go to a meeting, and how long you shall stay, to inquire, Will this
best prepare me to be patient, long-suffering, meek, industrious and
faithful in all my duties?
And if you think, that by going, you shall run the risk of injuring
your health, and so of lessening your usefulness, or that you shall
stay so late as to be tired and sleepy next morning, or unfitted in
any way to perform your duties well, I pray you not to go. And if you
think that religious privileges do not tend to make you more and more
like Christ, I beseech you remember the dreadful condemnation of those
who are exalted by privileges even to Heaven, only to be thrust down to
Hell.
Now I hope you will not misunderstand what I have said. I do not say
that you or any body else go to meetings too much, or think too much
of religious teachings, singing and prayer. I am afraid that most of
us do not value these blessed means enough. But I am afraid that there
are many of you who look upon these things as religion, when in reality
they are nothing but the means God has appointed, in order to lead us
to become religious. A true Christian, a really converted person, is
one who is making it the _chief_ interest and aim of life to become
like Christ, and all these religious means are of no use, except so far
as they tend to produce conformity of heart and life to the precepts
and example of Christ.
If this be the case, then persons who go to meetings to meet
companions, or to while away time, or to get their feelings wrought up
to a high state, and do not use their religious privileges as means
to make them more humble, submissive, gentle, kind, industrious and
faithful in every duty, are making their blessings a curse.
And when you take time from your ordinary employments, or time from the
hours usually given to sleep, I hope you will always ask yourselves
this question: “Am I going to this meeting in order that I may come
home and be more and more like Jesus Christ?” And if you do not find
that this is your reason for going, beware lest the awful condemnation
that awaits those who abuse and pervert religious privileges, fall upon
your guilty head.
And here I would add, that no rule can be given as to how much we
ought to attend religious exercises. Some persons are reflective, and
serious, and remember and feel what they hear a great while. Others
are light, trifling and forgetful, and very soon lose any serious
impressions. The first class do not need such frequent instructions
and opportunities as the last class. And every person must judge for
herself, how much time and attention is needful for her to give to
religious duties, and not be censorious on others, who think it best
for them to take another course.
LETTER XI.
ON HEALTH.
Importance of health to domestics. Modes by which they injure
health.
My Friends:
Much of the ill health among persons in your employment is entirely
needless. You have employments, usually, that tend to strengthen the
constitution and maintain firm health, and as a class you have far more
health and strength than those who do not labour.
Now, good health is the greatest of all blessings, for without it, no
matter how many other blessings we have, we cannot enjoy life. Many and
many a woman in this land, who has wealth, and ease, and education, and
friends, and every thing that wealth can purchase, goes about gloomy
and sick at heart, because disease has spread its dark shroud over all
the enjoyments of life.
But it is a far greater misfortune to persons in your situation to lose
health, than to persons who have wealth and a comfortable home.
When you are sick, you have no parents or family friends around you,
to nurse and sympathize; you know that the family you live in have not
only lost your services, but are obliged to wait upon you, and you feel
that you are a burden. You may have no home to go to, or your home may
be so comfortless that you had rather stay among strangers; your wages
stop, and if you have any little earnings laid up, they must go to pay
for medicines and a physician.
All these things make it of the utmost consequence, that you take good
care of your health. And yet, I am sorry to say, that I know of no
class of persons who seem to be so careless and imprudent in regard
to health. We see domestics go out from the wash-tub in a profuse
perspiration, to stand in the wind and hang out wet clothes, and that
too, without any thing on the head, or any shawl or cloak on. We see
them go out in leaky shoes and wet their feet, and then sit a whole
evening in company, or a meeting, with their feet wet and cold.
We see them sleeping in close chambers, or sitting hour after hour in
crowded rooms for religious worship, breathing an atmosphere that is
absolutely poisonous, without knowing that they are thus injuring their
health. And there are many other ways in which they are wearing down
their constitutions, without being aware of it.
I do not think I can possibly make you feel the importance of the
advice I am about to offer, without your understanding more than you
do, about the construction of your own bodies. And I wish I could get
you to read a few chapters in a book I have written called “Domestic
Economy,” in which I have described how the interior of your bodies is
formed, and drawn pictures to explain what I say, so that I think you
could easily understand the matter. And if you ever come across that
work, I hope you will read the Chapter on the Care of Health, and the
five or six chapters that follow it.
But I will here tell you some things, which I think you can understand
without any pictures.
