Whether the Duties of Piety Towards One's Parents Should Be Omitted
for the Sake of Religion?
Objection 1: It seems that the duties of piety towards one's parents
should be omitted for the sake of religion. For Our Lord said (Luke
14:26): "If any man come to Me, and hate not his father, and mother,
and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea and his own
life also, he cannot be My disciple." Hence it is said in praise of
James and John (Matt. 4:22) that they left "their nets and father,
and followed" Christ. Again it is said in praise of the Levites
(Deut. 33:9): "Who hath said to his father, and to his mother: I do
not know you; and to his brethren: I know you not; and their own
children they have not known. These have kept Thy word." Now a man
who knows not his parents and other kinsmen, or who even hates them,
must needs omit the duties of piety. Therefore the duties of piety
should be omitted for the sake of religion.
Obj. 2: Further, it is written (Luke 9:59, 60) that in answer to him
who said: "Suffer me first to go and bury my father," Our Lord
replied: "Let the dead bury their dead: but go thou, and preach the
kingdom of God." Now the latter pertains to religion, while it is a
duty of piety to bury one's father. Therefore a duty of piety should
be omitted for the sake of religion.
Obj. 3: Further, God is called "Our Father" by excellence. Now just
as we worship our parents by paying them the duties of piety so do we
worship God by religion. Therefore the duties of piety should be
omitted for the sake of the worship of religion.
Obj. 4: Further, religious are bound by a vow which they may not
break to fulfil the observances of religion. Now in accordance with
those observances they are hindered from supporting their parents,
both on the score of poverty, since they have nothing of their own,
and on the score of obedience, since they may not leave the cloister
without the permission of their superior. Therefore the duties of
piety towards one's parents should be omitted for the sake of
religion.
_On the contrary,_ Our Lord reproved the Pharisees (Matt. 15:3-6) who
taught that for the sake of religion one ought to refrain from paying
one's parents the honor we owe them.
_I answer that,_ Religion and piety are two virtues. Now no virtue is
opposed to another virtue, since according to the Philosopher, in his
book on the Categories (Cap. De oppos.), "good is not opposed to
good." Therefore it is impossible that religion and piety mutually
hinder one another, so that the act of one be excluded by the act of
the other. Now, as stated above (I-II, Q. 7, A. 2; Q. 18, A. 3), the
act of every virtue is limited by the circumstances due thereto, and
if it overstep them it will be an act no longer of virtue but of
vice. Hence it belongs to piety to pay duty and homage to one's
parents according to the due mode. But it is not the due mode that
man should tend to worship his father rather than God, but, as
Ambrose says on Luke 12:52, "the piety of divine religion takes
precedence of the claims of kindred."
Accordingly, if the worship of one's parents take one away from the
worship of God it would no longer be an act of piety to pay worship
to one's parents to the prejudice of God. Hence Jerome says (Ep. ad
Heliod.): "Though thou trample upon thy father, though thou spurn thy
mother, turn not aside, but with dry eyes hasten to the standard of
the cross; it is the highest degree of piety to be cruel in this
matter." Therefore in such a case the duties of piety towards one's
parents should be omitted for the sake of the worship religion gives
to God. If, however, by paying the services due to our parents, we
are not withdrawn from the service of God, then will it be an act of
piety, and there will be no need to set piety aside for the sake of
religion.
Reply Obj. 1: Gregory expounding this saying of our Lord says (Hom.
xxxvii in Ev.) that "when we find our parents to be a hindrance in
our way to God, we must ignore them by hating and fleeing from them."
For if our parents incite us to sin, and withdraw us from the service
of God, we must, as regards this point, abandon and hate them. It is
in this sense that the Levites are said to have not known their
kindred, because they obeyed the Lord's command, and spared not the
idolaters (Ex. 32). James and John are praised for leaving their
parents and following our Lord, not that their father incited them to
evil, but because they deemed it possible for him to find another
means of livelihood, if they followed Christ.
Reply Obj. 2: Our Lord forbade the disciple to bury his father
because, according to Chrysostom (Hom. xxviii in Matth.), "Our Lord
by so doing saved him from many evils, such as the sorrows and
worries and other things that one anticipates under these
circumstances. For after the burial the will had to be read, the
estate had to be divided, and so forth: but chiefly, because there
were others who could see to the funeral." Or, according to Cyril's
commentary on Luke 9, "this disciple's request was, not that he might
bury a dead father, but that he might support a yet living father in
the latter's old age, until at length he should bury him. This is
what Our Lord did not grant, because there were others, bound by the
duties of kindred, to take care of him."
Reply Obj. 3: Whatever we give our parents out of piety is referred
by us to God; just as other works of mercy which we perform with
regard to any of our neighbors are offered to God, according to Matt.
25:40: "As long as you did it to one of . . . My least . . . you did
it to Me." Accordingly, if our carnal parents stand in need of our
assistance, so that they have no other means of support, provided
they incite us to nothing against God, we must not abandon them for
the sake of religion. But if we cannot devote ourselves to their
service without sin, or if they can be supported without our
assistance, it is lawful to forego their service, so as to give more
time to religion.
Reply Obj. 4: We must speak differently of one who is yet in the
world, and of one who has made his profession in religion. For he
that is in the world, if he has parents unable to find support
without him, he must not leave them and enter religion, because he
would be breaking the commandment prescribing the honoring of
parents. Some say, however, that even then he might abandon them, and
leave them in God's care. But this, considered aright, would be to
tempt God: since, while having human means at hand, he would be
exposing his parents to danger, in the hope of God's assistance. On
the other hand, if the parents can find means of livelihood without
him, it is lawful for him to abandon them and enter religion, because
children are not bound to support their parents except in cases of
necessity, as stated above. He that has already made his profession
in religion is deemed to be already dead to the world: wherefore he
ought not, under pretext of supporting his parents, to leave the
cloister where he is buried with Christ, and busy himself once more
with worldly affairs. Nevertheless he is bound, saving his obedience
to his superiors, and his religious state withal, to make points
efforts for his parents' support.
_______________________