COSTLY THY HABIT.
We are often asked as to the appropriate dress to be worn at
afternoon tea, at balls, at dinners, christenings, etc.
Neatness and simple elegance should always characterize a lady,
and after that she may be as expensive as she pleases, if only at
the right time. And we may say here that simplicity and plainness
characterize many a rich woman in a high place; and one can always
tell a real lady from an imitation one by her style of dress.
Vulgarity is readily seen even under a costly garment. There
should be harmony and fitness, and suitability as to age and times
and seasons. Every one can avoid vulgarity and slovenliness; and
in these days, when the fashions travel by telegraph, one can be
_
la mode_.
French women have a genius for dress. An old or a middle-aged
woman understands how to make the best of herself in the assorting
and harmonizing of colors; she never commits the mistake of making
herself too youthful. In our country we often see an old woman
bedizened like a _Figurante_, imagining that she shall gain the
graces of youth by borrowing its garments. All this aping of
youthful dress "multiplies the wrinkles of old age, and makes its
decay more conspicuous."
For balls in this country, elderly women are not expected to go in
low neck unless they wish to, so that the chaperon can wear a
dress such as she would wear at a dinner--either a velvet or
brocade, cut in Pompadour shape, with a profusion of beautiful
lace. All her ornaments should match in character, and she should
be as unlike her charge as possible. The young girls look best in
light gossamer material, in tulle, crepe, or tarlatan, in pale
light colors or in white, while an elderly, stout woman never
looks so badly as in low-necked light-colored silks or satins,
Young women look well in natural flowers; elderly women, in
feathers and jewelled head-dresses.
If elderly women with full figure wear low-necked dresses, a lace
shawl or scarf, or something of that sort, should be thrown over
the neck; and the same advice might be given to thin and scrawny
figures. A lady writes to us as to what dress should be worn at
her child's christening. We should advise a high-necked dark silk;
it may be of as handsome material as she chooses, but it should be
plain and neat in general effect. No woman should overdress in her
own house; it is the worst taste. All dress should correspond to
the spirit of the entertainment given. Light-colored silks,
sweeping trains, bonnets very gay and garnished with feathers,
lace parasols, and light gloves, are fit for carriages at the
races, but they are out of place for walking in the streets. They
may do for a wedding reception, but they are not fit for a picnic
or an excursion. Lawn parties, flower shows, and promenade
concerts, should all be dressed for in a gay, bright fashion; and
the costumes for these and for yachting purposes may be as
effective and coquettish as possible; but for church, for
readings, for a morning concert, for a walk, or a morning call on
foot, a tailor-made costume, with plain, dark hat, is the most to
be admired. Never wear a "dressy" bonnet in the street.
The costumes for picnics, excursions, journeys; and the sea-side
should be of a strong fabric, simple cut, and plain color. Things
which will wash are better for our climate. Serge, tweed, and
piqu are the best.
A morning dress for a late breakfast may be as luxurious as one
pleases. The modern fashion of imitation lace put on in great
quantities over a foulard or a gingham, a muslin or a cotton, made
up prettily, is suitable for women of all ages; but an old
"company dress" furbished up to do duty at a watering-place is
terrible, and not to be endured.
It has been the fashion this season to wear full-dress at
weddings. The bride and her maids have appeared with low neck and
short sleeves in the cold morning air at several fashionable
churches. The groom at the same time wearing morning costume. It
is an era of low necks. The pendulum of fashion is swinging that
way. We have spoken of this before, so only record the fact that
the low neck will prevail in many summer evening dresses as well
as for morning weddings.
The very tight fashion of draping skirts should make all women
very careful as to the way they sit down. Some Frenchman said he
could tell a gentleman by his walk; another has lately said that
he can tell a lady by the way she sits down. A woman is allowed
much less freedom of posture than a man. He may change his
position as he likes, and loll or lounge, cross his legs, or even
nurse his foot if he pleases; but a woman must have grace and
dignity; in every gesture she must be "ladylike." Any one who has
seen a great actress like Modjeska sit down will know what an
acquired grace it is.
