native of Wirtemberg, called on me. She said that she had come to
England to perfect herself in English, and purposed afterwards to
return to Germany to establish a boarding school for young ladies,
and especially for English young ladies. Having heard that I was a
German, she came to obtain my advice, and to request me to interest
myself for her in getting her pupils to instruct in German, in order
thus to support herself while in England. After having conversed with
her for some time about these things, and given her the information
which she desired, I then spoke to her about the things of God, in
which conversation I soon found, that though she might have had some
religious feelings from time to time, yet that she did not know the
Lord. On leaving me I gave her the first and second part of my
Narrative, which I thought she would read because it contained the
experience of a German, and thus she would also have exercise in
English. I then followed with my prayers the reading of the book,
that God would be pleased to bless it to the conversion of her soul.
After some time she called on me again, telling me that she had been
deeply interested in reading my Narrative, and asked me whether I had
any objection to her translating the book into German, with the view
of getting it published on her return to Germany. My reply was that I
had no right to object to it; for, in so far as translation into
another language was concerned, the book was everyones property. I
might have mentioned that I did not think her yet sufficiently
acquainted either with the English language or the state of things in
England, especially religiously, and that, as she was not converted
herself, she could not give the exact translation of the book, though
she were qualified with reference to the two former points; but, as I
had the spiritual benefit of the individual in view, I thought thus
with myself; this person has no employment at present, and by
translating this book she will be kept from the many snares connected
with idleness; she will by this means also make progress in English,
which she is desirous of doing; but, most of all, the fact of
translating a book for the press will oblige her more accurately and
attentively to consider what is contained in it, than she would be
obliged to do, were she simply to read it through several times, and
therefore this work may, with Gods blessing, be instrumental in
doing good to her soul. The last point weighed particularly with me;
I therefore did not discourage her, though at the same time I did not
encourage her, but left the matter to herself. As, however, she left
me with the impression that she was going to translate the book, I
asked the Lord to convert her soul in doing so. After a time Mrs. G.
called on me again, and brought me a part of the manuscript, that I
might read it over. I took it, but could not promise her to read it;
for I had little prospect of doing so, for want of time. Nevertheless
I read a few pages, which I found rather better translated than I had
expected. After this she brought me at two or three other times
considerable parts of the translation, which, however, I had never
time to read. By this time the winter had passed away, and it was
come to March, 1842, when all of a sudden, one Wednesday afternoon, I
was seized with sharp pains, something like spasms, which were so
acute that, though they passed off after about an hour, they left me
so weak, that I was not able to go out to our usual meeting on that
evening. About seven oclock, just when I should have been at the
meeting but for this illness, Mrs. G., who for several weeks had been
at Trowbridge, to finish the translation, and to instruct a young
lady in German, came to take leave of me. She said she now purposed
to return to Wirtemberg. Though I was very weak, yet, under these
circumstances, I could not decline seeing her, as it would be in all
human probability the last time that I should do so. I therefore
besought the Lord to strengthen me for this service (which I soon
perceived He had done), and, after a short conversation with her
about her circumstances, I began to speak to her about her soul, and
soon found she was heavy laden, burdened under her sins, and broken
in heart. With many tears, she told me that she was a great sinner,
an exceedingly great sinner. Every word she spoke gave me the
impression, that all she now needed was to have the work of Christ
pointed out to her, i.e. the power of His blood in cleansing from all
sin, by faith in His name. I spent about two hours with her, and she
left me with many tears.--I also had said to her at the beginning of
the conversation with reference to the translation of my Narrative,
that if she still desired to publish it, she should seek to get the
assistance of a pious clergyman in Germany, who understood English
well--On the next morning about nine Mrs. G. called again upon me,
telling me that she could not leave Bristol without seeing me once
more. She now spent about three hours more with me, in which she told
me that, during the night, which she had chiefly spent in prayer and
reading the word of God, she had found peace in the Lord Jesus, and
that she was now happy in Him. She further told me, that, after she
had translated a part of my Narrative, the Spirit of God began to
work upon her heart, by convincing her that she was a great sinner.
The further she went on, the more she felt what a sinner she was,
till at last, when she was come towards the end of the book, she came
to the conclusion to return to Germany. I now gave her some advice in
reference to her return, and also what she should do with reference
to her spiritual welfare, after her return to Wirtemberg. After this
she left me. About two or three weeks after (in April, 1842) I
received a long letter from her, written on her way homeward, by
which I was still further confirmed that, although Mrs. G. was only a
mere babe in Christ, yet that she was a babe, and that a real work of
grace had been begun in her heart. I then wrote to her, but from that
time till towards the end of May, 1843, I heard no more of her.
