_The history of Selim's travels._
Mangogul, whose thoughts ran solely on diversifying his pleasures, and
multiplying the trials of his ring; after having interrogated the most
interesting Toys of the court, had the curiosity to hear some of the
city Toys. But as he had no advantageous opinion of what his should
learn from them, he would willingly consult them at his ease, and save
himself the trouble of going to find them out.
How to bring them to him, was what embarassed him. "You are in great
pain for a trifle," says Mirzoza. "Sir, you have only to give a
ball, and I promise you this very night a greater number of those
speech-makers than you will covet to hear."
"My heart's joy, you say right," replied Mangogul; "and your
contrivance is the better still, because we shall certainly have
none but those whom we have occasion for." In a moment an order was
dispatch'd to the Kislar-Agasi, and the master of the revels, to
prepare the ball, and to distribute no more than four thousand tickets.
They were probably better judges in that country than elsewhere, of the
room that six thousand persons would take up.
To amuse themselves till the hour of the ball, Selim, Mangogul, and
the favorite set about telling news. "Does madam know," says Selim to
the favorite, "that poor Codindo is dead?" "This is the first word
I heard of it, but what did he the of?" says the favorite. "Alas,
madam," answered Selim, "he fell a victim to attraction. He filled his
head with this system in his youth, and it turn'd his brain in his old
days." "How so?" says the favorite.
"He had found," continued Selim, "by the methods of Halley and Circino,
two celebrated astronomers of Monoémugi, that a certain comet, which
made so much noise towards the end of Kanaglou's reign, was to return
the day before yesterday; and fearing lest it might double its steps,
and he should not have the happiness of being the first to see it; he
resolved to spend the night in his observatory, and yesterday morning
at nine o'clock he had still his eye clung to the telescope.
"His son apprehending the consequences of so long a sitting, went to
him at eight, pull'd him by the sleeve, and called him several times:
_Father, Father_. Not a word of answer. _Father, Father,_ repeated the
young Codindo. 'It is just going to appear,' replied Codindo: 'it will
appear; zounds! I shall see it.' 'But you do not consider, dear father,
that there is a dismal fog'----'I must see it, I will see it, I tell
thee.'
"The young man, convinced by these answers, that the fog had got into
his father's head, called out for help. The family ran to him, and sent
for Farfadi; and I was with him (for he is my physician) when Codindo's
servant came.----'Quick, quick, Sir, make haste, old Codindo, my
master'----'Well, what is the matter, Champagne? What has befallen your
master?'----'Sir, he is run mad.'----'Thy master is run mad'----'Oh!
yes, Sir. He cries out that he must see beasts, that he will see
beasts; that they will come. The apothecary is with him already, and
they wait for you. Come quickly.'----'_Maniacal_,' says Farfadi,
putting on his gown, and hunting for his square-cap; '_Maniacal_, a
terrible maniacal fit.' Then turning to the servant, he ask'd: 'Does
not thy master see butterflies? Does he not pick the ends of his
coverlid?'----'Oh! no, Sir,' replied Champagne. 'The poor man is on the
top of his observatory, where his wife, daughters and son have much ado
to hold him. Come quickly, you will find your square-cap to-morrow.'
"Codindo's disease seemed to me to be of an odd kind: I took Farfadi in
my coach, and we drove to the observatory. At the bottom of the stairs
we heard Codindo crying out in a furious tone: 'I must see the comet, I
will see it: withdraw ye rascals and jades.'
"In all probability his family, finding that they could not prevail
on him to go down to his bed-chamber, had ordered his bed up to him:
for we found him lying in bed at the top of his observatory. An
apothecary of the neighbourhood, and the Bramin of the parish had been
called before we arrived. The latter was trumpeting into his ear:
'Brother, dear brother, your salvation is at stake: you cannot with
a safe conscience expect a comet at this hour of the day: you damn
yourself.'----'That is my business,' said Codindo. 'What answer will
you give to Brama, before whom you are going to appear?' replied the
Bramin.----'Mr. Rector,' says Codindo, without stirring his eye from
the telescope, 'my answer shall be, that it is your trade to exhort me
for my money, and the apothecary's there, to extol his warm water to
me; that the physician does his duty of feeling my pulse, and learning
nothing from it; and I my own, of waiting for the comet.'----In vain
did they teize him, they drew nothing more from him: he continued to
observe with heroic courage; and he died on the leads, his left hand
on his eye of that side, his right laid on the tube of the telescope,
and his right eye applied close to the eye-glass; between his son, who
cried that he made a false calculation; his apothecary, who proposed
him a clyster, his physician, who with a toss of his head pronounced,
that there was nothing more to be done; and his priest, who said to
him: 'brother, make an act of contrition, and recommend yourself to
Brama.----'"
"That is," says Mangogul, "what they call dying in the bed of honour."
