[Illustration: A Wicket Girl.]
SIR,--Ah me! and well-a-day! it is the grand sorrow of my life! I
cannot subscribe to this fund for Dr. GRACE. I dare not, except you
allow me to send it confidentially through you, Sir, ever the Ladies'
friend. Ah Sir! long ago my heart "went out"--to whom? no matter.
It was a cricketer. I never told my love! I long-stopped! But never,
never, shall I forget that memorable day when _he_ was there, and when
someone, Dr. G. will remember who it was, _bowled a maiden over!_ I am
not a heroine, but I may sign this (as I address it fervently to)
"GRACE DARLING!"
_The Lighthouse, A Little off--the Coast._
SIR,--I belong to an "Impi" tribe--with "cunious" added. Otherwise
would I contribute what I did to the first cricket-match I ever
played, when, as the ball was thrown at me, to save my head _I gave
a bob_. I cannot even do that now. But as a lover of the game I
hope that there are many youthful Britons eager to follow "_Exemplum
Gratiæ_."
Yours,
STUMP ORATOR.
DEAR SIR,--I think you are quite right to encourage cricket, as it is
a noble game. The Duke of WELLINGTON ones said that Trafalgar was won
on the Eton Playing-fields. I don't think he was quite right there, as
I have always been told that the battle was fought abroad. I am last
in my class, but I'm in the second Eleven. I'm often "not out," and
to-day I've had to "stay in" all the time during the match, because I
had a saying-lesson to write out and translate. The other day I made
27, including three fourers, against the United Thingummies.
I remain, yours enthusiastically,
TOMMY.
_The Only College._
P.S.--I will send my shilling as soon as I can get it from
BATLEY _mi._ He owes it me for birds' eggs.
SIR,--I am only too happy to contribute my mite, for though it's
some while--alas! how time flies--since I handled the willow, I well
remember playing in the early forties against ALFRED PITCHER and
JOHN TOSSER. Ah, they were heroes in those days. I myself was no mean
performer. I tell you, Sir, many's the time I have made double figures
against the underhand bowling of JIMMY TRUNDLER, and he _could_ bowl,
too! before the round-arm style came in. I never took kindly to that,
but these fifty years I have been an ardent looker-on, and I must tell
you, &c. &c.[*]
JNO. WARDLE.
(_Late Member of All-Muggleton C. C._)
[Footnote *: "No you mustn't." Caught out by Editor.]
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[Illustration: "A FLYING VISIT."
EMPEROR WILLIAM (_to_ MADAME LA RÉPUBLIQUE _leaving Kiel after very
Kiel after very brief stay_). "MUST YOU _REALLY_ GO? _SO_ SORRY!"]
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[Illustration: "_Perfeck Lidy_" (_who has just been ejected_). "WELL,
_NEXT_ TIME I GOES INTO A PUBLICKOUSE, I'LL GO SOMEWHERE WHERE I'LL BE
_RESPECTED!_"]
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