NEW-YEAR'S CALLS.
"Le jour de l'an," as the French call the first day of January, is
indeed the principal day of the year to those who still keep up
the custom of calling and receiving calls. But in New York it is a
custom which is in danger of falling into desuetude, owing to the
size of the city and the growth of its population. There are,
however, other towns and "much country" (as the Indians say)
outside of New York, and there are still hospitable boards at
which the happy and the light-hearted, the gay and the thoughtful,
may meet and exchange wishes for a happy New-Year.
To those who receive calls we would say that it is well, if
possible, to have every arrangement made two or three days before
New-Year's, as the visiting begins early--sometimes at eleven
o'clock--if the caller means to make a goodly day. A lady should
have her hair dressed for the day when she rises, and if her dress
be not too elaborate she should put it on then, so that she may be
in the drawing-room when the first visitor arrives. In regard to
the question of dress, we should say that for elderly ladies black
satin or velvet, or any of the combination dresses so fashionable
now, with handsome lace, and Swedish gloves of pearl or tan color
(not white kids; these are decidedly rococo, and not in fashion),
would be appropriate. A black satin, well made, and trimmed with
beaded _passementerie_, is perhaps the handsomest dress that could
be worn by any one. Brocaded silk, plain gros grain, anything that
a lady would wear at the wedding reception of her daughter is
suitable, although a plain dress is in better taste.
For young ladies nothing is so pretty as a dress of light cashmere
and silk, cut high at the throat. These dresses, in the very
pretty tints worn now, are extremely becoming, warm-looking, and
appropriate for a reception, when the door is being often opened.
White dresses of thick silk or cashmere, trimmed around the neck
with lace, are also very elegant. In all countries young married
women are allowed to be as magnificent as a picture of Marie de
Medici, and can wear on New-Year's day rose-colored and white
brocaded silks, with pearl trimmings, or plain ciel blue, or
prawn-colored silk over white, or embossed velvet, or what they
please, so that the dress is cut high, and has sleeves to the
elbow. Each lady should have near her an ermine cloak, or a small
camel's-hair shawl in case of draughts. It is not good taste to
wear low-necked or sleeveless dresses during the day-time. They
are worn by brides on their wedding-day sometimes, but at
receptions or on New-Year's day scarcely ever.
While much magnificence is permissible, still a plain black or
dark silk dress, if well made, with fresh ruffles at neck and
wrists, is quite as proper as anything else, and men generally
admire it more. But where a lady has several daughters to receive
with her, she should study the effect of her rooms, and dress the
young ladies in prettily contrasting colors. This may be cheaply
done by using the soft, fine merinoes, which are to be had in all
the delicate and fashionable shades. Short dresses of this
material are much used; but now that imported dresses are so
easily obtained, a mother with many daughters to dress cannot do
better than buy costumes similar to those worn by economical
French ladies on their _jour de l'an_. One article of dress is _de
rigeur_. With whatever style of costume, gloves must be worn.
A lady who expects to have many calls, and who wishes to offer
refreshments, should have hot tea and coffee and a bowl of punch
on a convenient table; or, better still, a silver kettle filled
with bouillon standing in the hall, so that a gentleman coming in
or going out can take a cup of it unsolicited. If she lives in an
English basement house, this table can be in the lower
dining-room. In a house three rooms deep the table and all the
refreshments can be in the usual dining-room or in the upper
back-parlor. Of course, her "grand spread" can be as gorgeous as
she pleases. Hot oysters, salads, boned turkey, quail, and hot
terrapin, with wines _ad libitum_, are offered by the wealthy; but
this is a difficult table to keep in order when ten men call at
one o'clock, and forty at four, and none between. The best table
is one which is furnished with boned turkey, jellied tongues, and
_pts_, sandwiches, and similar dishes, with cake and fruit as
decorative additions. The modern and admirable adjunct of a
spirit-lamp under a teakettle keeps the bouillon, tea, and coffee
always hot, and these, with the teacups necessary to serve them,
should be on a small table at one side. A maid-servant, neatly
dressed, should be in constant attendance on this table, and a
man-servant or two will be needed to attend the door and to wait
at table.
The man at the door should have a silver tray or card-basket in
which to receive the cards of visitors. If a gentleman is not
known to the lady of the house, he sends in his card; otherwise he
leaves it with the waiter, who deposits it in some receptacle
where it should be kept until the lady has leisure to examine the
cards of all her guests. If a gentleman is calling on a young
lady, and is not known to the hostess, he sends in his card to the
former, who presents him to the hostess and to all the ladies
present. If the room is full, an introduction to the hostess only
is necessary. If the room is comparatively empty, it is much
kinder to present a gentleman to each lady, as it tends to make
conversation general. As a guest is about to depart, he should be
invited to take some refreshment, and be conducted towards the
dining-room for that purpose. This hospitality should never be
urged, as man is a creature who dines, and is seldom willing to
allow a luncheon to spoil a dinner. In a country neighborhood,
however, or after a long walk, a visitor is almost always glad to
break his fast and enjoy a pickled oyster, a sandwich, or a cup of
bouillon.
The etiquette of New-Year's day commands, peremptorily, that a
gentleman shall not be asked to take off his overcoat nor to be
relieved of his hat. He will probably prefer to wear his overcoat,
and to carry his hat in his hand during his brief visit. If he
wishes to dispose of either, he will do so in the hall; but on
that point he is a free moral agent, and it is not a part of the
duty of a hostess to suggest what he shall do with his clothes.
