THE TEA
'And what do you think of _him_?' asked mamma.
'Oh, I think he's very well,' replied Emily gaily.
'I should say he was very _toor_-lerable,' drawled Miss Jawleyford, who
reckoned herself rather a judge, and indeed had had some experience of
gentlemen.
'_Tolerable_, my dear!' rejoined Mrs. Jawleyford, 'I should say he's very
well--rather _distingue_, indeed.'
'I shouldn't say _that_,' replied Miss Jawleyford; 'his height and figure
are certainly in his favour, but he isn't quite my idea of a gentleman. He
is evidently on good terms with himself; but I should say, if it wasn't for
his forwardness, he'd be awkward and uneasy.'
'He's a fox-hunter, you know,' observed Emily.
'Well, but I don't know that that should make him different to other
people,' rejoined her sister. 'Captain Curzon, and Mr. Lancaster, and Mr.
Preston, were all fox-hunters; but they didn't stare, and blurt, and kick
their legs about, as this man does.'
'Oh, you are so fastidious!' rejoined her mamma; 'you must take men as you
find them.'
'I wonder where he lives?' observed Emily, who was quite ready to take our
friend as he was.
'I wonder where he _does_ live?' chimed in Mrs. Jawleyford, for the
suddenness of the descent had given them no time for inquiry. 'Somebody
said Manchester,' observed Miss Jawleyford drily.
'So much the better,' observed Mrs. Jawleyford, 'for then he is sure to
have plenty of money.'
'Law, ma! but you don't s'pose pa would ever allow such a thing,' retorted
Miss, recollecting her papa's frequent exhortations to them to look high.
'If he's a landowner,' observed Mrs. Jawleyford 'we'll soon find him out in
_Burke_. Emily, my dear,' added she, 'just go into your pa's room, and
bring me the _Commoners_--you'll find it on the large table between the
_Peerage_ and the _Wellington Despatches_.'
Emily tripped away to do as she was bid. The fair messenger presently
returned, bearing both volumes, richly bound and lettered, with the
Jawleyford crests studded down the backs, and an immense coat of arms on
the side.
A careful search among the S's produced nothing in the shape of Sponge.
'Not likely, I should think,' observed Miss Jawleyford, with a toss of her
head, as her mamma announced the fact.
'Well, never mind,' replied Mrs. Jawleyford, seeing that only one of the
girls could have him, and that one was quite ready; 'never mind, I dare say
I shall be able to find out something from himself,' and so they dropped
the subject.
In due time in swaggered our hero, himself, kicking his legs about as men
in tights or tops generally do.
'May I give you tea or coffee?' asked Emily, in the sweetest tone possible,
as she raised her finely turned gloveless arm towards where the glittering
appendages stood on the large silver tray.
'Neither, thank you,' said Sponge, throwing himself into an easy-chair
beside Mrs. Jawleyford. He then crossed his legs, and cocking up a toe for
admiration, began to yawn.
'You feel tired after your journey?' observed Mrs. Jawleyford.
'No, I'm not,' said Sponge, yawning again--a good yawn this time.
Miss Jawleyford looked significantly at her sister--a long pause ensued.
'I knew a family of your name,' at length observed Mrs. Jawleyford, in the
simple sort of way women begin pumping men. 'I knew a family of your name,'
repeated she, seeing Sponge was half asleep--'the Sponges of Toadey Hall.
Pray are they any relation of yours?'
'Oh--ah--yes,' blurted Sponge: 'I suppose they are. The fact
is--the--haw--Sponges--haw--are a rather large family--haw. Meet them
almost everywhere.'
'You don't live in the same county, perhaps?' observed Mrs. Jawleyford.
'No, we don't,' replied he, with a yawn.
'Is yours a good hunting country?' asked Jawleyford, thinking to sound him
in another way.
'No; a devilish bad 'un,' replied Sponge, adding with a grunt, 'or I
wouldn't be here.'
'Who hunts it?' asked Mr. Jawleyford.
'Why, as to that--haw,'--replied Sponge, stretching out his arms and legs
to their fullest extent, and yawning most vigorously--'why, as to that, I
can hardly say which you would call my country, for I have to do with so
many; but I should say, of all the countries I am--haw--connected
with--haw--Tom Scratch's is the worst.'
Mr. Jawleyford looked at Mrs. Jawleyford as a counsel who thinks he has
made a grand hit looks at a jury before he sits down, and said no more.
Mrs. Jawleyford looked as innocent as most jurymen do after one of these
forensic exploits.--Mr. Sponge beginning his nasal recreations, Mrs.
Jawleyford motioned the ladies off to bed--Mr. Sponge and his host
presently followed.