affected an air of gaiety; and looked at the old woman with a forced
smile. “You were right,” said he, “when you said that I should
find a very fine, agreeable, and charming young lady. How much am I
obliged to you for it!”--“Oh, this is nothing yet,” replied
the old woman, “let her alone, and you will see a very different
thing by and by.”--The young lady then spoke: “You are a brave
man,” said she to my brother, “and I am delighted at finding in
you so much kindness and complaisance towards all my little
fooleries, and that you possess a disposition so conformable to
mine.”--“Madam,” replied Bakbarah, ravished with this speech,
“I am no longer myself, but am entirely at your disposal; you have
full power to do with me as you please.”--“You afford me the
greatest happiness,” added the lady, “by showing so much
submission to my inclination. I am perfectly satisfied with you; and
I wish that you should be equally so with me. Bring,” cried she to
the attendants, “perfumes and rose-water.” At these words two
slaves went out and instantly returned, one with a silver vase, in
which there was exquisite aloe-wood, with which she perfumed him,
and the other with rose-water, which she sprinkled over his face and
hands. My brother could not contain himself for joy, at seeing
himself so handsomely and honorably treated.
When this ceremony was finished, the young lady commanded the
slaves, who had before sung and played, to recommence their
concerts. They obeyed, and while this was going on, the lady called
another slave, and ordered her to take my brother with her, saying,
“you know what to do, and when you have finished, return with him
to me.” Bakbarah, who heard this order given, immediately got up,
and going towards the old woman, who had also risen to accompany the
slave, he requested her to tell him what they wished him to do.
“Our mistress,” replied she, in a whisper, “is extremely
curious; and she wishes to see how you would look disguised as a
female; this slave, therefore, has orders to take you with her, to
paint your eyebrows, shave your mustachios, and dress you like a
woman.”--“You may paint my eyebrows,” said my brother, “as
much as you please; to that I readily agree, because I can wash them
again; but as to shaving me, that, mind you, I will by no means
suffer. How do you think I dare appear without my
mustachios?”--“Take care,” answered the woman, “how you
oppose any thing that is required of you. You will quite spoil your
fortune, which is going on as prosperously as possible. She loves
you, and wishes to make you happy. Will you, for the sake of a
paltry mustachio, forego the most delicious favors any man can
possibly enjoy?”
Bakbarah at length yielded to the old woman’s arguments; and,
without saying another word, he suffered the slave to conduct him to
an apartment, where they painted his eyebrows red. They shaved his
mustachios, and were absolutely going to shave his beard. But the
easiness of my brother’s temper did not carry him quite so far as
to suffer that. “Not a single stroke,” he exclaimed, “shall
you take at my beard.” The slave represented to him, that it was
of no use to have cut off his mustachios, if he would not also agree
to lose his beard: that a hairy countenance did not at all coincide
with the dress of a woman; and that she was astonished, that a man
who was on the very point of possessing the most beautiful woman in
Bagdad, should care for his beard. The old woman also joined with
the slave, and added fresh reasons; she threatened my brother with
being quite in disgrace with her mistress. In short, she said so
much, that he at last permitted them to do what they wished.
As soon as they had dressed him like a woman, they brought him back
to the young lady, who burst into so violent a fit of laughter at
the sight of him, that she fell down on the sofa in which she was
sitting. The slaves all began to clap their hands, so that my
brother was put quite out of countenance. The young lady then got
up, and continuing to laugh all the time, said, “After the
complaisance you have shown to me, I should be guilty of a crime not
to bestow my whole heart upon you; but it is necessary that you
should do one thing more for love of me; it is only to dance before
me as you are.” He obeyed; and the young lady and the slaves
danced with him, laughing all the while, as if they were crazy.
