One of the good-for-noughts found himself one day without aught
and the world was straitened upon him and his patience failed; so
he lay down to sleep and gave not over sleeping till the sun
burnt him and the foam came out upon his mouth, whereupon he
arose, and he was penniless and had not so much as one dirhem.
Presently, he came to the shop of a cook, who had set up therein
his pans[FN#9] [over the fire] and wiped his scales and washed
his saucers and swept his shop and sprinkled it; and indeed his
oils[FN#10] were clear[FN#11] and his spices fragrant and he
himself stood behind his cooking-pots [waiting for custom]. So
the lackpenny went up to him and saluting him, said to him,
'Weigh me half a dirhem's worth of meat and a quarter of a
dirhem's worth of kouskoussou[FN#12] and the like of bread.' So
the cook weighed out to him [that which he sought] and the
lackpenny entered the shop, whereupon the cook set the food
before him and he ate till he had gobbled up the whole and licked
the saucers and abode perplexed, knowing not how he should do
with the cook concerning the price of that which he had eaten and
turning his eyes about upon everything in the shop.
Presently, he caught sight of an earthen pan turned over upon its
mouth; so he raised it from the ground and found under it a
horse's tail, freshly cut off, and the blood oozing from it;
whereby he knew that the cook adulterated his meat with horses'
flesh. When he discovered this default, he rejoiced therein and
washing his hands, bowed his head and went out; and when the cook
saw that he went and gave him nought, he cried out, saying,
'Stay, O sneak, O slink-thief!' So the lackpenny stopped and said
to him, 'Dost thou cry out upon me and becall [me] with these
words, O cuckold?' Whereat the cook was angry and coming down
from the shop, said, 'What meanest thou by thy speech, O thou
that devourest meat and kouskoussou and bread and seasoning and
goest forth with "Peace[FN#13][be on thee!]," as it were the
thing had not been, and payest down nought for it?' Quoth the
lackpenny, 'Thou liest, O son of a cuckold!' Wherewith the cook
cried out and laying hold of the lackpenny's collar, said, 'O
Muslims, this fellow is my first customer[FN#14] this day and he
hath eaten my food and given me nought.'
So the folk gathered together to them and blamed the lackpenny
and said to him, 'Give him the price of that which thou hast
eaten.' Quoth he, 'I gave him a dirhem before I entered the
shop;' and the cook said, 'Be everything I sell this day
forbidden[FN#15] to me, if he gave me so much as the name of a
piece of money! By Allah, he gave me nought, but ate my food and
went out and [would have] made off, without aught [said I]'
'Nay,' answered the lackpenny, 'I gave thee a dirhem,' and he
reviled the cook, who returned his abuse; whereupon he dealt him
a cuff and they gripped and grappled and throttled each other.
When the folk saw them on this wise, they came up to them and
said to them, 'What is this strife between you, and no cause for
it?' 'Ay, by Allah,' replied the lackpenny, 'but there is a cause
for it, and the cause hath a tail!' Whereupon, 'Yea, by Allah,'
cried the cook, 'now thou mindest me of thyself and thy dirhem!
Yes, he gave me a dirhem and [but] a quarter of the price is
spent. Come back and take the rest of the price of thy dirhem.'
For that he understood what was to do, at the mention of the
tail; and I, O my brother," added Aboulhusn, "my story hath a
cause, which I will tell thee."
The Khalif laughed at his speech and said, "By Allah, this is
none other than a pleasant tale! Tell me thy story and the
cause." "With all my heart," answered Aboulhusn. "Know, O my
lord, that my name is Aboulhusn el Khelia and that my father died
and left me wealth galore, of which I made two parts. One I laid
up and with the other I betook myself to [the enjoyment of the
pleasures of] friendship [and conviviality] and consorting with
comrades and boon-companions and with the sons of the merchants,
nor did I leave one but I caroused with him and he with me, and I
spent all my money on companionship and good cheer, till there
remained with me nought [of the first half of my good]; whereupon
I betook myself to the comrades and cup-companions upon whom I
had wasted my wealth, so haply they might provide for my case;
but, when I resorted to them and went round about to them all, I
found no avail in one of them, nor broke any so much as a crust
of bread in my face. So I wept for myself and repairing to my
mother, complained to her of my case. Quoth she, 'On this wise
are friends; if thou have aught, they make much of thee and
devour thee, but, if thou have nought, they cast thee off and
chase thee away.' Then I brought out the other half of my money
and bound myself by an oath that I would never more entertain
any, except one night, after which I would never again salute him
nor take note of him; hence my saying to thee, 'Far be it that
what is past should recur!' For that I will never again
foregather with thee, after this night."
When the Khalif heard this, he laughed heartily and said, "By
Allah, O my brother, thou art indeed excused in this matter, now
that I know the cause and that the cause hath a tail.
Nevertheless if it please God, I will not sever myself from
thee." "O my guest," replied Aboulhusn, "did I not say to thee,
'Far be it that what is past should recur! For that I will never
again foregather with any'?" Then the Khalif rose and Aboulhusn
set before him a dish of roast goose and a cake of manchet-bread
and sitting down, fell to cutting off morsels and feeding the
Khalif therewith. They gave not over eating thus till they were
content, when Aboulhusn brought bowl and ewer and potash[FN#16]
and they washed their hands.
Then he lighted him three candles and three lamps and spreading
the drinking-cloth, brought clarified wine, limpid, old and
fragrant, the scent whereof was as that of virgin musk. He filled
the first cup and saying, "O my boon-companion, by thy leave, be
ceremony laid aside between us! I am thy slave; may I not be
afflicted with thy loss!" drank it off and filled a second cup,
which he handed to the Khalif, with a reverence. His fashion
pleased the Khalif and the goodliness of his speech and he said
in himself, "By Allah, I will assuredly requite him for this!"
Then Aboulhusn filled the cup again and handed it to the Khalif,
reciting the following verses:
Had we thy coming known, we would for sacrifice Have poured thee
out heart's blood or blackness of the eyes;
Ay, and we would have spread our bosoms in thy way, That so thy
feet might fare on eyelids, carpet-wise.
When the Khalif heard his verses, he took the cup from his hand
and kissed it and drank it off and returned it to Aboulhusn, who
made him an obeisance and filled and drank. Then he filled again
and kissing the cup thrice, recited the following verses:
Thy presence honoureth us and we Confess thy magnanimity;
If thou forsake us, there is none Can stand to us instead of
thee.
Then he gave the cup to the Khalif, saying, "Drink [and may]
health and soundness [attend it]! It doth away disease and
bringeth healing and setteth the runnels of health abroach."
