CHAPTER IX

THE LOAFER’S PARADISE

He who travels à force de bras may regulate his sight-seeing as exactly

as the moneyed tourist by clinging to one fixed plan—to fall penniless

and be forced to seek employment only in those cities with which he

would become well acquainted. In all north Africa no spot offered more

attractions for an extended stay than Cairo. Once arrived there,

whatever the fates had in store for me, I should be on chosen ground. At

all hazards I must reach Cairo before I “went broke.”

On my second morning in Alexandria, I repaired to the railway station,

only to find that I had delayed my departure a bit too long. The

third-class fare to the capital was low, but, unfortunately, just three

piastres more than I possessed. Should I take train as far as possible

and finish the journey on foot and penniless, or should I save the money

on hand for food en route and tramp the entire distance?

Pondering the question, I dropped into a bench on the Place Mohammed

Ali, and fell to whittling a stick. A countryman, strolling by, paused

to stare, and sitting down on the far end of the bench, watched me

intently. Now a Frank is no more of a novelty in Alexandria than in

Kansas City, even though in ragged garb; for, given a great port

anywhere on the earth’s surface, you will find Jack Tar, at least,

rambling penniless and forlorn through her streets. Either the native

was astonished to see a man work, even with his hands, when he was not

paid to do so, or the knife had attracted his attention. Inch by inch,

he slid along the bench.

“Very good knife, kwice cateer,” he murmured.

Two months in the Arab world had given me vocabulary enough for simple

conversations. “Aywa,” I answered, tossing away the stick and closing

the knife.

The fellah gave a gasp of delight.

“But it shuts up, like a door,” he cried.

I opened and closed it several times for his edification; then slid down

in my seat, my thoughts elsewhere.

“You sell it?” grinned the Arab.

“Eh!” I gasped, straightening up in astonishment, “you—”

“I’ll give you five piastres,” wheedled the peasant, “gkamsa tarifa.”

“Take it!” I cried, and, grasping the coin he held out to me, I dashed

away to the station.

A half-hour later I was speeding southward across the fertile delta of

the Nile. What a contrast was this land to that I had so lately left

behind! Every few miles the train halted at a bustling city; between

them mound-like fellaheen villages and well-cultivated fields raced

northward. Inside the car—of American pattern—prosperous, well-groomed

natives perused the latest newspapers and smoked world-famous cigarettes

with the blasé air of Parisian commuters. Even the half-blind victims of

ophthalmia leaned back in their seats in the perfect contentment of

well-fed creatures. An eyeless pre-adamite in one corner roared with

laughter at the sallies of his companions. Far more at ease was he, for

all his affliction, than I, with neither friend nor acquaintance in the

length and breadth of the continent.

The Oriental panorama grew dim. One could with difficulty distinguish in

this ultra-flat country, where every object stood out sharply against

the horizon, between a distant village and a reclining water-buffalo,

nearer at hand. The western sky turned ruddy a moment, dulled to a

brown, and the darkness that falls so quickly in tropical countries left

me to stare at my own face beyond the window. An impressive reflection

indeed! A figure to inspire prospective employers with confidence! The

lights that were springing up across the plain were of no village where

inhabitants welcomed strangers with open arms. Every click of the wheels

brought me nearer the metropolis of Africa, a great city, of which I

knew little more than the name, and where I should soon be set adrift in

the darkness with the ludicrous sum of ten cents in my pocket! Perhaps

in all Cairo there was not another penniless adventurer of my race? Even

if there were, and a “vagabond’s retreat” somewhere among these long

rows of streets that flashed by as those of London in approaching St.

Pancras, small chance had I of finding it. For, were my Arabic as fluent

as my English, no policeman could direct me to so unconventional a

quarter.

The train halted in a vast, domed station. A mighty press of humanity

swept me through the waiting-rooms and out upon a brightly-lighted

square. There the screaming throng of hackmen, porters, donkey boys, and

hotel runners drove me to take refuge behind a station pillar. I swung

my knapsack over my shoulder and gazed, utterly undecided, across the

human sea.

Suddenly a voice sounded above the roar:—“Heh! Landsmann, wohin?” I

stared eagerly about me, for this simple greeting, properly accented, is

the password of the German tramp wherever he wanders. Under a

neighboring arc-light stood a young man of ruddy, sunburned countenance,

in a stout, if somewhat ragged, suit and a cloth cap. At my sign of

recognition, he dived into the crowd and fought his way to my side.

“Ah!” he shouted, in German, “I knew only one of the boys would blow in

with a knapsack and a corduroy suit! Where are you turning up from? Just

got in from Zagazig myself. Been down there grubbing up some cash. How

long have you been away? Business any good down at the coast? Don’t

believe it is. Cairo’s the place for easy winnings. Bet you blew in

without a piastre? Give ’em the stony face on the train? I did, though a

fellow down in Zagazig ticketed me. Gave me the cash, the wise one, and

of course I planted it and stared them off.”

Had I not already served an apprenticeship in German slang, I should

have come off with a very indistinct notion of the recent activities of

my new acquaintance. I broke in as soon as possible to assure him that I

had never dared to hope that civilization was so up-to-date in Egypt

that one could “beat his way” on the railroads, and to protest that I

could doubly deny his charge of having “eingeblasen” without a piastre.

“It’s my first trip to Cairo,” I concluded. “I bought my own ticket—”

“What!” roared the German, “Ticketed yourself! Lieber Gott, aber du bist

roh! Tick—But then,” he continued, in a hushed voice, “now I think of

it, so did I! Schafskopf, ja! I paid good money to come to Cairo the

first time! Höllespein, what a greenhorn I was!”

As he talked, we had left behind the howling throng. No need to ask

where he was leading me.

“There’s an Asile in Cairo,” he put in, “but you’re too late to-night.

You’ll meet all die Kamaraden where we’re going, for they’re most of

them ausgespielt with the churchman and can’t talk the Asile tickets out

of him.”

We crossed a rectangular square where street cars clanged their way

through a multitude, and turned down a street flanked by

brightly-lighted shops.

[Illustration: A winged dahabiyeh of the Nile]

[Illustration: Sais or carriage runners of Cairo, clearing the streets

for their master]

“It’s the Moosky,” said the German. “Good old lane. Many a piastre I’ve

picked up in her.”

He dodged into a side alley, jogged over a street, and entered the

headquarters of “die Kameraden.” It was a wine shop with connecting

kitchen, on the lower floor of a four-story building; just such a

rendezvous as one finds in Germany. A shuffling Jew was drawing beer and

wine for several groups of noisy faranchees at the tables, to the

accompaniment of a continual jabber in Yiddish to which the tipplers

replied, now and then, in German. A long-unwashed female wandered in

from the back room with a steaming plate of meat and potatoes.

“Der Jude has lodgings,” said my companion, pointing at the ceiling.

“Three small piastres. You can still eat a small piastre worth.”

Great impression two and a half cents would have made on an all-day

appetite! Almost before I realized it, I had called for a supper that

took my last copper.

