First came great Neptune, with his three-fork mace
That rules the seas, and makes them rise or fall;
His dewy locks did drop with brine apace
Under his diademe imperiall:
And by his side his queene with coronall,
Fair Amphitrite
...
These marched farre afore the other crew.
SPENSER.
I remained no longer at home than sufficed to restore my strength, after
the serious attack of fever and ague which I had brought with me from
Walcheren. Although my father received me kindly, he had not forgotten
(at least I thought so) my former transgressions; a mutual distrust
destroyed that intimacy which ought ever to exist between father and
son. The thread was broken--it is vain to inquire how, and the
consequence was, that the day of my departure to join a frigate on the
North American station was welcomed with joy by me, and seen unregretted
by my father.
The ship I was about to join was commanded by a young nobleman; and as
patricians were not so plentiful in the service at that time as they
have since become, I was considered fortunate in my appointment. I was
ordered, with about thirty more supernumerary midshipmen, to take my
passage in a ship of the line going to Bermuda. The gun-room was given
to us as our place of residence, the midshipmen belonging to the ship
occupying the two snug berths in the cockpit.
Among so many young men of different habits and circumstances, all
joining the ship at different periods, no combination could be made for
forming a mess. The ship sailed soon after I got on board, and our
party, during the voyage, was usually supplied from the purser's
steward-room. I have thought it very wonderful, that a mess of eight or
twelve seamen or marines will always make the allowance last from one
week to another, and have something to spare; but with the same number
of midshipmen the case is very different, and the larger the mess the
more do their difficulties increase; they are never satisfied, never
have enough, and if the purser will allow them, are always in debt for
flour, beef, pork, and spirits. This is owing to their natural habits
of carelessness; and our mess, for this reason, was particularly
uncomfortable. The government was a democracy; but the caterer had at
times been invested with dictatorial powers, which he either abused or
was thought to abuse, and he was accordingly turned out, or resigned in
disgust, at the end of two or three days.
Most of my mess-mates were young men, senior to me in the service,
having passed their examinations, and were going to America for
promotion: but when mustered on the quarter-deck, whether they appeared
less manly, or were in fact less expert in their duty, I know not; but
certain it is, that the first lieutenant appointed me mate of a watch,
and placed several of these aspirants under my orders: and so strong did
we muster, that we stood in each other's way when on deck keeping our
watch, seldom less than seventeen or eighteen in number.
In the gun-room we agreed very ill together, and one principal cause of
this was our short allowance of food--daily skirmishes took place, and
not unfrequently pitched battles; but I never took any other part in
them than as a spectator, and the observations I made convinced me that
I should have no great difficulty in mastering the whole of them.
The office of caterer was one of neither honour nor emolument, and it
was voluntarily taken up, and peevishly laid down on the first trifling
provocation. With the ship's allowance, no being less than an angel
could have given satisfaction. The division of beef and cork into as
many parcels as there were claimants, always produced remonstrance,
reproof, and blows. I was never quarrelsome, and took the part allotted
to me quietly enough, until, they finding my disposition to submit, I
found my portion daily decrease; and on the resignation of the
thirteenth caterer, I volunteered my services, which were gladly
accepted.
Aware of the danger and difficulty of my situation, I was prepared
accordingly. On the first day that I shared the provisions, I took very
good care of number one, and, as I had foreseen, was attacked by two or
three for my lion-like division of the prey. Upon this, I made them a
short speech, observing, that if they supposed I meant to take the
trouble of catering for nothing, they were much mistaken; that the small
difference I made between their portions and mine, if equally divided
among them, would not fill a hollow tooth, and that, after my own share,
all others should be distributed with the most rigid impartiality and
scrupulous regard to justice.
This very reasonable speech did not satisfy them. I was challenged to
decide the point _a la Cribb_; two candidates for the honour stepped out
at once. I desired them to toss up; and having soon defeated the
winner, I recommended him to return to his seat. The next man came
forward, hoping to find an easy victory, after the fatigue of a recent
battle; but he was mistaken, and retired with severe chastisement. The
next day I took my seat, cleared for action--coat, waistcoat, and
neckcloth off. I observed that I should proceed as I had done before,
and was ready to hold a court of Oyer and Terminer; but no suitors
appeared, and I held the office of caterer from that day till I quitted
the ship, by the strongest of all possible claims--first, by election;
and, secondly, by right of conquest.
