Peregrine, finding himself neglected by Sir Steady Steerwell,
expostulates with him in a Letter; in consequence of which he is forbid
his House, loses his Pension, and incurs the charge of Lunacy.
This prospect of success, together with his expectations from the
minister, whom he did not neglect, helped to comfort him under the
reverse of fortune which he had undergone, and the uncertainty of the
lawsuit, which he still maintained for the recovery of his ten thousand
pounds. The lawyers, indeed, continued to drain his pocket of money,
while they filled his brain with unsubstantial hope; and he was actually
obliged to borrow money from his bookseller, on the strength of the
translation, in order to satisfy the demands of those ravenous harpies,
rather than lay the misanthrope under any difficulties, or have recourse
to his friend Hatchway, who lived at the garrison, entirely ignorant
of his distress. This was not at all alleviated by the arrival of the
Indiaman, in which he had ventured seven hundred pounds, as we have
already observed; for he was given to understand, that the borrower was
left dangerously ill at Bombay when the ship sailed, and that his chance
for retrieving his money was extremely slender.
So situated, it is not to be supposed that he led a life of tranquility,
though he made a shift to struggle with the remonstrances of misfortune.
Yet such a gush of affliction would sometimes rush upon his thought, as
overwhelmed all the ideas of his hope, and sunk him to the very bottom
of despondence. Every equipage that passed him in the street, every
person of rank and fortune that occurred to his view, recalled the gay
images of his former life, with such mortifying reflection as stabbed
him to the very soul. He lived, therefore, incessantly exposed to all
the pangs of envy and disquiet. When I say envy, I do not mean that
sordid passion, in consequence of which a man repines at his neighbour's
success, howsoever deserved: but that self-tormenting indignation which
is inspired by the prosperity of folly, ignorance, and vice. Without the
intervening gleams of enjoyment, which he felt in the conversation of a
few friends, he could not have supported his existence; or, at least,
he must have suffered some violent discomposure of the brain. But one
is still finding some circumstance of alleviation, even in the worst of
conjunctures, and Pickle was so ingenious in these researches, that he
maintained a good battle with disappointment, till the revolution of the
term at which he had received his pension of three hundred pounds.
However, seeing the day elapse without touching his allowance,
notwithstanding his significant method of presenting himself at the
minister's levee, when the year was expired, he wrote a letter to Sir
Steady, reminding him of his situation and promise, and giving him to
understand, that his occasions were such as compelled him to demand
his salary for the ensuing year. In the morning after this letter was
conveyed, the author went to his honour's house, in expectation of being
admitted by particular order; but was mistaken in his hope, the minister
not being visible. He then made his appearance at the levee, in hopes
of being closeted; but, though he took all opportunities of watching Sir
Steady's eyes, he could not obtain one glance, and had the pleasure of
seeing him retire, without being favoured with the least notice. These
circumstances of wilful neglect were not over and above agreeable to our
young hero, who, in the agonies of vexation and resentment, went
home, and composed a most acrimonious remonstrance to his honour; in
consequence of which he was not only deprived of all pretensions to a
private audience, but expressly denied admittance on a public day, by
Sir Steady's own order.
This prohibition, which announced his total ruin, filled him with rage,
horror, and despair. He insulted the porter who signified the minister's
command, threatening to chastise him upon the spot for his presumption,
and vented the most virulent imprecations upon his master, to the
astonishment of those who chanced to enter during this conference.
Having exhausted himself in these vain exclamations, he returned to his
lodgings in a most frantic condition, biting his lips so that the blood
ran from his mouth, dashing his head and fists against the sides of his
chimney, and weeping with the most bitter expressions of woe. Pipes,
whose perception had been just sufficient to let him see that there was
some difference between the present and former situation of his master,
overhearing his transports, essayed to enter his apartment, with a
view of administering consolation; and, finding the door locked on the
inside, desired admittance, protesting, that otherwise he would down
with the bulkhead in the turning of a handspike. Peregrine ordered him
to retire, on pain of his displeasure, and swore, that if he should
offer to break open the door, he would instantly shoot him through
the head. Tom, without paying the least regard to this injunction, set
himself at work immediately. His master, exasperated at his want of
reverence and respect, which in his present paroxysm appeared with the
most provoking aggravation, flew into his closet, and snatching up
one of his pistols already loaded, no sooner saw his valet enter the
apartment, in consequence of having forced the lock, than he presented
it full at his face, and drew the trigger. Happily the priming flashed
in the pan, without communicating with the charge; so that his furious
purpose did not take effect upon the countenance of honest Pipes, who,
disregardful of the attempt, though he knew the contents of the piece,
asked, without the least alteration of feature, if it must be foul
weather through the whole voyage.
