WHEN ladies have, according to the French custom, set apart one
morning or one evening in the week for receiving callers, it is a
breach of etiquette to call at any other time, unless a short
visit in the city or business that will not admit of delay are the
excuses. An hour in the evening, and from ten to twenty minutes in
the morning are the limits for a formal call.
When there is no time thus set apart, formal calls must be paid in
the morning, but with friends of long standing the evening call is
not only permissible, but often far more welcome.
Morning calls may be made by gentlemen in society upon all the
occasions following:
In answer to a letter of introduction sent to him, or to return
the call if the letter is personally presented.
In return for any hospitality offered to him when visiting another
city, if the entertainer visit his own place of abode.
In return for any favor received or courtesy extended to him by
another gentleman.
In return for an invitation to the house of a friend, whether the
invitation has been accepted or declined, and this call must be
made within the week following that during which the entertainment
was given.
On any occasion when a grief or a joy calls for expressions of
condolence or congratulation in the circle of his friends.
To greet the safe return of any friend who has been abroad, or
away from home for any length of time.
Following any occasion when a lady has accepted his services as an
escort, a gentleman must call to inquire after the health of his
fair charge, and must not delay longer than the day after that
upon which he has escorted the lady.
After a wedding, at the time appointed for the reception of
friends.
When visiting in another city, upon any friends there, or upon
those to whom letters of introduction have been given.
In asking or granting a favor, a call is demanded by etiquette.
The visit or call is a much better institution than the vulgar
suppose. It is not without its objections, consuming valuable
time, and giving occasion for gossip and small talk, but it is the
most agreeable and customary way of turning a mere acquaintance
into a friend. In a friendly call much of the restraint of meeting
in large assemblies is thrown aside, mind meets mind much more
easily in an easy _tete-a-tete_ conversation, and the conversation
may be allowed to partake somewhat more of a personal character
than it could in the ball-room or evening party.
First calls require prompt return, even if you drop the
acquaintance before the second one.
Morning calls must never be earlier than noon, evening ones never
later than nine o'clock.
When calling, if the room seems crowded, do not prolong your
visit.
A gentleman may never call with a friend upon a lady, unless the
friend is previously acquainted, or he has obtained permission of
the lady to introduce him.
In making a formal call, a gentleman must retain his hat in his
hand. An umbrella or cane may be left in the hall, never the hat
or gloves. If the call is made in the evening, the hat and gloves
must be held until the host or hostess gives an invitation to lay
them aside and spend the evening. Strict etiquette requires that
such an invitation shall not be given, or if given, not accepted
on the occasion of a first call.
In making an informal call in the evening, a gentleman may leave
hat, gloves, cane and overcoat in the hall.
No gentleman will prolong a call if he finds his host or hostess
dressed to go out. A brief visit with a promise to repeat it will
place his entertainers at ease, and even if they urge a longer
stay, the very fact that they were preparing to go out, proves
their desire to do so.
A card used in calling must never have anything upon it, but the
name and address of the caller. Nothing can show a greater
ignorance of the customs of society than to use a business card
for a friendly call. A physician may put the prefix Dr. or the
professional M.D., upon his card, and an Army or Navy officer his
rank and branch of service. Thus a civilian's card must be simply:
JAMES LAWTON,
417 L--- Street.
A physician's:
DR. JEROME HAYES,
218 T--- Street, or