BIRTHDAY DRESSES.
Lady Delacour’s history, and the manner in which it was related,
excited in Belinda’s mind astonishment, pity, admiration, and contempt:
astonishment at her inconsistency, pity for her misfortunes, admiration
of her talents, and contempt for her conduct. To these emotions
succeeded the recollection of the promise which she had made, not to
leave her in her last illness at the mercy of an insolent attendant.
This promise Belinda thought of with terror: she dreaded the sight of
sufferings which she knew must end in death: she dreaded the sight of
that affected gaiety and of that real levity which so ill became the
condition of a dying woman. She trembled at the idea of being under the
guidance of one who was so little able to conduct herself: and she could
not help blaming her aunt Stanhope severely for placing her in such a
perilous situation. It was obvious that some of Lady Delacour’s history
must have been known to Mrs. Stanhope; and Belinda, the more she
reflected, was the more surprised at her aunt’s having chosen such
a chaperon for a young woman just entering into the world. When the
understanding is suddenly roused and forced to exert itself, what a
multitude of deductions it makes in a short time! Belinda saw things in
a new light; and for the first time in her life she reasoned for herself
upon what she saw and felt. It is sometimes safer for young people to
see than to hear of certain characters. At a distance, Lady Delacour had
appeared to Miss Portman the happiest person in the world; upon a nearer
view, she discovered that her ladyship was one of the most miserable of
human beings. To have married her niece to such a man as Lord Delacour,
Mrs. Stanhope would have thought the most fortunate thing imaginable;
but it was now obvious to Belinda, that neither the title of
viscountess, nor the pleasure of spending three fortunes, could ensure
felicity. Lady Delacour confessed, that in the midst of the utmost
luxury and dissipation she had been a constant prey to ennui; that
the want of domestic happiness could never be supplied by that public
admiration of which she was so ambitious; and that the immoderate
indulgence of her vanity had led her, by inevitable steps, into follies
and imprudences which had ruined her health, and destroyed her peace of
mind. “If Lady Delacour, with all the advantages of wealth, rank, wit,
and beauty, has not been able to make herself happy in this life of
fashionable dissipation,” said Belinda to herself, “why should I follow
the same course, and expect to be more fortunate?”
It is singular, that the very means which Mrs. Stanhope had taken to
make a fine lady of her niece tended to produce an effect diametrically
opposite to what might have been expected. The result of Belinda’s
reflections upon Lady Delacour’s history was a resolution to benefit by
her bad example; but this resolution it was more easy to form than
to keep. Her ladyship, where she wished to please or to govern, had
fascinating manners, and could alternately use the sarcastic powers of
wit, and the fond tone of persuasion, to accomplish her purposes. It was
Belinda’s intention, in pursuance of her new plans of life, to spend,
whilst she remained in London, as little money as possible upon
superfluities and dress. She had, at her own disposal, only 100l. per
annum, the interest of her fortune; but besides this, her aunt, who was
desirous that she should go to court, and make a splendid figure there,
had sent her a draught on her banker for two hundred guineas. “You will,
I trust,” said her aunt, at the conclusion of the letter, “repay me when
you are established in the world; as I hope and believe, from what I
hear from Lady Delacour of the power of your charms, you will soon be,
to the entire satisfaction of all your friends. Pray do not neglect to
mention my friend Clarence Hervey particularly when you write next.
I understand from one who is well acquainted with him, and who has
actually seen his rent-roll, that he has a clear 10,000l. a year.”
Belinda resolved neither to go to court, nor to touch her aunt’s two
hundred guineas; and she wrote a long letter to her, in which she
explained her feelings and views at large. In this letter she meant
to have returned Mrs. Stanhope’s draught, but her feelings and views
changed between the writing of this epistle and the going out of the
post. Mrs. Franks, the milliner, came in the interim, and brought home
Lady Delacour’s beautiful dress: it was not the sight of this, however,
which changed Belinda’s mind; but she could not resist Lady Delacour’s
raillery.