You know that we take food and drink into our stomach to support
and continue life. Now this food is changed into a soft mass in the
stomach, and then passes through long winding intestines, that are
folded up below the stomach. As it passes through these intestines,
there are multitudes of little hollow tubes, small as hairs, that pump
out the nourishment and carry it to a particular blood-vessel, when
it is emptied into the heart, and mixes with the blood. This is the
way the blood is constantly renewed. Now it is the blood that thus
conveys strength and nourishment to every part of the body. There is
no part of the body, within or without, that has not a vast many small
blood-vessels, running in every direction, that carry the blood to
nourish all parts. But there are more blood-vessels in the skin than
anywhere else, so that the quantity of blood in our skin is greater
than all that is to be found, in all the rest of the body put together.
All the matter received from our food which is nourishing and useful,
is taken up by the different parts of the body, and the rest is thrown
out by the lungs, the bowels, the bladder and the skin. When we draw
air into our lungs, the noxious and useless portions of the blood in
the lungs, combine with it, and are then sent out of our lungs. The
bowels and bladder also, eject a portion of useless matter from the
body. But the chief labour of relieving the body from useless matter in
the blood, is done by the skin.
If you could look at the skin through a microscope, you would see
the little mouths of the blood-vessels all over the skin, which are
constantly pouring out this useless matter from the blood. If, in a
warm day, you bring a cool mirror near your skin, yet not so as to
touch it, you will see a thin dew, or vapour, settle on the mirror.
This is the invisible exhalation, which is constantly coming out from
the mouths of the small blood-vessels, all over the skin. Experiments
have often been made, to find out how much matter is thus thrown out
of the body by the skin, and it is found that in a grown person, it is
never less than a pound and a quarter in twenty-four hours, and most
men that have experimented say that it is much more. But all agree,
that the skin throws out more of the useless and noxious matter from
the body, than the lungs, bladder and bowels all together.
You can now understand the evil done by sitting with wet feet, or going
into cold and damp air without proper covering. Cold always operates to
make the skin shrink up, and the little mouths of the blood-vessels are
thus closed, so that the skin cannot perform its office properly. In
consequence of this, the blood is not relieved of its noxious matter.
The effect of this, is sometimes one thing, and sometimes another.
Sometimes, stopping the action of the skin produces a fever, and then
the body is tormented with restlessness, pain and heat. Sometimes,
when the skin stops its labours, the other organs try to do double
duty, to relieve the body. In this case, either the bowels or bladder
become affected and discharge profusely, or the lungs accumulate a
great quantity of this useless matter, which is coughed up in the form
of phlegm. Sometimes the head and throat are affected, and water runs
from the eyes and nose, while the lungs also cough up phlegm. What is
commonly called a cold in the head, or a cold on the lungs, is caused
by the shutting up of the blood-vessels of the skin by cold, so that
the lungs, eyes, and head are obliged to perform a part of the offices
that the skin ordinarily performs.
Now when a person is labouring by a fire, or at washing or ironing,
the blood is made to circulate much faster, and the noxious matter is
thrown out more abundantly. At such times the matter thrown out by the
skin becomes visible in the form of drops of sweat. Of course the more
of this matter is to be thrown out by the skin, the more dangerous it
is to have the openings of the skin shrunk up by cold. Therefore, it is
very important for persons who labour, to take very great care not to
allow themselves to be chilled when in a state of perspiration. Wetting
the feet often produces the same effect on the body, as chilling the
skin in a perspiration. You understand now, why it is that I earnestly
entreat you, never to go out and stand in the cold, when you are in a
perspiration, and always to be careful to dress warm whenever you go
out doors for any purpose, and never to sit with damp feet. One single
act of carelessness in these respects, may bring on a fever, or a bowel
complaint, or an affection of the lungs, or liver, or eyes, or head,
that may lay you up for months, or even end your life. What I have told
you about the construction of the skin, shows the importance of another
piece of advice I would give you. Do you know, that we are almost the
only well informed nation in the world, that do not frequently wash
the body _all over_? There were some nations in old times, that knew
that this was so important to health and comfort, that they always had
public baths made, so that rich and poor might bathe every day without
expense. And in many countries, the best informed people would not
think of going two days without washing the whole of their bodies, any
more than you would think of going so long, without washing your face
and hands. And the reason of this is, that the skin is interrupted in
its duties by any accumulation of matter upon it. The little mouths
of the blood-vessels must be kept open and free, or they cannot fully
perform their offices. Now, as the skin throws out at least a pound
and a half a day, of this useless and noxious matter, where the
clothing comes tight to the skin, it cannot all pass off freely, and a
part is deposited on the skin. This ought to be washed off every day,
or else the skin has its pores to some extent filled up, and its duties
are impeded. In consequence of this, humours on the skin, or in the
eyes, or some affection of the head, or lungs, or liver, or bowels, or
some other part of the body, often ensue. Some people have such strong
constitutions, that they can bear to go all their lives, and never wash
their bodies properly, and yet never seem to experience any injury,
but there is no doubt that many are suffering painful and troublesome
affections, that never would have come upon them, if they had taken
proper care of their skin. For this reason I advise you to keep a bowl
and pitcher of water in your room, and to sponge your body all over
when you go to bed, either in lukewarm or cold water. It will not take
you more than ten minutes, and it may save you from much trouble.