Peregrine, mad as he was, repented of his mischievous intent against
such a faithful adherent, in the very moment of execution; and had it
proved fatal, according to the design, in all probability he would have
applied another to his own head. There are certain considerations that
strike upon the mind with irresistible force, even in the midst of
its distraction; the momentary recollection of some particular scene,
occasioned by the features of the devoted victim, hath often struck the
dagger from the assassin's hand. By such an impulse was Pipes protected
from any repeated effort of his master's rage; the friendly cause of his
present disobedience flashed upon the conviction of Peregrine, when he
beheld the rugged front of his valet, in which also stood disclosed
his long and faithful service together with the recommendation of the
deceased commodore. Though his wrath was immediately suppressed, and his
heart torn with remorse for what he had done, his brows remained
still contracted, and darting a most ferocious regard at the intruder,
“Villain!” said he, “how dare you treat me with such disrespect?”
“Why shouldn't I lend a hand for the preservation of the ship,” answered
the unruffled Pipes, “when there is more sail than ballast aboard, and
the pilot quits the helm in despair? What signifies one or two broken
voyages, so long as our timbers are strong, and our vessel in good trim?
If she loses upon one tack, mayhap she may gain upon t'other; and I'll
be d--d, if one day or other we don't fetch up our leeway. As for the
matter of provision, you have started a pretty good stock of money into
my hold, and you are welcome to hoist it up again when you wool.”
Here Tom was interrupted by the arrival of Mr. Crabtree, who seeing
Peregrine with a pistol in his hand, and such wild disorder in his
looks, his head, hands, and mouth besmeared with blood, and, moreover,
smelling the gunpowder which had been burnt, actually believed he had
either committed, or was bent upon murder, and accordingly retreated
down-stairs with infinite despatch. All his speed could not convey him
without the reach of Pipes, who, overtaking him in his passage, carried
him back into his master's apartment, observing by the way, that
this was no time to sheer off, when his consort stood in need of his
assistance.
There was something so ruefully severe in the countenance of
Cadwallader, thus compelled, that, at any other time, our hero would
have laughed at his concern; but at the present there was nothing
risible in his disposition. He had, however, laid aside his pistol, and
endeavoured, though in vain, to compose his internal disturbance; for
he could not utter one syllable to the misanthrope, but stood staring
at him in silence, with a most delirious aspect. This did not tend
to dispel the dismay of his friend, who, after some recollection, “I
wonder,” said he, “that you have never killed your man before. Pray how
may you have disposed of the body?” Pickle having recovered the
faculty of speech, ordered his lacquey out of the room, and, in a most
incoherent detail, made Crabtree acquainted with the perfidious conduct
of the minister.
The confidant was very glad to find his fears disappointed; for he had
really concluded that some life was lost. Perceiving the youth too much
agitated to be treated by him in his usual style, he owned that Sir
Steady was a rascal, and encouraged Pickle with the hope of being one
day able to make reprisals upon him; in the mean time offered him
money for his immediate occasions, exhorted him to exert his own
qualifications in rendering himself independent of such miscreants, and
finally counselled him to represent his wrongs to the nobleman whom he
had formerly obliged, with a view of interesting that peer in his behalf
or at least of obtaining a satisfactory explanation from the minister,
that he might take no premature measures of revenge.
