OR, BRIEF ACCOUNT OF THE PUBLISHING THIS WORK. WRITTEN BY THE AUTHOR
THEREOF, AND DEDICATED TO THOSE WHOM GOD HATH COUNTED HIM WORTHY TO BEGET
TO FAITH, BY HIS MINISTRY IN THE WORD
CHILDREN, Grace be with you. _Amen_. I being taken from you in
presence, and so tied up that I cannot perform that duty, that from God
doth lie upon me to you-ward, for your farther edifying and building up
in faith and holiness, etc., yet that you may see my soul hath fatherly
care and desire after your spiritual and everlasting welfare, I now once
again, as before, from the top of _Shenir_ and _Hermon_, so now from _the
lions’ dens_, _from the mountains of the leopards_ (Song iv. 8), do look
yet after you all, greatly longing to see your safe arrival into THE
desired Haven.
I thank God upon every remembrance of you; and rejoice, even while I
stick between the teeth of the lion in the wilderness, that the grace and
mercy, and knowledge of Christ our Saviour, which God hath bestowed upon
you, with abundance of faith and love; your hungerings and thirstings
after farther acquaintance with the Father, in the Son; your tenderness
of heart, your trembling at sin, your sober and holy deportment also,
before both God and men, is a great refreshment to me; _For ye are our
glory and joy_. 1 Thess. ii. 20.
I have sent you here enclosed, a drop of that honey that I have taken out
of the carcase of a lion. Judg. xiv. 5–8. I have eaten thereof myself,
and am much refreshed thereby. (Temptations, when we meet them at first,
are as the lion that roared upon _Samson_; but if we overcome them, the
next time we see them, we shall find a nest of honey within them.) The
_Philistines_ understand me not. It is something of a relation of the
work of God upon my soul, even from the very first, till now, wherein you
may perceive my castings down, and risings up: for He woundeth, and His
hands make whole. It is written in the Scripture, Isa. xxxviii. 19, _The
father to the children shall make known Thy truth_. Yea, it was for this
reason I lay so long at Sinai, Lev. iv. 10, 11, to see the fire, and the
cloud, and the darkness, _that I might fear the Lord all the days of my
life upon earth_, _and tell of His wondrous works to my children_. Psalm
lxxviii. 3–5.
Moses, Numb. xxxiii. 1, 2, writ of the journeys of the children of
_Israel_, from _Egypt_ to the land of _Canaan_; and commanded also that
they did remember their forty years’ travel in the wilderness. _Thou
shalt remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee these forty
years in the wilderness_, _to humble thee_, _and to prove thee_, _and to
know what was in thine heart_, _whether thou wouldst keep His
commandments_, _or no_. Deut. viii. 2. Wherefore this I have
endeavoured to do; and not only so, but to publish it also; that, if God
will, others may be put in remembrance of what He hath done for their
souls, by reading His work upon me.
It is profitable for Christians to be often calling to mind the very
beginnings of grace with their souls. _It is a night to be much observed
unto the Lord_, _for bringing them out from the land of Egypt_. _This is
that night of the Lord to be observed of all the children of Israel in
their generations_. Exod. xii. 42. _O my God_ (saith _David_), Ps.
xlii. 6, _my soul is cast down within me_; _therefore will I remember
thee from the land of Jordan_, _and of the Hermonites_, _from the hill
Mizar_. He remembered also the lion and the bear, when he went to fight
with the giant of _Gath_. 1 Sam. xvii. 36, 37.
It was _Paul’s_ accustomed manner, Acts xxii., and that, when tried for
his life, Acts xxiv., even to open before his judges the manner of his
conversion: he would think of that day, and that hour, in which he first
did meet with grace; for he found it supported him. When God had brought
the children of Israel out of the Red Sea, far into the wilderness, yet
they must turn quite about thither again, to remember the drowning of
their enemies there, Numb. xiv. 25, for though they sang his praise
before, yet they soon forgat his works. Psalm cvi. 11, 12.
In this discourse of mine, you may see much; much I say, of the grace of
God towards me: I thank God, I can count it much; for it was above my
sins and Satan’s temptations too. I can remember my fears and doubts,
and sad months, with comfort; they are as the head of _Goliah_ in my
hand: there was nothing to _David_ like _Goliah’s_ sword, even that sword
that should have been sheathed in his bowels; for the very sight and
remembrance of that did preach forth God’s deliverance to him. Oh! the
remembrance of my great sins, of my great temptations, and of my great
fear of perishing for ever! They bring afresh into my mind, the
remembrance of my great help, my great supports from heaven, and the
great grace that God extended to such a wretch as I.
My dear children, call to mind the former days, and years of ancient
times: remember also your songs in the night, and commune with your own
Hearts, Ps. lxxiii. 5–12. Yea, look diligently, and leave no corner
therein unsearched for that treasure hid, even the treasure of your first
and second experience of the grace of God towards you. Remember, I say,
the word that first laid hold upon you: remember your terrors of
conscience, and fear of death and hell: remember also your tears and
prayers to God; yea, how you sighed under every hedge for mercy. Have
you never a hill _Mizar_ to remember? Have you forgot the close, the
milk-house, the stable, the barn, and the like, where God did visit your
souls? Remember also the word, the word, I say, upon which the Lord hath
caused you to hope: if you have sinned against light, if you are tempted
to blaspheme, if you are drowned in despair, if you think God fights
against you, or if heaven is hid from your eyes; remember it was thus
with your father; _but out of them all the Lord delivered me_.
I could have enlarged much in this my discourse, of my temptations and
troubles for sin; as also of the merciful kindness and working of God
with my soul: I could also have stepped into a style much higher than
this, in which I have here discoursed, and could have adorned all things
more than here I have seemed to do, but I dare not: God did not play in
tempting of me; neither did I play, when I sunk as into the bottomless
pit, when the _pangs of hell caught hold upon me_; wherefore I may not
play in relating of them, but be plain and simple, and lay down the thing
as it was; he that liketh it, let him receive it, and he that doth not,
let him produce a better. Farewell.
My dear Children,
_The milk and honey are beyond this wilderness_. _God be merciful to
you_, _and grant that you be not slothful to go in to possess the land_.