By the time I finished eating, the “comrades” were demanding the

biography of “der Ankömmling.” As all the party spoke German, I gave an

abbreviated account of myself in that language.

“And what countryman are you?” asked a youth at a neighboring table.

“Ich bin Amerikaner.”

The entire party, the Jew included, burst into uproarious laughter so

suddenly that two black urchins, peering in upon us, took to their

heels.

“Amerikaner! Ja! Ja!” shrieked the merrymakers, “Freilich! We are all

Americans. But what are you when you tell the truth to your good

comrades? Amerikaner! Ha! Ha!—”

The cane of the first speaker beat a tattoo on the table and the mirth

subsided. Plainly, he was a man of authority in the gathering.

“Now, then,” he cried, as though I were entitled by the rules of “the

union” to enter two answers, “what country _are_ you from?”

I repeated my first assertion.

“So you are an American, rheally?” he demanded, suddenly, in clear

English, though with a marked accent.

A long reply in my own tongue upset his conviction that I should not be

able to understand him. The others, however, grinned skeptically and

fell to chattering again, glancing up from time to time to mutter,

“Amerikaner! Ja, gewiss.” I scraped up a half-pipe of tobacco from the

corners of a pocket, and fell asleep over the fumes.

A whining voice sounded in my ear:—“H’raus, Hop! Will mich

einschliessen!” I opened my eyes to find the Jew bending over me. The

room was nearly empty. Of the few “comrades” who remained one was the

youth who had addressed me in English. I caught up my bundle and turned

towards the door.

“Du bist, aber, ganz kaput?” demanded the young man, “have you no

money?”

“No.”

He rose and followed after me.

“If you are ein richtiger Amerikaner,” he said, “I can show you where to

pick up the price of a lodging.”

I nodded. The youth called to the Hebrew to leave his door unlocked, and

led the way down the Moosky, across the square, and along a street that

flanked a wooded park.

“Esbekieh Gardens, those,” he said. “I’m taking you to the American

Mission Hospital. There are eight American preachers there, but your

best chance now is Reverend ——. He lives in the third story, first door

to the right of the stairway. You will find him studying. He studies

until two in the morning. Knock on the door once. He won’t answer; but

push it open and begin a hard-luck story right away. Now don’t tell him

that you’ve just come to Egypt, nor that you’re a sailor; and, if he

asks you if you speak German, say no. Tell him you are a civil engineer,

or a plate-layer, or a mason, and that you’ve just walked down from

Central Africa—your clothes fit that—and that you could get no work

there, or—or that you got sick; yes, that’s better, for he’s an old wise

one and knows there’s plenty of work up the river. Tell him you speak

only English and that you are an American—that is if you _are_—and he

will give you ten piastres. If you’re not sure you can talk English

without a foreign accent—I can’t tell whether you do or not—well, I

wouldn’t disturb the old man. He doesn’t like Germans.”

The youth pointed out a door of the Mission and slipped into the blacker

night of one of her pillars. I stepped inside, and, mounting to the

first landing, sat down to think matters over. The night air of January

was too cold to sleep out of doors even should I succeed in hiding where

the patrol could not rout me out. But to come at midnight to disturb an

aged missionary with a stereotyped tale of woe! Yet I knew the bitter

hopelessness of looking for work after a night in the streets, and “a

deep breath for breakfast.” Work? Why, of course! Just the point! I must

find work before I left Cairo; why could I not ask for a small loan and

pay it back?

I continued up the stairs and knocked on the door that had been

indicated. There was no response, but a tiny thread of light showed on

the threshold. I stepped inside. In the far corner of a small room, a

white-haired man closed, over a finger, the book he was reading, and

turned the light of a student lamp full upon me. I began my story—not

the one the German had plotted—and stated my case briefly. To my dismay,

the word “borrow” fell flat.

“I rarely,” said the old man, in a voice that would have chorded well

with the last key of a piano, “I rarely give money to a man who has just

come to the country. What business has he here without sufficient funds

to establish himself? I have never given money to sailors. I know their

ways too well. But after long months of daily visits from ‘Americans’

who speak English as if they had learned it in the slums of Berlin, I am

glad to see a real American again; though sorry to find that he is

without money, and still more so that he is a sailor. Here is a

half-dollar”—handing me a ten-piastre piece—“I hope you will not drink

quite all of it up. What state are you from?”

“Michigan. You understand I am only borrowing this until I can find

work—”

“Young man,” said the missionary, rising to his feet, “you already have

the money—the amount I give, if I give at all. No additions to your tale

will cause me to offer more. Why, then, attempt to raise false hopes

within my breast? So you are from Michigan? I am from Pittsburg. Good

night,” and without giving me time for reply, he sat down and lost

himself in the pages of his book.

“You were gone a long time,” said the German, as I emerged from the

doorway. “You couldn’t show _him_ you were an American?”

I held out the coin in my hand.

“Ei! Gott!” cried my companion, “you got it? You are an American, then,

a genuine American! It’s the test I always apply. He can tell an

American at his first three words.”

“But why didn’t the crowd believe me?” I demanded.

“Ach!” burst out the youth, “Here in Cairo all the boys are Americans.

We have Germans, Austrians, Hungarians, Poles, Norwegians, all sorts in

the union, and everyone is an ‘American’—except among the comrades. And

not three of them ever saw the United States! It is because, of all the

foreigners in Egypt, the Americans are the easiest and the most

generous. Then you know what a bad reputation Germans have as

beggars—all turning out on their Wanderjahre? The Germans here will help

us. Yes! But how? By giving us a loaf of bread, or an old pair of shoes,

or two piastres. Bah! But the Americans! They give pounds and whole

suits, and they don’t ask to hear the whole story of your past life.

Americans? Why, there are dozens of American missionaries, judges,

merchants, engineers, and ei! Gott! the tourists! There’s your rich

harvest, mein Freund! Why, a year I’ve been in Cairo learning English

and picking the roosters. I’ve been up to see that greybeard four times!

I dressed differently every time and practised every story for weeks

until I got the accent right. Three times I got ten piastres, but the

fourth he asked me questions, and, as I hadn’t practised the answers, I

talked wild English and tangled myself up. Then I tried to get out of it

by saying I was a Pennsylvania Dutchman. The old man started in on

geography, and when I told him Pennsylvania was on the Gulf of Mexico he

took his cane and chased me out. I’ve studied maps of the United States

since then, though. He couldn’t catch me again. I know every city.”

“Yes,” he went on, as we turned into the now deserted Moosky, “all die

Kunde try to be Americans. Aber Gott! The fools! They are too pig-headed

ever to learn to talk English with an American accent. But you! Du

glücklicher Kerl! You can live in Cairo until you grow a beard!”

I paid my lodging and followed the German up a narrow, winding stairway

at the back of the shop. On the third story he pushed open a door much

like the drop of a home-made rabbit trap, which gave admittance to a

small room where four of six beds were already occupied. It needed only

one long-drawn breath to prove that the “bedclothes” had not seen the

washtub during several generations of “the boys,” and that a can of

insect powder could be used to great advantage. But he who is both

penniless and hypercritical should remain at home. I took the bed beside

that of the German and was soon asleep.

