29. It is a breach of etiquette, in general conversation, to refer
to incidents known to only one of the company, thus forcing a
species of _tete-a-tete_, and withdrawing a perhaps unwilling
partner from the general society.
30. Cards of ceremony must be answered either by a call, a letter,
or a return card, within a week after their reception.
32. New-Year's calls must be made in person. It is a breach of
etiquette to send a card, unless prevented by illness from
calling.
32. Never rise to take leave in the midst of an interesting
conversation; wait until there is a pause, and then withdraw, with
as little disturbance as possible.
33. If you are calling, and another person enters, never offer the
chair assigned you by the lady of the house; it is her privilege
to decide where to place her guests, and an impertinence on your
part to usurp her place.
34. A gentleman will never talk of his business affairs to a lady,
nor a lady weary her gentlemen friends by an account of her
domestic affairs.
35. The only gifts that may be offered or accepted between ladies
and gentlemen who are not related or engaged are books, flowers,
music, or confectionary. A lady who accepts costly presents of
jewelry puts herself under an obligation that she may find
troublesome, and no true gentleman will expose a lady to the pain
of refusing an improper gift of this kind.
36. In entering a room filled with people, it is etiquette to bow
slightly, as a general salutation, before speaking to each of
those assembled.
37. It is etiquette, before taking a place at table, to say "Good-
morning," or "Good-evening," to those in the room before you, and
especially to those who preside over the meal.
38. It is a breach of etiquette to go into company with the breath
tainted by eating onions, garlic, cheese, or any other strong-
scented food.
39. It is a breach of etiquette for a gentleman to enter a lady's
presence smelling of tobacco or wine.
40. It is a breach of etiquette to send a present hoping for
another.
41. It is a breach of etiquette ever to refer to a gift you have
made, a favor you have granted, or an obligation of any kind under
which another lies with regard to you.
42. It is a breach of etiquette, and shows a sad want of true
delicacy, to return a gift very soon. An obligation of that kind,
if accepted at all, must not be thrust back at once in the donor's
face.
43. It is a breach of etiquette for a husband or wife to speak of
each other by their initial letter. When you hear a lady saying,
"B., gave me this," or a gentleman saying, "I always refer such
matters to Mrs. P.," you may rest assured, whatever their social
station, they are low-bred.
44. "Civility," says Lord Chesterfield, "is particularly due to
all women; and remember that no provocation whatsoever can justify
any man in not being civil to every woman; and the greatest man
would justly be reckoned a brute if he were not civil to the
meanest woman. It is due to their sex, and is the only protection
they have against the superior strength of ours."
45. Too great familiarity towards a new acquaintance is a breach
of etiquette. You are less likely to offend by being too
ceremonious.
46. To notice, by look or word, any deformity, any scar of
misfortune to the face or figure of a friend, in not only a breach
of etiquette of the grossest kind, but is a want of humanity and
good feeling as well.
47. It is a breach of etiquette, when offering a gift, to
represent it as valueless, or useless to yourself. "If you do not
have it, the pigs will," is a homely old proverb in such cases,
not acceptable in polite society.
48. It is a breach of etiquette to laugh at your own wit. If
others will not do that for you, you had better let your remark
pass unnoticed.
49. It is a breach of etiquette to lean heavily upon a table; and
also to tip a chair to and fro when you are talking; and you will
be justly punished if you find yourself sprawling on the floor
with the chair on top of you.
50. It is a breach of etiquette to write your own remarks in a
borrowed book.