They gave not over drinking and carousing till the middle of the
night, when the Khalif said to his host, "O my brother, hast thou
in thy heart a wish thou wouldst have accomplished or a regret
thou wouldst fain do away?" "By Allah," answered he, "there is no
regret in my heart save that I am not gifted with dominion and
the power of commandment and prohibition, so I might do what is
in my mind!" Quoth the Khalif, "For God's sake, O my brother,
tell me what is in thy mind!" And Aboulhusn said, "I would to God
I might avenge myself on my neighbours, for that in my
neighbourhood is a mosque and therein four sheikhs, who take it
ill, whenas there cometh a guest to me, and vex me with talk and
molest me in words and threaten me that they will complain of me
to the Commander of the Faithful, and indeed they oppress me
sore, and I crave of God the Most High one day's dominion, that I
may beat each of them with four hundred lashes, as well as the
Imam of the mosque, and parade them about the city of Baghdad and
let call before them, 'This is the reward and the least of the
reward of whoso exceedeth [in talk] and spiteth the folk and
troubleth on them their joys.' This is what I wish and no more."
Quoth the Khalif, "God grant thee that thou seekest! Let us drink
one last cup and rise before the dawn draw near, and to-morrow
night I will be with thee again." "Far be it!" said Aboulhusn.
Then the Khalif filled a cup and putting therein a piece of
Cretan henbane, gave it to his host and said to him, "My life on
thee, O my brother, drink this cup from my hand!" "Ay, by thy
life," answered Aboulhusn, "I will drink it from thy hand." So he
took it and drank it off; but hardly had he done so, when his
head forewent his feet and he fell to the ground like a slain
man; whereupon the Khalif went out and said to his servant
Mesrour, "Go in to yonder young man, the master of the house, and
take him up and bring him to me at the palace; and when thou
goest out, shut the door."
So saying, he went away, whilst Mesrour entered and taking up
Aboulhusn, shut the door after him, and followed his master, till
he reached the palace, what while the night drew to an end and
the cocks cried out, and set him down before the Commander of the
Faithful, who laughed at him. Then he sent for Jaafer the
Barmecide and when he came before him, he said to him, "Note this
young man and when thou seest him to-morrow seated in my place of
estate and on the throne of my Khalifate and clad in my habit,
stand thou in attendance upon him and enjoin the Amirs and
grandees and the people of my household and the officers of my
realm to do the like and obey him in that which he shall command
them; and thou, if he bespeak thee of anything, do it and hearken
unto him and gainsay him not in aught in this coming day." Jaafer
answered with, "Hearkening and obedience,"[FN#17] and withdrew,
whilst the Khalif went in to the women of the palace, who came to
him, and he said to them, "Whenas yonder sleeper awaketh
to-morrow from his sleep, kiss ye the earth before him and make
obeisance to him and come round about him and clothe him in the
[royal] habit and do him the service of the Khalifate and deny
not aught of his estate, but say to him, 'Thou art the Khalif.'"
Then he taught them what they should say to him and how they
should do with him and withdrawing to a privy place, let down a
curtain before himself and slept.
Meanwhile, Aboulhusn gave not over snoring in his sleep, till the
day broke and the rising of the sun drew near, when a
waiting-woman came up to him and said to him, "O our lord [it is
the hour of] the morning- prayer." When he heard the girl's
words, he laughed and opening his eyes, turned them about the
place and found himself in an apartment the walls whereof were
painted with gold and ultramarine and its ceiling starred with
red gold. Around it were sleeping-chambers, with curtains of
gold-embroidered silk let down over their doors, and all about
vessels of gold and porcelain and crystal and furniture and
carpets spread and lamps burning before the prayer-niche and
slave-girls and eunuchs and white slaves and black slaves and
boys and pages and attendants. When he saw this, he was
confounded in his wit and said, "By Allah, either I am dreaming,
or this is Paradise and the Abode of Peace!"[FN#18] And he shut
his eyes and went to sleep again. Quoth the waiting-woman, "O my
lord, this is not of thy wont, O Commander of the Faithful!"
Then the rest of the women of the palace came all to him and
lifted him into a sitting posture, when he found himself upon a
couch, stuffed all with floss-silk and raised a cubit's height
from the ground.[FN#19] So they seated him upon it and propped
him up with a pillow, and he looked at the apartment and its
greatness and saw those eunuchs and slave-girls in attendance
upon him and at his head, whereat he laughed at himself and said,
"By Allah, it is not as I were on wake, and [yet] I am not
asleep!" Then he arose and sat up, whilst the damsels laughed at
him and hid [their laughter] from him; and he was confounded in
his wit and bit upon his finger. The bite hurt him and he cried
"Oh!" and was vexed; and the Khalif watched him, whence he saw
him not, and laughed.
Presently Aboulhusn turned to a damsel and called to her;
whereupon she came to him and he said to her, "By the protection
of God, O damsel, am I Commander of the Faithful?" "Yes, indeed,"
answered she; "by the protection of God thou in this time art
Commander of the Faithful." Quoth he, "By Allah, thou liest, O
thousandfold strumpet!" Then he turned to the chief eunuch and
called to him, whereupon he came to him and kissing the earth
before him, said, "Yes, O Commander of the Faithful." "Who is
Commander of the Faithful?" asked Aboulhusn. "Thou," replied the
eunuch and Aboulhusn said, "Thou liest, thousandfold catamite
that thou art!" Then he turned to another eunuch and said to him,
"O my chief,[FN#20] by the protection of God, am I Commander of
the Faithful?" "Ay, by Allah, O my lord!" answered he. "Thou in
this time art Commander of the Faithful and Vicar of the Lord of
the Worlds." Aboulhusn laughed at himself and misdoubted of his
reason and was perplexed at what he saw and said, "In one night I
am become Khalif! Yesterday I was Aboulhusn the Wag, and to-day I
am Commander of the Faithful." Then the chief eunuch came up to
him and said, "O Commander of the Faithful, (the name of God
encompass thee!) thou art indeed Commander of the Faithful and
Vicar of the Lord of the Worlds!" And the slave-girls and eunuchs
came round about him, till he arose and abode wondering at his
case.
Presently, one of the slave-girls brought him a pair of sandals
wrought with raw silk and green silk and embroidered with red
gold, and he took them and put them in his sleeve, whereat the
slave cried out and said, "Allah! Allah! O my lord, these are
sandals for the treading of thy feet, so thou mayst enter the
draught-house." Aboulhusn was confounded and shaking the sandals
from his sleeve, put them on his feet, whilst the Khalif
[well-nigh] died of laughter at him. The slave forewent him to
the house of easance, where he entered and doing his occasion,
came out into the chamber, whereupon the slave- girls brought him
a basin of gold and an ewer of silver and poured water on his
hands and he made the ablution.
Then they spread him a prayer-carpet and he prayed. Now he knew
not how to pray and gave not over bowing and prostrating himself,
[till he had prayed the prayers] of twenty inclinations,[FN#21]
pondering in himself the while and saying, "By Allah, I am none
other than the Commander of the Faithful in very sooth! This is
assuredly no dream, for all these things happen not in a dream."
