Leap Year Anticipations.--A fine spring is expected in France, Flanders
and Poland. If the weather is propitious a total eclipse will be visible
in Berlin and Vienna.
***
Asked by some American journalists where the Peace Conference would be
held, Dr. SVEN HEDIN is reported to have said, "Peace will be dictated
from Berlin." And so say all of us!
***
Relations between Potsdam and Sofia are said to be badly strained. Three
days after the Kaiser had issued his celebrated manifesto, "To my noble
and heroic Serbian people," FERDINAND in the Sobranje was publicly
denouncing the Serbians as obstinate, treacherous, and tyrannical. The
KAISER considers this conduct extremely tactless, and threatens, if it
continues, to spell Bulgarian with a "V."
***
All hitherto-published explanations of the threatened German attack on
the Suez Canal are hereby cancelled. The fact is that the KAISER'S fleet
is increasing so rapidly that it has outgrown its present accommodation.
***
During the visit of Mr. FORD'S Ark to Bergen the following notice was
posted up at the Grand Hotel:--"All members of the Henry Ford Peace
Expedition are requested to call for their laundry at the Grand Hotel,
Room 408, Tuesday evening after supper. This notice supersedes the
original plan to have the laundry delivered to each individual hotel."
It may also explain why the members of the expedition have since washed
their dirty linen in public.
***
Some of the pilgrims on the _Oscar II._ were much annoyed at the
prohibition of card-playing on board. "What is the use," they asked, "of
crying _Pax_ when there are none?"
***
Some strait-laced Conservatives, who were a little shocked to see the
announcement of "Mr. Balfour on the Film," were comforted on its being
pointed out to them that Mr. CHAPLIN set him the example.
***
A ten-year-old girl's essay on "Patriotism":--"Patriotism is composed of
patriots, and they are people who live in Ireland and want Mr. Redmond
or other people to be King of Ireland. They are very brave, some of
them, and are so called after St. Patrick, who is Ireland's private
saint. The patriots who are brave make splendid soldiers. The patriots
who are not brave go to America."
***
Lord KITCHENER, who has a choice collection of old china, has lately
added to it several fine specimens of Crown Derby.
***
So many Parliamentarians have recently requested the Treasury to stop
sending them their £400 a year that a slight change in the designation
of the others is suggested--P.M. (Paid Member) instead of M.P.
***
A soldier's letter: "DEAR SIS,--You ask what I want--well, for Heaven's
sake send us a barber! You never saw such heads in your life as we've
got.
Lovingly, Bob.