I have told you, that the lungs also are employed to help purify the
blood. It is done in this way. The air we breathe is made so, that
when it comes into the lungs, it combines with the noxious portions of
the blood in the lungs, and then is returned again, when we breathe
out the air. If, therefore, a person is shut up in a small, close room
for a long time, the air of the room, after a while, is filled with
this injurious matter which is sent out of the lungs. In this state
it is unfit to breathe. Breathing it sometimes produces drowsiness,
weakness, stupidity of feelings, and sometimes sickness at the stomach,
or fainting. Indeed, there is no suffering so horrible as that produced
by breathing air, which is _entirely_ made of air breathed from the
lungs. To illustrate this, I will mention a case of some gentlemen, who
were once shut up by a cruel tyrant in a very small room, with a very
little window in it. There were so many that they had not room to lie
down or even sit, and in a few hours, so many breaths had filled the
room entirely, with this noxious vapor. The distress thus produced was
horrible. They groaned and screamed for mercy to the guard of soldiers.
They begged them to shoot them and put an end to their torments. At
length they began to fight, to get at the only opening there was for
air, and struggled and fought for breath, and tried to strangle each
other, till all were dead except the few, who could get their faces
near the window; and these in the morning had not strength to stand,
and looked more like corpses than like living men.
There is nothing, then, more pernicious to health, than sitting, or
sleeping in rooms where the air is loaded with the air breathed out of
the lungs. For this reason, I advise you never to go to bed, till you
have secured a good supply of pure air. Open your door into an entry,
or make a crack in your window, or contrive some other way to keep pure
air in your room. If you have an open fire-place, this is sufficient,
as then, the fresh air falls down the chimney from out doors. But if
you have a close stove in your room, or have a room with no fire-place,
be sure always to have your door open, or a small opening in your
window. If you do not take this precaution, though you may not feel
the evil, because it is so slow and gradual, you may be sure that your
constitution is gradually growing weaker, so that diseases will more
easily be induced, and thus that your life will be shortened. One other
thing about the lungs. Any person who wears clothing so tight, that
they cannot expand the chest as easily as they can when undressed, is
doing the same sort of mischief. When the waist is constrained by tight
clothing, some parts of the lungs are so impeded and compressed, that
the air cannot enter the air vessels. The consequence is, the blood is
not properly purified, and often, from this cause, ulcers form in the
lungs. Tight dressing is one of the most frequent causes of consumption
and dyspepsia, for dyspepsia is often brought on by such tightness of
dress, that the stomach and the other organs around it, are impeded in
their duties.
It is very important for health, that persons who labour should have
enough sleep, and it is also important that they do not sleep too much.
If they do not sleep enough, the strength and health slowly decay, and
if they sleep too much, the same effect is produced. Seven or eight
hours, is the amount of sleep that is needed by persons who labour,
and none ought to sleep more than eight hours, unless they are sick.
If you will take care of your teeth, by washing them with fair water
and a brush, when you go to bed and get up, you probably will save
yourselves from teeth-ache, and from the early loss of teeth. Not that
this care will always prevent these evils. A disordered stomach, or a
weakness of the nerves, will often induce pain and decay, for which
there is no prevention, or remedy. But your chances of keeping your
teeth, and of escaping tooth-ache, are much increased by removing with
a brush, every night and morning, the tartar which the spittle deposits
on the teeth and gums, during the night and through the day. This
tartar injures the gums, and tends to make the teeth decay.
There are some other causes of ill health that I will point out. One
is, drinking strong tea or coffee. These drinks always stimulate the
nervous system, in a way similar to the effects of intoxicating drinks,
and though they are not so injurious or dangerous, yet, in many cases,
they produce weak nerves, indigestion, teeth-ache, head-ache, and
various nervous complaints. If, then, you use these drinks, I advise
you to use them very weak. In my youth I did not love them, but after
I was twenty, I learned to love them quite strong, and did not love
them weak. When I was convinced that they were injurious, I began to
drink them very weak; and though at first they seemed very flat, I
persevered, until I learned to love them weak, and now I do not love
them strong. I mention this to show that our taste can be changed. I
advise you therefore to try the experiment, and after you have drank
them a month or two very weak, I think you will love them as well as
you now love them strong. At any rate, you will escape the dangers that
always attend the use of tea and coffee, as most persons drink them.
And I believe that it is _sinful_ to run any risk of injuring one’s
health, for the sake of drinking what we love best, when another drink
is just as good for us, and is far more safe.