And he was convinced and determined in himself that he was
Commander of the Faithful; so he pronounced the Salutation[FN#22]
and made an end[FN#23] of his prayers; whereupon the slaves and
slave-girls came round about him with parcels of silk and
stuffs[FN#24] and clad him in the habit of the Khalifate and gave
him the royal dagger in his hand. Then the chief eunuch went out
before him and the little white slaves behind him, and they
ceased not [going] till they raised the curtain and brought him
into the hall of judgment and the throne-room of the Khalifate.
There he saw the curtains and the forty doors and El Ijli and Er
Recashi[FN#25] and Ibdan and Jedim and Abou Ishac [FN#26] the
boon-companions and beheld swords drawn and lions [FN#27]
encompassing [the throne] and gilded glaives and death-dealing
bows and Persians and Arabs and Turks and Medes and folk and
peoples and Amirs and viziers and captains and grandees and
officers of state and men of war, and indeed there appeared the
puissance of the house of Abbas [FN#28] and the majesty of the
family of the Prophet.
So he sat down upon the throne of the Khalifate and laid the
dagger in his lap, whereupon all [present] came up to kiss the
earth before him and called down on him length of life and
continuance [of glory and prosperity]. Then came forward Jaafer
the Barmecide and kissing the earth, said, "May the wide world of
God be the treading of thy feet and may Paradise be thy
dwelling-place and the fire the habitation of thine enemies! May
no neighbour transgress against thee nor the lights of fire die
out for thee, [FN#29] O Khalif of [all] cities and ruler of [all]
countries!"
Therewithal Aboulhusn cried out at him and said, "O dog of the
sons of Bermek, go down forthright, thou and the master of the
police of the city, to such a place in such a street and deliver
a hundred dinars to the mother of Aboulhusn the Wag and bear her
my salutation. [Then, go to such a mosque] and take the four
sheikhs and the Imam and beat each of them with four hundred
lashes and mount them on beasts, face to tail, and go round with
them about all the city and banish them to a place other than the
city; and bid the crier make proclamation before them, saying,
'This is the reward and the least of the reward of whoso
multiplieth words and molesteth his neighbours and stinteth them
of their delights and their eating and drinking!'" Jaafer
received the order [with submission] and answered with
["Hearkening and] obedience;" after which he went down from
before Aboulhusn to the city and did that whereunto he had bidden
him.
Meanwhile, Aboulhusn abode in the Khalifate, taking and giving,
ordering and forbidding and giving effect to his word, till the
end of the day, when he gave [those who were present] leave and
permission [to withdraw], and the Amirs and officers of state
departed to their occasions. Then the eunuchs came to him and
calling down on him length of life and continuance [of glory and
prosperity], walked in attendance upon him and raised the
curtain, and he entered the pavilion of the harem, where he found
candles lighted and lamps burning and singing-women smiting [on
instruments of music]. When he saw this, he was confounded in his
wit and said in himself, "By Allah, I am in truth Commander of
the Faithful!" As soon as he appeared, the slave-girls rose to
him and carrying him up on to the estrade,[FN#30] brought him a
great table, spread with the richest meats. So he ate thereof
with all his might, till he had gotten his fill, when he called
one of the slave-girls and said to her, "What is thy name?" "My
name is Miskeh," replied she, and he said to another, "What is
thy name?" Quoth she, "My name is Terkeh." Then said he to a
third, "What is thy name?" "My name is Tuhfeh," answered she; and
he went on to question the damsels of their names, one after
another, [till he had made the round of them all], when he rose
from that place and removed to the wine-chamber.
He found it every way complete and saw therein ten great trays,
full of all fruits and cakes and all manner sweetmeats. So he sat
down and ate thereof after the measure of his sufficiency, and
finding there three troops of singing-girls, was amazed and made
the girls eat. Then he sat and the singers also seated
themselves, whilst the black slaves and the white slaves and the
eunuchs and pages and boys stood, and the slave-girls, some of
them, sat and some stood. The damsels sang and warbled all manner
melodies and the place answered them for the sweetness of the
songs, whilst the pipes cried out and the lutes made accord with
them, till it seemed to Aboulhusn that he was in Paradise and his
heart was cheered and his breast dilated. So he sported and
joyance waxed on him and he bestowed dresses of honour on the
damsels and gave and bestowed, challenging this one and kissing
that and toying with a third, plying one with wine and another
with meat, till the night fell down.
All this while the Khalif was diverting himself with watching him
and laughing, and at nightfall he bade one of the slave-girls
drop a piece of henbane in the cup and give it to Aboulhusn to
drink. So she did as he bade her and gave Aboulhusn the cup,
whereof no sooner had he drunken than his head forewent his feet
[and he fell down, senseless]. Therewith the Khalif came forth
from behind the curtain, laughing, and calling to the servant who
had brought Aboulhusn to the palace, said to him, "Carry this
fellow to his own place." So Mesrour took him up [and carrying
him to his own house], set him down in the saloon. Then he went
forth from him and shutting the saloon-door upon him, returned to
the Khalif, who slept till the morrow.
As for Aboulhusn, he gave not over sleeping till God the Most
High brought on the morning, when he awoke, crying out and
saying, "Ho, Tuffaheh! Ho, Rahet el Culoub! Ho, Miskeh! Ho,
Tuhfeh!" And he gave not over calling upon the slave-girls till
his mother heard him calling upon strange damsels and rising,
came to him and said, "The name of God encompass thee! Arise, O
my son, O Aboulhusn! Thou dreamest." So he opened his eyes and
finding an old woman at his head, raised his eyes and said to
her, "Who art thou?" Quoth she, "I am thy mother;" and he
answered, "Thou liest! I am the Commander of the Faithful, the
Vicar of God." Whereupon his mother cried out and said to him,
"God preserve thy reason! Be silent, O my son, and cause not the
loss of our lives and the spoiling of thy wealth, [as will
assuredly betide,] if any hear this talk and carry it to the
Khalif."
So he rose from his sleep and finding himself in his own saloon
and his mother by him, misdoubted of his wit and said to her, "By
Allah, O my mother, I saw myself in a dream in a palace, with
slave-girls and servants about me and in attendance upon me, and
I sat upon the throne of the Khalifate and ruled. By Allah, O my
mother, this is what I saw, and verily it was not a dream!" Then
he bethought himself awhile and said, "Assuredly, I am Aboulhusn
el Khelia, and this that I saw was only a dream, and [it was in a
dream that] I was made Khalif and commanded and forbade." Then he
bethought himself again and said, "Nay, but it was no dream and I
am no other than the Khalif, and indeed I gave gifts and bestowed
dresses of honour." Quoth his mother to him, "O my son, thou
sportest with thy reason: thou wilt go to the hospital and become
a gazing-stock. Indeed, that which thou hast seen is only from
the Devil and it was a delusion of dreams, for whiles Satan
sporteth with men's wits in all manner ways."