“Why, my dear,” said her ladyship, after having listened to all Miss
Portman could say about her love of independence, and the necessity
of economy to preserve that independence, “all this is prodigiously
fine--but shall I translate it into plain English? You were mortally
wounded the other night by some random reflections of a set of foolish
young men--Clarence Hervey amongst the number; and instead of punishing
them, you sagely and generously determined to punish yourself. Then, to
convince this youth that you have not a thought of those odious nets and
cages, that you have no design whatever upon his heart, and that he has
no manner of influence on yours, you very judiciously determine, at
the first hint from him, to change your dress, your manners, and your
character, and thus to say to him, in as plain terms as possible--‘You
see, sir, a word to the wise is enough; I understand you disapprove of
showy dress and coquetry, and therefore, as I dressed and coquetted only
to please you, now I shall lay aside dress and coquetry, since I
find that they are not to your taste--and I hope, sir, you like my
simplicity!’ Depend upon it, my dear, Clarence Hervey understands
simplicity as well as you or I do. All this would be vastly well, if he
did not know that you overheard that conversation; but as he does know
it, trust me, he will attribute any sudden change in your manners and
appearance, right or wrong, to the motives I have mentioned. So don’t,
novice as you are! set about to manoeuvre for yourself. Leave all that
to your aunt Stanhope, or to me, and then you know your conscience will
be all the time as white as your hands,--which, by-the-bye, Clarence
Hervey, the other day, said were the whitest hands he had ever seen.
Perhaps all this time you have taken it into your head that full dress
will not become you; but I assure you that it will--you look well in any
thing--
‘But from the hoop’s bewitching round,
The very shoe has power to wound.’
So come down to Mrs. Franks, and order your birthnight dress like a
reasonable creature.”
Like a reasonable creature, Miss Portman followed Lady Delacour, and
bespoke, or rather let her ladyship bespeak for her, fifty guineas’
worth of elegance and fashion. “You must go to the drawing-room with me
next week, and be presented,” said Lady Delacour, “and then, as it is
the first time, you must be elegantly dressed, and you must not wear
the same dress on the birthnight. So, Mrs. Franks, let this be finished
first, as fast as you can, and by that time, perhaps, we shall think of
something superlatively charming for the night of nights.”
Mrs. Franks departed, and Belinda sighed. “A silver penny for your
thoughts!” cried Lady Delacour. “You are thinking that you are like
Camilla, and I like Mrs. Mitten. Novel reading.--as I dare say you have
been told by your governess, as I was told by mine, and she by hers, I
suppose--novel reading for young ladies is the most dangerous----
“Oh, Clarence Hervey, I protest!” cried Lady Delacour, as he at this
instant entered the room. “Do, pray, Clarence, help me out, for the sake
of this young lady, with a moral sentence against novel reading: but
that might go against your conscience, or your interest; so we’ll spare
you. How I regret that we had not the charming serpent at the masquerade
the other night!”
The moment her ladyship mentioned the masquerade, the conversation
which had passed at Lady Singleton’s came full into Clarence Hervey’s
recollection, and his embarrassment was evident--not indeed to Belinda,
who had turned away to look over some new music that lay upon a stand
at the farthest end of the room; and she found this such a wonderfully
interesting occupation, that she did not for some minutes hear, or
appear to hear, one word of the conversation which was going on between
Mr. Hervey and Lady Delacour. At last, her ladyship tapped her upon
the shoulder, saying, in a playful tone, “Miss Portman, I arrest your
attention at the suit of Clarence Hervey: this gentleman is passionately
fond of music--to my curse--for he never sees my harp but he worries
me with reproaches for having left off playing upon it. Now he has just
given me his word that he will not reproach me again for a month to come
if you will favour us with one air. I assure you, Clarence, that Belinda
touches a harp divinely--she would absolutely charm----” “Your ladyship
should not waste such valuable praise,” interrupted Belinda. “Do you
forget that Belinda Portman and her accomplishments have already been as
well advertised as Packwood’s razor-strops?”
The manner in which these words were pronounced made a great impression
upon Clarence Hervey, and he began to believe it was possible that a
niece of the match-making Mrs. Stanhope might not be “a compound of
art and affectation.” “Though her aunt has advertised her,” said he to
himself, “she seems to have too much dignity to advertise herself, and
it would be very unjust to blame her for the faults of another person. I
will see more of her.”
Some morning visitors were announced, who for the time suspended
Clarence Hervey’s reflections: the effect of them, however, immediately
appeared; for as his good opinion of Belinda increased, his ambition to
please her was strongly excited. He displayed all his powers of wit
and humour; and not only Lady Delacour but every body present observed,
“that Mr. Hervey, who was always the most entertaining man in the world,
this morning surpassed himself, and was absolutely the most entertaining
man in the universe.” He was mortified, notwithstanding; for he
distinctly perceived, that whilst Belinda joined with ease and dignity
in the general conversation, her manner towards him was grave and
reserved. The next morning he called earlier than usual; but though Lady
Delacour was always at home to him, she was then unluckily dressing
to go to court: he inquired whether Miss Portman would accompany her
ladyship, and he learnt from his friend Marriott that she was not to be
presented this day, because Mrs. Franks had not brought home her dress.
