C H A P. IX

I SOLEMNLY declare to all mankind, that the above dedication was made

for no one Prince, Prelate, Pope, or Potentate,—Duke, Marquis, Earl,

Viscount, or Baron, of this, or any other Realm in Christendom;——nor

has it yet been hawked about, or offered publicly or privately,

directly or indirectly, to any one person or personage, great or small;

but is honestly a true Virgin-Dedication untried on, upon any soul

living.

I labour this point so particularly, merely to remove any offence or

objection which might arise against it from the manner in which I

propose to make the most of it;—which is the putting it up fairly to

public sale; which I now do.

——Every author has a way of his own in bringing his points to bear;—for

my own part, as I hate chaffering and higgling for a few guineas in a

dark entry;—I resolved within myself, from the very beginning, to deal

squarely and openly with your Great Folks in this affair, and try

whether I should not come off the better by it.

If therefore there is any one Duke, Marquis, Earl, Viscount, or Baron,

in these his Majesty’s dominions, who stands in need of a tight,

genteel dedication, and whom the above will suit, (for by the bye,

unless it suits in some degree, I will not part with it)——it is much at

his service for fifty guineas;——which I am positive is twenty guineas

less than it ought to be afforded for, by any man of genius.

My Lord, if you examine it over again, it is far from being a gross

piece of daubing, as some dedications are. The design, your Lordship

sees, is good,—the colouring transparent,—the drawing not amiss;—or to

speak more like a man of science,—and measure my piece in the painter’s

scale, divided into 20,—I believe, my Lord, the outlines will turn out

as 12,—the composition as 9,—the colouring as 6,—the expression 13 and

a half,—and the design,—if I may be allowed, my Lord, to understand my

own _design_, and supposing absolute perfection in designing, to be as

20,—I think it cannot well fall short of 19. Besides all this,—there is

keeping in it, and the dark strokes in the HOBBY-HORSE, (which is a

secondary figure, and a kind of back-ground to the whole) give great

force to the principal lights in your own figure, and make it come off

wonderfully;—and besides, there is an air of originality in the _tout

ensemble._

Be pleased, my good Lord, to order the sum to be paid into the hands of

Mr. _Dodsley_, for the benefit of the author; and in the next edition

care shall be taken that this chapter be expunged, and your Lordship’s

titles, distinctions, arms, and good actions, be placed at the front of

the preceding chapter: All which, from the words, _De gustibus non est

disputandum_, and whatever else in this book relates to HOBBY-HORSES,

but no more, shall stand dedicated to your Lordship.—The rest I

dedicate to the Moon, who, by the bye, of all the PATRONS or MATRONS I

can think of, has most power to set my book a-going, and make the world

run mad after it.

_Bright Goddess_,

If thou art not too busy with CANDID and Miss CUNEGUND’S affairs,—take

_Tristram Shandy’s_ under thy protection also.

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