Then said she to him, "O my son, was there any one with thee
yesternight?" And he bethought himself and said, "Yes; one lay
the night with me and I acquainted him with my case and told him
my story. Doubtless, he was from the Devil, and I, O my mother,
even as thou sayst truly, am Aboulhusn el Khelia." "O my son,"
rejoined she, "rejoice in tidings of all good, for yesterday's
record is that there came the Vivier Jaafer the Barmecide [and
his company] and beat the sheikhs of the mosque and the Imam,
each four hundred lashes; after which they paraded them about the
city, making proclamation before them and saying, 'This is the
reward and the least of the reward of whoso lacketh of goodwill
to his neighbours and troubleth on them their lives!' and
banished them from Baghdad. Moreover, the Khalif sent me a
hundred dinars and sent to salute me." Whereupon Aboulhusn cried
out and said to her, "O old woman of ill-omen, wilt thou
contradict me and tell me that I am not the Commander of the
Faithful? It was I who commanded Jaafer the Barmecide to beat the
sheikhs and parade them about the city and make proclamation
before them and who sent thee the hundred dinars and sent to
salute thee, and I, O beldam of ill-luck, am in very deed the
Commander of the Faithful, and thou art a liar, who would make me
out a dotard."
So saying, he fell upon her and beat her with a staff of
almond-wood, till she cried out, "[Help], O Muslims!" and he
redoubled the beating upon her, till the folk heard her cries and
coming to her, [found] Aboulhusn beating her and saying to her,
"O old woman of ill-omen, am I not the Commander of the Faithful?
Thou hast enchanted me!" When the folk heard his words, they
said, "This man raveth," and doubted not of his madness. So they
came in upon him and seizing him, pinioned him and carried him to
the hospital. Quoth the superintendant, "What aileth this youth?"
And they said, "This is a madman." "By Allah," cried Aboulhusn,
"they lie against me! I am no madman, but the Commander of the
Faithful." And the superintendant answered him, saying, "None
lieth but thou, O unluckiest of madmen!"
Then he stripped him of his clothes and clapping on his neck a
heavy chain, bound him to a high lattice and fell to drubbing him
two bouts a day and two anights; and on this wise he abode the
space of ten days. Then his mother came to him and said, "O my
son, O Aboulhusn, return to thy reason, for this is the Devil's
doing." Quoth he, "Thou sayst sooth, O my mother, and bear thou
witness of me that I repent [and forswear] that talk and turn
from my madness. So do thou deliver me, for I am nigh upon
death." So his mother went out to the superintendant and procured
his release and he returned to his own house.
Now this was at the beginning of the month, and when it was the
end thereof, Aboulhusn longed to drink wine and returning to his
former usance, furnished his saloon and made ready food and let
bring wine; then, going forth to the bridge, he sat there,
expecting one whom he should carouse withal, as of his wont. As
he sat thus, behold, up came the Khalif [and Mesrour] to him; but
Aboulhusn saluted them not and said to them, "No welcome and no
greeting to the perverters![FN#31] Ye are no other than devils."
However, the Khalif accosted him and said to him, "O my brother,
did I not say to thee that I would return to thee?" Quoth
Aboulhusn, "I have no need of thee; and as the byword says in
verse:
'Twere fitter and better my loves that I leave, For, if the eye
see not, the heart will not grieve.
And indeed, O my brother, the night thou camest to me and we
caroused together, I and thou, it was as if the Devil came to me
and troubled me that night." "And who is he, the Devil?" asked
the Khalif. "He is none other than thou," answered Aboulhusn;
whereat the Khalif smiled and sitting down by him, coaxed him and
spoke him fair, saying, "O my brother, when I went out from thee,
I forgot [to shut] the door [and left it] open, and belike Satan
came in to thee." Quoth Aboulhusn, "Ask me not of that which hath
betided me. What possessed thee to leave the door open, so that
the Devil came in to me and there befell me with him this and
that?" And he related to him all that had befallen him, from
first to last, aud there is no advantage in the repetition of it;
what while the Khalif laughed and hid his laughter.
Then said he to Aboulhusn, "Praised be God who hath done away
from thee that which irked thee and that I see thee in weal!" And
Aboulhusn said, "Never again will I take thee to boon-companion
or sitting-mate; for the byword saith, 'Whoso stumbleth on a
stone and returneth thereto, blame and reproach be upon him.' And
thou, O my brother, nevermore will I entertain thee nor use
companionship with thee, for that I have not found thy commerce
propitious to me."[FN#32] But the Khalif blandished him and
conjured him, redoubling words upon him with "Verily, I am thy
guest; reject not the guest," till Aboulhusn took him and
[carrying him home], brought him into the saloon and set food
before him and friendly entreated him in speech. Then he told him
all that had befallen him, whilst the Khalif was like to die of
hidden laughter; after which Aboulhusn removed the tray of food
and bringing the wine-tray, filled a cup and emptied it out three
times, then gave it to the Khalif, saying, "O boon-companion
mine, I am thy slave and let not that which I am about to say irk
thee, and be thou not vexed, neither do thou vex me." And he
recited these verses:
No good's in life (to the counsel list of one who's
purpose-whole,) An if thou be not drunken still and gladden
not thy soul.
Ay, ne'er will I leave to drink of wine, what while the night on
me Darkens, till drowsiness bow down my head upon my bowl.
In wine, as the glittering sunbeams bright, my heart's
contentment is, That banishes hence, with various joys, all
kinds of care and dole.
When the Khalif heard these his verses, he was moved to exceeding
delight and taking the cup, drank it off, and they ceased not to
drink and carouse till the wine rose to their heads. Then said
Aboulhusn to the Khalif, "O boon-companion mine, of a truth I am
perplexed concerning my affair, for meseemed I was Commander of
the Faithful and ruled and gave gifts and largesse, and in very
deed, O my brother, it was not a dream." "These were the
delusions of sleep," answered the Khalif and crumbling a piece of
henbane into the cup, said to him, "By my life, do thou drink
this cup." And Aboulhusn said, "Surely I will drink it from thy
hand." Then he took the cup from the Khalifs hand and drank it
off, and no sooner had it settled in his belly than his head
forewent his feet [and he fell down senseless].
Now his parts and fashions pleased the Khalif and the excellence
of his composition and his frankness, and he said in himself, "I
will assuredly make him my cup- companion and sitting-mate." So
he rose forthright and saying to Mesrour, "Take him up,"
[returned to the palace]. Accordingly, Mesrour took up Aboulhusn
and carrying him to the palace of the Khalifate, set him down
before Er Reshid, who bade the slaves and slave- girls encompass
him about, whilst he himself hid in a place where Aboulhusn could
not see him.
Then he commanded one of the slave-girls to take the lute and
strike it at Aboulhusn's head, whilst the rest smote upon their
instruments. [So they played and sang,] till Aboulhusn awoke at
the last of the night and heard the noise of lutes and tabrets
and the sound of the pipes and the singing of the slave-girls,
whereupon he opened his eyes and finding himself in the palace,
with the slave-girls and eunuchs about him, exclaimed, 'There is
no power and no virtue but in God the Most High, the Supreme!