We had not been many days at sea before we discovered that our first
lieutenant was a most abominable tyrant, a brutal fellow, a drunkard,
and a glutton, with a long red nose, and a large belly; he frequently
sent half a dozen grown-up midshipmen to the mast-head at a time. This
man I determined to turn out of the ship, and mentioned my intention to
my mess-mates, promising them success if they would only follow my
advice. They quite laughed at the idea; but I was firm and told them
that it should come to pass if they would but behave so ill as just to
incur a slight punishment or reprimand from "Nosey" every day; this they
agreed to, and not a day passed but they were either mast-headed, or put
watch and watch.
They reported all to me, and asked my advice. "Complain to the
captain," said I. They did, and were told that the first lieutenant had
done his duty. The same causes produced the same effects on each
succeeding day; and when the midshipmen complained, they had no redress.
By my direction, they observed to the captain, "It is of no use
complaining, sir; you always take Mr Clewline's part." The captain,
indeed, from a general sense of propriety, gave his support to the
ward-room officers, knowing that, nine times in ten, midshipmen were in
the wrong.
Things worked as I wished; the midshipmen persisted in behaving ill--
remonstrated, and declared that the first lieutenant did not tell the
truth. For a time, many of them lost the favour of the captain; but I
encouraged them to bear that, as well as the increased rancour of "Old
Nosey." One day, two midshipmen, by previous agreement, began to fight
on the lee gangway. In those days, that was crime enough almost to have
hanged them; they were sent to the mast-head for three hours, and when
they came down applied to me for advice. "Go," said I, "and complain.
If the first lieutenant says you were fighting, tell the captain you
were only showing how the first lieutenant pummelled the men last night
when they were hoisting the topsails, and the way he cut the marine's
head, when he knocked him down the hatchway." All this was fairly
done--the midshipmen received a reprimand, but the captain began to
think there might be some cause for these continued complaints, which
daily increased both in weight and number.
At last we were enabled to give the _coup de grace_. A wretched boy in
the ship, whose dirty habits often brought him to the gun, was so
hardened that he laughed at all the stripes of the boatswain's cat
inflicted on him by the first lieutenant. "I will make him feel," said
the enraged officer; so ordering a bowl of brine to be brought to him,
he sprinkled it on the lacerated flesh of the boy between every lash.
This inhuman act, so unbecoming the character of an officer and a
gentleman, we all resented, and retiring to the gun-room in a body, gave
three deep and heavy groans in chorus. The effect was dismal; it was
heard in the ward-room, and the first lieutenant sent down to desire we
should be quiet; on which we immediately gave three more, which sent him
in a rage to the quarter-deck, where we were all summoned, and the
reason of the noise demanded. I had, till then, kept myself in the
background, content with being the _primum mobile_, without being seen.
I was always strict to my duty, and never had been complained of; my
coming forward, therefore, on this occasion, produced a fine stage
effect, and carried great weight.
I told the lieutenant we were groaning for the poor boy who had been
pickled. This increased his rage, and he ordered me up to the
mast-head. I refused to go until I had seen the captain, who at that
moment made his appearance on deck. I immediately referred to him,
related the whole story, not omitting to mention the repeated acts of
tyranny which the lieutenant had perpetrated on us all. I saw in a
moment that we had gained the day. The captain had given the most
positive orders that no one should be punished without his express
permission. This order the lieutenant had disobeyed; and that, added to
his unpopular character, decided his fate. The captain walked into his
cabin, and the next day signified to the first lieutenant that he must
quit the ship on her arrival in port, or be tried by a court-martial:
this latter he knew he dared not stand.
I should have informed my reader that our orders were to see the
East-India convoy as far as the tenth degree of north latitude, and then
proceed to Bermuda. This was of itself a pleasant cruise, and gave us
the chance of falling in either with an enemy or a recapture. Ships not
intending to cross the line usually grant a saturnalia to the crew when
they come to the tropic of Capricorn; it is thought to renovate their
spirits, and to break the monotony of the cruise, or voyage, where time
flows on in such a smooth, undeviating routine, that one day is not
distinguishable from another. Our captain, a young man, and a perfect
gentleman, never refused any indulgence to the men compatible with
discipline and the safety of the ship: and as the regular trade-wind
blew, there was no danger of sudden squalls. The ceremony of crossing
the line, I am aware, has been often described--so has Italy and the
Rhine; but there are varieties of ways of doing and relating these
things; ours had its singularity, and ended, I am sorry to say, in a
deep tragedy, which I shall remember "as long as memory holds her seat."
