_How to Obtain a good Serviceable Light Porter._--Take a pint of stout,
and add a quart of spring water. There you have him.
_How to make Hats last._--Make everything else first.
_How to Prevent Ale from Spoiling._--Drink it.
_How to Avoid being Considered above your Business._--Never live over
your shop.
_How to make your Servants rise._--Send them up to sleep in the attics.
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[Illustration: _Bus Driver_ (_to charioteer of broken-down motor-car_).
"I've been tellin' yer all the week to taike it 'ome, an' now yer wants
to, yer cawn't!"]
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