_Twenty-third Trial of the Ring._
Fannia.
There still remain'd a good part of the day, when this conversation was
closed: which determined Mangogul to make one trial of his ring, before
he retired to his appartment; tho' it were purely to fall asleep on
more chearful idea's than those which had hitherto employ'd him. He
went directly to Fannia's house; but found her not. He return'd thither
after supper; she was still absent. Wherefore he put off his experiment
to the next morning.
Mangogul, says the African author, whose Journal we translate, was at
Fannia's house by half an hour after nine this morning. She was but
just put to bed. The Sultan drew near her pillow, view'd her for some
time, and could not conceive how, with so few charms, she had run
through so many adventures.
Fannia is fair even to insipidity, tall, ungainly, with an indecent
gait, no features, few _Agrémens_, and an air of intrepidity,
intolerable any where but at court. As for wit, she is allowed to have
just as much as gallantry can communicate: and a woman must be born
very weak, if she has not acquired a stock of jargon after a score of
intrigues; for Fannia was advanced thus far.
At this time she was possessed by a man suited to her character. He
gave himself little or no concern about her infidelities; tho' indeed
he was not as well informed as the public, how far she carried them.
He had taken Fannia by caprice, and kept her by habit; like a piece of
furniture. They had spent the night at the ball, went to bed at nine,
and fell asleep without ceremony. Alonzo's indifference would not have
suited Fannia, were it not for her easy humour. Thus our couple were
sleeping soundly back to back, when the Sultan turn'd his ring on
Fannia's Toy. It instantly began to speak, its mistress to snoar, and
Alonzo to awake.
After yawning several times; "this is not Alonzo, what's o'clock, who
wants me? your business," said the Toy. "I think I have not been long
in bed, let me take another nap."
The Toy was preparing to compose itself to rest accordingly; but that
was not the Sultan's intention. "What persecution," resumed the Toy.
"Once more who wants me, and for what? 'tis a misfortune to be born of
illustrious ancestors: how unhappy is the condition of a titled Toy! if
any thing could console me for the fatigues of my state, it would be
the goodness of the nobleman, whose property I am. Oh! he is certainly
the best man in the world in that regard. He has never given us the
least uneasiness: and in return we have made great use of the liberty
he granted us. What would have become of me, great Brama, if I had
fallen to the share of one of those insipid wretches, who are always
upon the watch? what a fine life we should have led!"
Here the Toy added some words, which Mangogul understood not, and then
with surprising rapidity fell to sketching out a crowd of heroic,
comic, burlesque, and tragicomic adventures: and it was almost out of
breath, when it continued in these terms. "You see I have some memory.
But I am like all others; I have retained but the smallest part of what
I have been intrusted with. Be satisfied therefore with what I have
related to you, I can recollect no more at present."
"'Tis pretty well," said Mangogul within himself; but still he urged
afresh. "Lud, how teizing you are," resumed the Toy: "As if one had
nothing better to do than to prate. Come then, since it must be so, let
us prate on: perhaps when I have told all, I shall be permitted to do
something else.
"My Mistress Fannia," continued the Toy, "thro' an inconceivable spirit
of retirement, quitted the court, to shut her self up in her house at
Banza. It was then the beginning of autumn, and every body was out
of town. And if you ask me what she did there; Faith, I can't tell.
But Fannia never did but one thing; and if she had been employ'd that
way, I should have known it. Probably she was out of work: true, I now
recollect, we spent a day and a half in perfect idleness, which threw
us into a cruel fit of the vapors.
"I was heart-sick of this sort of life, when Amisadar was so good to
relieve us from it.---'Ah! you are there, my poor Amisadar, indeed you
give me great pleasure. You come to me very opportunely.'----'And who
knew that you were at Banza?' replied Amisadar.--'No body truly; and
neither you nor any one else will ever imagine what brought me hither.