I awoke next morning to find my guide of the night before sitting on his

bed at a dry-goods box before the single window, sipping black coffee

from a tin can and eating a boiled egg and a slab of bread with one

hand, and slowly penning a letter with the other. Having seen enough of

him already to be convinced that he was a man of considerable education,

I was surprised to find that he wielded a pen with such apparent

difficulty.

“It’s this English script that troubles me,” he remarked, as if in

answer to my unexpressed question. “When you have written all your life

in German script, it is hard to change.”

“Then you’re writing English?” I cried.

He motioned to the letter before him as he swallowed the last of the

coffee:—“Of course! A man can’t eat if he doesn’t work. There’s a New

York millionaire just come to town. His name is Leigh Hunt, and I’m

writing to ask him for employment. He won’t have any, of course, but he

may send me a pound or two. I found it too hard to learn to speak

English without a foreign accent, so I write instead.”

He reached inside the box that served as table and tossed a dozen

unstamped letters on my bed. All were addressed to Englishmen or

Americans, among them people of international reputation.

“Read them according to the dates,” said the youth, “and see if my

English hasn’t improved. I copied them all and sent out the copies. All

but two sent me money. One wrote me to come and see him to-day. The

other I haven’t heard from. You don’t spell ‘poverty’ with a capital, do

you?”

As he had spoken but one sentence in English since our meeting, I was

surprised to note the fluent use of that language in his letters. None

of them contained actual errors; and only a peculiar turning of a

phrase, here and there, which a reader off his guard might easily have

overlooked, betrayed the nationality of the writer. The stories they

told were proof of an inventive imagination. A dozen “hard-luck tales,”

no one of which resembled the others, were all signed by different

Americanized names, over different addresses. Here a youth from

Baltimore, who had come to Egypt to open a store, had been robbed of all

he possessed. There a civil engineer from New York had been forced to

leave his work on the Berber-Suakim line and hasten down to Cairo to

attend a sick wife and four small children. An aged stone mason, who had

been injured while working on the barrage at Assuan, prayed for

assistance to get back to his home in Cincinnati. A California

prospector, just returned from an unsuccessful expedition into the

Uganda protectorate, was lying ill and penniless in a miserable

lodging-house.

Nor did the resourceful German confine himself to his own sex. The last

letter was an appeal to a well-known American lady from a young girl who

had come from Boston to act as stenographer to a tourist firm that had

not materialized, and who sought assistance before starvation should

drive her to ruin.

“How about this Boston story?” I asked.

“Best of the lot,” replied the youth. “Sent me two pounds and a letter

full of wise advice—for females.”

“But didn’t she ask to see you?”

“Bah! Most of them are too busy enjoying themselves. They prefer to send

a bank note and forget the matter. Once in a while, one of them sends

for me and, if I think he is not too clever—most millionaires aren’t,

you know—I go to see him, and generally get something on the

Pennsylvania Dutch story.”

“Where do you get the names?”

“Mostly from this,” said the youth, reaching into the box once more and

pulling out a Paris edition of the New York Herald. “If a millionaire

starts for Egypt, or lands here, or catches cold, or bruises his toe,

the Herald knows it—and never forgets the address. Then there is a

society paper published here in Cairo—”

“Do you write German letters, too?”

“Not many. I used to, when I first came to Africa, but it’s a poor game.

I began to study English when I came to Cairo, a year ago. My first

letters must have been bad, for I got no answers. But they make me a

living now, and an occasional spree.”

“How much time does your letter writing take?”

“Four hours. I used to write at all times. Then I read of an author who

wrote, rain or shine, from nine till one, and I find it a good idea. But

to-day I’m going to break the rule and show you where you can talk the

pounds out of some rich Americans. Why,” he cried, enthusiastically,

“there hasn’t been a real American working the crowd since I’ve been

here. We’ll go into partnership. I know all the ropes and you can do the

writing and interviewing; and, when we get Cairo pumped out, we’ll go up

the Nile! I know every white man from here to Cape Town. I’ve covered

Africa from one end to the other—with an American partner, too. But he

was a real Pennsylvania Dutchman and had a little accent. You’ll do much

better. Africa’s all good; though Cairo’s the best, for there’s no

vagrancy law here. We’ll make an easy living together or my name isn’t

Otto Pia.”

“Ever think of going to America?”

[Illustration: An Arab gardener on the estate of the American consul of

Cairo, for whom I worked two weeks]

[Illustration: Otto Pia, the German beggar-letter writer of Cairo]

“Never,” he cried, “unless I was drunk. Never again a white man’s

country for me! Here, a white wanderer is an isolated case of

misfortune, far from his native shore. At home, he is only a common

tramp, one among thousands, and the man who would give him pounds here

would give him to the police there. That’s why few of die Kunde who come

here—if they have brains enough to weave Märchen—ever go back. Do you

know the secret of getting the sympathy of the rich? It’s to make them

think we’re much worse off here than at home and to keep before them the

idea that we cannot find work. For that reason I am a plate-layer in

Cairo; for plate-layers are only needed far up the Nile. If I’m up the

Nile, I’m a stenographer, or a waiter, or anything else that there is

sure to be no work for. No, mein Freund, never your United States for

me! And you’ll not go back either, when I’ve showed you how easy it is

to pick the roosters here. A tramp, you know, is like a prophet—’er gilt

nichts in seinem Vaterlande.’”

“While you’re dressing and thinking up a few good Märchen,” he went on,

turning to his writing, “I’ll copy this letter. Then I’ll show you a few

of the easiest marks.”

I protested, however, that I had come to Cairo to work rather than to

weave “fairy tales.”

“Work?” he shouted, throwing aside his pen and springing to his feet, “A

fellow who can write and talk English—and German, too, wants to _work_

in Cairo? Why, mein lieber Kerl, you—you—” but the words stuck in his

astonished throat.

I descended to the street and set out to visit such European contractors

as I could locate. Long after dark, foot-sore and half-famished, covered

with the dust of Cairo, I returned to the rendezvous and sat down at one

of the tables. It was quite evident that die Kunde were neither

foot-sore nor hungry, and their garments were as immaculate as

second-hand garments can be made. The “wise ones” had loafed in the

cafés and gardens, had written a letter or told a hard-luck story

somewhere, and turned up at night with money enough to make merry

through the whole evening. I, having tramped all day, from one address

to another, turned up with—an appetite.

Otto Pia watched me, with a half-smile on his countenance, for some time

after I had entered. Then he raised his cane and rapped on the table for

silence.

“Ei! Gute Kamaraden!” he cried, “I have something to show you! Guk’ mal!

Here is a comrade who is an American—do you hear—a real American, not a

patched-up one; and this real American—in Cairo—wants to _work_!”

“_Work?_” roared the chorus, “_Work_ in Cairo—and a real American—Lieber

Gott—Ist’s denn ein Esel?—”

I ate a meager supper and crawled away to bed. On the following day, I

tramped even greater distances, and returned to the wine shop with only

the price of a lodging left from the missionary’s donation. Pia rose and

took a seat beside me.

