He is visited by Pallet--Contracts an Intimacy with a Newmarket
Nobleman, and is by the Knowing Ones taken in.
This affair being settled, and our adventurer, for the present, free of
all female connections, he returned to his former course of fast living
among the bucks of the town, and performed innumerable exploits among
whores, bullies, rooks, constables, and justices of the peace. In
the midst of these occupations, he was one morning visited by his old
fellow-traveller, Pallet, whose appearance gave him equal surprise
and concern. Though the weather was severe, he was clothed in the
thin summer dress which he had worn at Paris, and was now, not only
threadbare, but, in some parts, actually patched; his stockings, by
a repetition of that practice known among economists by the term of
coaxing, hung like pudding-bags about his ankles; his shirt, though new
washed, was of the saffron hue, and, in divers places, appeared through
the crannies of his breeches; he had exchanged his own hair for a
smoke-dried tie-periwig, which all the flour in his dredging-box had
not been able to whiten; his eyes were sunk, his jaws lengthened beyond
their usual extension; and he seemed twenty years older than he
looked when he and our hero parted at Rotterdam. In spite of all these
evidences of decay, he accosted him with a meagre affectation of content
and good-humour, struggled piteously to appear gay and unconcerned,
professed his joy at seeing him in England, excused himself for having
delayed so long to come and present his respects; alleging that, since
his return, he had been a mere slave to the satisfaction of some persons
of quality and taste, who had insisted upon his finishing some pieces
with the utmost expedition.
Peregrine received him with that compassion and complaisance which was
natural to his disposition; inquired about the health of Mrs. Pallet
and his family, and asked if his friend, the doctor, was in town. The
painter seemed to have resumed his resentment against that gentleman, of
whom he spoke in contemptuous terms. “The doctor,” said he, “is so much
overshadowed with presumption and self-conceit, that his merit has no
relief. It does not rise. There is no keeping in the picture, my dear
sir. All the same as if I were to represent the moon under a cloud;
there will be nothing but a deep mass of shade, with a little tiny speck
of light in the middle, which would only serve to make, as it were, the
darkness visible. You understand me. Had he taken my advice, it might
have been better for him; but he is bigoted to his own opinion. You
must know, Mr. Pickle, upon our return to England, I counselled him to
compose a little smart, clever ode upon my Cleopatra. As Gad shall judge
me, I thought it would have been of some service, in helping him out of
obscurity; for you know, as Sir Richard observes,
“Soon will that die, which adds thy fame to mine;
Let me then live, join'd to a work of thine.”
“By the bye, there is a most picturesque contrast in these lines, of thy
and me, living and dying, and thine and mine. Ah! a prize upon it! Dick,
after all, was the man. Ecod! he rounded it off. But, to return to this
unhappy young man, would you believe it, he tossed up his nose at my
friendly proposal, and gabbled something in Greek, which is not worth
repeating. The case was this, my dear sir, he was out of humour at the
neglect of the world. He thought the poets of the age were jealous
of his genius, and strove to crush it accordingly, while the rest
of mankind wanted taste sufficient to discern it. For my own part, I
profess myself one of these; and, as the clown in Billy Shakespeare says
of the courtier's oath, had I sworn by the doctor's genius, that the
pancakes were naught, they might have been for all that very good, yet
shouldn't I have been forsworn. Let that be as it will, he retired from
town in great dudgeon, and set up his rest near a hill in Derbyshire,
with two tops, resembling Parnassus, and a well at the bottom, which he
had christened Hyp-o'-the-Green. Egad! if he stays in that habitation,
'tis my opinion he'll soon grow green with the hip indeed. He'll be glad
of an opportunity to return to the fleshpots of Egypt, and pay his court
to the slighted Queen Cleopatra. Ha! well remembered, by this light!
you shall know, my good sir, that this same Egyptian princess has been
courted by so many gallants of taste, that, as I hope to live, I found
myself in some sort of dilemma, because in parting with her to one, I
should have disobliged all his rivals. Now a man would not choose to
give offence to his friends, at least I lay it down as a maxim to avoid
the smallest appearance of ingratitude. Perhaps I may be in the wrong.
But every man has his way. For this reason, I proposed to all the
candidates, that a lottery or raffle should be set on foot, by which
every individual would have an equal chance for her good graces, and
the prize be left to the decision of fortune. The scheme was mightily
relished, and the terms being such a trifle as half a guinea, the whole
town crowded into my house, in order to subscribe. But there I was their
humble servant. 'Gentlemen, you must have a little patience till my
own particular friends are served.' Among that number, I do myself the
honour to consider Mr. Pickle. Here is a copy of the proposals; and, if
the list should be adorned with his name, I hope, notwithstanding his
merited success among the young ladies, he will for once be shunned by
that little vixen called Miss Fortune! he, he, he!”