"Let us leave poor Codindo," added the favorite, "to rest in peace, and
pass to some more agreeable subject." Then addressing herself to Selim,
"my lord," says she, "as you are so gallant at this time of life, have
so much wit, talents, and so good a mien, and lived in a court devoted
to pleasures; it is no wonder if the Toys have formerly celebrated your
fame. But yet I suspect that they have not told all they knew of you. I
do not require this supplement: you may have good reasons for refusing
it. But after all the adventures, with which this gentry have honoured
you, you ought to know womankind: and this is one of those things of
no consequence, which you may safely own."
"This compliment, madam," replied Selim, "would have flattered my
self-love at the age of twenty: but I have gained some experience,
and one of my first reflections is, that the more one practises this
business, the less knowledge he obtains. I, to know women! that I have
studied them much, may be allowed." "Well, what do you think of them?"
said the favorite. "Madam," answered Selim, "whatsoever their Toys
might have published concerning them, I esteem the whole sex as most
respectable."
"Indeed, my friend," says the Sultan, "you deserve to be a Toy; you
would have no occasion for a muzzle." "Selim," added the Sultana,
"abandon the satyrical strain, and speak the truth." "Madam," replied
the courtier, "I may possibly mix some disagreeable strokes with my
narrative: do not impose the task on me of offending a sex, which has
always used me well enough, and which I revere by"----"What, always
veneration! I know nothing so caustic as those sweet-tongued folks,
when they set on," intermitted Mirzoza; and imagining that it was
through regard for her that Selim excused himself, "Let not my presence
restrain you," added she: "we are contriving to amuse ourselves; and
I promise upon my honour to apply to myself all the obliging things
you shall say of my sex, and to leave the rest to other women. Well,
you have studied women much? Pray, give us an account of the course of
your studies: it must have been very brilliant, if I may judge of it
by what is known of the success: and it is reasonable to presume, that
this will not be contradicted by what is unknown." The old courtier
complied with her desire, and began thus.
"The Toys, I own, have talked a good deal of me: but they have not told
all. Those who were capable of completing my history, either are no
more, or are not in our climate: and those who have begun it, have but
lightly touched the subject. I have hitherto inviolably kept the secret
which I had promised them; although I was better made to speak than
they: but since they have broke silence, I think they have dispensed me
from the obligation of keeping it.
"Born with a fiery constitution, I loved almost as soon as I knew what
a beautiful woman was. I had governants which I detested; but in return
I was much pleased with my mother's waiting-women. They were for the
most part young and pretty: they conversed, dressed, and undressed
before me without ceremony; they have even enticed me to take liberties
with them, and my temper naturally inclining to gallantry, turned every
thing to advantage. With these elements of instruction, at five or six
years of age I was put under the care of men; and God knows how forward
I was in improving them, when the ancient authors were put into my
hands, and my tutors explained certain passages, of which possibly they
themselves did not penetrate into the sense. My father's pages taught
me some pretty college tricks: and the perusal of _Aloysia_, which they
lent me, gave me a vehement desire of becoming perfect. I was then
fourteen years of age.
"I cast my eyes around, seeking among the women who frequented the
house, one to whom I might make my addresses: but they all appeared
equally proper to ease me of my irksome load of innocence. A commenced
acquaintance, and still more the courage I felt to attack a person of
my own age, and which failed me with regard to others, determined my
choice in favor of one of my cousins. Emilia was young, and so was
I: I thought her pretty, and she liked me: she was not difficult,
and I was enterprizing: I had a mind to learn, and she was not less
curious to know. We frequently asked one another very frank and strong
questions: and one day she deceived the vigilance of her governants,
and we instructed each other. Ah! how great a master is nature! it soon
set us in the high road of pleasure, and we abandoned ourselves to
its impulse, without the least thought of the consequences: and this
was not the way to prevent them. Emilia had indispositions, which
she took the less pains to hide, as she did not suspect the cause.
Her mother examined her, extorted a confession of our commerce, and
my father was informed of it. He made me some reprimands blended with
an air of satisfaction; and it was immediately resolved that I should
travel. I set out with a governor, who was charged to watch my conduct
attentively, but not to put me under any restraint: and five months
after, the gazette informed me, that Emilia died of the small pox;
and a letter from my father, that her tenderness for me had cost her
her life. The first fruit of my love serves with distinction in the
Sultan's army: I have always supported him by my credit, and to this
day he knows me solely as his protector.