After they had danced for some time, they all threw themselves upon
the poor wretch, and gave him so many blows, both with their hands
and feet, that he fell down almost fainting. The old woman came to
his assistance, and without giving him time to be angry at such
ill-treatment, she whispered in his ear, “Console yourself, for
you are now arrived at the conclusion of your sufferings, and are
about to receive the reward for them. You have only one thing more
to do,” added she, “and that is a mere trifle. You must know
that my mistress makes it her custom, whenever she has drank a
little, as she has done to-day, not to suffer any one she loves to
come near her, unless they are stripped to their shirt. When they
are in this situation, she takes advantage of a short distance, and
begins running before them through the gallery, and from room to
room, till they have caught her. This is one of her fancies. Now, at
whatever distance from you she may start, you, who are so light and
active, can easily overtake her. Undress yourself, therefore,
quickly, and remain in your shirt, and do not make any difficulty
about it.”
My brother had already carried his complying humour too far to stop
at this. The young lady at the same time took off her robe in order
to run with greater ease, and remained only in her drawers. When
they were both ready to begin the race, the lady took the advantage
of about twenty paces, and then started with wonderful celerity. My
brother followed her with all his strength; but not without exciting
the risibility of the slaves, who kept clapping their hands all the
time. The young lady, instead of losing any of the advantage she had
first taken, kept continually gaining ground of my brother. She ran
round the gallery two or three times, then turned off down a long
dark passage, where she saved herself by a turn of which my brother
was ignorant. Bakbarah, who kept constantly following her, lost
sight of her in this passage; and he was also obliged to run much
slower, because it was so dark. He at last perceived a light,
towards which he made all possible haste; he went out through a
door, which was instantly shut upon him.
You may easily imagine what was his astonishment, at finding himself
in the middle of a street inhabited by curriers. Nor were they less
surprised at seeing him in his shirt, his eyebrows painted red, and
without either beard or mustachios. They began to clap their hands,
to hoot at him; and some even ran after him, and kept lashing him
with strips of their leather. They then stopped him, and set him on
an ass, which they accidentally met with, and led him through the
city, exposed to the laughter and shouts of the mob.
To complete his misfortune, they led him through the street where
the judge of the police lived, and this magistrate immediately sent
to inquire into the cause of the uproar. The curriers informed him
that they saw my brother, exactly in the state he then was, come out
of the gate leading to the apartments of the women belonging to the
grand vizier, which opened into their street. The judge then ordered
the unfortunate Bakbarah, upon the spot, to receive a hundred
strokes upon the soles of his feet, to be conducted without the
city, and forbid him ever to enter it again.
This, Commander of the Faithful, said I to the caliph Mostanser
Billah, is the history of my second brother, which I wished to
relate to your majesty. He knew not, poor fellow, that the ladies of
our great and powerful lords amuse themselves by making such fun as
this with any young man, who is silly enough to trust himself in
their hands.
The barber then went on without any interruption to the history of
his third brother.
THE HISTORY
OF THE BARBER’S THIRD BROTHER.
Commander of the Faithful (said he to the caliph) my third brother,
who was called Bakbac, was quite blind, and his destiny was so
wretched, he was reduced to beg, and passed his life in going from
door to door, asking charity. He had been accustomed to walk through
the streets alone for so long a time, that he had no occasion for
any one to lead him. He always used to knock at the different doors,
and never to answer till they came and opened them.
He happened one day to knock at the door of a house, the master of
which was quite alone. “Who is there?” he called out. My brother
made no answer, but knocked a second time. Again did the master of
the house inquire who was at the door, but no one answered. He then
came down, opened the door, and asked my brother what he wanted.