One beautiful morning, as soon as the people had breakfasted, they began
to prepare, by stripping to their waists, and wearing nothing but a pair
of duck trousers. The man at the mast-head called out that he saw
something on the weather bow, which he thought was a boat; soon after,
an unknown voice from the jib-boom hailed the ship; the officer of the
watch answered; and the voice commanded him to heave to, as Neptune was
coming on board. The ship was accordingly hove-to with every formality,
though going at the rate of seven miles an hour: the main yard squared,
the head and after-yards braced up.
As soon as the ship was hove-to, a young man (one of the sailors)
dressed in a smart suit of black, knee-breeches, and buckles, with his
hair powdered, and with all the extra finery and mincing gait of an
exquisite, came aft on the quarter-deck, and, with a most polished bow,
took the liberty of introducing himself as _gentleman's gentleman_ to
Mr Neptune, who had been desired to precede his master and acquaint the
commander of the vessel with his intended visit.
A sail had been extended across the forecastle by way of curtain, and
from behind this Neptune and his train, in full costume, shortly
afterwards came forth.
The car of the god consisted of a gun-carriage: it was drawn by six
black men, part of the ship's crew: they were tall muscular fellows,
their heads were covered with sea-weed, and they wore a very small pair
of cotton drawers: in other respects they were perfectly naked; their
skins were spotted all over with red and white paint alternately; they
had conch shells in their hands, with which they made a most horrible
noise. Neptune was masked, as were many of his attendants, and none of
the officers knew exactly by which of the men the god was represented;
but he was a shrewd hand, and did his part very well. He wore a naval
crown, made by the ship's armourer; in his right hand he held a trident,
on the prongs of which there was a dolphin, which he had, he said,
struck that morning; he wore a large wig, made of oakum, and a beard of
the same materials, which flowed down to his waist; he was full
powdered, and his naked body was bedaubed with paint.
The god was attended by a splendid court: his secretary of state, whose
head was stuck full of the quills of the sea-bird of these latitudes;
his surgeon, with his lancet, pill-box, and his smelling-bottle; his
barber, with a razor, whose blade was two feet long, cut off an iron
hoop; and the barber's mate, who carried a small tub as a shaving-box;
the materials within I could not analyse, but my nose convinced me that
no part of them came from Smith's, in Bond-street.
Amphitrite followed, on a similar carriage, drawn by six white men,
whose costume was like the others. This goddess was personified by an
athletic, ugly man, marked with the small-pox, dressed as a female, with
a woman's night-cap on his head, ornamented with sprigs of sea-weed; she
had a harpoon in her hand, on which was fixed an albicore; and in her
lap lay one of the boys of the ship, dressed as a baby, with long
clothes and a cap: he held in his hand a marlinspike, which was
suspended round his neck with a rope-yarn--this was to assist him in
cutting his teeth, as the children on shore use a coral. His nurse
attended him with a bucket full of burgoo, or hasty pudding, with which
she occasionally fed him out of the cook's iron ladle. Two or three
stout men were habited as sea nymphs, to attend on the goddess: they
carried a looking-glass, some currycombs, a birch-broom, and a pot of
red paint, by way of rouge.
As soon as the procession appeared, on the forecastle, the captain,
attended by his steward, bearing a tray with a bottle of wine and some
glasses, came out of his cabin, and the cars of the marine deities were
drawn up on the quarter-deck. Neptune lowered his trident, and
presented the dolphin to the captain, as Amphitrite did her albicore, in
token of submission and homage to the representative of the King of
Great Britain.
"I have come," said the god, "to welcome you into my dominions, and to
present my wife and child." The captain bowed. "Allow me to ask after
my brother and liege sovereign, the good old King George."
"He is not so well," said the captain, "as I and all his subjects could
wish."
"More's the pity," replied Neptune; "and how is the Prince of Wales?"
"The Prince is well," said the captain, "and now governs as regent in
the name of his royal father."
"And how does he get on with his wife?" said the inquisitive god.
"Bad enough," said the captain; "they agree together like a whale and a
thrasher."
"Ah! I thought so," said the god of the sea. "His royal highness
should take a leaf out of my book: never allow it to be doubtful who is
commanding officer."
"And pray what might your majesty's specific be, to cure a bad wife?"
said the captain.
"Three feet of the cross-jack brace every morning before breakfast, for
a quarter of an hour, and half an hour on a Sunday."
"But why more on a Sunday than any other day?" said the captain.
"Why?" said Neptune. "Why, because she'd been keeping Saturday night,
to be sure; besides, she has less to do of a Sunday, and more time to
think of her sins, and do penance."
"But you would not have a prince strike a lady, surely?"
