I am visited by Freeman, with whom I appear in Public, and am
caressed—am sent for by Lord Quiverwit, whose Presence I quit
flung—Narcissa is carried off by her Brother—I intend to pursue him,
and am dissuaded by my Friend—engage in Play, and lose all my Money—set
out for London—try my Fortune at the Gaming Table without
success—receive a letter from Narcissa—bilk my Tailor
While I entertained myself with these reflections, the news of the
duel, being communicated by some unknown channel, spread all over the
town. I was visited by Freeman, who testified his surprise at finding
me; for it was told, that Lord Quiverwit being dead of his wounds, I
had absconded, in order to avoid the cognizance of the law. I asked, if
people guessed the occasion of the quarrel; and, understanding it was
attributed to his lordship’s resentment of my reply in the Long Room,
confirmed that conjecture, glad to find Narcissa unsuspected. My
friend, after I had assured him that my antagonist was in no danger,
wished me joy of the event, than which, he said, nothing could happen
more opportunely to support the idea he had given of my character to
his friends, among whom he had been very assiduous in my behalf.
On the strength of this assurance, I went with him to the coffee-house,
where I was saluted by a great many of those very persons who had
shunned me the preceding day; and I found everybody making merry with
the story of Melinda’s French gallant. While I remained in this place,
I received a message from Lord Quiverwit, desiring, if I were not
engaged, to see me at his house.
Thither I immediately repaired, and was conducted to an apartment where
I was received by his lordship in bed. When we were left by ourselves,
he thanked me in very polite terms for having used the advantage
fortune had given me over him with such moderation, and asked pardon
for any offence his resentment might have prompted him to commit. “I
would willingly,” said he, “make you my friend; but, as it is
impossible for me to divest myself of my passion for Narcissa, I am too
well convinced of your sentiments, to think we shall ever agree on that
subject. I took the liberty, therefore, of sending for you, in order to
own candidly, that I cannot help opposing your success with that young
lady; though, at the same time I promise to regulate my opposition by
the dictates of justice and honour. This, however, I think proper to
advertise you of, that she has no independent fortune; and, if you
should even succeed in your addresses, you will have the mortification
to see her reduced to indigence, unless you have wherewithal to support
her—and I am credibly informed of your incapacity that way—nay, I will
confess, that, urged by this consideration, I have actually sent notice
to her brother of the progress I suspect you have made in her
affection, and desired him to take his precautions accordingly.”
Alarmed and provoked at this information, I told his lordship, that I
did not see how he could reconcile that piece of conduct with his
profession of open dealing, and flung away from him in a passion.
As I walked homeward, in hope of hearing from my mistress as usual by
means of Miss Williams, I was surprised with the waving of a
handkerchief from the window of a coach-and-six that passed by me at
full speed: and upon further observation, I saw a servant on horseback
riding after it, who, I knew by his livery, belonged to the squire.
Thunderstruck with this discovery, the knowledge of my misfortune
rushed all at once upon my reflection! I guessed immediately that the
signal was made by the dear hand of Narcissa, who, being hurried away
in consequence of Lord Quiverwit’s message to her brother, had no other
method of relating her distress, and imploring my assistance. Frantic
with this conjecture, I ran to my lodgings, snatched my pistols, and
ordered Strap to get post-horses, with such incoherence of speech and
disorder, that the poor valet, terrified with the suspicion of another
duel, instead of providing what I desired, went forthwith to Freeman,
who, being informed of my behaviour, came straight to my apartment, and
conjured me so pathetically to make him acquainted with the cause of my
uneasiness, that I could not refuse telling him my happiness was fled
with Narcissa, and that I must retrieve her or perish. He represented
the madness of such an undertaking, and endeavoured to divert me from
it with great strength of friendship and reason. But all his arguments
would have been ineffectual, had he not put me in mind of the
dependence I ought to have on the love of Narcissa, and the attachment
of her maid, who could not fail of finding opportunities to advertise
me of their situation; and at the same time demonstrated the injury my
charmer’s reputation must suffer from my precipitate retreat. I was
convinced and composed by these considerations: I appeared in public
with an air of tranquillity, was well received by the best company in
town, and, my misfortune taking air, condoled accordingly: while I had
the satisfaction of seeing Melinda so universally discountenanced that
she was fain to return to London, in order to avoid the scoffs and
censure of the ladies at Bath. But, though the hope of hearing from the
darling of my soul supported my spirits a little while, I began to be
very uneasy, when, at the end of several weeks I found that expectation
disappointed. In short, melancholy and despondence took possession of
my soul; and, repining at that providence which, by acting the
stepmother towards me, kept me from the fruition of my wishes, I
determined, in a fit of despair, to risk all I had at the gaming table,
with a view of acquiring a fortune sufficient to render me independent
for life; or of plunging myself into such a state of misery, as would
effectually crush every ambitious hope that now tortured my
imagination.
Actuated by this fatal resolution, I engaged in play, and, after some
turns of fortune found myself, at the end of three days, worth a
thousand pounds; but it was not my intention to stop there, for which
cause I kept Strap ignorant of my success, and continued my career
until I was reduced to five guineas, which I would have hazarded also,
had I not been ashamed to fall from a bet of two hundred pounds to such
a petty sum.
