brother Craik, and found him better, but heard from
his medical attendant that he ought not to preach for several months. May
5. My father-in-law has been for several days very ill. May 15. Mr. Groves
continues very ill. May 29. This morning brother Craik went into
Devonshire for change of air.