“Lot of work you found, eh?” he began. “Didn’t any of them offer you

money?”

“Most of them,” I answered.

“And you didn’t take it?” cried the German, “Why, you—you—you’re a

disgrace to the union.

“I know how you feel though,” he went on, “I was the same once. When I

ran away from Germany—to escape the army—I wouldn’t take a cent I hadn’t

earned; and I starved a month in Pietermaritzburg, looking for work as

you are here, before I got over my silly notions. Ach! I was an ass! I

tell you it’s no use. You won’t find work—especially in those rags. If

you _will_ work, let me take you where you can get some clothes first.”

It was all too evident that he was right. Weather-beaten garments might

pass muster in the wilderness of Palestine, but they were wholly out of

place in the Paris of Africa. Twice that day, those who had refused me

employment had offered to fit me out in their cast-off clothing. I

concluded to profit by the experience of Pia.

The German abandoned the composition of pathetic short stories for an

hour next morning to conduct me to the Secretary of the “Cairo Aid

Society,” a minister of the Church of England. Having pointed out the

rectory, he left me without a sign of recognition, and marched

unfalteringly down the street until he vanished behind the next row of

houses. I mounted the broad steps and pressed the electric button. A

jet-black Arab opened the door.

“I want to see the Reverend ——,” I began.

“Very sorry, but Reverend —— not in,” replied the servant, with a flash

of ivory teeth in a very friendly smile.

“When will he be in?”

“Ah! Reverend —— gone to Iskanderia. No can tell. Come back maybe three

day, maybe week,” and the black face grew so sorrowful with pity that I

hastened to leave, lest tears should begin to flow.

The German was awaiting me about four steps from the spot where he had

disappeared at a brisk walk.

“You’re back soon,” he said, “what luck?”

“He is not in.”

“Not in? Höllespein! Certainly he’s in! He never goes out before noon.

Do you think I’m a bungler at my profession? I know the hours of every

padre in Cairo, exactly, always! Who told you he was not in?”

“His servant.”

“Was! Ein verdammter Schwartze? Herr Gott, aber du bist roh! Two days

looking for work, and you don’t know yet that every nigger servant will

tell you his master is out? Not in!”—and he burst forth in his

peculiarly silent, yet uproarious laughter.

A new light had broken in upon me. This, then, was the reason that of

some forty white men whom I had called on for employment, a bare dozen

had been at home? I left my companion to conquer his risibility alone,

and, hastening back to the rectory, brought the servant to the door with

a vicious ring.

“I’ve heard the Reverend —— _is_ in. I want to see him.”

There was no smile on the ebony face now. Even through the mask of black

skin one could see anger welling up, the blind rage of the Mussulman

against the hated unbeliever.

“I say Reverend —— not in!” snarled the servant, in hoarse sotto voce,

“Go away.”

With a string of English oaths that spoke better of his linguistic

abilities than the influence of his master, he shut the door, quickly,

yet noiselessly.

I pressed a finger against the electric button and kept it there. A

quick muffled patter of footsteps sounded inside, a whispered

imprecation came through the keyhole. My finger was growing numb. I

relieved it with a thumb without breaking the circuit.

“Go away,” growled the servant, fiercely, half opening the door, “go

way, damn you, I cut your neck”—and his speech did not end there. I

relieved my thumb with another finger. The murderous gleam in the Arab’s

eyes blazed forth more fiercely, then by a stern command of the will

changed to an appeal.

“My God, stop!” he begged.

“Is your master in Iskanderia?”

A cry of rage trembled on his lips and was forced back.

“No,” he snapped, throwing open the door.

I stepped inside and followed him along the hall. At the entrance to a

well-stocked library he turned to me with a hoarse whisper:—“Damn you!

Why for you ring bell? I make you full of holes—”

A light step sounded in the passage and a grey-haired English lady

stepped towards us.

“Yes, sir,” continued the Arab, without a pause, “master see you right

away, sir. Step inside, please, sir.”

“Maghmoód,” said the lady, “who was ringing the door bell so long?”

“Think button get stuck, lady, when gentleman push,” replied the Arab,

beaming upon me, “Shall I bring chocolate, lady?”

I sat down in the library and was joined almost at once by a sturdy,

well-groomed old gentleman—a Briton by every token.

“Have trouble in getting in?” he demanded abruptly, before I had spoken.

“Why—er—the servant thought at first you were not in,” I admitted.

“That rascal!” cried the minister, “I have dismissed ten servants since

I became secretary of the Society, for no other fault. Maghmoód knows

that it is my duty to keep open house during the morning; yet for some

reason I cannot fathom, an Arab domestic cannot bear the thought of

seeing his master give assistance of any kind to Europeans in

unfortunate circumstances. It is a servant problem that has often been

discussed among English residents; yet even the plumber and the

carpenter continue to be shut out from houses where they have been sent

for, unless they are well acquainted with native tricks.

“Now as to your case”—he needed no enlightenment as to my errand,

evidently—“you need clothes, of course. Ordinarily, I have several suits

on hand, sent by Englishmen in the city; but there has been such a run

of German tramps that I have nothing left. I shall have something before

long, surely. Meanwhile, I will give you a four-day ticket to the Asile

Rudolph, our Society building. What is your trade?”

“I have worked as carpenter, mason, blacksmith, stevedore—”

“Good! Good!” said the rector. “You should find work easily. If you

don’t, come back when your ticket runs out. I shall call Maghmoód up on

the carpet. Good-day, my man.”

I hastened to join the German.

“That’s good as a beginning,” he said, as I displayed the ticket, “It

shows you are on the trail, and you can work him for tickets for two or

three weeks. But I must get back to my desk. Follow this avenue to the

parade grounds; where you saw the Khedive’s guard drilling, you know.

The Asile is close by.”

[Illustration: An Arab café in Old Cairo]

In a side street in which sprawled and squalled native infants

uncountable, I tugged at a bell rope protruding from a stern brick wall,

and was admitted by a bare-legged Arab to the courtyard of the Asile

Rudolph. The superintendent, seated before the “office,” called for my

ticket. He was a sprightly Englishman, in the autumn of life, long a

captain in the Black Sea service, and still known to all as “Cap

Stevenson.” Around two sides of the court were the kitchen and

sleeping-rooms of the male inmates. Opposite the entrance towered the

Women’s Asile, a blank wall except for one window opening, through which

the English matron thrust her head at frequent intervals to berate the

captain, in a caustic falsetto, for the hilarity of his charges.

Among my new companions, some two score of ragged, care-free fellows who

had already gathered around the tables in the open air dining-room, the

German vagabond predominated. The French, Italian, and Greek tongues

were frequently heard, there were two or three castaways from the

British Isles; but as long as I remained at the Asile I was the sole

representative of the western hemisphere.