“That you will bestow something upon me for the love of God,”
answered Bakbac.--“You seem to me to be blind,” said the master
of the house. “Alas, it is true,” replied my brother, “Hold
out your hand,” cried the other. My brother, supposing it was to
receive something, immediately put his hand out; but the master of
the house only took hold of it to assist him in going up-stairs to
his apartment. Bakbac imagined it was for the purpose of giving him
some food; as that had often happened to him at other houses. When
they were both in the chamber, the master of the house let my
brother’s hand go, and sat down in his place; he then again asked
him what it was he wanted. “I have already told you,” replied
Bakbac, “that I request a trifle of you, for the love of
God.”--“My good blind man,” answered the master, “all I can
do for you is to wish that God would restore your sight to
you.”--“You might have told me that at the door,” said my
brother, and spared me the difficulty of coming
up-stairs.”--“And why, good innocent man as you are,” replied
the other, “did you not answer me after you had knocked the first
time, and when I asked you what you wanted? What is the reason you
give people the trouble of coming down to open the door, when they
speak to you?”--“What then do you mean to do for me?” said
Bakbac.--“I tell you again,” replied the master, “that I have
nothing to give you?”--“Help me at least to go down again, as
you brought me up,” said my brother.”--“The staircase is
before you,” answered he, “and if you wish it, you may go down
alone.” My brother then began to descend, but missing his step
about half way down, he fell to the bottom, and bruised his head and
strained his loins very much. He got up, but not without pain, and
went away muttering at and abusing the master of the house, who did
nothing but laugh at his fall.
As he was going from the house, two of his companions, who were also
blind, happened to pass by, and knew his voice. They stopped to ask
him what success he had met with: on which he told them what had
just befallen him; and added, that he had received nothing during
the whole day. “I conjure you,” continued he, “to accompany me
home, that I may, in your presence, take some of the money which we
have in store among us, to buy something for my supper.” The two
blind men agreed to it, and he conducted them home.
It is necessary in this place to observe, that the man of the house
in which my brother had been so ill-treated, was a thief, and by
nature both cunning and malicious. He had overheard, by means of his
window, what Bakbac had said to his comrades; he therefore came down
stairs and followed them; and went with them, unobserved, into an
old woman’s house, where my brother lodged. As soon as they were
seated, Bakbac said to the other two, “We must shut the door,
brothers, and take care that there is no stranger among us.” At
these words the robber was very much embarrassed; but perceiving a
rope that hung from a beam in the middle of the room, he took hold
of it, and suspended himself in the air while the blind men shut the
door and felt all round the room with their sticks. When this
ceremony was concluded, and they were again seated, he let go the
rope and sat down by the side of my brother, without making any
noise. The latter thinking there was no one besides his blind
companions thus addressed them: “As you have made me, comrades,
the banker for all the money we three have collected for a long time
past, I wish to prove to you that I am not unworthy of the trust you
have reposed in me. The last time we reckoned, you know we had ten
thousand drachms, and we put them into ten bags: I will now show you
that I have not touched one of them.” Having said this, he put his
hands among some old rags and clothes, and drew out the ten bags,
one after the other; and giving them to his companions, “Here,”
said he, “are all the bags, and you may judge by the weight, that
they are quite full; or you may count them if you like it better.”
They answered that they were perfectly satisfied with his honesty.
He then opened one of the bags, and took out ten drachms, and the
other two blind men did the same.
After this my brother replaced the bags in the same spot. One of the
blind men then said, there was no occasion for them to spend any
thing for supper that night, as he had received, from the charity of
some good people, sufficient provisions for all three; he instantly
took out of his wallet some bread, cheese, and fruit, and put all of
them upon a table. They then began to eat; and the robber, who sat
on the right hand of my brother, chose the best, and eat of every
thing with them: but in spite of all the precaution he used to avoid
making the least noise, Bakbac heard him chew, and instantly
exclaimed, “We are lost; there is a stranger among us.” While he
was saying this he stretched out his hand, and seized the robber by
the arm. He then threw himself upon him; calling out Thief! and
giving him many blows with his fist. The other blind men also
instantly called out, and beat the robber, who on his part defended
himself as well as he could. As he was both strong and active, and
had the advantage of seeing where he placed his blows, he laid about
him most furiously, first on one and then the other, whenever he was
able, and called out “Thieves, robbers,” more clamorously than
his enemies.
