MR. ADJECTIVE TRIED FOR STEALING.
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ful
like
ly
y
ous
less
en
ern
CLEVER MR. ADJECTIVE]
There was great excitement in the court the next day; and when every
one was assembled, except Adjective, the Judge called out: “Bring the
prisoner in;” and poor Adjective was led in between two Critics, with
his hands tied behind him, and placed before the Judge.
Serjeant Parsing rose, and began to question him.
“Is your name Adjective?” he said. “It is,” answered Adjective.
“And you possess all the adjectives in Grammar-land?”
“I do.”
“What is an adjective?”
“A word used to qualify a noun.”
“What is a noun?”
“Please, my lord, need I answer that?” asked Adjective.
“Certainly,” replied the Judge.
“It is not fair,” said Adjective; “nouns are not my words.”
“But you must know what a noun is, in order that you may use your
adjectives properly.”
“Of course I know what a noun is--it is a _name_, the name of anything.”
“Then do you know the difference between a noun and an adjective?”
asked Serjeant Parsing.
“Certainly. A _noun_ is the name of a thing. An _adjective_ tells you
something about the thing the noun has named; whether it is large or
small, or what colour it is, or how much there is of it, or whether
there are few things or many, or something of that sort.”
“Quite so; but can you find out at once, without much thinking, whether
a word is a noun or an adjective?”
“If you can put an article before a word, then it is a noun,” answered
Adjective; “as, _a_ man, _the_ dog.”
“Then when I say, ‘Pity the poor,’ of course _poor_ is a noun, is it?”
“No,” said Adjective, quickly; “_poor_ is my word, I know, for you can
say _poor_ child, a _poor_ thing. ‘Pity the poor’ really means, ‘Pity
the poor people;’ but Mr. Noun is so stingy, that when he thinks the
sentence will be understood without his word, he just leaves it out,
and then people say the noun is _understood_.”
“Exactly so; but your way of finding out a noun does not answer, you
see, for the first time I try it, you tell me the word I have found is
an adjective.”
“It always answers unless there happens to be a word understood,”
replied Adjective, “and then it answers if you use your reason; for any
one would know that you are not asked to pity a thing called a _poor_,
but to pity poor people. But it is not fair, my lord,” continued
Adjective, turning to the Judge. “Here am I, a poor prisoner, unjustly
accused of stealing, and Mr. Parsing is trying to puzzle me as much as
he can.”
“Not at all,” replied Serjeant Parsing. “I only want you to be sure
that you know clearly the difference between a noun and an adjective.”
“I do,” answered Adjective, “quite clearly.”
“Well, then, answer this question. What is the word _beauty_?”
“Beauty?” repeated Adjective, getting rather red; “_beauty_ is a noun.”
“Yes,” said Serjeant Parsing; “and _grace_, and _home_, and _duty_?”
“They are all nouns,” answered Adjective, looking uncomfortable.
“Yes; now another question. What is _beautiful_?”
“Beautiful?” repeated Adjective, looking _very_ red now; “_beautiful_
is an adjective.”
“Very well. Now, Mr. Adjective,” said Serjeant Parsing, “kindly tell me
how you got the adjective _beautiful_?”
“I made it,” answered Adjective, with his eyes on the ground.
“How did you make it?”
“I stuck _ful_ on to _beauty_. When I want to say a thing is full of
beauty I call it _beautiful_.”
“And how did you get _beauty_, since it belongs to Mr. Noun?” asked
Serjeant Parsing.
“I took it,” replied Adjective, still looking down.
“Which means to say that you stole it. It is quite clear that you stole
it, and that you did the same to _grace_, _home_, _duty_, and others,
to make _graceful_, _homely_, _dutiful_, and the rest. My lord, I think
I need say nothing more: the prisoner himself owns that he took these
words; it only remains for you to give him his punishment.”
The Judge looked very grave, and was beginning to say, “Mr. Adjective,
I am very sorry----” when Serjeant Parsing interrupted him, and said:--
“Please, my lord, I am going to take the other side now. Will you order
Mr. Noun to come forward to be questioned?”