An Arab servant bawled out from the depths of the kitchen, and, as we

filed by the door, handed each of us a bowl of steaming soup and an

ample slab of bread. There was no French parsimoniousness about the

Asile Rudolph. Each bowl held a liberal quart—of something more than

discolored dishwater, too—and down at the bottom were three cubes of

meat. Never did a bowl appear during all the days that I wondered at the

audacity of the society’s butcher without exactly three such cubes, of

exactly the same size. To my companions they were the daintiest of

morsels. The best-dressed vagabond never dreamed of tasting his soup

until he had fished out this basic flesh and laid it on the table before

him to gloat over until he had finished his liquid refreshment. Once

gorged with soup, he sliced the cubes carefully, dipped the strips in

rock salt, and slowly munched them, one by one, in his eyes the far-away

look of keen enjoyment. As for myself, when I attempted to cut up my

first cube, it bounded away over my head and before I could turn around

to follow its flight had disappeared into the pocket of some

quicker-witted guest. I dismembered the second morsel with the

assistance of a fellow-boarder, and inflicted upon my teeth a piece of

convenient size. An hour later, I deposited the still undamaged delicacy

outside a factory gate at the further end of the city. When I turned out

to renew my search it was gone.

Thoughtful guests of the Society made provision during the noon-hour of

plenty for the twenty-four hours to come; for morning and evening

brought only coffee or tea, and bread. There was, however, something

more than bed and board in store for the lucky possessor of one of the

Reverend ——’s tickets—a shower bath! It was closed during the day, but I

was by no means the last to finish the evening meal, and, once inside

the wooden closet, it was only the protest that the stream could be used

to even better advantage among my companions that saved me from a watery

grave.

I began my fourth day’s search by applying at the office of the chief

owners of modern Egypt—Thomas Cook and Son. There is hardly a walk in

life, from the architect to the donkey-boy, that is not represented

among the employees of that great tourist agency. Somewhere in those

cosmopolitan ranks, I might find my place. I proffered my services to

the company as a sailor on their Nile steamers, as an unskilled workman

in any of their enterprises, as a man with a trade in the Bulak factory

where their floating palaces are constructed. Nothing came of it. In

desperation, I struck out in a struggle directly against the economic

law of labor, and, instead of dropping lower with each refusal, sought

to climb higher.

It was true, admitted the manager, that the company was in need of

clerks. It was still more in need of interpreters, and, to all

appearance, I was qualified for either position. “But—but—I’m sorry, old

chap,” and he looked sternly at my heelless slippers and ragged

corduroys, “but really, you won’t do, don’t you know. I can give you a

note to a well-known contractor—”

I accepted it with pleasure; for the name of Cook and Son, embossed at

the top of a letter of introduction, has great weight in Egypt. The

contractor to whom the note was addressed gave me—another. The addressee

of the second gave me a third. Two, three, four days, I spent in

delivering notes to the European residents of Cairo and waging battle

against her Islamite servant body. Night after night I returned to the

Asile with one stereotyped answer in my head:—

“I really haven’t anything I can put you at now. I’ll give you a letter

to ——. Are you on the rocks? Well, here, perhaps this dollar will help

you out. You don’t want it? Well, I’ll keep you in mind.”

The employers were divided into two classes: those who offered money as

the easiest means of getting rid of an unwelcome visitor, and those who

had been “on the rocks” themselves and protested against my refusal to

accept alms in the words of the water-works superintendent:—“Take it,

man, there is no harder work than looking for work; why not be paid for

it?” The strangest fact of all, one that impresses itself on the

out-of-work the world over, was the conviction of each that I should

easily find employment. “Why, to be sure,” exclaimed a superintendent of

shops in Bulak, “_we_ haven’t anything to offer just now; but a man with

your list of trades will certainly find work in Cairo in a few hours,

without the slightest trouble.” It would have been hard to convince him

that I had heard that same statement in a half-dozen languages a score

of times a day for a week past. Gradually the assertion of “the

comrades,” that he who would work in the Egyptian capital was an ass,

took on new force.

Rich or penniless, however, he who does not enjoy the winter season in

Cairo must be either an invalid, a prisoner, or an incurable pessimist.

Here one does not need to add to every projected plan, “weather

permitting.” The sojourner in the land of Egypt knows, as he goes to his

rest at night, that, whatever misfortune to-morrow may bring, it will be

lightened by joyous sunshine. Nor need the sans-sous lack entertainment

in this city of the Nile. One had but to stroll to the vicinity of the

Esbekieh Gardens to hear a band concert, to see some quaint native

performance, or to find some excitement afoot. At all hours of the day

those fortunate beings whose names graced the pages of Pia’s society

papers displayed their charms to the watching throng. At frequent

intervals the Khedive and his bodyguard thundered by. Now and then the

bellow of Cairo’s champion saïs heralded the approach of the Khedive’s

master, Lord Cromer. Nay, entertainment there was never lacking—merely

food.

When my ticket ran out on the morning of the fourth day, I did not apply

at once for another. The evening before, the Greek proprietor of a

famous cigarette factory had promised me a position, had even explained

to me my probable duties as general porter in the establishment. But

when I had inveigled my way into the inner sanctum for the second time,

it was only to learn that a compatriot of the proprietor had applied

earlier in the morning, and was already at work. Not to be outdone by

his fellow-faranchees, the Greek offered me—a letter of introduction.

The hour of public audiences at the rectory was passed. The day,

moreover, was Saturday, a half-holiday among contractors. In the hope of

earning a night’s lodging by some errand, I joined the howling mob of

guides, interpreters, street-hawkers, and fakirs, before Shepherd’s

Hotel. I was the sole Frank in the gathering. Die Kameraden, whatever

their nationality, would have been transfixed with horror had they seen

one of their own patrician class competing with “niggers” for

employment. As a last resort, had “the business” been utterly outrooted

in Cairo, the members of “the union” might have consented to busy

themselves with some genteel occupation; but had gaunt starvation

squatted on his haunches in their path, they would never have stooped to

the work of natives.

My presence was soon noised through all the screaming multitude, and I

was cleverly “pocketed” by a dozen snake swallowers and sword jugglers,

and gradually forced towards the outskirts of the crowd. When I resorted

to force and beat my way to the front rank, I was little better off than

before. For two hours I watched the natives about me selling, begging,

running errands, or marching away to guide a tourist party through the

city; without once seeing a beckoning finger in answer to my own offers

of service. At frequent intervals, a lady appeared on the hotel piazza,

ran her eyes slowly over the front ranks, stared at me a moment, and,

summoning some one-eyed rascal beside me, sent him across the city with

a perfumed note. The ladies, certainly, were not to be blamed. It was so

much more romantic; there was so much more local color in one’s doings,

don’t you know, if one’s errands were run by a Cairene in flowing robes,

rather than by a tramp such as one could see at home any day in St.

Charles or Madison Square! What if one paid an exorbitant price for such

services? It was to a picturesque figure, don’t you know, whose English

was excruciatingly funny.

It is half disgusting, half pathetic, this ebb and flow of the

population of Egypt at the crook of a tourist finger. From the door, on

which every eye was fixed, emerged the blatant figure of a pompous

pork-packer, or the half-baked offspring of a self-made ancestry. With a

wild howl the mob rose en masse and surged forward, threatening to break

my ribs against the foot of the piazza. If the pork packer scowled, the

throng fell back like a receding tide. If the half-baked offspring

raised an eyebrow, the multitude swept on, tossing me far up the steps

into the arms of “buttons,” on guard against the besiegers below.