The neighbours immediately assembled at the noise, broke open the
door, and had much difficulty to separate the combatants. Having at
last put an end to the fray, they inquired the cause of their
disagreement. “Gentlemen,” cried my brother, who had not yet let
the robber go, “this man, whom I have got hold of is a thief, who
came in here with us for the purpose of robbing us of the little
money we possess.” The robber, who as soon as he saw the people
enter, had shut his eyes, and pretended to be blind, said, “He is
a liar, gentlemen; and I swear by the name of God, and by the life
of the caliph, that I am one of their companions and associates, and
that they refuse to give me the share which belongs to me. They all
three set themselves against me, and I demand justice.” The
neighbours, who did not wish to interfere with their disputes,
carried them all four before the judge of the police.
When they were come before this magistrate, the robber, still
pretending to be blind, without waiting till they were interrogated,
said, “Since you, my lord, have been appointed to administer
justice in behalf of the caliph, whose power may God prosper, I will
declare to you that we are all equally culpable. But as we have
pledged ourselves under an oath, not to reveal any thing except we
receive the bastinado, if you wish to be informed of our crime, you
have only to order it to be given to us; and you may begin with
me.” My brother now wished to speak, but they compelled him to
hold his tongue. They then began to bastinado the robber.
He had the resolution to bear twenty or thirty strokes; and then
pretending to be overcome with pain, he first opened one eye, and
soon after the other; calling out at the same time for mercy, and
begging the judge of the police to order them to remit his
punishment. At seeing the robber with both eyes open, the judge was
very much astonished. “Scoundrel,” he cried, “what does this
strange thing mean?”--“My lord,” replied the robber, “I will
discover a most important secret, if you will have the goodness to
pardon me; and as a pledge that you will keep your word, give me the
ring you have on your finger, and which you often use as a seal. I
am then ready to reveal the whole mystery to you.”
The judge ordered his people to stop the punishment, and promised to
pardon him. “Upon the faith of this promise,” replied the
robber, “I now declare to you, my lord, that both my companions
and myself are possessed of most excellent eye-sight. We all four
feign blindness, in order to have the power of entering houses
without molestation, and even penetrating into the apartments of the
women, whose weakness we sometimes take advantage of. I moreover
confess to you, that we have collected in common, at least ten
thousand drachms by this cunning trick. This morning I demanded of
my companions two thousand five hundred drachms, which came to my
share; but because I declared I would break off all connection with
them and retire, and from fear that I should discover their
artifice, they refused to give them me; on my continuing to insist
upon my share, they all fell upon me, and ill-treated me in a
violent manner, as I can prove by the people who have brought us
before you. I wait here for you to administer justice, my lord, and
that you will make them deliver up the two thousand five hundred
drachms, which are my due. And if you wish that my comrades should
acknowledge the truth of what I advance, order them to receive three
times as many blows as you have given me, and you will see them open
their eyes as I did.”
My brother and the other two blind men wished to convince the judge
of this infamous imposture, but he would not hear a word.
“Rascals,” cried he, “is it thus then that you counterfeit
blindness, and go about deceiving people, under pretence of exciting
their charity, and are thus enabled to be guilty of such wicked
actions?”--“He is an impostor,” exclaimed my brother, “it is
false, that we are able to see at all, and we are ready to take God
to witness of it.”
Whatever my brother could say, was nevertheless useless; both he and
his companions received two hundred strokes of the bastinado. The
judge every moment expected them to open their eyes, and attributed
to their great obstinacy, what it was impossible for them to do.
During the whole of this time, the robber kept saying to the blind
men, “My good fellows, open your eyes, and do not wait till you
almost die under the punishment.” Then addressing himself to the
judge of the police, he added, “I see very well, my lord, that
they will carry their obstinacy so far, that they will never open
their eyes; they are without doubt anxious to avoid the shame of
reading their own condemnation in the countenances of those who
surround them. It is better to pardon them now, and send some one
with me to take the ten thousand drachms they have concealed.”