Mr. Hervey called again two hours afterwards.--Lady Delacour was gone
to court. He asked for Miss Portman. “Not at home,” was the mortifying
answer; though, as he had passed by the windows, he had heard the
delightful sound of her harp. He walked up and down in the square
impatiently, till he saw Lady Delacour’s carriage appear.
“The drawing-room has lasted an unconscionable time this morning,”
said he, as he handed her ladyship out of her coach, “Am not I the most
virtuous of virtuous women,” said Lady Delacour, “to go to court such a
day as this? But,” whispered she, as she went up stairs, “like all other
amazingly good people, I have amazingly good reasons for being good. The
queen is soon to give a charming breakfast at Frogmore, and I am paying
my court with all my might, in hopes of being asked; for Belinda must
see one of their galas before we leave town, _that_ I’m determined
upon.--But where is she?” “Not at home,” said Clarence, smiling. “Oh,
not at home is nonsense, you know. Shine out, appear, be found, my
lovely Zara!” cried Lady Delacour, opening the library door. “Here she
is--what doing I know not--studying Hervey’s Meditations on the Tombs, I
should guess, by the sanctification of her looks. If you be not totally
above all sublunary considerations, admire my lilies of the valley, and
let me give you a lecture, not upon heads, or upon hearts, but on what
is of much more consequence, upon hoops. Every body wears hoops, but
how few--‘tis a melancholy consideration--how very few can manage them!
There’s my friend Lady C----; in an elegant undress she passes for very
genteel, but put her into a hoop and she looks as pitiable a figure, as
much a prisoner, and as little able to walk, as a child in a go-cart.
She gets on, I grant you, and so does the poor child; but, getting on,
you know, is not walking. Oh, Clarence, I wish you had seen the two
Lady R.’s sticking close to one another, their father pushing them on
together, like two decanters in a bottle-coaster, with such magnificent
diamond labels round their necks!”
Encouraged by Clarence Hervey’s laughter, Lady Delacour went on to mimic
what she called the hoop awkwardness of all her acquaintance; and if
these could have failed to divert Belinda, it was impossible for her to
be serious when she heard Clarence Hervey declare that he was convinced
he could manage a hoop as well as any woman in England, except Lady
Delacour.
“Now here,” said he, “is the purblind dowager, Lady Boucher, just at the
door, Lady Delacour; she would not know my face, she would not see my
beard, and I will bet fifty guineas that I come into a room in a hoop,
and that she does not find me out by my air--that I do not betray
myself, in short, by my masculine awkwardness.”
“I hold you to your word, Clarence,” cried Lady Delacour. “They have let
the purblind dowager in; I hear her on the stairs. Here--through this
way you can go: as you do every thing quicker than any body else in the
world, you will certainly be full dressed in a quarter of an hour; I’ll
engage to keep the dowager in scandal for that time. Go! Marriott has
old hoops and old finery of mine, and you have all-powerful influence,
I know, with Marriott: so go and use it, and let us see you in all your
glory--though I vow I tremble for my fifty guineas.”
Lady Delacour kept the dowager in scandal, according to her engagement,
for a good quarter of an hour; then the dresses at the drawing-room took
up another quarter; and, at last, the dowager began to give an account
of sundry wonderful cures that had been performed, to her certain
knowledge, by her favourite concentrated extract or anima of quassia.
She entered into the history of the negro slave named Quassi, who
discovered this medical wood, which he kept a close secret till Mr.
Daghlberg, a magistrate of Surinam, wormed it out of him, brought
a branch of the tree to Europe, and communicated it to the great
Linnaeus--when Clarence Hervey was announced by the title of “The
Countess de Pomenars.”
“An émigrée--a charming woman!” whispered Lady Delacour “she was to have
been at the drawing-room to-day but for a blunder of mine: ready dressed
she was, and I didn’t call for her! Ah, Mad. de Pomenars, I am actually
ashamed to see you,” continued her ladyship; and she went forward to
meet Clarence Hervey, who really made his entrée with very composed
assurance and grace. He managed his hoop with such skill and dexterity,
that he well deserved the praise of being a universal genius. The
Countess de Pomenars spoke French and broken English incomparably well,
and she made out that she was descended from the Pomenars of the time
of Mad. de Sevigné: she said that she had in her possession several
original letters of Mad. de Sevigné, and a lock of Mad. de Grignan’s
fine hair.