He was a coarse-grained cockney, this “buttons,” and, in carrying out

his orders to repel boarders, he was neither a respecter of persons nor

of his mother tongue. A score of times I was pushed down the steps I had

not chosen to ascend, with a violence and profanity out of all keeping

with racial brotherhood.

[Illustration: An abandoned mosque outside the walls of Cairo, and a

caravan off for Suez across the desert]

But every dog has his day. A sallow youth issued from the hotel and

called for a man to carry a letter. “Buttons” was already raising a hand

to point out a pock-marked Arab who had departed on four commissions

since my arrival, when the tidal wave of humanity set me on the piazza.

I shouted to the sallow youth just as “buttons” fell upon me. The youth

nodded. It was a long-sought opportunity. I reversed rôles with the

cockney and landed him in a picturesque spread-eagle on the heads of the

backsheesh-seeking multitude. Had he not been wont to use his influence

in favor of a very limited number of the throng, he would have been more

immaculate in appearance, when he was dug out by his pock-marked

confederate and restored to his coign of vantage. Meanwhile I had

received the letter and a five piastre piece in payment, and had

departed on my errand.

The coin paid my evening meal and a lodging for two nights in “the

union,” and left me coppers enough for a native breakfast. Sunday was no

time either to “forage,” or to visit rectors of the church of England.

In company with Pia, who would under no circumstances use his inventive

pen on the Sabbath, I visited those few corners of Cairo to which my

search had not yet led me; the Mohammedan University of El Azkar, the

citadel, and the ruined mosques beyond the walls.

When all other resources fail him, the Anglo-Saxon wanderer has one

unfailing friend in the East—Tommy Atkins. However penniless and

forlorn he may be, the glimpse of a red jacket and a monkey cap on a

lithe, erect figure, hurrying through the foreign throng, is certain

to give him new heart. Thomas has become a familiar sight in Cairo

since the days of the Arabi rebellion. Down by the Kasr-el-Nil bridge,

out in the shadows of the pencil-like minarets of Mohammed Ali’s

mosque, in parade grounds scattered through the city, he may be found

any afternoon perspiringly chasing a football or setting up his

wickets in the screaming sunlight, to the astonishment and delight of

a never-failing audience of apathetic natives. He doesn’t pose as a

philanthropist—simple T. Atkins—nor as a man of iron-bound

morality—rather prides himself, in fact, on his incorrigible

wickedness. But the case has yet to be recorded in which he has not

given up his last shilling more whole heartedly than the smug tourist

would part with his cigar band.

Thomas, however, has no overwhelming love for “furriners—Dutchmen,

dagoes, and such like.” It would be out of keeping with his profession.

That was why Pia, after pointing out to me the least public entrance to

the cavalry barracks, on this Sunday noon, strolled on down the street.

The officers’ dinner was already steaming when I was welcomed by the six

privates of that day’s mess squad. By the time it had been served, I was

lending the cooks able assistance in disposing of the plentiful

remnants, amid the stories and laughter of a red-coats’ messroom. Even

the bulging pockets with which I departed were less cheering than the

last bellow from the barrack’s kitchen:—“Drop in to mess any day, Yank,

till you land something. No bloody need to let your belly cave in while

there’s a khaki suit in Cairo.”

I was admitted to the library of the Reverend —— the following morning

without so much as a hinted challenge from Maghmoód. The good rector was

more distressed than surprised that I had not yet found work.

“The difficulty is right here,” he cried, as he made out a second Asile

ticket. “No one will hire you in those rags, if you have a dozen trades.

I must pick you up something that looks less disreputable. Come on

Wednesday. I shall surely have something to offer.”

I fished out the note of the Greek cigarette maker and bore greetings

from one European resident to another for two days more. On the third, I

returned to the rectory and received a bundle of astonishing bulk.

“These things may not all fit you,” said the rector, “but it is all we

have been able to collect.”

Red-eyed with hope, I hurried back to the Asile and opened the package.

Just what I should have represented in the garments that came to view I

have not yet concluded. On top was a pair of trousers, in excellent

condition, but of that screaming pattern of unabashed checks in which

our cartoonists are accustomed to garb bookmakers and Tammany

politicians. In texture, they were just the thing—for Arctic explorers,

and they resigned in despair some four inches above my Nazarene

slippers. Next came a white shirt, with a mighty expanse of board-like

bosom—and without a single button; then the low-cut vest of a dress

suit, and, lastly, a minister’s long frock coat, with wide, silk-faced

lapels.

The first shock over, I bore the treasure back to the rectory. But the

good padre refused to unburden me. “Oh, I don’t want them around the

house!” he protested, “If you can’t wear them, sell them.” Even the

proprietor of “the union,” however, refused to come to my rescue. With

much cajoling, I lured an unsophisticated newcomer at the Asile inside

the vest and trousers, and intrusted the other garments to the

safe-keeping of Cap Stevenson.

The endless stream of notes, having its source at the office of Cook and

Son, flowed on unchecked. If my object had been merely to gain intimate

acquaintance with the Cairenes of all classes, I could not have chosen a

better method. No tourist, with his howling bodyguard of guides and

dragomans, ever peeped into half the strange corners to which my

wanderings led me. My command of Arabic, too, increased by leaps and

bounds; for the necessity of giving expression of my innermost thoughts

to the servant body of Cairo required an ever-increasing vocabulary.

The two-hundredth letter of introduction—if my count be not at

fault—took me to that ultra-fashionable world across the Nile. The

director of the Jockey Club read the latest epistle carefully, and, with

sportsman-like fairness, gave me another. The delivery thereof required

my presence in the great Gezireh Hotel. For once I was not even

challenged by the army of servants; the very audacity of my entrance

into those Elysian Fields left the astonished domestics standing in

petrified rows behind me. The superintendent was most kind. He gave me,

even without the asking, a letter of introduction! The curse of Cain on

him who invented the written character! My entire Cairene experience had

been bounded by this endless chain of notes through all the cycle of her

cosmopolitan inhabitants.

The new missive carried me back to Shepherd’s Hotel, and for once I

escaped employment by a hair’s breadth. The portly Swiss manager was

inclined to overlook the shortcomings in my attire. He needed a cellar

boy, could use another porter, or “you may do as a bell-boy,” he mused,

with half-closed eyes, “if—”

What vision was this? Might I aspire even to displace mine ancient

enemy, in all the splendor of two close rows of bright, brass buttons,

and pace majestically back and forth with the sang-froid of a lion

tamer, above the common horde I had so lately quitted? What folly to

keep silent concerning those acquirements that especially fitted me to

serve a cosmopolitan clientèle, while fickle fortune was holding forth

this golden prize! I broke in upon the manager’s brown study with a

deluge of German. He opened wide his eyes. I addressed him in French. He

sputtered with astonishment. I continued in Italian. He waved his hands

above his head like a swimmer about to go down for the third time. I

added a savoring of Spanish and Arabic for good measure, and he clutched

weakly at a hotel pillar.