“Certainly,” said the Judge; and Mr. Noun approached.
“Mr. Noun?” said Serjeant Parsing.
“The same, sir,” said Mr. Noun; “all nouns belong to me.”
“You know a noun when you see it?”
“Of course I know my own words.”
“And you know an adjective?”
“Yes; an adjective is a word that tells something about one of my
nouns.”
“Very good. Now can you tell me whether _happy_ is a noun?”
“Certainly not. It is an adjective. You can say a happy boy, a happy
thing.”
“Exactly so. Now will you tell me what _happiness_ is?”
“Happiness,” repeated Mr. Noun, getting suddenly very red, for he saw
what was coming; “happiness is a noun, it is mine.”
“Oh!” said Serjeant Parsing; “how did you get it?”
“I made it.”
“How?”
“I joined _happy_ and _ness_ together.”
“H’m!” said Serjeant Parsing. “I will not ask you where you found such
a silly word as _ness_, but _happy_ you said just now belongs to Mr.
Adjective, so of course you took it from him.”
Mr. Noun did not answer, but looked down, exceedingly red and
uncomfortable.
“My lord,” said Serjeant Parsing to the Judge, “need I say any more.
This Mr. Noun, who would have Adjective put in prison for stealing,
has been doing the very same thing himself. _Happiness_, _prettiness_,
_silliness_, _cleverness_, and almost all the words that end in _ness_,
are nouns made from adjectives. If Mr. Noun would give them all up,
I have no doubt Mr. Adjective would then give up his _beautiful_,
_useful_, _graceful_, and other adjectives that are made from nouns.”
“No, no,” said the Judge; “I will have no giving up. When a word is
once made it is made for good, and instead of blaming those who take
their neighbour’s words to make new ones for themselves, I consider
that they are very much to be praised. Critics, untie Mr. Adjective’s
hands. Mr. Adjective, I am glad to hear you are so clever in making new
words, and I give you full permission to make as many more as you can,
by borrowing either from Mr. Noun or from any other Part-of-Speech.
Have you any other ending to put on besides _ful_?”
“My lord,” said Adjective, whose hands were now untied, and who was
standing free and upright before the Judge, “my lord, I have a whole
string of tails which I keep ready to make adjectives with. Here are
some of them: _ful_, _like_, _ly_, _y_, _ous_, _less_, _en_, and _ern_;
and this is the way I stick them on: _beautiful_, _ladylike_, _manly_,
_dirty_, _poisonous_, _careless_, _golden_, _western_, and with your
lordship’s kind permission, I will make such words as often as I can.”
“Do so,” replied the Judge. “And you, Mr. Noun, remember, that you
are to allow Adjective to take your words whenever he requires them,
for you ought to know that words in Grammar-land are not like pennies
in Matter-of-fact-land. _There_, if some one steals a penny from you,
he has it and you have not; but _here_, in Grammar-land, when any one
takes your words to make new ones, it makes him richer, but you are
none the poorer for it. You have _beauty_ still, although Mr. Adjective
has made _beautiful_; and you have _lady_, and _man_, and _gold_,
although Mr. Adjective has made _ladylike_, and _manly_, and _golden_.
You ought to have known this, Mr. Noun, and not to have accused Mr.
Adjective of stealing. Therefore, as a punishment, I require you to
send into Schoolroom-shire a list of nouns that may be made into
adjectives by the addition of some of Mr. Adjective’s tails.”
The Judge then left the court, and this is the list that Mr. Noun sent
into Schoolroom-shire.
_Nouns to be made into Adjectives._
Truth Lady Child Dirt
Faith Man Baby Wood
Hope Love Fool Fire
Care Gold North Poison
Sleep Wood East Danger
Sense Silk West Virtue
_Adjective endings that may be added to Nouns._
_ful_ _like_ or _ly_ _ish_ _y_
_less_ _en_ _ern_ _ous_ (meaning
full of)
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