"Wouldn't I? No, to be sure, if she behave herself as _sich_, on no
account; but if she gives tongue, and won't keep sober, I'd sarve her as
I do Amphy--don't I, Amphy?" chucking the goddess under the chin. "We
have no bad wives in the bottom of the sea: and so if you don't know how
to keep 'em in order, send them to us."
"But your majesty's remedy is violent; we should have a rebellion in
England, if the king was to beat his wife."
"Make the lords in waiting do it, then," said the surly god; "and if
they are too lazy, which I dare say they are, send for a boatswain's
mate from the Royal Billy--he'd sarve her out, I warrant you, and for
half a gallon of rum would teach the yeomen of the guard to dance the
binnacle hornpipe into the bargain."
"His royal highness shall certainly hear your advice, Mr Neptune; but
whether he will follow it or not, is not for me to say. Would you
please to drink his royal highness's good health?"
"With all my heart, sir; I was always loyal to my king, and ready to
drink his health, and to fight for him."
The captain presented the god with a bumper of Madeira, and another to
the goddess.
"Here's a good health and a long life to our gracious king and all the
royal family. The roads are unkimmon dusty, and we hav'n't wet our lips
since we left St. Thomas on the line, this morning. But we have no time
to lose, captain," said the sea god; "I see many new faces here, as
requires washing and shaving; and if we add bleeding and physic, they
will be all the better for it."
The captain nodded assent; and Neptune, striking the deck with the end
of his trident, commanded attention, and thus addressed his court: "Hark
ye, my Tritons, you are called here to shave, duck, and physic all as
needs; but I command you to be gentle. I'll have no ill-usage; if we
gets a bad name, we gets no more fees; and the first of you as disobeys
my orders, I'll tie him to a ten-inch mortar, and sink him ten thousand
fathoms deep in the ocean, where he shall feed on salt water and
sea-weed for a hundred years: begone to your work." Twelve constables,
with thick sticks, immediately repaired to the hatchway, and sent down
all who had not been initiated, guarding them strictly, until they were
called up one by one.
The cow-pen had been previously prepared for the bathing; it was lined
with double canvas, and boarded, so that it held water, and contained
about four butts, which was constantly renewed by the pump. Many of the
officers purchased exemption from shaving and physic by a bottle of rum;
but none could escape the sprinkling of salt water, which fell about in
great profusion; even the captain received his share, but with great
good-nature, and seemed to enjoy the sport. It was easy to perceive, on
this occasion, who were favourites with the ship's company, by the
degree of severity with which they were treated. The tyro was seated on
the side of the cow-pen: he was asked the place of his nativity, and the
moment he opened his mouth, the shaving-brush of the barber, which was a
very large paint-brush, was crammed in, with all the filthy lather, with
which they covered his face and chin; this was roughly scraped off with
the great razor. The doctor felt his pulse, and prescribed a pill,
which was forced into his cheek; and the smelling-bottle, the cork of
which was armed with short points of pins, was so forcibly applied to
his nose as to bring blood; after this, he was thrown backwards into the
bath, and allowed to scramble out the best way he could.
The master-at-arms, and ship's corporals, and purser's steward, were
severely treated. The midshipmen looked out for the first lieutenant;
but he kept so close under the wing of the captain, that for a long time
we were unable to succeed. At length, some great uproar in the waist
induced him to run down, when we all surrounded him, and plied him so
effectually with buckets of water, that he was glad to run down the
after-hatchway, and seek shelter in the gun-room; as he ran down, we
threw the buckets after him, and he fell, like the Roman virgin, covered
with the shields of the soldiers.
The purser had fortified himself in his cabin, and with his sword and
pistols, vowed vengeance against all intruders; but the middies were not
to be frightened with swords or pistols: so we had him out, and gave him
a sound ducking, because he had refused to let us have more spirits than
our allowance. He was paraded to the main deck in great form, his sword
held over his head; his pistols, in a bucket of water, carried before
him; and having been duly shaved, physicked, and soused into the
cow-pen, he was allowed to return to his cabin, like a drowned rat.
The first lieutenant of marines was a great bore; he was always annoying
us with his German flute. Having no ear of his own, he had no mercy on
ours, so we handed him to the bath; and in addition to all the other
luxuries of the day, made him drink half a pint of salt water, which we
poured into his mouth through his own flute, as a funnel. I now
recollect that it was the cries of the poor marine which brought down
the first lieutenant, who ordered us to desist, and we served him as
hath been related.