A woman should remember that she "belongs to a sex which cannot
afford to be grotesque." There should never be rowdiness or
carelessness.
The mania for extravagant dress on the stage, the _pieces des
robes_, is said to be one of the greatest enemies of the
legitimate drama. The leading lady must have a conspicuous display
of elaborate gowns, the latest inventions of the modistes. In
Paris these stage costumes set the fashions, and bonnets and caps
and gowns become individualized by their names. They look very
well on the wearers, but they look very badly on some elderly,
plain, middle-aged, stout woman who has adopted them.
Plain satins and velvet, rich and dark brocades, made by an
artist, make any one look well. The elderly woman should be able
to move without effort or strain of any kind; a black silk well
made is indispensable; and even "a celebrity of a by-gone day" may
be made to look handsome by a judicious but not too brilliant
toilette.
The dress called "complimentary mourning," which is rather a
contradiction in terms, is now made very elegant and dressy. Black
and white in all the changes, and black bugles and bead trimming,
all the shades of lilac and of purple, are considered by the
French as proper colors and trimmings in going out of black; while
for full mourning the English still preserve the cap, weepers, and
veil, the plain muslin collar and cuffs, the crape dress, large
black silk cloak, crape bonnet and veil.
Heavy, ostentatious, and expensive habiliments are often worn in
mourning, but they are not in the best taste. The plain-surfaced
black silks are commendable.
For afternoon tea in this country the hostess generally wears a
handsome high-necked gown, often a combination of stamped or
brocaded velvet, satin, and silk. She rarely wears what in England
is called a "tea-gown," which is a semi-loose garment. For
visiting at afternoon teas no change is made from the ordinary
walking dress, unless the three or four ladies who help receive
come in handsome reception dresses. A skirt of light brocade with
a dark velvet over-dress is very much worn at these receptions,
and if made by a French artist is a beautiful dress. These dark
velvets are usually made high, with a very rich lace ruff.
The high Medicean collar and pretty Medicean cap of velvet are in
great favor with the middle-aged ladies of the present day, and
are a very becoming style of dress for the opera. The present
fashion of full dress at the opera, while it may not improve the
music, certainly makes the house look very pretty and stately.
Too many dresses are a mistake, even for an opulent woman. They
get out of fashion, and excepting for a girl going out to many
balls they are entirely unnecessary. A girl who is dancing needs
to be perpetually renewed, for she should be always fresh, and the
"wear and tear" of the cotillion is enormous. There is nothing so
poor as a dirty, faded, and patched-up ball-dress; the dancer had
better stay at home than wear such.
The fashion of sleeves should be considered. A stout woman looks
very badly in a loose sleeve of hanging lace which only reaches
the elbow. It makes the arm look twice as large. She should wear,
for a thin sleeve, black lace to the wrist, with bands of velvet
running down, to diminish the size of the arm. All those lace
sleeves to the elbow, with drops of gold, or steel trimming, or
jets, are very unbecoming; no one but the slight should wear them.
Tight lacing is also very unbecoming to those who usually adopt
it--women of thirty-eight or forty who are growing a little stout.
In thus trussing themselves up they simply get an unbecoming
redness of the face, and are not the handsome, comfortable-looking
creatures which Heaven intended they should be. Two or three
beautiful women well known in society killed themselves last year
by tight lacing. The effect of an inch less waist was not apparent
enough to make this a wise sacrifice of health and ease of
breathing.
At a lady's lunch party, which is always an occasion for handsome
dress, and where bonnets are always worn, the faces of those who
are too tightly dressed always show the strain by a most
unbecoming flush; and as American rooms are always too warm, the
suffering must be enormous.
It is a very foolish plan, also, to starve one's self, or
"_bant_," for a graceful thinness; women only grow wrinkled, show
crow's-feet under the eyes, and look less young than those who let
themselves alone.
A gorgeously dressed woman in the proper place is a fine sight. A
well-dressed woman is she who understands herself and her
surroundings.