So saying, he bowed with a thousand apish congees, and presented his
paper to Peregrine, who, seeing the number of subscribers was limited to
one hundred, said he thought him too moderate in his expectations, as
he did not doubt that his picture would be a cheap purchase at five
hundred, instead of fifty pounds, at which the price was fixed. To this
unexpected remark Pallet answered, that among the connoisseurs he would
not pretend to appraise his picture; but that, in valuing his works, he
was obliged to have an eye to the Gothic ignorance of the age in which
he lived. Our adventurer saw at once into the nature of this raffle,
which was no other than a begging shift to dispose of a paltry piece,
that he could not otherwise have sold for twenty shillings. However, far
from shocking the poor man in distress, by dropping the least hint
of his conjecture, he desired to be favoured with six chances, if the
circumstances of his plan would indulge him so far; and the painter,
after some hesitation, condescended to comply with his request, out of
pure friendship and veneration; though he observed, that, in so doing,
he must exclude some of his most intimate companions. Having received
the money he gave Pickle his address, desiring he would, with his
convenience, visit the princess, who, he was sure, would display her
most engaging attractions, in order to captivate his fancy; and took his
leave extremely well pleased with the success of his application.
Though Peregrine was tempted with the curiosity of seeing this portrait,
which he imagined must contain some analogy to the ridiculous oddity of
the painter, he would not expose himself to the disagreeable alternative
of applauding the performance, contrary to the dictates of conscience
and common sense, or of condemning it, to the unspeakable mortification
of the miserable author; and therefore never dreamt of returning the
painter's visit. Nor did he ever hear of the lottery's being drawn.
About this time he was invited to spend a few weeks at the country seat
of a certain nobleman, with whom he had contracted an acquaintance,
in the course of his debauches, which we have already described. His
lordship being remarkable for his skill and success in horse-racing, his
house was continually filled with the connoisseurs and admirers of that
sport, upon which the whole conversation turned, insomuch that Peregrine
gradually imbibed some knowledge in horse-flesh, and the diversions of
the course; for the whole occupation of the day, exclusive of eating and
drinking, consisted in viewing, managing, and exercising his lordship's
stud.
Our hero looked upon these amusements with an eye of taste as well as
curiosity; he contemplated the animal as a beautiful and elegant part of
the creation, and relished the surprising exertion of its speed with
a refined and classical delight. In a little time he became personally
acquainted with every horse in the stable, and interested himself in the
reputation of each; while he also gratified his appetite for knowledge,
in observing the methods of preparing their bodies, and training them to
the race. His lordship saw and encouraged his eagerness, from which he
promised himself some advantage; he formed several private matches for
his entertainment, and flattered his discernment, by permitting him to
be successful in the first bets he made. Thus was he artfully decoyed
into a spirit of keenness and adventure, and disposed to depend upon his
own judgment, in opposition to that of people who had made horse-racing
the sole study of their lives. He accompanied my lord to Newmarket, and,
entering at once into the genius of the place, was marked as fair game,
by all the knowing ones there assembled, many of whom found means
to take him in, in spite of all the cautions and admonitions of his
lordship, who wanted to reserve him for his own use.
It is almost impossible for any man, let him be never so fearful or
phlegmatic, to be an unconcerned spectator in this busy scene. The demon
of play hovers in the air, like a pestilential vapour, tainting the
minds of all present with infallible infection, which communicates
from one person to another, like the circulation of a general panic.
Peregrine was seized with this epidemic distemper to a violent degree;
and, after having lost a few loose hundreds, in his progress through the
various rookeries of the place, entered into partnership with his noble
friend in a grand match, upon the issue of which he ventured no less
than three thousand pounds. Indeed he would not have risked such a
considerable sum, had not his own confidence been reinforced by the
opinion and concurrence of his lordship, who hazarded an equal bet upon
the same event. These two associates engaged themselves in the penalty
of six thousand pounds, to run one chaise and four against another,
three times round the course; and our adventurer had the satisfaction of
seeing his antagonist distanced in the first and second heat; but, all
of a sudden, one of the horses of his machine was knocked up, by which
accident the victory was ravished almost from his very grasp, and he was
obliged to endure the damage and the scorn.
He was deeply affected with this misfortune, which he imputed to his
own extravagance and temerity; but discovered no external signs of
affliction, because his illustrious partner bore his loss with the most
philosophic resignation, consoling himself, as well as Pickle, with the
hope of making it up on some other occasion. Nevertheless, our young
gentleman could not help admiring, and even envying his equanimity, not
knowing that his lordship had managed matters so as to be a gainer by
the misfortune; which to retrieve, Peregrine purchased several horses,
at the recommendation of his friend; and, instead of returning to
London, made a tour with him to all the celebrated races in England, at
which, after several vicissitudes of fortune, he made shift, before the
end of the season, to treble his loss.
But his hopes seemed to increase with his ill-luck. In the beginning of
winter he came to town, fully persuaded that fortune must necessarily
change, and that next season he should reap the happy fruits of his
experience. In this confidence, he seemed to drown all ideas of prudence
and economy. His former expense was mere parsimony, compared with that
which he now incurred. He subscribed to the opera, and half a dozen
concerts at different parts of the town; was a benefactor to several
hospitals; purchased a collection of valuable pictures; took a house,
and furnished it in a most magnificent taste, laid in a large stock
of French wines, and gave extravagant entertainments to his quality
friends, who, in return, loaded him with compliments, and insisted upon
his making use of their interest and goodwill.