"We were at Tunis, when I received the news of his birth and his
mother's death. Her fate touched me to the quick, and I believe I
should have been inconsolable, had I not embarked in an intrigue with a
sea-captain's wife, who did not afford me time to run into despair. The
Tunetine was intrepid, and I was fool-hardy: for with the assistance
of a rope-ladder, which she threw to me, I passed every night from my
lodging on her terrass, and thence into a closet, where she put the
finishing hand to my instructions; Emilia having only made a beginning.
Her husband return'd from a cruize, just at the time, that my governor,
who had received his instructions, urged me to cross over into Europe.
I embarked on board a vessel bound for Lisbon, but not without several
times taking leave of Elvira, from whom I received this diamond.
"The vessel, in which we sailed, was laden with merchandise; but the
most valuable commodity on board, to my taste, was the captain's
wife. She was not quite twenty: and her husband was as jealous of her
as a tyger, and not quite without cause. We all soon understood one
another: Donna Velina perceived that I had a liking for her; I, that
I was not indifferent to her; and her husband, that he incommoded us.
The sailor resolved not to lose sight of us till we were landed at
Lisbon. I read in the eyes of his dear wife, how much she fretted at
her husband's assiduity: mine testified the same things to her, and
the husband understood us wonderfully well. We spent two whole days in
an inconceivable thirst of pleasure; which would certainly have kill'd
us, had not heaven assisted us: but it always assists souls in pain.
Just upon our passing the Streights of Gibraltar, a furious tempest
arose. I would not fail, madam, to raise the winds about your ears, and
make thunder rattle over your head; to set the heavens on fire with
lightning; raise the billows up to the clouds, and describe the most
horrid tempest which you have ever met with in any romance; were I
not giving you a history. I shall only tell you, that the captain was
compelled by the sailors cries to quit his room, and expose himself
to one danger for fear of another. He went up on deck together with
my governor, and I threw myself without hesitation into the arms of
my fair Portuguese; quite forgetting that there was any such thing in
nature as a sea, storms, or tempests; that we were on board a tottering
vessel; and abandoning myself without reserve to the perfidious
element. Our course was rapid, and you may well judge, madam, by the
weather at that time, that I saw a great deal of land in a few hours.
We put in at Cadiz, where I left a promise with the Signora to meet her
at Lisbon, if my Mentor agreed to it, whose design was to go directly
to Madrid.
"The Spanish women are more closely confined, and more amorous than
ours. Love is managed in that country by a sort of ambassadresses,
who have orders to catechize strangers, to make proposals to them, to
conduct them forward and backward; and the ladies undertake the task
of making them happy. I was not obliged to go through this ceremony,
thanks to the conjuncture. A great revolution had lately placed a
prince of the blood royal of France on the throne of this kingdom: his
arrival and coronation occasioned festivals at the court, where I then
appeared. I was accosted at a masquerade; and a meeting was proposed
me for the next day: I accepted the challenge, and went into a little
house, where I found only one man mask'd, his nose wrapp'd in his
cloak, who delivered me a letter, in which Donna Oropeza put off the
party to the next day at the same hour. I returned, and was introduced
into an appartment sumptuously furnish'd, and well illuminated with
wax tapers. My goddess did not make me wait long. She enter'd just at
my heels, and rush'd into my arms without speaking a word, or taking
off her mask. Was she ugly? Was she handsome? was what I knew not. I
only perceived on the couch, to which she drew me, that she was young,
well-made, and loved pleasure. When she found herself satisfied with
my panegyricks, she unmask'd, and shewed me the original of this
picture, which you see in my snuff-box."
Selim open'd, and at the same time presented the favorite with a gold
box, of exquisite work, and richly adorn'd with jewels. "The present
is gallant," says Mangogul: "what I esteem most in it," added the
favorite, "is the portrait. What eyes! What a mouth! what a neck!
But is not all this hightened?" "So little, madam," replied Selim,
"that Oropeza would probably have fixed me at Madrid, if her husband,
informed of our commerce, had not disturbed it by his threats. I loved
Oropeza, but I loved life better still. Besides, my governor was not of
opinion, that I should expose myself to be poniarded by the husband,
for the sake of enjoying his wife some few months more. Wherefore I
wrote to the fair Spanish Donna a very moving farewel letter, which I
stole out of some romance of that country, and set out for France.