Gradually, strength returned to his trembling limbs. He rubbed his

astonished gorge with a ham-like hand and dislodged an imprisoned

shriek:—“Aber, mein lieber Kerl! Speaking all those langvages and out of

a job—and in rhags! Why—you—you—you must haf been up to some crhooked

business, yes?” He glanced fearfully about him at the silver ornaments

of the office. “I—I—I am very sorry, we haf not now a single vacancy.

But—but you vill not haf the least trouble—mit so viel’ Sprachen—in

getting a position, not the slightest! I gif you a note—to Cook and

Son.”

I wandered sadly away across the city and stumbled upon the American

legation. Long battle won me admittance to the office of the secretary.

Beyond that I could not force my way. The secretary heard my case, and,

eager to be off to some afternoon function, thrust an official sheet

into his typewriter and set forth in a “to-whom-it-may-concern” the

half-dozen trades I mentioned; and several others to which I had never

aspired. A second sheet he ruined with a score of addresses, and bade me

be gone. If there was any corner of Cairo from Heliopolis to Masr el

Attika which I had not already visited, these documents soon repaired

the oversight. Two days the new task required, and it brought no reward,

save one. The head of the Egyptian railway system promised me a pass to

the coast when I chose to leave the country. I did not choose at once,

and, returning on the third day to the legation, fought my way into the

sanctum of the consul-general himself.

“If you are looking for work of a specific character,” said that

gentleman, “I can do no more than has already been done—give you more

addresses. If you are merely looking for _work_, I can give you

employment at once.”

I pleaded indifference to qualifying adjectives.

The consul chose a card from his case, turned it over, and wrote on the

back:—“Tom;—Let Franck do it.”

“Take this,” he said, “to my residence; it is opposite that of Lord

Cromer, near the Nile, and give it to my butler.”

“Tom,” the commander-in-chief of the servant body of a vast

establishment, proved to be a young American of the pleasantest type. I

came upon him dancing blindly around the ballroom of Mr. Morgan’s

residence, and shouting himself hoarse with the Arabic variation of “Get

a move on!” The consul, it transpired, was to give a dinner, with

dancing, to the lights of society wintering in the city. In the two days

that remained before the eventful evening the ballroom floor must be

properly waxed. Twelve native workmen, lured thither by the

extraordinary wage of twenty-five cents a day, had been holding down the

aforementioned floor since early morning. About them was spread powdered

wax. In their hands were long bottles. Above them towered the dancing

butler.

“Put some strength into it,” he bellowed, by way of variation, as I

stepped across the room towards him. For the three succeeding strokes,

the dozen bottles, moving in unison, to the chant of a thirteenth

“workman” who had been hired to squat in a far corner and furnish vocal

inspiration, nearly crushed the powdered wax under them. But this

unseemly display of energy was of short duration.

I delivered the cabalistic message. The Arabs bounded half across the

room at sound of the shriek emitted by its addressee:—“I’ll fire ’em!”

bellowed Tom. “I’ll fire ’em _now_. An American? I’m delighted, old man!

Get on the job while I kick these niggers down the stairs. Had any

experience at this game?”

I recalled a far-off college gymnasium, and nodded.

“Take you’re own gait, only so you get it done,” cried the butler,

charging the fleeing Arabs.

I discarded the bottle process and rigged up an apparatus after the

fashion of a handled holly-stone. By evening, the polishing was half

completed. When I turned my attention to the dust-streaked windows, late

the next afternoon, the ballroom floor was in a condition that boded ill

for any but sure-footed dancers. The outbreak of festivities found me

general assistant to the culinary department, separated only by a

Japanese screen from the contrasting class of society; represented by

such guests as Lord Cromer and his youthful Lady, the ex-Empress

Eugenie, the Crown Prince of Sweden, and the brother of the Khedive.

Deeply did I regret the lack of inventiveness that forced me to report

to the sleepless inmates of the Asile to which Cap Stevenson admitted me

long after closing hours, that the conversation of so distinguished a

gathering had been commonplace, the dancing unanimated, and the flirting

unseemly.

By arrangement with Tom, I continued to “do it” long after the day of

the ball. The fare at the servants’ table was beyond criticism, but I

declined a blanket and a straw-strewn stall in the consul’s stable, and

retained my cot at the Asile at a daily cost of two piastres. As my

earnings grew, I repaired, one night, to the American Mission Hospital,

mounted to the third story, knocked on the first door to the right,

pushed it open, and astonished an aged missionary from Pittsburg out of

a night’s labor. One idle hour, too, I examined again the garments I had

left with Cap Stevenson and found them less useless than I had once

imagined. The shirt, being tied together, front and back, with string,

awoke the envy of all the “comrades.” For the bosom was of many layers,

and, as each one became soiled, I had but to strip it off, and behold!—a

clean shirt. When I had laid the bundle away again, it contained only

the minister’s frock coat.

Cap Stevenson had made a scientific study of the genus vagabundus that

enabled him to gauge with surprising precision the demands that would be

made on the Asile from day to day. There fell into my hands, one

evening, a Cairo newspaper, containing the following item:—

SUEZ, _February 2d, 1905_.

The French troop-ship ——, outward bound to Madagascar with five

hundred recruits, reports that while midway between Port Saïd and

Ismaïlia, in her passage of the canal, five recruits who had been

standing at the rail suddenly sprang overboard and swam for the

shore. One was carried under and crushed by the ship’s screw. The

others landed and were last seen hurrying away into the desert. All

concerned were Germans.

I entered the office to point out the item to the superintendent.

“Aye,” said Cap, “I’ve seen it. That’s common enough. They’ll be here

for dinner day after to-morrow.”

They arrived exactly at the hour named, the four of them, weather-beaten

and bedraggled from their swim and the tramp across the desert, but

supplied with the Reverend ——’s tickets. Two of the quartet were very

engaging fellows with whom I was soon on intimate terms. One of this

pair had spent some months in Egypt years before, after using the same

means to make the passage from Europe.

On the Friday after their arrival, this man of experience met me at the

gate of the Asile as I returned from my day’s labor.

“Heh! Amerikaner,” he began, “do you get a half holiday to-morrow?”

“Sure,” I answered.

“I’m going to take Hans out for a moonlight view of the Pyramids. It’s

full moon and all the tourist companies are sending out tally-ho

parties. Want to go along?”

I did, of course. The next afternoon I left the Asile in company with

the pair. At the door of the office, I halted to pay my night’s lodging.

[Illustration: Spinners in the sun outside the walls of Cairo]

[Illustration: Guests of the Asile Rudolph, Cairo. François, champion

beggar, in the center, in the cape he wore as part of his “system”]

“Never mind that,” said Adolph, the man of experience, “we’ll sleep out

there.”

“Eh?” cried Hans and I.

Adolph pushed open the outer gate, and we followed.