Towards the end of May, 1843, however, I received a long letter from
her, dated Stuttgart (capital of the kingdom of Wirtemberg). In this
letter Mrs. G. gave me an outline of her history during the year
after she had returned to her country. Suffice it here to say, that
she had sought in vain to find Christians with whom she could be
united in fellowship according to the truths she thought she saw in
my Narrative, and according to what she had seen and heard at our
meetings in. Bristol. At last, about New-year, 1843, she became
acquainted with a little baptist church, which was separated from the
State church, and she was after a time baptized and received into
fellowship among them, which took place in Feb. 1843. Soon, however,
she found things different, as to church order, etc., from what she
had seen amongst us in Bristol, or from what she had learnt from my
Narrative, especially with reference to close baptist principles,
which in the highest and strongest degree were practised among the
brethren at Stuttgart: and she wrote to me, to ask my view about that
point, as she felt pained at separating from true believers, because
they might not be instructed about believers baptism. Her letter was
accompanied by another letter from one of the brethren of the baptist
church, Dr. R--, a solicitor or barrister to the upper tribunal of
the kingdom of Wirtemberg. The letter of the latter testified of the
gracious spirit of the writer, but also that he likewise held the
separating views of close communion, and that he, having read the
translation of my Narrative in manuscript, seemed to be drawn and
knit to me affectionately, but wished to have, upon Scriptural
ground, my views about open communion.
Before I received these letters, I had been repeatedly asked, during
my fourteen years residence in England, why I did not labour in my
native country. The importance also of doing so had been pointed out
to me; nor was I myself insensible to this; but my answer had always
been: "I must labour where the Lord will have me to be, and as I have
never seen it to be the Lords will, that I should labour in Germany,
I ought not to do so." About fourteen months before I received these
letters, it had been also more than ever laid on my heart by brother
R. C. He had seen something of the religious state of the Continent,
and he had heard still more about it, and he had found, almost every
where, that when he set truth before brethren, they said, It is
Scriptural, you are right; but if we were to practice this, what
would be the consequences? what would become of us and our wives and
children? or something of that kind. Brother C. therefore came on
purpose to see me, on his return from Denmark, to lay it on my heart
to visit Germany, on account of my being a native and having been led
by the Lord as I had. He told me especially that he considered it of
importance that I should publish my Narrative in German, in order
that thus the faith of the brethren., with the Lords blessing, might
be strengthened, and that they might be led to act according to the
light which they had. All this seemed to me very important: but my
answer was as before; I cannot go till the Lord calls me. Scarcely
had I read the letters from Mrs. G. and Dr. R--, but I felt: now is
the time come when I am to go to Germany; and from that time I gave
myself to prayer about it. When I afterwards communicated my feeling
on the subject to brother R. C. he said; I am not surprised about it,
for from the time that I spoke to you on the subject, I have been
constantly asking the Lord to bring it about.
--The reasons that pointed it out to me as the Lords will, that I
ought to go to Germany to labour there for a season, were these. 1, I
knew not of one single body of believers, who were gathered on
scriptural principles. In all the States of Germany, with scarcely
any exception, believers are connected with the State Churches, and
the very few believers of whom I had heard that they were separated,
I knew to be close Baptists, who, generally, by their most exclusive
separate views, only confirmed believers in remaining in the
Establishment. Especially of the Baptist Church at Stuttgart I had
much reason to believe this. It seemed to me therefore important to
go to Germany, and labour there for a season., if it might please the
Lord to condescend to use me to put a light on a candlestick,
howsoever dimly it might be burning at the first, so that by means
thereof the light might be spread in other parts of Germany. 2, As I
am a German, and therefore familiar with the language, there seemed
to me an especial call that I should take on myself this service,
particularly as my experience in connexion with several bodies of
believers, during the 13 1/2 years previous to this time, would be of
great help in this service. 3, It seemed further to me to be the
Lords will that I should go to Germany, in order that I might
publish my Narrative of the Lords dealings with me (which Mrs. G.