Verily, I am fearful of the hospital and of that which I suffered
therein aforetime, and I doubt not but the Devil is come to me
again, as before. O my God, put thou Satan to shame!" Then he
shut his eyes and laid his head in his sleeve and fell to
laughing softly and raising his head [bytimes], but [still] found
the apartment lighted and the girls singing.
Presently, one of the eunuchs sat down at his head and said to
him, "Sit up, O Commander of the Faithful, and look on thy palace
and thy slave-girls." Quoth Aboulhusn, "By the protection of God,
am I in truth Commander of the Faithful and dost thou not lie?
Yesterday, I went not forth neither ruled, but drank and slept,
and this eunuch cometh to rouse me up." Then he sat up and
bethought himself of that which had betided him with his mother
and how he had beaten her and entered the hospital, and he saw
the marks of the beating, wherewithal the superintendant of the
hospital had beaten him, and was perplexed concerning his affair
and pondered in himself, saying, "By Allah, I know not how my
case is nor what is this that betideth me!"
Then he turned to a damsel of the damsels and said to her, "Who
am I?" Quoth she, "Thou art the Commander of the Faithful;" and
he said, "Thou liest, O calamity![FN#33] If I be indeed the
Commander of the Faithful, bite my finger." So she came to him
and bit it with her might, and he said to her, "It sufficeth."
Then he said to the chief eunuch, "Who am I?" And he answered,
"Thou art the Commander of the Faithful." So he left him and
turning to a little white slave, said to him, "Bite my ear;" and
he bent down to him and put his ear to his mouth. Now the slave
was young and lacked understanding; so he closed his teeth upon
Aboulhusn's ear with his might, till he came near to sever it;
and he knew not Arabic, so, as often as Aboulhusn said to him,
"It sufficeth," he concluded that he said, "Bite harder," and
redoubled his bite and clenched his teeth upon the ear, whilst
the damsels were diverted from him with hearkening to the
singing-girls, and Aboulhusn cried out for succour from the boy
and the Khalif [well-nigh] lost his senses for laughter.
Then he dealt the boy a cuff and he let go his ear, whereupon
Aboulhusn put off his clothes and abode naked, with his yard and
his arse exposed, and danced among the slave-girls. They bound
his hands and he wantoned among them, what while they [well-nigh]
died of laughing at him and the Khalif swooned away for excess of
laughter. Then he came to himself and going forth to Aboulhusn,
said to him, "Out on thee, O Aboulhusn! Thou slayest me with
laughter." So he turned to him and knowing him, said to him, "By
Allah, it is thou slayest me and slayest my mother and slewest
the sheikhs and the Imam of the Mosque!"
Then the Khalif took him into his especial favour and married him
and bestowed largesse on him and lodged him with himself in the
palace and made him of the chief of his boon-companions, and
indeed he was preferred with him above them and the Khalif
advanced him over them all. Now they were ten in number, to wit,
El Ijli and Er Recashi and Ibdan and Hassan el Feresdec and El
Lauz and Es Seker and Omar et Tertis and Abou Nuwas[FN#34] and
Abou Ishac en Nedim and Aboulhusn el Khelia, and by each of them
hangeth a story that is told in other than this book. And indeed
Aboulhusn became high in honour with the Khalif and favoured
above all, so that he sat with him and the Lady Zubeideh bint el
Casim and married the latter's treasuress, whose name was Nuzhet
el Fuad.
Aboulhusn abode with his wife in eating and drinking and all
delight of life, till all that was with them was spent, when he
said to her, "Harkye, O Nuzhet el Fuad!" "At thy service,"
answered she, and he said, "I have it in mind to play a trick on
the Khalif and thou shalt do the like with the Lady Zubeideh, and
we will take of them, in a twinkling, two hundred dinars and two
pieces of silk." "As thou wilt," answered she; "but what thinkest
thou to do?" And he said,"We will feign ourselves dead and this
is the trick. I will die before thee and lay myself out, and do
thou spread over me a kerchief of silk and loose [the muslin of]
my turban over me and tie my toes and lay on my heart a knife,
and a little salt.[FN#35] Then let down thy hair and betake
thyself to thy mistress Zubeideh, tearing thy dress and buffeting
thy face and crying out. She will say to thee, 'What aileth
thee?' and do thou answer her, saying, 'May thy head outlive
Aboulhusn el Khelia! For he is dead." She will mourn for me and
weep and bid her treasuress give thee a hundred dinars and a
piece of silk and will say to thee, 'Go lay him out and carry him
forth [to burial].' So do thou take of her the hundred dinars and
the piece of silk and come back, and when thou returnest to me, I
will rise up and thou shalt lie down in my place, and I will go
to the Khalif and say to him, 'May thy head outlive Nuzhet el
Fuad!' and tear my dress and pluck at my beard. He will mourn for
thee and say to his treasurer, 'Give Aboulhusn a hundred dinars
and a piece of silk.' Then he will say to me, 'Go; lay her out
and carry her forth;' and I will come back to thee."
Therewith Nuzhet el Fuad rejoiced and said, "Indeed, this is an
excellent device." [Then Aboulhusn stretched himself out]
forthright and she shut his eyes and tied his feet and covered
him with the kerchief and did what [else] her lord had bidden
her; after which she rent her dress and uncovering her head, let
down her hair and went in to the Lady Zubeideh, crying out and
weeping, When the princess saw her in this case, she said to her,
"What plight is this [in which I see thee]? What is thy story and
what maketh thee weep?" And Nuzhet el Fuad answered, weeping and
crying out the while, "O my lady, may thy head live and mayst
thou survive Aboulhusn el Khelia! For he is dead." The Lady
Zubeideh mourned for him and said, "Alas for Aboulhusn el
Khelia!" And she wept for him awhile. Then she bade her
treasuress give Nuzhet el Fuad a hundred dinars and a piece of
silk and said to her, "O Nuzhet el Fuad, go, lay him out and
carry him forth."
So she took the hundred dinars and the piece of silk and returned
to her dwelling, rejoicing, and went in to Aboulhusn and told him
what had befallen, whereupon he arose and rejoiced and girt his
middle and danced and took the hundred dinars and the piece of
silk and laid them up. Then he laid out Nuzhet el Fuad and did
with her even as she had done with him; after which he rent his
clothes and plucked out his beard and disordered his turban [and
went forth] and gave not over running till he came in to the
Khalif, who was sitting in the hall of audience, and he in this
plight, beating upon his breast. Quoth the Khalif to him, "What
aileth thee, O Aboulhusn!" And he wept and said, "Would thy
boon-companion had never been and would his hour had never come!"