These admonitions were so much milder and more agreeable than our hero
expected from the misanthrope, that they had a very favourable effect
upon his transports, which gradually subsided, until he became so
tractable as to promise that he would conform to his advice; in
consequence of which, he next morning waited upon his lordship, who
received him very politely, as usual, and with great patience heard his
complaint, which, by the bye, he could not repeat without some hasty
ebullitions of passionate resentment. This peer, after having gently
disapproved of the letter of expostulation, which had produced such
unfortunate effects, kindly undertook to recommend his case to the
minister, and actually performed his promise that same day, when Sir
Steady informed him, to his utter astonishment, that the poor young
gentleman was disordered in his brain, so that he could not possibly be
provided for in a place of importance, with any regard to the service;
and it could not be expected that he (Sir Steady) would support his
extravagance from his own private purse; that he had, indeed at the
solicitation of a nobleman deceased, made him a present of three
hundred pounds, in consideration of some loss that he pretended to have
sustained in an election; but, since that time, had perceived in him
such indisputable marks of lunacy, both by his distracted letters and
personal behaviour, as obliged him to give order that he should not be
admitted into the house. To corroborate this assertion, the minister
actually called in the evidence of his own porter, and one of the
gentlemen of his household, who had heard the execrations that escaped
our youth, when he first found himself excluded. In short, the nobleman
was convinced that Peregrine was certainly and bona fide mad as a March
hare; and, by the help of this intimation, began to recollect some
symptoms of distraction which appeared in his last visit; he remembered
a certain incoherence in his speech, a violence of gesture and wildness
of look, that now evidently denoted a disturbed understanding; and he
determined, for his own credit and security, to disentangle himself from
such a dangerous acquaintance.
With this view, he, in imitation of Sir Steady, commanded his gate to be
shut against our adventurer; so that, when he went to know the result of
his lordship's conference with the minister, the door was flung in his
face, and the janitor told him through an iron grate, that he needed not
to give himself the trouble of calling again, for his lord desired to
be excused from seeing him. He spoke not a word in answer to this
declaration, which he immediately imputed to the ill offices of the
minister, against whom he breathed defiance and revenge, in his way to
the lodgings of Cadwallader; who, being made acquainted with the manner
of his reception, begged he would desist from all schemes of vengeance,
until he, Crabtree, should be able to unriddle the mystery of the whole,
which he did not doubt of unveiling by means of his acquaintance with a
family in which his lordship often spent the evening at whist.
It was not long before he had the desired opportunity: the nobleman
being under no injunctions or obligation to keep the affair secret,
discovered the young gentleman's misfortune, by way of news, to the
first company in which he happened to be; and Peregrine's name was not
so obscure in the fashionable world, but that his disorder became the
general topic of conversation for a day; so that his friend soon partook
of the intelligence, and found means to learn the particulars of the
minister's information, as above related. Nay, he was in danger of
becoming a proselyte to Sir Steady's opinion, when he recalled and
compared every circumstance which he knew of Pickle's impatience and
impetuosity. Indeed, nothing more easily gains credit than an imputation
of madness fixed upon any person whatsoever: for when the suspicion of
the world is roused, and its observation once set at work, the wisest,
the coolest man upon earth, will, by some particulars in his behaviour,
convict himself of the charge: every singularity in his dress and manner
(and such are observable in every person), that before passed unheeded,
now rises up in judgment against him, with all the exaggeration of the
observer's fancy; and the sagacious examiner perceives distraction in
every glance of the eye, turn of the finger, and motion of the head.
When he speaks, there is a strange peculiarity in his argument and
expression; when he holds his tongue, his imagination teems with some
extravagant reverie; his sobriety of demeanour is no other than a lucid
interval, and his passion mere delirium.
If people of the most sedate and insipid life and conversation are
subject to such criticisms, no wonder that they should take place upon a
youth of Peregrine's fiery disposition, which, on some occasions, would
have actually justified any remarks of this kind, which his greatest
enemies could make. He was accordingly represented as one of those
enterprising bucks, who, after having spent their fortunes in riot and
excess, are happily bereft of their understanding, and consequently
insensible of the want and disgrace which they have entailed upon
themselves, Cadwallader himself was so much affected with the report,
that for some time he hesitated in his deliberations upon our hero,
before he could prevail upon himself to communicate to him the
information he had received, or to treat him in other respects as a
man of sound intellects. At length, however, he ventured to make Pickle
acquainted with the particulars he had learned, imparting them with such
caution and circumlocution, as he thought necessary to prevent the young
gentleman from transgressing all bounds of temper and moderation; but,
for once, he was agreeably deceived in his prognostic. Incensed as our
hero was at the conduct of the minister, he could not help laughing at
the ridiculous aspersion, which he told his friend he would soon refute
in a manner that should not be very agreeable to his calumniator,
observing, that it was a common practice with the state pilot, thus to
slander those people to whom he lay under obligations which he had no
mind to discharge. “True it is,” said Peregrine “he has succeeded more
than once in contrivances of this kind, having actually reduced divers
people of weak heads to such extremity of despair, as hath issued in
downright distraction, whereby he was rid of their importunities, and
his judgment confirmed at the same time. But I have now, thank Heaven,
attained to such a pitch of philosophical resolution, as will support me
against all his machinations; and I will forthwith exhibit the
monster to the public, in his true lineaments of craft, perfidy, and
ingratitude.”