In regard to eating, I believe a person in health, who labours all day,
may eat almost any thing with safety. But a person in delicate health,
or with a disordered stomach, ought to be careful to notice what food
produces uncomfortable feelings, and avoid it. For nothing wears down
health faster, than to eat food that the stomach cannot digest, and
when this occurs a warning is often given by unpleasant feelings after
eating.
Eating too often, is a frequent cause of disease. This is done, because
people do not know how hard the stomach has to work, after food is
put into it. But if we could look within us at all that is going on,
we should see, that as soon as any food is put into the stomach, its
muscles are all set to work to move the food about and mix it with the
gastric juice which is to dissolve it, so that the stomach actually is
working as hard as the arms would work, in sweeping or in hammering at
the anvil. Now the stomach needs to rest awhile, after its work, and
therefore, four or five hours ought to elapse after eating, before any
more food is put into the stomach. This gives time for the stomach to
do up its work, and have a little time to rest. But a person, who is
frequently putting food into the stomach, keeps it at work all the
time, and thus it becomes weak and disordered from over-working. For
this reason, I advise you not to eat except at your regular meals.
If you have weak eyes, always shade them from the glare of the fire or
candles in the evening, and never use them before breakfast either to
read or sew. The eyes are weaker before breakfast than at any other
time. The reason is, that they have been long shut up, so as to be
unused to the light, and sleep always weakens the body to a certain
extent, until a new supply of food gives the blood the nourishment it
has lost, by the exhalations of the body during the night.
Taking food or drink very warm, is injurious to the teeth and stomach.
If you should hold one of your fingers in hot water, half an hour,
three times a day, you would find that it was very much weakened. The
same effect is produced on the nerves of the mouth, teeth, and stomach,
by the use of hot food and drinks. Pepper, mustard, and spices also
tend to injure the health of the stomach, by stimulating it too much.
LETTER XII.
ON DRESS, MANNERS, AND LANGUAGE.
Dress should be conformed to means and to occupations. Rules of
good manners.
My Friends:
I have shown you, in a former letter, that the chief reason why so much
difference is made, between domestics and other members of the family,
is their deficiencies in education, dress and manners. If domestics
were universally well educated and well bred, and if they paid a proper
attention to their dress and persons, then parents would feel that
their example would be useful instead of injurious to children, while
their presence would be agreeable and not offensive to visitors.
It is therefore very desirable, on your own account, and that you
may raise the respectability of your station, (as well as on account
of parents and children,) that you pay great attention to these
particulars.
I will therefore point out some of those respects, in which you need
to attend to your manners, in order to be a good example to children,
and to be fitted to appear well in any society in which in after life
you may appear.
_Good manners are the outward expression of kindness and good will_,
by which we endeavour to promote the enjoyment of others, and to avoid
all that gives needless pain. Good manners lead us to avoid every
thing that offends the taste of others, and to regard all the rules of
politeness and propriety. Good manners lead us to avoid all rude and
coarse language or actions, and to refrain from all remarks that would
trouble those about us in any way.
I will now point out some particulars. In the first place, there are
rules of good manners in regard to our superiors in age, character,
station or office, which demand attention. In addressing such, it is
proper to speak in a respectful tone and manner, and to add “sir” and
“ma’am” to “yes” and “no” when we reply to them. This should be done
by young persons to older ones, by children to parents, by scholars to
teachers, and by domestics to their employers, and to visitors in the
family. At the same time, it is proper to offer the best accommodations
of all kinds to one who is thus to be treated as a superior.
Another rule of good manners is, to return thanks to any person who
does us any kindness. It is deemed very ill bred to receive a present,
or any little act of attention, without any manifestation of pleasure
or gratitude.
Another rule is, never to use what belongs to another without asking
leave, and never to ask questions about the business or dress, or
concerns of other people, unless we are on intimate terms with them.
Another rule of good breeding is, never to make remarks to others on
their personal defects, or dress, or faults, and never to speak in such
a way of their opinions, or their friends, as to vex or mortify them.
Always, when persons speak to you, look them in the face, and reply
in a courteous manner. Never laugh or whisper in company so that
others cannot hear, lest they may imagine that you are ridiculing
them, or speaking against them. Loud laughing and talking in company,
and whispering, and smiling at church, are deemed rude and vulgar.
Interrupting a person when talking, and flatly contradicting, are
considered rude.
There are some _personal tricks_ which should be avoided, as vulgar and
offensive, such as fingering the hair, picking the teeth, or cleaning
the nails, picking the nose, spitting on the floor, snuffing, instead
of using the handkerchief, or using the handkerchief in a disgusting
manner, fingering the shoes, throwing about the feet, lolling on
chairs, tipping chairs backward, staring at people, calling persons by
nicknames, running out bareheaded into the street, calling to persons
in the street, running in the street, and eating in the street, or in a
public assembly.