"Tell me [thy case,]" said the Khalif; and Aboulhusn said, "O my
lord, may thy head outlive Nuzhet el Fuad!" Quoth the Khalif,
"There is no god but God!" And he smote hand upon hand. Then he
comforted Aboulhusn and said to him, "Grieve not, for we will
give thee a concubine other than she." And he bade the treasurer
give him a hundred dinars and a piece of silk. So the treasurer
gave him what the Khalif bade him, and the latter said to
him,"Go, lay her out and carry her forth and make her a handsome
funeral." So Aboulhusn took that which he had given him and
returning to his house, rejoicing, went in to Nuzhet el Fuad and
said to her, "Arise, for the wish is accomplished unto us." So
she arose and he laid before her the hundred dinars and the piece
of silk, whereat she rejoiced, and they added the gold to the
gold and the silk to the silk and sat talking and laughing at one
another.
Meanwhile, when Aboulhusn went out from the presence of the
Khalif and went to lay out Nuzhet el Fuad, the prince mourned for
her and dismissing the divan, arose and betook himself, leaning
upon Mesrour, the swordsman of his vengeance, [to the pavilion of
the harem, where he went in] to the Lady Zubeideh, that he might
condole with her for her slave-girl. He found the princess
sitting weeping and awaiting his coming, so she might condole
with him for [his boon-companion] Aboulhusn el Khelia. So he said
to her, "May thy head outlive thy slave-girl Nuzhet el Fuad!" And
she answered, saying, "O my lord, God preserve my slave-girl!
Mayst thou live and long survive thy boon-companion Aboulhusn el
Khelia! For he is dead."
The Khalif smiled and said to his eunuch, "O Mesrour, verily
women are little of wit. I conjure thee, by Allah, say, was not
Aboulhusn with me but now?" ["Yes, O Commander of the Faithful,"
answered Mesrour] Quoth the Lady Zubeideh, laughing from a heart
full of wrath, "Wilt thou not leave thy jesting? Is it not enough
that Aboulhusn is dead, but thou must kill my slave-girl also and
bereave us of the two and style me little of wit?" "Indeed,"
answered the Khalif, "it is Nuzhet el Fuad who is dead." And
Zubeideh said, "Indeed he hath not been with thee, nor hast thou
seen him, and none was with me but now but Nuzhet el Fuad, and
she sorrowful, weeping, with her clothes torn. I exhorted her to
patience and gave her a hundred dinars and a piece of silk; and
indeed I was awaiting thy coming, so I might condole with thee
for thy boon- companion Aboulhusn el Khelia, and was about to
send for thee." The Khalif laughed and said, "None is dead but
Nuzhet el Fuad;" and she, "No, no, my lord; none is dead but
Aboulhusn."
With this the Khalif waxed wroth, and the Hashimi vein[FN#36]
started out from between his eyes and he cried out to Mesrour and
said to him, "Go forth and see which of them is dead." So Mesrour
went out, running, and the Khalif said to Zubeideh, "Wilt thou
lay me a wager?" "Yes," answered she; "I will wager, and I say
that Aboulhusn is dead." "And I," rejoined the Khalif, "wager and
say that none is dead save Nuzhet el Fuad; and the stake shall be
the Garden of Pleasance against thy palace and the Pavilion of
Pictures." So they [agreed upon this and] abode awaiting Mesrour,
till such time as he should return with news.
As for Mesrour, he gave not over running till he came to the
by-street, [wherein was the house] of Aboulhusn el Khelia. Now
the latter was sitting reclining at the lattice, and chancing to
look round, saw Mesrour running along the street and said to
Nuzhet el Fuad, "Meseemeth the Khalif, when I went forth from
him, dismissed the Divan and went in to the Lady Zubeideh, to
condole with her [for thee;] whereupon she arose and condoled
with him [for me,] saying, 'God greaten thy recompence for [the
loss of] Aboulhusn el Khelia!' And he said to her, 'None is dead
save Nuzhet el Fuad, may thy head outlive her!' Quoth she, 'It is
not she who is dead, but Aboulhusn el Khelia, thy
boon-companion.' And he to her, 'None is dead but Nuzhet el
Fuad.' And they gainsaid one another, till the Khalif waxed wroth
and they laid a wager, and he hath sent Mesrour the sword- bearer
to see who is dead. Wherefore it were best that thou lie down, so
he may see thee and go and acquaint the Khalif and confirm my
saying." So Nuzhet el Fuad stretched herself out and Aboulhusn
covered her with her veil and sat at her head, weeping.
Presently, in came Mesrour the eunuch to him and saluted him and
seeing Nuzhet el Fuad stretched out, uncovered her face and said,
"There is no god but God! Our sister Nuzhet el Fuad is dead. How
sudden was the [stroke of] destiny! May God have mercy on thee
and acquit thee of responsibility!" Then he returned and related
what had passed before the Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh, and he
laughing. "O accursed one,' said the Khalif, "is this a time for
laughter? Tell us which is dead of them." "By Allah, O my lord,"
answered Mesrour, "Aboulhusn is well and none is dead but Nuzhet
el Fuad." Quoth the Khalif to Zubeideh, "Thou hast lost thy
pavilion in thy play," and he laughed at her and said to Mesrour,
"O Mesrour, tell her what thou sawest." "Verily, O my lady," said
the eunuch, "I ran without ceasing till I came in to Aboulhusn in
his house and found Nuzhet el Fuad lying dead and Aboulhusn
sitting at her head, weeping. I saluted him and condoled with him
and sat down by his side and uncovered the face of Nuzhet el Fuad
and saw her dead and her face swollen. So I said to him, 'Carry
her out forthright [to burial], so we may pray over her.' He
answered, 'It is well;' and I left him to lay her out and came
hither, that I might tell you the news."
The Khalif laughed and said, "Tell it again and again to thy lady
lack-wit." When the Lady Zubeideh heard Mesrour's words [and
those of the Khalif,] she was wroth and said, "None lacketh wit
but he who believeth a black slave." And she reviled Mesrour,
whilst the Khalif laughed. Mesrour was vexed at this and said to
the Khalif, "He spoke sooth who said, 'Women lack wit and
religion.'" Then said the Lady Zubeideh to the Khalif, "O
Commander of the Faithful, thou sportest and jestest with me, and
this slave hoodwinketh me, to please thee; but I will send and
see which is dead of them." And he answered, saying, "Send one
who shall see which is dead of them." So the Lady Zubeideh cried
out to an old woman, a stewardess, and said to her, "Go to the
house of Nuzhet el Fuad in haste and see who is dead and loiter
not." And she railed at her.
The old woman went out, running, whilst the Khalif and Mesrour
laughed, and gave not over running till she came into the street.
Aboulhusn saw her and knowing her, said to his wife, "O Nuzhet el
Fuad, meseemeth the Lady Zubeideh hath sent to us to see who is
dead and hath not given credence to Mesrour's report of thy
death; so she hath despatched the old woman, her stewardess, to
discover the truth; wherefore it behoveth me to be dead in my
turn, for the sake of thy credit with the Lady Zubeideh."