“Suppose you’ll pay our lodging at the Mena House?” grinned Hans, as we

crossed the Kasr-el-Nil bridge.

“Don’t worry,” replied Adolph.

We pushed through the throng of donkey boys beyond the bridge and,

ignoring the electric line that connects Cairo with the pyramids of

Gizeh, covered the eight miles on foot. Darkness fell soon after our

arrival, and with it rose an unveiled moon. The tourists were out in

force. Adolph led the way in and out among the ancient monuments and

pointed out the most charming views with the discernment of an

antiquarian. The desert night soon turned cold. The tourist parties

strolled away to the great hotel below the hill, and Hans fell to

shivering.

“Where’s this fine lodging you’re telling about?” he chattered.

“Komm’ mal her,” said Adolph.

He picked his way over the tumbled blocks towards the third pyramid,

climbed a few feet up its northern face, and disappeared in a black

hole. We followed, and, doubled up like balls, slid down, down, down a

sharply inclined tunnel, some three feet square, into utter darkness. As

our feet touched a stone floor, Adolph struck a match. The flame showed

two small vaults and several huge stone sarcophagi.

“Beds waiting for us, you see?” said Adolph. “Probably you’ve chatted

with the fellows who used to sleep here? They’re in the British Museum,

in London.”

He dropped the match and climbed into one of the coffins. I chose

another and found it as comfortable as a stone bed can be, though a bit

short. Our sleeping chamber was warm, somewhat too warm in fact, and

Hans, given to snoring, awoke echoes that resounded through the vaults

like the beating of forty drums. But the night passed quickly, and, when

our sense of time told us that morning had come, we crawled upward on

hands and knees through the tunnel and out into a sunlight that left us

blinking painfully for several moments.

A throng of tourists and Arabian rascals was surging about the

monuments. A quartet of khaki-clad Britishers kicked their heels on the

forehead of the Sphinx, puffing at their pipes as they exchanged the

latest garrison jokes. We fought our way through the clinging Arabs,

climbed to the summit of the pyramid of Cheops, took in the regulation

“sights,” and strolled back to Cairo.

Many a strange bit of human driftwood floated ashore in the Asile

Rudolph, but their stories would take too long in the telling. Yet no

account of that winter season in Cairo would be complete without mention

of “François.” François was, of course, a Frenchman, a Parisian, in

fact, and, contrary to the usual rule, it was he, and not a German, who

won and still holds the mendicant championship of Egypt. To all who

spoke French, he was known as the most loquacious and jolly lodger at

the Asile. The Reverend —— had long since turned him away from the door

of the rectory; but François would not be driven from his accustomed

bed, and paid his two piastres nightly.

As a young man the Frenchman had worked faithfully at his trade; he

admitted it with shame. Three years in the army, however, had awakened

within him an uncontrollable Wanderlust, and during the twenty-three

years since his discharge, he had tramped through every country of

Europe. He was a man of meager education and by no means the native

ability of Pia and many of the German colony. But long years before his

arrival in Egypt, he had evolved “un système” to which his fame as a

mendicant was due. The first part of this system concerned his personal

appearance. He was pale of complexion, though in reality very robust,

and he had trained his shoulders into a droop that suggested the last

stages of consumption. His garb, in general, was that of a French

workman, but over this he wore a cloak with a long cape that gave him an

aspect not unlike a monk, and, combined with his drooping shoulders and

sallow, long-drawn face, created a figure so forlorn as to attract

attention in any clime. Nothing, François asserted, had contributed so

much to his success as this cloak. Rain or shine, from the Highlands of

Scotland to the shores of the Black Sea, in the depth of winter or in

midsummer, he had clung to this garb for twenty years, replacing in that

time a dozen cloaks by others of identical design. Even in Egypt he

refused to appear in public without this superfluous outer garment, and,

though the African sun had turned the threadbare cape almost as yellow

as the desert sands, he was not to be separated from it until he had

picked up another in some charitable institution of the city.

The second part of François’s system was extremely simple. The method

which Pia so successfully manipulated was too complicated for a man of

little schooling; yet François rarely made a verbal appeal for alms. On

a score of cards, which he carried ever ready in a pocket of his cloak,

was written in as many languages this petition:—

“I am ill and in misery. Please help me.”

The French card was his own production. The others he had collected from

time to time as he made friends in the various countries he had visited.

For, with all his wanderings, François knew hardly a word of any

language but his own.

I set out with the French champion, one Sunday afternoon, to visit the

mosque of Sultan Hassan. Not far from the Asile gate, he caught sight of

a well-dressed man, whose appearance stamped him as a German. François

shuffled his cards with a hasty hand, chose the one in the corner of

which was written, in tiny letters, the word “allemand,” and set off at

a trot. Arrived within a few paces of his intended victim, he fell into

a measured tread, thrust out the card, and waited with sorrowful face

and hanging head. The German returned the card with a five-piastre

piece.

Cairo is nothing if not cosmopolitan, and it is doubtful if every one of

the cards did not make its appearance at least once during the

afternoon. American tourists, English officers, French entrepreneurs,

Greek priests, Italian merchants, Turkish clerks, Indian travelers, even

the Arab scribes sitting imperturbable beside their umbrella-shaded

stands,—all had the misery of François called to their attention.

Whether it was out of gratitude for a sight of the familiar words of his

native tongue, or out of pity for the abject creature who coughed so

distressingly and pointed to his ears like a deaf mute whenever a

question was put to him, rare was the man who did not give something.

François collected more than a hundred piastres during that single

promenade. Yet before we set out he had called me aside and drawn from

an inner pocket a purse that contained twenty-six English sovereigns in

gold!

But it was his method of dispensing his income that made the Frenchman

an enigma to his confidants. François neither drank nor smoked; he

rarely, if ever, indulged even in the mildest dissipation. Not far from

the Asile, he stopped at a café for his petit déjeuner of chocolate and

rolls and his morning paper; and, had he met the Khedive himself out for

a stroll, François would not have appealed to him before that breakfast

was over. He was strictly a union man, was François, in his hours of

labor.

But his daily expenditures were for bed and breakfast only. There were

scores of French chefs in Cairo, ever ready to welcome whomever knew the

kitchen door and the language of the cuisine. If his shoes wore out,

there were several French shops in the vicinity of the Esbekieh Gardens.

If he were in need of nothing more costly than a bar of soap, François

begged one of the first druggist he came upon. The sovereigns which

cosmopolitan Cairo thrust upon him were spent almost entirely for

souvenirs for his relatives in Paris. The most costly albums of Cairene

views, fine brass ware, dainty ornaments of native manufacturer were

packed in the bazaars and shipped away to those fortunate brothers,

sisters, and cousins of François in the French capital. Only once in

twenty-three years had he visited them, but few were the towns and

cities of all Europe the arts and manufactures of which were not

represented in that Parisian household. As a supplement to his gifts,

there came semi-annually a letter from François, announcing some new

success in his career as a traveling salesman.

[Illustration: An Arab market-day at the village of Gizeh]

A Vagabond Journey Around the World: A Narrative of Personal Experience · 第 9 / 22 章