The posatiff man bets hiz last dollar on a kard and looses, and then
tells yu he knew he shouldn't win.
He alwus knows what will happen 3 weeks from now, and if it don't happen
he knew that too.
If he falls down on the ice and breaks hiz leg it want an accident, it
waz sumthing that couldn't help but happen.
He iz az certain ov everything az a mule iz anxious tew hit what he
kicks at.
Yu kant tell him ennything new, nor ennything old, he iz more certain ov
things than Webster's unabridged dickshionary.
The less certain yu are the more posatiff he iz.
He never made but one blunder in hiz life and that turned out at last
tew be a good hit.
The posatiff man haz too little cunning tew be very malishus, he iz
generally happy, bekauze he iz posatiff ov it, and tho he gits things
wrong oftner than he duz right, people are pleazed at hiz blunders
bekauze he iz so much in earnest.