This indeed was the plan with which Mr. Pickle had amused himself during
the researches of Crabtree; and by this time it so effectually flattered
his imagination, that he believed he should be able to bring his
adversary, in spite of all his power, to his own terms of submission, by
distinguishing himself in the list of those who, at that period, wrote
against the administration. Nor was this scheme so extravagant as it
may seem to be, had not he overlooked one material circumstance, which
Cadwallader himself did not recollect, when he approved of this project.
While he thus meditated vengeance, the fame of his disorder, in due
course of circulation, reached the ears of that lady of quality whose
memoirs have already appeared in these adventures. The correspondence
with which she had honoured our hero had been long broke off for the
reason already advanced, namely, his dread of being exposed to her
infatuating charms. He had been candid enough to make her acquainted
with the cause of exiling himself from her presence; and she admitted
the prudence of self-restraint, although she would have very well
satisfied with the continuance of his intimacy and conversation,
which were not at all beneath the desire of any lady in the kingdom.
Notwithstanding this interruption, she still retained a friendship and
regard for his character, and felt all the affliction of a humane heart,
at the news of his misfortunes and deplorable distemper. She had seen
him courted and cultivated in the sunshine of his prosperity; but she
knew, from sad experience, how all those insect-followers shrink away in
the winter of distress. Her compassion represented him as a poor unhappy
lunatic, destitute of all the necessaries of life, dragging about the
ruins of human nature, and exhibiting the spectacle of blasted youth
to the scorn and abhorrence of his fellow-creatures. Aching with these
charitable considerations, she found means to learn in what part of the
town he lodged and, laying aside all superfluous ceremony, went in a
hackney-chair to his door, which was opened by the ever-faithful Pipes.
Her ladyship immediately recollected the features of his trusty
follower, whom she could not help loving in her heart for his attachment
and fidelity, which after she had applauded with a most gracious
commendation, she kindly inquired after the state of his master's
health, and asked if he was in a condition to be seen. Tom, who could
not suppose that the visit of a fine lady would be unacceptable to a
youth of Peregrine's complexion, made no verbal reply to the question;
but beckoning her ladyship with an arch significance of feature, at
which she could not forbear smiling, walked softly up-stairs; and she,
in obedience to the signal, followed her guide into the apartment of our
hero, whom she found at a writing-table, in the very act of composing
a eulogium upon his good friend Sir Steady. The nature of his work had
animated his countenance with an uncommon degree of vivacity; and being
dressed in a neat deshabille, his figure could not have appeared to more
advantage in the eye of a person who despised the tinsel of unnecessary
ornament. She was extremely well pleased to see her expectations so
agreeably disappointed; for, instead of the squalid circumstances and
wretched looks attending indigence and distraction, everything was
decent and genteel; and the patient's aspect such as betokened internal
satisfaction. Hearing the rustling of silk in his room, he lifted up
his eyes from the paper, and, seeing her ladyship, was struck
with astonishment and awe, as at the unexpected apparition of some
supernatural being.
Before he could recollect himself from his confusion, which called
the blood into his cheeks, she told him that, on the strength of old
acquaintance, she was come to visit him, though it was a long time since
he had given her good reason to believe he had absolutely forgot that
there was such a person as she in being. After having made the most warm
acknowledgments for this unforeseen honour, he assured her ladyship that
the subject of her reproach was not his fault, but rather his very
great misfortune; and that, if it had been in his power to forget her so
easily as she seemed to imagine, he should never have given her cause to
tax him with want of duty and respect.
