This has been a pleasantly serene quiet morning in the office, and
we have been sitting here tenderly educating ourself by studying the
catalogue of University Extension Courses given at Columbia. We may not
have admitted it before, but we are rather ambitious, and find a great
deal in this fasciculus that appeals to our necessities.
Among the courses we should like to enroll in, first we come to
_Business e163--Personnel methods for office executives_ (Fee $24).
This would be highly advantageous to us, to teach us how to get along
tactfully with office boys, proof-readers, leading editorial writers,
and sudden, unexpected telephone calls. We look somewhat wistfully
upon _Business e13--Advertising Display and Mechanics, and Business
e17--Salesmanship_. (“The student is given a grounding in the
principles of selling and practice in the presentation of a selling
proposition from its inception in the customer’s mind throughout its
development and final consummation as a sale.”) But the course for
us, austerely denying ourself the lectures on _Advanced Advertising
Writing_, is _Business e19-20--Sales promotion_ (Fee $24). This
“includes a thorough study of merchandising, direction of a sales
force, methods of breaking down sales resistance.” It specializes in
“dealer helps” and regards “consumer advertising” as only secondary. We
agree.
The Graduate Courses in Psychology of Advertising and Selling we feel
are probably too advanced for us.
So we pass eagerly on to literary topics. _English elf-2f_ has an
agreeably elvish sound--_Advanced short story writing_; but it’s a bit
expensive (Fee $48. We might not get that much for the story after we
had written it.). _Juvenile story writing_ is only $32; but we elect
_English e3f-4f--Play Production_. The fee for that is only $24,
which shows you how much money a lot of theatrical managers waste;
moreover, it is held in the Attic of Hamilton Hall, which sounds very
jolly. The Attic playwrights were always pretty good. And certainly
we must have _English e11-12--Public speaking_, which is only $16,
and gives us “drill in breathing, articulation, gesture and reading
aloud, after-dinner speaking; how to stir the emotions and move to
action.” Philosophy, of course, must not be neglected: we rather like
the look of _Philosophy e135--Radical, conservative, and reactionary
tendencies in present-day morals_, which seems to cover the ground.
(Fee $24.) _Photoplay composition e3--Advanced course_ “deals with
the finer phases of character delineation” (Fee $24) and ought to be a
pleasant relaxation, for “Scenario editors and directors will address
the students from time to time.” _Physical education eY1-Y2--Swimming_
($16) will very happily conclude that part of our course.
A great need in our life would obviously be filled by _Secretarial
Correspondence e2--Letter writing_ (Fee $24). This studies the methods
adopted by “Huxley, Lanier, Lowell, Henry James, William James, Mark
Twain, Cicero, Pliny the Younger, and the letter writers of the World
War” in dealing with their correspondence. But we are anxious to get
on to even more congenial subjects. _Cookery e3L--General Principles
of cookery and their application. Lectures and laboratory work_ (Fee
$30) appeals to us. Also _Cookery 41xL--Principles of candy making_
($10) and _Cookery e75L--Large quantity cookery_ (Fee $30). The only
difficulty here is that the costume required for laboratory courses
in cooking is “white cotton clothing, plain skirt; tailored waist;
plain white collar; long plain white apron with bib.” That presents
difficulties.
We thought that we had outlined a very full curriculum for ourself,
but then we see that our old friend Professor Roger Loomis is giving a
course (_English eB10_) on _Argumentative writing_, “planned especially
for those interested in the writing of editorials and controversial
articles.” That certainly we must also have (Fee $24).
The total seems to be $270, and certainly the excitement sounds well
worth it.
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