"The monarch, who then reigned in France, was the king of Spain's
grandfather, and his court was justly esteemed the most magnificent,
most polite, and most gallant in Europe. I appeared there as a
phænomenon. 'A young lord of Congo,' says a beautiful marquise. 'That
must be surely very diverting: those men are better then ours. I think
Congo is not far from Morocco.' Suppers were given, to which I was
invited. Let my discourse have ever so little sense in it, it was found
fine, admirable: people retracted, who had at first done me the honour
to suspect that I had not common sense. 'He is a charming man,' says
another court lady briskly: 'it would be murther to suffer so pretty a
figure to return into a wretched country, where the women are narrowly
watched by men who are no longer so. Is it true, sir? 'Tis said, that
they have nothing. That is very unseemly in a man.'----'But,' adds
another, 'we must keep this great boy here, (for he is well born) tho'
he were only made a knight of Malta. I engage, if you will, to procure
him an employment; and the dutchess Victoria, my old friend, will speak
to the king in his favor, if it be requisite.'
"I soon had indubitable proofs of their good-will, and I put the
marquise into a condition of pronouncing on the merit of the
inhabitants of Morocco and Congo. I found that the employment, which
the dutchess and her friend had promised me, was difficult to execute,
and therefore gave it up. It was in this recess that I learned to
form those noble passions of twenty-four hours. I circulated during
six months in a vortex, where the beginning of an adventure did not
wait for the end of another; because enjoyment was the only thing
intended. Or if that was slow in coming, or as soon as it was obtained,
we ran upon the scent of new pleasures." "What do you tell me,
Selim?" interrupted the favorite. "Decency is then unknown in those
countries?" "Pardon me, madam," replied the old courtier. "They have
scarcely any other word in their mouths. But the French women are no
more slaves to the thing than their neighbors." "What neighbors?"
says Mirzoza. "The English women," replied Selim, "who are cold and
scornful in appearance, but passionate, voluptuous, vindictive; less
witty and more rational than the French women. These love the jargon
of sentiment, those prefer the expression of pleasure. But at London
as at Paris, people love, separate, rejoin to separate again. From
the daughter of a lord bishop (these are a sort of Bramins who do
not keep celibacy) I passed to a baronet's wife. While he was warmly
supporting the interest of the nation in the house of commons, against
the attempts of the court; his wife and I had quite different debates
in his house. But the session was closed, and madam was obliged to
attend her knight to his manor. I then light upon a colonel's wife,
whose regiment was quartered along the sea-coast: I afterwards belong'd
to the lady mayoress. Ah, what a woman! I should never have seen Congo
again, if the prudence of my governor, who saw me wasting away, had
not redeemed me from this gally. He counterfeited letters from my
family, which recalled me with all possible expedition, and we embarked
for Holland: our design was to travel through Germany into Italy, where
we expected frequent opportunities of vessels to carry us to Afric.
"We saw Holland only in riding post; and did not tarry much longer in
Germany. All the women of rank there resemble important citadels, which
must be besieged in form. They are to be reduced, but the approaches
require so many measures, there are so many _ifs_ and _buts_, when the
articles of capitulation are to be settled, that those conquests soon
tired me.
"I shall never forget the expression of a German lady of the first
quality, on the subject of granting me what she had not refused to
several others. 'Alas!' cried she mournfully, 'what would my father
the great Alkizi say, if he knew that I abandon myself to such a low
creature as a Congese.' 'He shall say nothing, madam,' replied I: 'so
much grandeur affrights me, and I withdraw.' It was wisely done of
me; for if my mediocrity had compromised with her highness, I might
have repented it. Brama, who protects the wholesome climes, which we
inhabit, inspired me without doubt in this critical moment.
"The Italian ladies, whom we frequented afterwards, are not mounted on
so high a pin. It was with them that I learned the modes of pleasure.
There is indeed much caprice and whim in those refinements; but you
will pardon me, ladies, if I say, that sometimes there is no pleasing
you without them. From Venice and Rome I brought some merry receipts
before my time unknown in our barbarous country. But I restore all the
glory of them to the Italian women, who communicated them to me.
"I spent about four years in Europe, and returned through Egypt into
this empire, modelled as you see, and stock'd with the rare secrets of
Italy, which I soon divulged."
Here, says the African author, Selim perceiving that the common place
language, which he held to the favorite on his adventures in Europe,
and on the characters of the women of the countries through which he
passed, had plunged Mangogul into a deep sleep, was afraid of awaking
him; and therefore drew near to the favorite, and continued in a lower
voice.
"Madam," said he, "were I not apprehensive that I have tired you by
a narrative, which has perhaps been already too long; I would relate
you the adventure, by which I commenced my operations on my arrival at
Paris: I cannot think how it has escaped me."
"Tell it, my good friend," answered the favorite; "I will double my
attention, and make amends, as much as I am able, for the Sultan's
inattention, who sleeps."