had not been able to accomplish), and that not simply in the form of
a translation, but so that it should be prepared for the press just
as the necessities of the believers in Germany (who, with scarcely
any exceptions, are not only connected with the Establishment, but
have no idea that there is any where else any thing besides
Establishment) might require it. Thus, I judged, something would be
given to Germany of the practical working of labouring out of the
Establishment; of meeting only as believers in the name of the Lord
Jesus, irrespective of any particular religious party or sect, and
that in dependence upon the power and presence of the Holy Ghost in
the Church of Christ; of dependence upon the Lord alone for every
thing; of recognising no other book but the Holy Scriptures for our
rule concerning every thing, &c.; and thus my Narrative, if the Lord
allowed me to publish it, might be working still, after I had left
Germany. 4, Up to that time I had never known an open door for me to
labour on the Continent, at least not in Germany; for in the
Establishment I neither could labour with a good conscience,
according to the light which the Lord had been pleased to give me,
nor should I have been permitted to have done so; and I was not
acquainted with believers on the Continent out of the Establishment;
and as to preaching in the open air, or going somewhere and taking a
place for preaching, any thing of this sort was out of the question;
for I was too well acquainted with the police of Germany, not to know
that that would not be permitted. But now I heard of an open door. At
Stuttgart, I judged, I might labour in expounding the truth in this
close Baptist Church, and seek to bring these dear brethren out of
their sectarian views. 5, But that which in connexion with these four
reasons had likewise much influence upon me, was this: During the
fourteen years that I had been in England, I had never had my mind
drawn to labour on the Continent, and now the very opposite was the
case. It was but two or three days before I received those letters
from Stuttgart, that I had again expressed my mind as to labouring in
Germany, i.e. that I felt no call from the Lord to do it, and had no
drawing towards it. Now the case was altogether otherwise. I could
not but pray about it; I could not but feel drawn to go to Germany in
love to the Lord and in pity towards the poor Church of Christ in
that country. Naturally there was nothing inviting; for I saw a hard
struggle before me with reference to the brethren who were to be won
for the truth, and to be brought out of their errors; in the
Continental manners and the long and beautiful journey on the Rhine I
saw, through grace, no charm, and certainly I saw nothing in them
which would induce me to leave home, but the reverse; the fourth
Orphan-House was on the point of being opened, and I, naturally, was
very reluctant to be absent from it just then; the labour would be
great in Germany, and work would heap up greatly for me in Bristol,
during my absence. But with all this:--the leading of my mind to
Germany still remained.
The more I prayed about these points, the more I judged it to be from
the Lord, that I should go for a season to Germany. It was but a few
days, before I had the fullest assurance in my soul, (after much
prayer, much self-examination in the fear of God, and after much
looking at these five points), that it was the will of God I should
go; yet even then I did not speak publicly about it.
After having come to the conclusion, that, as far as I could see, it
was the will of God that I should go, I began prayerfully to look at
the difficulties there were in the way, which were principally these.
1. the New Orphan-House needed to be opened, and all the work in
connexion with it was to be done before I could leave; because I
could not judge it to be of God, that this work, which was begun,
should remain unfinished, except absolute necessity pointed it out,
as otherwise it would be a waste of money, a breach of promise to the
relatives whose children were to be received, &c. I therefore asked
the Lord to help me through all this work, which was not a little,
before I could leave. 2. I judged it for various reasons important,
not to leave the work of the Orphan-Houses, Day-Schools, &c., without
leaving such a sum of money behind, as would, at least for about two
months, defray the probable current expenses for the work, therefore
a few hundred pounds I thought it desirable to leave behind, in order
that the burden of the work might not be left upon the shoulders of
my dear fellow-labourers. I had therefore by prayer to get this sum
from the Lord, for the obtaining of which I had no natural prospects
whatever. 3. Another obstacle in the way was, want of money for
traveling expenses to and from Stuttgart, and means for staying there
at least for a time, and that not only for myself, but for my dear
wife; for I judged, for various reasons, that it was the will of God
she should accompany me in this service, but principally because her
health was not equal to being left in Bristol, with the
responsibility of the work resting upon her in my absence. This again
would require a considerable sum, I mean considerable for me, a poor
man. The means I then had of my own as far as I now remember, were
not enough, if they had been multiplied by fifty. This obstacle was
to be removed by prayer. 4. One of the especial reasons for which I
saw it to be the Lords will that I should go to Germany was, the
publishing of my Narrative, at a cheap price (2s. for both parts), or
to be given away gratuitously, so that the poor might have it. But
this could not be obtained, except I published it on my own account,
to avoid the publishers putting a higher price upon it. Then again,
as so much expense of time was connected with printing it, I
intended, if once I went to Germany, to print not less than 4000
copies; and what is even that number among the many millions whose
language is German. But whence was the money to come for all this; an
expense which, though printing and paper are very much cheaper in
Germany than in England, yet I knew would cost between one and two
hundred pounds. For this, then, also, I, a poor man, betook myself to
the living God, being fully assured, that, as He had pointed out to
me His will with reference to my going, He would also most assuredly
provide the means. Nay, I had a secret satisfaction in the greatness
of the difficulties which were in the way. So far from being cast
down on account of them, they delighted my soul; for I only desired
to do the will of the Lord in this matter. In honesty of heart, I had
examined the matter, as standing before God. I wished only to know
His will, that I might do it. I judged, it was His will that I should
go to Germany, and therefore determined in His fear that I would go.