The judge did not intend to neglect doing this; he therefore
commanded one of his people to accompany the robber, and they
brought the ten bags back with them. He then ordered two thousand
five hundred drachms to be counted out and given to the robber, and
kept the remainder for himself. With respect to my brother and his
companions, he was satisfied with ordering them into banishment,
which punishment he thought light enough. I was no sooner informed
of what had happened to Bakbac, than I sought him out. He related
his misfortune to me, and I brought him privately back into the
city. I should have been able, I have no doubt, to have proved the
innocence of my brother before the judge of the police, and to have
had the robber punished as he deserved, but I dared not undertake it
for fear of bringing some misfortune upon my own head.
This is the conclusion of the melancholy adventure of my third
brother, who was blind. The caliph did not laugh less at this than
he had done at those he had before heard. He again ordered me to
receive something more; but without waiting till they had done so, I
began the history of my fourth brother.
THE HISTORY
OF THE BARBER’S FOURTH BROTHER.
The name by which my fourth brother was called, was Alcouz. He lost
his eye in the manner I shall have the honour to relate to your
majesty. He was a butcher by trade! and as he had a particular
talent in bringing up rams, and teaching them to fight, he from this
circumstance acquired the friendship and knowledge of some of the
principal people; who were much amused with these sorts of combats,
and who even kept rams for this very purpose at their own houses. He
had, besides, a very good business; and there was always in his shop
the finest and most beautiful meat that was to be found in the
market; because he was very rich, and did not spare expense in order
to have the best.
As he was one day in his shop, an old man, who had a very long and
white beard, came in to purchase six pounds of meat; he then paid
his money and went away. My brother observed, that his money was
very beautiful, new, and well coined. He resolved, therefore, to lay
it by in a separate part of his closet. During five months the same
old man came regularly every day for the same quantity of meat, and
paid for it with the same sort of money, which my brother as
regularly continued to lay by.
At the end of five months, Alcouz, having an inclination to make a
purchase of a certain quantity of sheep, resolved to pay for them
out of this particular money; the therefore went to his box, and
opened it; but he was in the greatest astonishment, when he
discovered, instead of his money, only a parcel of leaves cut round.
He immediately began to beat himself, and made so great a noise,
that he brought all his neighbours about him; whose surprise was as
great as his own, when he informed them of what had passed. “I
wish to God,” cried my brother, with tears in his eyes, “that
this treacherous old man would at this instant make his appearance
with his hypocritical face.” He had hardly spoken these words,
when he saw him coming along at a distance. He ran in the greatest
hurry to meet him, and having seized hold of him; “Mussulmen,”
he vociferated with all his force, “assist me; only listen to the
shameful trick that this infamous man has played me.” He then
related to a large crowd of people, who had collected round him, the
same story he had before done to his neighbours. When he had
finished his tale, the old man, without the least emotion, quietly
answered, You would do much better to let me go, and by this action
make reparation for the affront you have thus offered me before so
many people; lest I should return you the compliment in a more
serious manner, which I should be sorry to do.”--“And what have
you, pray, to say against me?” replied my brother, “I am an
honest man in my business, and I fear you not.”--“You wish,
then, that I should make it public,” returned the old man, in the
same tone of voice. “Learn then,” added he, addressing himself
to the people, “that instead of selling the flesh of sheep, as he
ought to do, this man sells human flesh.”--“You are an
impostor,” cried my brother.”--“No, no,” answered the other;
for at this very moment I am speaking, there is a man with his
throat cut, hanging up on the outside of your shop like a sheep. Let
them go there, and we shall soon know, whether I have spoken the
truth.”
Before my brother had opened the box where the leaves were, he had
that morning killed a sheep, and had dressed and exposed it on the
outside of his shop as usual. He therefore protested that what the
old man had said was false; but in spite of all his protestations,
the credulous mob, enraged at the idea of a man’s being guilty of
so shocking a crime, wished to be assured of the fact on the spot.
They therefore obliged my brother to let the old man go, and laid
hold of him instead, and ran like fury to his shop, where they saw a
man with his throat cut; and hung up exactly as the accuser had
stated: for this old man was, in fact, a magician, and had deceived
the eyes of all the people, as he had formerly done my brother, when
he made him take the leaves he had given him, for real good money.