"At Madrid," continued Selim, "we had taken recommendations for some
lords of the court of France, and at our setting foot in Paris we
found ourselves loaded with protestations of friendship. It was then
the pleasant season of the year, and in the evenings my governor and I
went to walk in the gardens of the Palais Royal. One day we were joined
there by some _Petits-Maitres_, who shewed us the most celebrated
beauties, and gave us their history, true, or false, not forgetting
themselves on every occasion, as you may well imagine. The garden
was already stock'd by a great number of women; but there arrived a
considerable reinforcement about eight o'clock. By the quantity of
their jewels, the magnificence of their dress, and the crowd of their
attendants, I took them for dutchesses at least. I spoke my thoughts to
one of the young lords of the company, whose answer was, that he found
I was a connoisseur; and if I was inclined, I should have the pleasure
of supping that very night with some of the most lovely of them. I
accepted his offer, and in an instant he slipt a word into the ears of
two or three of his friends, who dispersed themselves into different
parts of the walks, and in less than a quarter of an hour returned to
give us an account of their negotiation. 'Gentlemen,' said they to
us, 'you are expected this night to supper at the dutchess Asteria's.'
Those who were not of the party, congratulated us on our good fortune:
and after some turns in the gardens, they left us, and we went into our
coach, in order to reap the benefit of it.
"We alight at a little door, at the foot of a very narrow pair of
stairs, where we climbed up to a second floor; and I found the
appartments more spacious and better furnished than they would appear
to me at present. I was presented to the mistress of the house, to whom
I made one of the most profound reverences, which I accompanied with
so respectuous a compliment, that she was almost unhinged. Supper was
served up, and I was seated next to a little charming person, who fell
to acting the dutchess to admiration. Truly I can't tell how I dared
to fall in love with her: but so it was."
"Then you have loved once in your life," interrupted the favorite.
"Oh! yes, madam," replied Selim, "as people love at eighteen years of
age, with extreme impatience to conclude an affair just broach'd. I
had not a wink of sleep all that night, and at dawn of day I set about
composing a most gallant letter to my _Belle_. I sent it, received an
answer, and obtained a meeting. Neither the style of the answer, nor
the yielding temper of the lady, did undeceive me; and I flew to the
place of assignation, strongly perswaded that I was going to enjoy the
wife or daughter of a prime minister. My goddess was waiting for me on
a grand couch: I threw myself at her feet, took her hand, kissed it
with uncommon eagerness, and felicitated myself on the favor which she
condescended to grant me. 'Is it true,' said I, 'that you permit Selim
to love you, and to tell you so; and that he may, without offending
you, flatter himself with the sweetest hope?' On ending these words, I
snatch'd a kiss from her neck; and as she was recumbent I was preparing
to support the attack with vigor, when she stop'd me, and said: 'Hold,
my friend, you are a pretty lad, you have wit at will, you talk like
an angel; but I must have four _Louis d'or's_.' 'What do you say,'
interrupted I.----'I tell you,' replied she, 'there is nothing to be
done, if you have not brought four _Louis_'----'How, miss,' said I
quite amazed, 'is that your full value? It was well worth my while, to
be sure, to come from Congo for such a trifle.' And in a moment I put
myself in order, hurried down stairs, and left her.
"I began, madam, as you see, to mistake actresses for princesses." "I
am quite astonished at it," replied Mirzoza, "surely the difference
is very great." "I doubt not," said Selim, "but they were guilty of a
hundred impertinences. But what then? A young man, and a stranger too,
is not so nice an observer. And I had heard so many bad stories in
Congo, on the liberties taken by the European women.----"
Here Mangogul awak'd, and yawning and rubbing his eyes, said: "By the
L--d, he is still at Paris. Might one ask you, good Mr. Story-teller,
when you expect to be return'd to Banza, and how long I am doomed to
sleep: for 'tis proper you should know, my friend, that it is not
possible to broach an account of travels without throwing me into
yawnings. It is a bad habit, which I contracted in reading Tavernier
and other travellers."
"Prince," answered Selim, "it is above an hour since I am come back to
Banza."
"I congratulate you thereupon," replied the Sultan; and then turning to
the Sultana, "madam," said he, "the hour appointed for the masquerade
is come: we will set out, if the fatigue of the journey permits you."
"Prince," answered Mirzoza, "I am ready." Mangogul and Selim slipt on
their Domino's, and the favorite took hers likewise: the Sultan handed
her to the ball-room where they separated, in order to mix in the
crowd. Selim followed them, "and so did I," says the African author;
"tho' I had a stronger inclination to take a nap than to see the
dancing."