Don't you guess at the cause?'----'No, really, I cannot comprehend
it.'--'Not at all?'--'No, not at all.'--'Well then know, my dear,
that I resolved to be converted'--'You, to be converted?'----'Yes,
I'----'Look on me a little: but you are as charming as ever, and
I see nothing in that countenance that bespeaks conversion. This
is all pleasantry'----'No, faith, I am serious. I am determined to
renounce the world. I am tired of it'----'This is a whim, that will
soon fly off. Let me die, if ever you run into devotion'----'I
will, I tell you: there is no sincerity in man'----'Pray has Mazul
fail'd you?'----'I have not seen him this age.'----'Then it must
be Zumpholo?'----'Less still, I have ceased seeing him, I can't
tell how, without thinking about it.'----'Ah! I have it, 'tis young
Imola?'--'Good, who can fix such fribbles?'--'What is it then?'----'I
can't tell, I am angry with the whole earth?'----'Ah! Madam, you are in
the wrong; for this earth, at which you are angry, might furnish you
wherewithal to repair your losses.'----'Then, Amisadar, you sincerely
believe that there are still some good souls, who have escaped from
the corruption of the age, and are capable of love?'----'How, love!
Is it possible that you give into those pitiful notions? you expect
to be loved, you?'----'And why not?'----'But reflect, madam, that a
man who loves, pretends to be loved, and alone too. You have too much
good sense, to enslave your self to the jealousies and caprices of a
tender and faithful lover. Nothing so fatiguing as these folks. To
see but them, to love but them, to dream of none but them, to have
no wit, humour, or charms but for them; all this most certainly does
not suit you. It would be pleasant to see you stive yourself up in,
what is called, the noble passion, and give your self all the awkward
airs of a little female cit.' 'Well, Amisadar, you seem to be in the
right. I verily think it would ill become us to run into fawning love.
Let us change then, since it must be so. Besides, I do not see, that
those loving women, whom they set us as models, are happier than
others'----'Who told you so, madam?'----'No body, but it is easily
foreseen.'----'Trust not to such foresight? A loving woman constitutes
her own, and her lover's happiness: but this part is not suited to all
women.'----'Faith, my dear, it is suited to none: for all, who attempt
it, are sufferers. What advantage is there in fixing to one?'----'A
thousand, a woman, who fixes her affections, will preserve her
reputation; will be sovereignly esteemed by the man she loves; and you
cannot imagine, how much love owes to esteem.'----'I do not comprehend
your meaning, you make a jumble of reputation, love, esteem, and I
can't tell what besides. Would you be understood, that inconstancy must
dishonour a woman? How, I take a man, and find he does not answer
my expectations: I take another, and am still disappointed: I change
him for a third, who does not turn out a jot better: and because I
have had the misfortune to make a score of wrong choices, instead of
pitying me, you would'----'I would, madam, advise a woman who has been
deceived in her first choice, not to make a second; for fear of being
deceived again, and running from one error into another.'----'Good
God, what strange morality! I fancy, my dear, that you preached me a
quite different sort just now. Might one be informed what sort of woman
would hit your taste?'----'Most willingly, madam but 'tis late, and the
discourse would run into too great a length.'----'So much the better: I
am alone, and you will be company for me. Thus the affair is settled,
is it not? Seat yourself on this couch, and go on: I shall hear you
more at ease.'
"Amisadar obey'd, and sate down by Fannia. 'That mantelet of yours,
madam,' says he, leaning towards her, and uncovering her bosom, 'wraps
you up strangely.'--'You say right.'----'Why then do you hide such
beautiful things?' added he, kissing them.----'Come, ha' done. Do
you know that you are mad? You are become intolerably impudent. Mr.
Moralist, resume the conversation which you began.'
"'Well then,' said Amisadar, 'I would be glad to find in my mistress
a good figure, good sense, good sentiments, and decency above all. I
would have her approve my attendance; not deceive me by looks; make
me thoroughly sensible, once at least, that I am agreeable to her;
and even inform me how I may become still more so; not conceal from
me the progress I make in her heart; give ear to none but me, have
no eyes but for me; neither think, nor even dream, but of me; love
but me; busy herself about nothing but me; do nothing but what may
tend to convince me of all this: and at length yielding herself up
to my transports, let me plainly perceive that I owe every thing to
my love and to hers. Oh, what a triumph, madam! And how happy is the
man who possesses such a woman!'----'Alas, my poor Amisadar, you are
certainly out of your senses. You have drawn the portrait of woman
who does not exist.'----'Pardon me, madam, there are some in being. I
own that they are rare; but yet I have had the good fortune to light
of one. Alas! If death had not snatch'd her from me, for 'tis death
alone that ever robs one of such women, perhaps I should be in her
arms at present'----'But how then did you behave with her?'--'I loved
to distraction, and miss'd no opportunity of giving her proofs of my
passion. I had the sweet satisfaction of seeing that they were well
received. I was scrupulously faithful to her, and she to me. The only
disputes between us were, whose love was strongest; and in these little
debates it was, that we laid our hearts open. We were never so fond
as after this scrutiny of our souls. Our caresses always became more
tender and vigorous after our explanations. Oh! what love and truth
were then in our looks! I read in her eyes, and she in mine, that we
burned with equal and mutual ardor.'----'And whither did all this lead
ye?'----'To pleasures unknown to all mortals less amorous and sincere
than us.'----'You enjoyed?'----'Yes I enjoyed, but a good on which
I set an infinite value. If esteem does not intoxicate, at least it
hightens the intoxication considerably. We unbosom'd ourselves without
reserve, and you can't imagine how much it strengthened our passion.