Many letters come to us asking "What subjects should be talked
about during a New-Year's call." Alas! we can only suggest the
weather and the good wishes appropriate to the season. The
conversation is apt to be fragmentary. One good _mot_ was evolved
a few years ago, when roads were snowy and ways were foul. A
gentleman complained of the mud and the dirty streets. "Yes," said
the lady, "but it is very bright overhead." "I am not going that
way," replied the gentleman.
A gentleman should not be urged to stay when he calls. He has
generally but five minutes in which to express a desire that old
and pleasant memories shall be continued, that new and cordial
friendships shall be formed, and after that compliment, which
every wall-bred man pays a lady, "How remarkably well you are
looking to-day!" he wishes to be off.
In France it is the custom for a gentleman to wear a dress-coat
when calling on a great public functionary on New-Year's day, but
it is not so in America. Here he should, wear the dress in which
he would make an ordinary morning visit. When he enters a room he
should not remove his gloves, nor should he say, as he greets his
hostess, "Excuse my glove." He should take her gloved hand in his
and give it a cordial pressure, according to our pleasant American
fashion. When leaving, the ceremony is very brief--simply,
"Good-morning," or "Good-evening," as the case may be.
It is proper for gentlemen to call late in the evening of
New-Year's day, and calls are made during the ensuing evenings by
people who are otherwise occupied in the daytime. If the family
are at dinner, or the lady is fatigued with the day's duties, the
servant must say at the door that Mrs._____ desires to be excused.
He must not present the card to her, and thus oblige her to send
to her visitor a message which might be taken as a personal
affront. But she must have the servant instructed to refuse all at
certain hours; then none can be offended.
Many ladies in New York are no longer "at home" on New-Year's day;
and when this is the case a basket is tied at the door to receive
cards. They do this because so many gentlemen have given up the
custom of calling that it seems to be dying out, and all their
preparations for a reception become a hollow mockery. How many
weary women have sat with novel in hand and luncheon-table spread,
waiting for the callers who did not come! The practice of sending
cards to gentlemen, stating that a lady would be at home on
New-Year's day, has also very much gone out of fashion, owing to
the fact that gentlemen frequently did not respond to them.
It is, however, proper that a married lady returning to her home
after a long absence in Europe, or one who has changed her
residence, or who is living at a hotel or boarding-house (or who
is visiting friends), should send her card to those gentlemen whom
she wishes to receive. It must be remembered that many gentlemen,
generally those no longer young, still like very much the fashion
of visiting on New-Year's day, and go to see as many people as
they can in a brief winter's sunshine. These gentlemen deplore the
basket at the door, and the decadence of the old custom in New
York. Family friends and old friends, those whom they never see at
any other time, are to be seen--or they should be seen, so these
old friends think--on New-Year's day.
A personal call is more agreeable than a card. Let a gentleman
call, and in person, or take no notice of the day. So say the most
trustworthy authorities, and their opinion has an excellent
foundation of common-sense.
Could we only go back to the old Dutch town where the custom
started, where all animosities were healed, all offences
forgotten, on New-Year's day, when the good Dutch housewives made
their own cakes and spiced the loving-cup, when all the women
stayed at home to receive and all the men called, what a different
New-Year's day we should enjoy in New York. Nowadays, two or three
visitors arrive before the hostess is ready to receive them; then
one comes after she has appeared, vanishes, and she remains alone
for two hours; then forty come. She remembers none of their names,
and has no rational or profitable conversation with any of them.
But for the abusers of New-Year's day, the pretenders who, with no
right to call, come in under cover of the general hospitality of
the season--the bores, who on this day, as on all days, are only
tiresome--we have no salve, no patent cure. A hostess must receive
them with the utmost suavity, and be as amiable and agreeable as
possible.
New-Year's day is a very brilliant one at Washington. All the
world calls on the President at twelve o'clock; the diplomats in
full dress, officers of the army and navy in full uniform, and the
other people grandly attired. Later, the heads of departments,
cabinet ministers, judges, etc., receive the lesser lights of
society.
In Paris the same etiquette is observed, and every clerk calls on
his chief.
In a small city or village etiquette manages itself, and ladies
have only to let it be known that they will be at home, with hot
coffee and oysters, to receive the most agreeable kind of
callers--those who come because they really wish to pay a visit,
to express goodwill, and to ask for that expression of friendship
which our reserved Anglo-Saxon natures are so prone to withhold.
In New York a few years ago the temperance people made a great
onslaught on ladies who invited young men to drink on New-Year's
day. It was said to lead to much disorder and intemperance; and
so, from fear of causing one's brother to sin, many have banished
the familiar punch-bowl. In a number of well-known houses in New
York no luncheon is offered, and a cup of bouillon or coffee and a
sandwich is the usual refreshment in the richest and most stylish
houses. It will be seen, therefore, that it is a day of largest
liberty. There are no longer any sumptuary laws; but it is
impossible to say why ladies of the highest fashion in New York do
not still make it a gala-day. The multiplicity of other
entertainments, the unseen yet all-powerful influence of fashion,
these things mould the world insensibly. Yet in a thousand homes,
thousands of cordial hands will be extended on the great First of
January, and to all of them we wish a Happy New Year.