When I therefore saw the difficulties, they cast me not down, but
cheered me; for as it was the will of God, according to my judgment,
that I should go, I was sure He would remove the obstacles out of the
way; and therefore the greater the obstacles, the more abundantly
plain the proof, that I had come to a right judgment, if they were
removed by prayer; but if after all I had been mistaken, which I
could not think I had been, then, the sooner I was undeceived the
better. How different such a state of heart, from what it would have
been, if somehow or other the love for a Continental tour, or the
desire to go up the beautiful Rhine, had beguiled me: then I should
not have liked to look at the difficulties, or at least I should have
sought to have them removed by my own efforts. But as it was, I did
nothing but pray. Prayer and faith, the universal remedies against
every want and every difficulty; and the nourishment of prayer and
faith, Gods holy word, helped me over all the difficulties.--I never
remember, in all my Christian course, a period now (in October 1881)
of fifty-five years and eleven months, that I ever SINCERELY and
PATIENTLY sought to know the will of God by the teaching of the Holy
Ghost, through the instrumentality of the word of God, but I have
been ALWAYS directed rightly. But if honesty of heart and uprightness
before God were lacking, or if I did not patiently wait upon God for
instruction, or if I preferred the counsel of my fellow men to the
declarations of the word of the living God, I made great mistakes.--5.
A fifth difficulty in the way was, to find a sister, as matron, for
the new Orphan-House, who, as far as I could see, would be suitable;
for there were reasons why the sister, of whom I had first thought,
could not be engaged for this work. This was no small difficulty in
the way, not only as a point important in itself, but also because I
could not proceed with the fitting up of the house, &c., till such a
sister had been found.
In the beginning of June, I began therefore to give myself to prayer,
along with my wife and her sister who lived with us, making it a
point, every morning after family prayer, to retire together for the
express purpose of asking the Lord to remove these five difficulties,
if it were indeed, as I judged, His holy will, that I should labour
for a season on the Continent. In addition to this we day by day
asked His blessing upon the brethren at Stuttgart among whom I was
looking forward to labour, and upon unconverted persons with whom I
might come in contact on the Continent in the ministry of the Gospel
publicly or privately. We asked Him also especially to prepare the
hearts of the brethren in Germany for my service, to help me in
writing the book, to bless it, &c. We asked Him further, to be with
the Church in Bristol, during my absence, to use my absence as a
means of making the gifts, which He had bestowed among us, more
abundantly manifest, to help the labourers in the Orphan-Houses and
Day-Schools during my absence, &c. Thus we were, morning by morning,
waiting upon the Lord, and enlarging our petitions as the Holy Spirit
might lead me in prayer. But whilst we were thus day by day waiting
upon the Lord, the difficulties, instead of being removed, appeared
to increase. For instance: instead of money coming in for the
Orphans, the Day-Schools, and the other objects of the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution, there was considerably more expended than came
in, so that we were getting almost poor. Instead of finding a sister,
who seemed suitable as matron for the new Orphan-House, I had the
prospect of losing another sister out of the work, who considered it
her place to leave Bristol. But notwithstanding all this, my soul was
at peace, being fully assured, that I could not be mistaken, as I had
come through sincere, patient, and prayerful consideration of the
whole matter at last to the conclusion, it was the will of the Lord
that I should go to Germany, to labour there in the Word, and publish
my Narrative in the German language. Faith therefore saw all the
difficulties already removed. Faith could give thanks, while the
difficulties yet remained. Faith could triumph, though there seemed
the death blow coming, since there not only was no money coming in,
but the considerable sums, lately in hand, were rapidly diminishing;
and, instead of finding a sister for the new Orphan-House, another
sister seemed on the point of leaving. Thus forty days had been
passing away, whilst day after day we had been waiting unitedly upon
the Lord; but the obstacles were greater than ever, yet my confidence
in the Lord, that He would remove the difficulties in His own time,
was greater than ever also. It was on July 12 that I said to a
sister, being led to it by the certain prospect of one of the dear
labourers in the Orphan-Houses going to leave; "Well, my soul is at
peace. The Lords time is not yet come, but, when it is come, He will
blow away all these obstacles, as chaff is blown away before the
wind." It was only ONE QUARTER OF AN HOUR after, when the following
paper was put into my hands, whereby I obtained power over 702l. 3s.
7d.