Still dubious of his situation, she began to converse with him
on different subjects; and he acquitted himself so well in every
particular, that she no longer doubted his having been misrepresented by
the malice of his enemies, and candidly told him the cause and intent
of her coming. He was not deficient in expressions of gratitude for this
instance of her generosity and friendship, which even drew tears from
his eyes. As to the imputation of madness, he explained it so much to
her ladyship's satisfaction, that she evidently perceived he had been
barbarously dealt with, and that the charge was no other than a most
villainous aspersion. Notwithstanding all his endeavours to conceal
the true state of his finances, it was impossible for him to give this
detail, without disclosing some of the difficulties under which he
laboured; and, her ladyship's sagacity divining the rest, she not only
made him a tender of assistance, but, presenting a bank-note for a
considerable sum, insisted upon his acceptance of it as a trifling mark
of her esteem, and a specimen of what she was inclined to do in his
behalf. But this mark of her benevolence he would by no means receive;
assuring her, that, though his affairs were at present a little
perplexed, he had never felt the least circumstance of distress,
and begging that she would not subject him to the burden of such an
unnecessary obligation.
Being obliged to put up with this refusal she protested she would never
forgive him should she ever hear that he rejected her offer when he
stood in need of her aid; or if, in any time to come, he should not
apply to her friendship, if ever he should find himself incommoded in
point of fortune. “An overdelicacy in this respect,” said she, “I shall
look upon as a disapprobation of my own conduct; because I myself have
been obliged to have recourse to my friends in such emergencies.” These
generous remonstrances and marks of particular friendship could not
fail to make a deep impression upon the heart of our hero, which still
smarted from the former impulse of her charms; he not only felt all
those transports which a man of honour and sensibility may be supposed
to feel upon such an occasion, but the sentiments of a more tender
passion awaking in his breast, he could not help expressing himself in
terms adapted to the emotion of his soul; and, at length, plainly told
her, that, were he disposed to be a beggar, he would ask something of
infinitely more importance to his peace than the charitable assistance
she had proffered. Her ladyship had too much penetration to mistake his
meaning; but, as she did not choose to encourage his advances, pretended
to interpret his intimation into a general compliment of gallantry, and,
in a jocose manner, desired he would not give her any reason to believe
his lucid interval was past. “In faith, my lady,” said he, “I perceive
the fit coming on; and I don't see why I may not use the privilege of
my distemper, so far as to declare myself one of your most passionate
admirers.”--“If you do,” replied her ladyship, “I shall not be fool
enough to believe a madman, unless I were assured that your disorder
proceeded from your love; and that this was the case, I suppose you will
find it difficult to prove.”--“Nay, madam,” cried the youth, “I have in
this drawer what will convince you of my having been mad on that strain;
and, since you doubt my pretension, you must give me leave to produce
my testimonials.” So saying, he opened an escrutoire, and taking out a
paper, presented her with the following song, which he had written
in her praise, immediately after he was made acquainted with the
particulars of her story:
I.
While with fond rapture and amaze,
On thy transcendent charms I gaze,
My cautious soul essays in vain
Her peace and freedom to maintain;
yet let that blooming form divine,
Where grace and harmony combine;
Those eyes, like genial orbs that move,
Dispensing gladness, joy, and love;
in all their pomp assail my view,
Intent my bosom to subdue;
My breast, by wary maxims steel'd,
Not all those charms shall force to yield.
II.
But, when invok'd to Beauty's aid,
I see the enlighten'd soul display'd,
That soul so sensibly sedate
Amid the storms of froward fate!
Thy genius active, strong, and clear,
Thy wit sublime, though not severe,
The social ardour, void of art,
That glows within thy candid heart;
My spirits, sense, and strength decay,
My resolution dies away,
And, every faculty oppress'd,
Almighty love invades my breast!
Her ladyship having perused this production, “Were I inclined to
be suspicious,” said she, “I should believe that I had no share in
producing this composition, which seems to have been inspired by a much
more amiable object. However, I will take your word for your intention,
and thank you for the unmerited compliment, though I have met with it
in such an accidental manner. Nevertheless, I must be so free as to tell
you, it is now high time for you to contract that unbounded spirit of
gallantry, which you have indulged so long, into a sincere attachment
for the fair Emilia, who, by all accounts, deserves the whole of your
attention and regard.” His nerves thrilled at mention of that name,
which he never heard pronounced without agitation. Rather than undergo
the consequence of a conversation upon this subject, he chose to drop
the theme of love altogether, and industriously introduced some other
topic of discourse.