The more I examined, the more perfections I discovered, and the greater
were my transports. I spent half my time at her feet, and I regretted
the loss of the rest. I made her happiness, and she filled up the
measure of mine. I always saw her with pleasure, and always quitted
her with pain. Thus we lived together: and now, madam, you may judge
if loving women are so much to be pitied'----'No they are not, if what
you tell me be true; but I can scarcely believe it. There is no such
love as you describe. Nay, I imagine, that such a passion as you have
felt, must make a man purchase the pleasures it affords at the expence
of great uneasinesses.'----'I had some, madam, but I was fond of them.
I felt some twitches of jealousy. The least alteration which I remarked
in her countenance, spread the alarm all over my soul.'----'What
extravagance! Upon mature consideration, I conclude that it is better
to love in the present fashionable way; to take a lover at one's ease,
keep to him while he amuses, quit him when he becomes tiresome, or
that our fancy speaks for another. Inconstancy affords a variety of
pleasures unknown to you languishing folks.'----'I grant that that
method may be proper enough for little kept mistresses and common
women; but does not suit with a man of tenderness and delicacy.
At most it may amuse him, when his heart is disengaged, and he is
willing to make comparisons. In a word, a woman of gallantry is by
no means of my taste.'----'You are in the right, my dear Amisadar,
you have a ravishing way of thinking. But do you love any thing at
present?'----'Nothing, madam, but yourself; and I dare not tell you so
neither.'----'Ah! my dear, dare on: you may continue,' replied Fannia,
gazing on him stedfastly.
"Amisadar understood this reply thoroughly well, moved forward on the
couch, fell to playing with a ribbon, which hung down on Fannia's
breast, and he was not interrupted. His hand, meeting with no
obstacle, slipt down lower. She continued to fire him with glances,
which he did not misinterpret. For my part," says the Toy, "I found,
he was a sensible man. He took a kiss on that neck, on which he had
bestowed so many encomiums. He was desired to stop, but in such a
tone as plainly shewed that she would take it ill, if he obeyed; and
accordingly he did not. He kissed her hands, returned to her neck,
passed to her mouth: nothing resisted him. Insensibly Fannia's leg
was on Amisadar's thighs. He put his hand on it: it was soft, and
Amisadar did not fail to remark it. His elogy was heard with an air of
distraction. By favor of this inattention, Amisadar's hand advanced,
and with rapidity reached her knees. The absence of mind still
continued; and Amisadar was preparing for the charge, when Fannia came
to herself. She accused the little philosopher of want of respect; but
he became so absent in his turn, that he did not hear one word, or at
least made no other answer to the reproaches she threw on him, but by
compleating his happiness.
"What a charming man he appear'd to me! Of the multitude of those, who
preceded and followed him, not one was ever so much to my taste. I
cannot mention him without panting. Pray suffer me to recover breath!
I think I have spoken a pretty sufficient time, considering it is my
first speech."
Alonzo did not lose one single Word of Fannia's Toy; and he was
no less impatient than Mangogul to hear the remaining part of the
adventure: but neither of them had time to be out of patience, when the
tale-telling Toy resumed in these words.