Thus far all was hilarity and mirth; but the scene was very suddenly
changed. One of the foretopmen, drawing water in the chains, fell
overboard; the alarm was instantly given, and the ship hove-to. I ran
upon the poop, and, seeing that the man could not swim, jumped overboard
to save him. The height from which I descended made me go very deep in
the water, and when I arose I could perceive one of the man's hands. I
swam towards him; but, O God! what was my horror, when I found myself in
the midst of his blood. I comprehended in a moment that a shark had
taken him, and expected that every instant my own fate would be like
his. I wonder I had not sunk with fear: I was nearly paralysed. The
ship, which had been going six or seven miles an hour, was at some
distance, and I gave myself up for gone. I had scarcely the power of
reflection, and was overwhelmed by the sudden, awful, and, as I thought,
certain approach of death in its most horrible shape. In a moment I
recollected myself: and I believe the actions of five years crowded into
my mind in as many minutes. I prayed most fervently, and vowed
amendment, if it should please God to spare me. My prayer was heard,
and I believe it was a special Providence that rescued me from the jaws
of the fish. I was nearly a mile from the ship before I was picked up;
and when the boat came alongside with me, three large sharks were under
the stern. These had devoured the poor sailor, and, fortunately for me,
had followed the ship for more prey, and thus left me to myself.
As I went up the side, I was received by the captain and officers in the
most flattering manner; the captain thanked me in the presence of the
ship's company for my praiseworthy exertions, and I was gazed on by all
as an object of interest and admiration; but if others thought so of me,
I thought not so of myself. I retired below to my berth with a loathing
and contempt, a self-abasement, which I cannot describe. I felt myself
unworthy of the mercy I had received. The disgraceful and vicious
course of life I had led burst upon me with horrible conviction.
"_Caelo tonantem credidimus Jovem regnare_," says Horace; and it was
only by the excitement of such peculiarly horrid situations, that the
sense of a superintending power could be awakened within me, a hardened
and incorrigible sinner.
I changed my clothes, and was glad when night came, that I might be left
to myself; but oh, how infinitely more horrid did my situation appear!
I shuddered when I thought of what I had gone through, and I made the
most solemn promises of a new life. How transient were these feelings!
How long did these good resolutions last? Just as long as no temptation
came in the way; as long as there was no incitement to sin, no means of
gratifying appetite. My good intentions were traced in the sand. I was
very soon as thoughtless and as profane as ever, although frequently
checked by the remembrance of my providential escape; and for years
afterwards the thoughts of the shark taking me by the leg was
accompanied by the acknowledgment that the devil would have me in like
manner, if I did not amend.
If after this awakening circumstance I could have had the good fortune
to have met with sober-minded and religious people, I have no doubt but
I might have had at this time much less to answer for; but that not
being the case, the force of habit and example renewed its dominion over
me, and I became nearly as bad as ever.
Our amusements in the gun-room were rough. One of them was to lie on
the mess-table, under the tiller, and to hold by the tiller ropes above,
while we kicked at all who attempted to dislodge us, either by force or
stratagem. Whoever had possession had nine points of the law, and could
easily oppose the whole. I one day held this envied position, and kept
all at bay, when, unluckily, one of the passed midshipmen, who had got
very drunk with the gunner, came in and made a furious attack on me. I
gave him a kick on the face that sent him with great violence on his
back, among the plates and dishes, which had been removed from the
dinner-table and placed between the guns. Enraged, as much at the
laughter against him as at the blow he had received, he snatched up a
carving-fork, and, before any one was aware of his intention, stabbed me
with it four times. I jumped up to punish him, but the moment I got on
my legs, was so stiff, that I fell back into the arms of my mess-mates.
The surgeon examined the wounds, which were serious; two of them nearly
touched an artery. I was put to bed sick, and was three weeks confined
to my berth. The midshipman who had committed this outrage, was very
penitent when sober, and implored my pardon and forgiveness. Naturally
good-natured, I freely forgave, because I was disarmed by submission. I
never trampled on a prostrate foe. The surgeon reported me ill of a
fever, which was true; for had the captain known the real fact, the
midshipman, whose commission was signed, and in the ship, ready to be
delivered to him on his arrival at Bermuda, would certainly have lost
his promotion. My kindness to him, I believe, wounded him more than my
resentment; he became exceedingly melancholy and thoughtful, gave up
drinking, and was ever after greatly attached to me. I reckon this
among the few good actions of my life, and own I have great pleasure in
reflecting upon it.
We arrived at Bermuda soon after, having left the convoy in the latitude
of ten degrees north. The supernumeraries were all discharged into
their respective ships; and before we separated, we had the pleasure to
see the first lieutenant take his passage in a ship bound to England.
Most sincerely did we congratulate ourselves on the success of our
intrigue.