Accordingly, he lay down and stretched himself out, and she
covered him and bound his eyes and feet and sat at his head,
weeping.
Presently, the old woman came in to her and saw her sitting at
Aboulhusn's head, weeping and lamenting; and when she saw the old
woman, she cried out and said to her, "See what hath betided me!
Indeed, Aboulhusn is dead and hath left me alone and forlorn!"
Then she cried out and tore her clothes and said to the old
woman, "O my mother, how good he was!" Quoth the other, "Indeed
thou art excused, for thou wast used to him and he to thee." Then
she considered what Mesrour had reported to the Khalif and the
Lady Zubeideh and said to her, "Indeed, Mesrour goeth about to
sow discord between the Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh." "And what
is the [cause of] discord, O my mother?" asked Nuzhet el Fuad. "O
my daughter," answered the old woman, "Mesrour came to the Khalif
and the Lady Zubeideh and gave them news of thee that thou wast
dead and that Aboulhusn was well. "And Nuzhet el Fuad said to
her, "O my aunt, I was with my lady but now and she gave me a
hundred dinars and a piece of silk; and now see my condition and
that which hath befallen me! Indeed, I am bewildered, and how
shall I do, and I alone, forlorn? Would God I had died and he had
lived!"
Then she wept and the old woman with her and the latter went up
to Aboulhusn and uncovering his face, saw his eyes bound and
swollen for the binding. So she covered him again and said,
"Indeed, O Nuzhet el Fuad, thou art afflicted in Aboulhusn!" Then
she condoled with her and going out from her, ran without ceasing
till she came in to the Lady Zubeideh and related to her the
story; and the princess said to her, laughing, "Tell it over
again to the Khalif, who maketh me out scant of wit and lacking
of religion, and to this ill-omened slave, who presumeth to
contradict me." Quoth Mesrour, "This old woman lieth; for I saw
Aboulhusn well and Nuzhet el Fuad it was who lay dead." "It is
thou that liest," rejoined the stewardess, "and wouldst fain sow
discord between the Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh." And he said,
"None lieth but thou, O old woman of ill-omen, and thy lady
believeth thee, and she doteth." Whereupon the Lady Zubeideh
cried out at him, and indeed she was enraged at him and at his
speech and wept.
Then said the Khalif to her, "I lie and my eunuch lieth, and thou
liest and thy waiting-woman lieth; so methinks we were best go,
all four of us together, that we may see which of us telleth the
truth." Quoth Mesrour, "Come, let us go, that I may put this
ill-omened old woman to shame[FN#37] and deal her a sound
drubbing for her lying." And she answered him, saying, "O dotard,
is thy wit like unto my wit? Indeed, thy wit is as the hen's
wit." Mesrour was incensed at her words and would have laid
violent hands on her, but the Lady Zubeideh warded him off from
her and said to him, "Her sooth-fastness will presently be
distinguished from thy sooth-fastness and her leasing from thy
leasing."
Then they all four arose, laying wagers with one another, and
went forth, walking, from the palace-gate [and fared on] till
they came in at the gate of the street in which Aboulhusn el
Khelia dwelt. He saw them and said to his wife Nuzhet el Fuad,
"Verily, all that is sticky is not a pancake and not every time
cometh the jar off safe.[FN#38]' Meseemeth the old woman hath
gone and told her lady and acquainted her with our case and she
hath disputed with Mesrour the eunuch and they have laid wagers
with one another about our death and are come to us, all four,
the Khalif and the eunuch and the Lady Zubeideh and the old
woman." When Nuzhet el Fuad heard this, she started up from her
lying posture and said, "How shall we do?" And he said, "We will
both feign ourselves dead and stretch ourselves out and hold our
breath." So she hearkened unto him and they both lay down on the
siesta[-carpet] and bound their feet and shut their eyes and
covered themselves with the veil and held their breath.
Presently, up came the Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh and Mesrour
and the old woman and entering, found Aboulhusn and his wife both
stretched out [apparently] dead; which when the Lady Zubeideh
saw, she wept and said, "They ceased not to bring [ill] news of
my slave- girl, till she died; methinketh Aboulhusn's death was
grievous to her and that she died after him."[FN#39]. Quoth the
Khalif, "Thou shalt not forestall me with talk and prate. She
certainly died before Aboulhusn, for he came to me with his
clothes torn and his beard plucked out, beating his breast with
two bricks, and I gave him a hundred dinars and a piece of silk
and said to him, 'Go, carry her forth [and bury her] and I will
give thee a concubine other than she and handsomer, and she shall
be in stead of her.' But it would appear that her death was no
light matter to him and he died after her;[FN#40] so it is I who
have beaten thee and gotten thy stake."
The Lady Zubeideh answered him many words and the talk waxed
amain between them. At last the Khalif sat down at the heads of
the pair and said, "By the tomb of the Apostle of God (may He
bless and preserve him!) and the sepulchres of my fathers and
forefathers, whoso will tell me which of them died before the
other, I will willingly give him a thousand dinars!" When
Aboulhusn heard the Khalifs words, he sprang up in haste and
said, "I died first, O Commander of the Faithful! Hand over the
thousand dinars and quit thine oath and the conjuration by which
thou sworest." Then Nuzhet el Fuad rose also and stood up before
the Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh, who both rejoiced in this and
in their safety, and the princess chid her slave-girl. Then the
Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh gave them joy at their well-being
and knew that this [pretended] death was a device to get the
money; and the princess said to Nuzhet el Fuad, "Thou shouldst
have sought of me that which thou desiredst, without this
fashion, and not have consumed my heart for thee." And she said,
"Indeed, I was ashamed, O my lady."
As for the Khalif, he swooned away for laughing and said, "O
Aboulhusn, thou wilt never cease to be a wag and do rarities and
oddities!" Quoth he, "O Commander of the Faithful, I played off
this trick, for that the money was exhausted, which thou gavest
me, and I was ashamed to ask of thee again. When I was single, I
could never keep money; but since thou marriedst me to this
damsel here, if I possessed thy wealth, I should make an end of
it. So, when all that was in my hand was spent, I wrought this
trick, so I might get of thee the hundred dinars and the piece of
silk; and all this is an alms from our lord. But now make haste
to give me the thousand dinars and quit thee of thine oath."
The Khalif and the Lady Zubeideh laughed and returned to the
palace; and he gave Aboulhusn the thousand dinars, saying, "Take
them as a thank-offering for thy preservation from death," whilst
the princess did the like with Nuzhet el Fuad. Moreover, the
Khalif increased Aboulhusn in his stipends and allowances, and he
[and his wife] ceased not [to live] in joy and contentment, till
there came to them the Destroyer of Delights and Sunderer of
Companies, he who layeth waste the palaces and peopleth the
tombs.