"1st, The poor brethren and sisters of our dear Lord and Saviour. In
connexion with the Employment-Fund or otherwise [i.e. might be given
away in connexion with the Employment-Fund or otherwise.]
2nd, Sending help in the Gospel of Christ to the dear brethren in
Germany, or publishing the Narrative.
3rd, The dear Orphan-Children.
4th, To complete the payment of the expenses incurred by building a
chapel for the meeting of the saints at Barnstaple.
I leave the sums, to be used in these several objects, under the
Lord, to the judgment of the Lords servant, brother Müller, knowing
assuredly that He whose steward he is will direct and guide him in
this and every other matter.--His holy name be praised for the REAL
JOY I feel today in doing a thing, which a few weeks since was a
trying act of obedience. Surely, the statutes of the Lord are right,
rejoicing the heart. In keeping of them there is great reward.--July
10, 1843."
Thus three of the hinderances were at once removed; for I was by this
sum furnished with travelling expenses, and with what might be
required for my stay in Germany, had means to publish 4000 copies of
my Narrative, and was able to leave means behind for the work in
Bristol, sufficient for at least two months. When I received this
note, I was not in the least excited, but took the circumstance as
quietly as if it were a matter which could not be otherwise. I had
been sure, that, when the Lords time was come, He would send the
means, and according to my faith it was now granted to me; and a
proof, that up to the last I did believe, was, that when the money
came, it did not surprise me. The 702l. 3s. 7d. was not portioned out
(except what was sent to Barnstaple), till my return, as I could not
know how much each object might require. It was thus spent. 1, For
the chapel at Barnstaple, 80l. 7s. 1d. 2, For poor saints, 112l. 2s.,
spent in a great measure in providing them or their children with
linen and clothes, and for the Employment-Fund, 50l. 3, For
publishing 4000 copies of the two parts of my Narrative in German,
our travelling expenses to and from Stuttgart, our stay for nearly
seven months in Germany, and other expenses connected with my service
in Wirtemberg, 267l. 4s. 11d. 4, The remainder of the 702l. 3s. 7d.,
being 192l. 9s. 7d., I put to the Orphan-Fund, not that so much was
in hand on my return from Germany; for I had drawn on the strength of
what was in the hands of my bankers.
Shortly after I had received the 702l. 3s. 7d. on July 12, the Lord
was pleased to remove the other difficulties also; for a sister was
found for the matrons place in the new Orphan-House, and after this
the Lord helped me through the work connected with fitting up the
house for the reception of the children. The Lord likewise made it
plain to the sister who had purposed to leave her situation, that she
should remain in Bristol. Thus all the difficulties were by prayer
and faith removed, after we had been, day by day, more than fifty
days waiting upon the Lord.
On Aug. 3rd, I received a valuable donation of plate, jewellery,
china, linen., books, etc., which was a still further proof of the
Lords readiness to supply all that might be needed during my absence
in Germany, and also of His having heard our requests that He would
be pleased to send in means before my departure. Most of these
articles were readily disposed of, so that, even before I had set
out, about 60l. had come in for them.
On Aug. 9, 1843, my dear wife and I left Bristol in company of a
German sister, Miss W. The latter, together with a Swiss brother, had
been led to see the truth of believers baptism, and had much wished
to be baptized; but as the baptist church at Stuttgart had refused
them baptism, except they would promise never to take the Lords
supper any more with unbaptized believers, or with those who belonged
to any State Church, to which they could not conscientiously submit,
they had undertaken the journey of nearly 800 miles to come to
Bristol, to be baptized by me, as they both had read the translation
of my Narrative in manuscript, and thus knew that we receive all who
believe in the Lord Jesus, though they should not agree with us in
all parts of truth. They had arrived in Bristol about a fortnight
before my departure for Germany, and were baptized at Bethesda a week
after their arrival, when I gave an address in German, and used the
words of the German translation of the Holy Scriptures which contain
the institution of baptism, as neither the brother nor sister
understood English. The brother, who had been a teacher and cashier
in a considerable establishment in Wirtemberg for educating young
gentlemen, and who had lost his situation when his views with
reference to baptism became known, remained in England as teacher of
the French and German languages, and the sister travelled back with
us to Germany.
During the time of my absence from Bristol, I kept no journal, and
therefore I cannot give a minute account of all that transpired, and
that might be interesting to the believing reader; but as some
letters which I wrote to one of my sisters-in-law are preserved, and
also all the letters which I wrote to the brethren in Bristol, among
whom I labour, I shall be able by giving these letters, to furnish a
pretty full account of my service in Germany up to my return.
The following Letter to my sister-in-law gives some account of a
great part of our journey.
Weinheim, Aug. 19, 1843.
My dear L.,