“I have sometimes fancied, but I believe it is only my fancy,” said Lady
Delacour, “that this young lady,” turning to Belinda, “is not unlike
your Mad. de Grignan. I have seen a picture of her at Strawberry-hill.”
Mad. de Pomenars acknowledged that there was a resemblance, but added,
that it was flattery in the extreme to Mad. de Grignan to say so.
“It would be a sin, undoubtedly, to waste flattery upon the dead, my
dear countess,” said Lady Delacour; “but here, without flattery to the
living, as you have a lock of Mad. de Grignan’s hair, you can tell us
whether _la belle chevelure_, of which Mad. de Sevigné talked so much,
was any thing to be compared to my Belinda’s.” As she spoke, Lady
Delacour, before Belinda was aware of her intentions, dexterously let
down her beautiful tresses; and the Countess de Pomenars was so much
struck at the sight, that she was incapable of paying the necessary
compliments. “Nay, touch it,” said Lady Delacour--“it is so fine and so
soft.”
At this dangerous moment her ladyship artfully let drop the comb.
Clarence Hervey suddenly stooped to pick it up, totally forgetting his
hoop and his character. He threw down the music-stand with his hoop.
Lady Delacour exclaimed “Bravissima!” and burst out a-laughing. Lady
Boucher, in amazement, looked from one to another for an explanation,
and was a considerable time before, as she said, she could believe her
own eyes. Clarence Hervey acknowledged he had lost his bet, joined in
the laugh, and declared that fifty guineas was too little to pay for the
sight of the finest hair that he had ever beheld. “I declare he deserves
a lock of _la belle chevelure_ for that speech, Miss Portman,” cried
Lady Delacour; “I’ll appeal to all the world--Mad. de Pomenars must have
a lock to measure with Mad. de Grignan’s? Come, a second rape of the
lock, Belinda.”
Fortunately for Belinda, “the glittering forfex” was not immediately
produced, as fine ladies do not now, as in former times, carry any such
useless implements about with them.
Such was the modest, graceful dignity of Miss Portman’s manners, that
she escaped without even the charge of prudery. She retired to her own
apartment as soon as she could.
“She passes on in unblenched majesty,” said Lady Delacour.
“She is really a charming woman,” said Clarence Hervey, in a low voice,
to Lady Delacour, drawing her into a recessed window: he in the same
low voice continued, “Could I obtain a private audience of a few minutes
when your ladyship is at leisure?--I have--” “I am never at leisure,”
interrupted Lady Delacour; “but if you have any thing particular to say
to me--as I guess you have, by my skill in human nature--come here to my
concert to-night, before the rest of the world. Wait patiently in the
music-room, and perhaps I may grant you a private audience, as you had
the grace not to call it a _tête-à-tête_. In the mean time, my dear
Countess de Pomenars, had we not better take off our hoops?” In the
evening, Clarence Hervey was in the music-room a considerable time
before Lady Delacour appeared: how patiently he waited is not known to
any one but himself.
“Have not I given you time to compose a charming speech?” said Lady
Delacour as she entered the room; “but make it as short as you can,
unless you wish that Miss Portman should hear it, for she will be down
stairs in three minutes.”
“In one word, then, my dear Lady Delacour, can you, and will you, make
my peace with Miss Portman?--I am much concerned about that foolish
razor-strop dialogue which she overheard at Lady Singleton’s.”
“You are concerned that she overheard it, no doubt.”
“No,” said Clarence Hervey, “I am rejoiced that she overheard it, since
it has been the means of convincing me of my mistake; but I am concerned
that I had the presumption and injustice to judge of Miss Portman so
hastily. I am convinced that, though she is a niece of Mrs. Stanhope’s,
she has dignity of mind and simplicity of character. Will you, my dear
Lady Delacour, tell her so?”
“Stay,” interrupted Lady Delacour; “let me get it by heart. I should
have made a terrible bad messenger of the gods and goddesses, for I
never in my life could, like Iris, repeat a message in the same words
in which it was delivered to me. Let me see--‘Dignity of mind and
simplicity of character,’ was not it? May not I say at once, ‘My dear
Belinda, Clarence Hervey desires me to tell you that he is convinced
you are an angel?’ That single word _angel_ is so expressive, so
comprehensive, so comprehensible, it contains, believe me, all that can
be said or imagined on these occasions, _de part et d’autre_.”
“But,” said Mr. Hervey, “perhaps Miss Portman has heard the song of--
‘What know we of angels?-- I spake it in jest.’”
“Then you are not in jest, but in downright sober earnest?--Ha!” said
Lady Delacour, with an arch look, “I did not know it was already come to
_this_ with you.”