"All that I can comprehend after serious consideration, is, that in
some few days Amisadar went to the country, that he was asked the
reason of his stay in town, and that he related his adventure with my
mistress. For somebody of Amisadar's and her acquaintance, passing by
our door, enquired either by chance or design, if madam was at home,
sent in his name, and went up.----'Ah! madam, who could imagine you
were in Banza? and how long are you here?'----'An age, my dear, this
fortnight, that I have renounced society.' 'May I presume to ask,
madam, upon what account?'----'Alas! because I was tired of it. Women
are become such strange libertines, that there is no bearing them. One
must either do as they do, or pass for a silly creature; and sincerely,
I think both extremes should be avoided.'----'Indeed, madam, you are
become quite edifying. Pray, is it the conversation of the Bramin
Brelibibi, that has wrought your conversion?'----'No, 'tis a squall of
philosophy, 'tis a quint of devotion. It seized me suddenly; and it
is not poor Amisadar's fault that I am not at present practising the
highest austerity.'----'Then madam has seen him lately?'----'Yes, once
or twice.'----'And you have seen no body else.'----'No, truly. He is
the only thinking, reasoning, active being, that has entered my doors
during the eternity of my retreat.'----'That is singular'----'And what
singularity is there in it?'----'Nothing but an adventure which he
had the other day with a lady of Banza, alone like you, devout like
you, retired from the world like you. But I must tell you the story:
perhaps it will amuse you.'----'Without doubt,' replied Fannia: and
immediately Amisadar's friend set about relating his adventure word
for word, as I have done," says the Toy: "and when he was advanced as
far as I am now.----'Well, madam,' said he, 'what do you think? Is not
Amisadar a lucky man?'----'But,' answered Fannia, 'Amisadar is a lier
perhaps: do you imagine that there are women so daring as to abandon
themselves without shame?'----'But consider, madam,' replied Maruspha,
'that Amisadar has named no body, and it is very improbable that he has
imposed'----'I begin to see thro' the affair,' says Fannia: 'Amisadar
has wit, and is a handsome man, he has, to be sure, infused some
notions of sensual pleasure sure into this poor recluse, which have
mastered her. Yes, this must be it: this sort of folks are dangerous
to hear, and Amisadar is matchless in that way.'----'How, madam,'
interrupted Marsupha, 'is Amisadar the only man that has the art of
perswading, and will you not do justice to others, who deserve, as much
as he, a share in your esteem?---'Pray, whom do you mean?'----'Myself,
madam, who think you a charming woman, and'----'I fancy you joke. Look
at me then, Marsupha. I have neither paint nor patches. My night-cap
does not become me. I make a frightful figure.'----'You are mistaken,
madam: that undress sets you off surprisingly. It gives you so winning
and kind an air!'----
"To these gallantries Marsupha added others. I insensibly joined in
the conversation; and when Marsupha had finished with me, he resumed
with my mistress. 'Seriously, Amisadar has attempted your conversion;
he has an admirable hand at conversions. Could you give me a sample
of his morals? I would lay a wager they are much the same with
mine.'----'We have thoroughly handled some points of gallantry. We have
analysed the difference between an affectionate woman and a woman of
gallantry. He is for the affectionate women'----'And you too without
doubt?'----'Not at all, my dear. I took great pains to demonstrate
to him, that we were all alike, and that we acted upon the same
principles: but he is not of this opinion. He establishes an infinity
of distinctions, which, I think, exist nowhere but in his imagination.
He has formed to himself, I can't tell what ideal creature, a chimæra
of a woman, a non-entity in a coif.'----'Madam,' answered Marsupha, 'I
know Amisadar. He is a lad of good sense, and has been very conversant
with the sex. If he has told you that there were such'----'Oh! whether
there are such or not,' interrupted Fannia, 'I could never conform to
their customs.'----'I believe it,' said Marsupha: 'and accordingly you
have chosen another sort of conduct more suitable to your birth and
merit. Those silly creatures are to be abandoned to philosophers: they
would never be look'd on at court.----"
Here Fannia's Toy stopt short. One of the principal perfections of
these orators was to break off their discourse _à propos_. They talk'd
as if they had never done any thing else: whence some authors have
inferr'd, that they were pure machines. In this place the African
author specifies all the metaphysical arguments of the Cartesians
against the soul of brutes, which he applies with all possible sagacity
to the prating of Toys. In a word, his opinion is, that Toys speak as
birds sing; that is to say, so perfectly without having been taught,
that, to be sure, they are prompted by some superior intelligence.
But you ask me how he disposes of his prince. He sends him to dine with
the favorite: at least 'tis there we shall find him in the following
chapter.