[75] _Kruptadia_: Heilbronn, Henninger Frères, 1883: vol. 1, _Secret
Stories from the Russian_, No. 12.
A peasant and his wife had a half-witted son, who pictured himself
married and sleeping with his wife. He spoke of this matter to his
father.
“Marry me, little father,” he said.
Said the little father:
“Wait, my son. You are still too young to marry. Thy yard hath not yet
reached to thy backside. When it doth reach there, I will marry thee.”
The son seized his yard with his two hands, stretched it with all his
strength, and inspected it.
“‘Tis true,” quoth he. “It hath not yet reached to my backside. ‘Tis
still too soon for me to marry. My yard is yet small. It reacheth not
to my backside. I must wait a year or two.”
Time passed. The youth had naught to do but lengthen his yard; and he
did it so often and so well that not only did his yard reach to his
backside, but even passed beyond it.
“I shall have no shame in sleeping with my wife,” said he. “I will
satisfy her myself. She will have no need to resort to strangers.”
“Vain to expect sense on the part of a fool,” argued the father to
himself; and he spake his son, saying:
“Since thy yard is become so great that it passeth beyond thy backside,
there is no need for thee to marry. Live single, rest at home, and
futter thyself.”