And her ladyship, turning to her piano-forte, played--
“There was a young man in Ballinacrasy,
Who wanted a wife to make him un_asy_,
And thus in gentle strains he spoke her,
Arrah, will you marry me, my dear Ally Croker?”
“No, no,” exclaimed Clarence, laughing, “it is not come to _that_ with
me yet, Lady Delacour, I promise you; but is not it possible to say that
a young lady has dignity of mind and simplicity of character without
having or suggesting any thoughts of marriage?”
“You make a most proper, but not sufficiently emphatic difference
between having or suggesting such thoughts,” said Lady Delacour. “A
gentleman sometimes finds it for his interest, his honour, or his
pleasure, to suggest what he would not for the world promise,--I mean
perform.”
“A scoundrel,” cried Clarence Hervey, “not a gentleman, may find it for
his honour, or his interest, or his pleasure, to promise what he would
not perform; but I am not a scoundrel. I never made any promise to man
or woman that I did not keep faithfully. I am not a swindler in love.”
“And yet,” said Lady Delacour, “you would have no scruple to trifle or
flatter a woman out of her heart.”
_“Cela est selon!”_ said Clarence smiling; “a fair exchange, you know,
is no robbery. When a fine woman robs me of my heart, surely Lady
Delacour could not expect that I should make no attempt upon hers.”--“Is
this part of my message to Miss Portman?” said Lady Delacour. “As your
ladyship pleases,” said Clarence; “I trust entirely to your discretion.”
“Why I really have a great deal of discretion,” said Lady Delacour; “but
you trust too much to it when you expect that I should execute, both
with propriety and success, the delicate commission of telling a young
lady, who is under my protection, that a young gentleman, who is a
professed admirer of mine, is in love with her, but has no thoughts, and
wishes to suggest no thoughts, of marriage.”
“In love!” exclaimed Clarence Hervey; “but when did I ever use the
expression? In speaking of Miss Portman, I simply expressed esteem and
ad--------”
“No additions,” said Lady Delacour; “content yourself with
esteem--simply,--and Miss Portman is safe, and you too, I presume.
Apropos; pray, Clarence, how do your esteem and _admiration_ (I may go
as far as that, may not I?) of Miss Portman agree with your admiration
of Lady Delacour?”
“Perfectly well,” replied Clarence; “for all the world must be sensible
that Clarence Hervey is a man of too much taste to compare a country
novice in wit and accomplishments to Lady Delacour. He might, as men
of genius sometimes do, look forward to the idea of forming a country
novice for a wife. A man must marry some time or other--but my hour,
thank Heaven, is not come yet.”
“Thank Heaven!” said Lady Delacour; “for you know a married man is lost
to the world of fashion and gallantry.”
“Not more so, I should hope, than a married woman,” said Clarence
Harvey. Here a loud knocking at the door announced the arrival of
company to the concert. “You will make my peace, you promise me, with
Miss Portman,” cried Clarence eagerly.
“Yes, I will make your peace, and you shall see Belinda smile upon
you once more, upon condition,” continued Lady Delacour, speaking
very quickly, as if she was hurried by the sound of people coming up
stairs--“but we’ll talk of that another time.”
“Nay, nay, my dear Lady Delacour, now, now,” said Clarence, seizing her
hand.--“Upon condition! upon what condition?”
“Upon condition that you do a little job for me--indeed for Belinda. She
is to go with me to the birth-night, and she has often hinted to me that
our horses are shockingly shabby for people of our condition. I know she
wishes that upon such an occasion--her first appearance at court, you
know--we should go in style. Now my dear positive lord has _said_ he
will not let us have a pair of the handsomest horses I ever saw, which
are at Tattersal’s, and on which Belinda, I know, has secretly set her
heart, as I have openly, in vain.”
“Your ladyship and Miss Portman cannot possibly set your hearts on
any thing in vain--especially on any thing that it is in the power of
Clarence Hervey to procure. Then,” added he, gallantly kissing her hand,
“may I thus seal my treaty of peace?”
“What audacity!--don’t you see these people coming in?” cried Lady
Delacour; and she withdrew her hand, but with no great precipitation.
She was evidently, “at this moment, as in all the past,” neither afraid
nor ashamed that Mr. Hervey’s devotions to her should be paid in public.
With much address she had satisfied herself as to his views with respect
to Belinda. She was convinced that he had no immediate thoughts of
matrimony; but that if he were condemned to marry, Miss Portman would
be his wife. As this did not interfere with her plans, Lady Delacour was
content.