THE KHALIF OMAR BEN ABDULAZIZ AND THE
POETS.[FN#41]
It is said that, when the Khalifate devolved on Omar ben
Abdulaziz[FN#42] (of whom God accept), the poets [of the time]
resorted to him, as they had been used to resort to the Khalifs
before him, and abode at his door days and days, but he gave them
not leave to enter, till there came to Omar Adi ben Artah,[FN#43]
who stood high in esteem with him. Jerir[FN#44] accosted him and
begged him to crave admission for them [to the Khalif]. "It is
well," answered Adi and going in to Omar, said to him, "The poets
are at thy door and have been there days and days; yet hast thou
not given them leave to enter, albeit their sayings are
abiding[FN#45] and their arrows go straight to the mark." Quoth
Omar, "What have I to do with the poets?" And Adi answered,
saying, "O Commander of the Faithful, the Prophet (whom God bless
and preserve) was praised [by a poet] and gave [him largesse,]
and therein[FN#46] is an exemplar to every Muslim." Quoth Omar,
"And who praised him?" "Abbas ben Mirdas[FN#47] praised him,"
replied Adi, "and he clad him with a suit and said, 'O
Bilal,[FN#48] cut off from me his tongue!'" "Dost thou remember
what he said?" asked the Khalif; and Adi said, "Yes." "Then
repeat it," rejoined Omar. So Adi recited the following verses:
I saw thee, O thou best of all the human race, display A book
that came to teach the Truth to those in error's way.
Thou madest known to us therein the road of righteousness, When
we had wandered from the Truth, what while in gloom it lay.
A dark affair thou littest up with Islam and with proof
Quenchedst the flaming red-coals of error and dismay.
Mohammed, then, I do confess, God's chosen prophet is, And every
man requited is for that which he doth say.
The road of right thou hast made straight, that erst was crooked
grown; Yea, for its path of old had fall'n to ruin and
decay.
Exalted mayst thou be above th' empyrean heaven of joy And may
God's glory greater grow and more exalted aye!
"And indeed," continued Adi, "this ode on the Prophet (may God
bless and keep him!) is well known and to comment it would be
tedious." Quoth Omar, "Who is at the door?" "Among them is Omar
ibn [Abi] Rebya the Cureishite,"[FN#49] answered Adi, and the
Khalif said, "May God show him no favour neither quicken him! Was
it not he who said ... ?" And he recited the following verses:
Would God upon that bitterest day, when my death calls for me,
What's 'twixt thine excrement and blood[FN#50] I still may
smell of thee!
Yea, so but Selma in the dust my bedfellow may prove, Fair fall
it thee! In heaven or hell I reck not if it be.
"Except," continued the Khalif, "he were the enemy of God, he had
wished for her in this world, so he might after [repent and]
return to righteous dealing. By Allah, he shall not come in to
me! Who is at the door other than he?" Quoth Adi, "Jemil ben
Mamer el Udhri[FN#51] is at the door;" and Omar said, "It is he
who says in one of his odes" ... [And he recited the following:]
Would we may live together and when we come to die, God grant the
death-sleep bring me within her tomb to lie!
For if "Her grave above her is levelled" it be said, Of life and
its continuance no jot indeed reck I.
"Away with him from me! Who is at the door?" "Kutheiyir
Azzeh,"[FN#52] replied Adi, and Omar said, "It is he who says in
one of his odes ... " [And he repeated the following verses:]
Some with religion themselves concern and make it their business
all; Sitting,[FN#53] they weep for the pains of hell and
still for mercy bawl!
If they could hearken to Azzeh's speech, as I, I hearken to it,
They straight would humble themselves to her and prone
before her fall.
"Leave the mention of him. Who is at the door?" Quoth Adi, "El
Akhwes el Ansari."[FN#54] "God the Most High put him away and
estrange him from His mercy!" cried Omar. "Is it not he who said,
berhyming on a man of Medina his slave-girl, so she might outlive
her master ... ?" [And he repeated the following line:]
God [judge] betwixt me and her lord! Away With her he flees me
and I follow aye.
"He shall not come in to me. Who is at the door, other than he?"
"Heman ben Ghalib el Ferezdec,"[FN#55] answered Adi; and Omar
said, "It is he who saith, glorying in adultery ..." [And he
repeated the following verses:]
The two girls let me down from fourscore fathoms' height, As
swoops a hawk, with wings all open in full flight;
And when my feet trod earth, "Art slain, that we should fear,"
Quoth they, "or live, that we may hope again thy sight?"
"He shall not come in to me. Who is at the door, other than he?"
"El Akhtel et Teghlibi,"[FN#56] answered Adi; and Omar said, "He
is the unbeliever who says in his verse ..." [And he repeated the
following:]
Ramazan in my life ne'er I fasted, nor e'er Have I eaten of
flesh, save in public[FN#57] it were.
No exhorter am I to abstain from the fair, Nor to love Mecca's
vale for my profit I care;
Nor, like others a little ere morning appear who bawl, "Come to
safety!"[FN#58] I stand up to prayer.
Nay, at daybreak I drink of the wind-freshened wine And prostrate
me[FN#59] instead in the dawn-whitened air.
"By Allah, he treadeth no carpet of mine! Who is at the door
other than he?" "Jerir ibn el Khetefa," answered Adi; and Omar
said, "It is he who saith ... " [And he recited as follows:]
But for the spying of the eyes [ill-omened,] we had seen Wild
cattle's eyes and antelopes' tresses of sable sheen.
The huntress of th' eyes[FN#60] by night came to me. "Turn in
peace," [Quoth I to her;] "This is no time for visiting, I
ween."
"If it must be and no help, admit Jerir." So Adi went forth and
admitted Jerir, who entered, saying:
He, who Mohammed sent, as prophet to mankind, Hath to a just
high-priest[FN#61] the Khalifate assigned.
His justice and his truth all creatures do embrace; The erring he
corrects and those of wandering mind.
I hope for present[FN#62] good [and bounty at thy hand,] For
souls of men are still to present[FN#63] good inclined.
Quoth Omar, "O Jerir, keep the fear of God before thine eyes and
say nought but the truth." And Jerir recited the following
verses:
How many, in Yemameh,[FN#64] dishevelled widows plain! How many a
weakling orphan unsuccoured doth remain,
For whom is thy departure even as a father's loss! To fly or
creep, like nestlings, alone, they strive in vain.
Now that the clouds have broken their promise to our hope, We
trust the Khalif's bounty will stand to us for rain.[FN#65]
When the Khalif heard this, he said, "By Allah, O Jerir, Omar
possesseth but a hundred dirhems."[FN#66] [And he cried out to
his servant, saying,] "Ho, boy! give them to him." Moreover, he
gave him the ornaments of his sword; and Jerir went forth to the
[other] poets, who said to him, "What is behind thee?"[FN#67] And
he answered, "A man who giveth to the poor and denieth the poets,
and I am well-pleased with him."[FN#68]