_Brybury-on-the-Pocket._--Both candidates very busy. Meetings are
being held all day long at the principal hotels, and any number of
livery-stable-keepers have promised to lend their carriages on the
day of election. The agents on either side have an enormous staff of
assistants, and trade was never known to be brisker during the present
century.
_Crowncrushington._--This will be a very near contest. As political
feeling runs rather high, a number of extra beds have been prepared in
the hospitals. The police have been reinforced, and the military are
close at hand, and every other preparation has been made to secure the
declaration of the poll with as little friction as possible.
_Meddle-cum-Muddleborough._--At present there are seven candidates,
but as three of these have issued their manifestoes under some
misapprehension it is not unlikely that the number will be reduced
before the day of nomination. It is not easy to foretell the result, as
since the establishment of the ballot every election has ended not only
in surprise but stupefaction.
_Selfseekington._--It is not unlikely that there will be no contest
in this important borough. The (until recently) sitting member has
fixed the day that would naturally have fallen to the function of the
returning officer for the laying of the foundation stones of his Baths,
Wash-houses, Free Library and Town Hall, and the opening of his Public
Park.
_Wrottenborough._--The popular candidate has pledged himself to
supporting Local Veto, the Licensed Victuallers, Establishment,
Disestablishment, Home Rule, the Integrity of the Empire,
Anti-Vaccination, the Freedom of the Medical Profession, and many other
matters of conflicting importance. The polling will be of a perfunctory
character, as expenses are being cut down on both sides.
_Zany-town-on-the-Snooze._--There will be no contest in this division.
At present there is no intelligence of any sort to chronicle.
* * * * *
TAG FOR THE TESTIMONIAL.--"The power of GRACE, the
magic of a name."
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