Having thus executed my scheme, I went home, amazed to find myself so
much at ease, and informed my friend Strap of my mischance with such
calmness, that he, imagining I joked, affected to receive the tidings
with great equanimity. But both he and I found ourselves mistaken very
soon. I had misinterpreted my own stupidity into deliberate
resignation, and he had reason to believe me in earnest when he saw me
next morning agitated with the most violent despair, which he
endeavoured to alleviate with all the consolation in his power.
In one of my lucid intervals, however, I charged him to take a place in
the stage coach for London; and, in the meantime, paid my debts in
Bath, which amounted to thirty shillings only. Without taking leave of
my friends, I embarked, Strap having the good fortune to find a return
horse, and arrived in town, without having met with anything remarkable
on the road. While we crossed Bagshot Heath, I was seized with a sort
of inclination to retrieve my fortune, by laying passengers under
contribution in some such place. My thoughts were so circumstanced at
this time, that I should have digested the crime of robbery, so
righteously had I concerted my plan, and ventured my life in the
execution, had I not been deterred by reflecting upon the infamy that
attends detection.
The apartment I formerly lived in being unengaged, I took possession of
it, and next day went in quest of Banter, who received me with open
arms, in expectation of having his bond discharged to his liking: but
when he understood what had happened, his countenance changed of a
sudden, and he told me, with a dryness of displeasure peculiar to
himself, that, if he were in my place, he would put it out of fortune’s
power to play him such another trick, and be avenged of his own
indiscretion at once. When I desired him to explain his meaning, he
pointed to his neck, raised himself on his tiptoes, and was going away
without any further ceremony, when I put him in mind of my indigence,
and demanded the five guineas I had formerly lent him. “Five guineas?”
cried he; “zounds! had you acted with common prudence, you might have
had twenty thousand in your pocket by this time. I depended upon five
hundred from you, as much as if I had had notes for it in the bank; and
by all the rules of equity, you are indebted to me for that sum.” I was
neither pleased nor convinced by this computation, and insisted on my
right with such determined obstinacy, that he was fain to alter his
ton, and appease my clamour by assuring me, that he was not master of
five shillings. Society in distress generally promotes good
understanding among people; from being a dun I descended to be a
client, and asked his advice about repairing my losses. He counselled
me to have recourse again to the gaming table, where I succeeded so
well before, and put myself in a condition by selling my watch. I
followed his directions, and, having accommodated him with a few
pieces, went to the place, where I lost every shilling.
Then I returned to my lodgings full of desperate resolution, and having
made Strap acquainted with my fate, ordered him to pawn my sword
immediately, that I might be enabled to make another effort. This
affectionate creature no sooner understood my purpose, than, seized
with insupportable sorrow at the prospect of my misery, he burst into
tears, and asked what I proposed to do after the small sum he could
raise on the sword should be spent. “On my own account” said he, “I am
quite unconcerned; for, while God spares me health and these ten
fingers, I can earn a comfortable subsistence anywhere; but what must
become of you, who have less humility to stoop, and more appetites to
gratify?” Here I interrupted him, by saying, with a gloomy aspect, I
should never want a resource while I had a loaded pistol in possession.
Stupified with horror at this dreadful insinuation, he stood mute for
some time and then broke out into “God of his infinite mercy enable you
to withstand that temptation of the devil! Consider your immortal
soul—there’s no repentance in the grave! O Lord! that we ever should
have come to this! Are we not enjoined to resign ourselves to the will
of Heaven?—where is your patience?—Durum patientia frango—you are but a
young man—there may be many good things in store for you—accidit in
puncto quo non speratur in anno—remember your uncle, Mr. Bowling;
perhaps he is now on his voyage homeward, pleasing himself with the
hopes of seeing and relieving you; nay, peradventure, he has already
arrived, for the ship was expected about this time.” A ray of hope shot
athwart my soul at this suggestion; I thanked my friend for this
seasonable recollection, and, after having promised to take no
resolution till his return, dismissed him to Wapping for intelligence.
In his absence I was visited by Banter, who, being informed of my bad
luck at play, told me that fortune would probably be one day weary of
persecuting me. “In the meantime,” said he, “here’s a letter for you,
which I received just now inclosed in one from Freeman.” I snatched it
with eagerness, and knowing the superscription to be of Narcissa’s
handwriting, kissed it with transport, and, having opened it, read:
“It is with great difficulty that I have stolen, from the observation
of those spies who are set over me, this opportunity of telling you,
that I was suddenly carried away from Bath by my brother, who was
informed of our correspondence by Lord Quiverwit whom, I since
understand, you have wounded in a duel on my account. As I am fully
convinced of your honour and love, I hope I shall never hear of such
desperate proofs of either for the future. I am so strictly watched
that it will be impossible for you to see me, until my brother’s
suspicion shall abate, or Heaven contrive some other unforeseen event
in our behalf. In the meantime, you may depend on the constancy and
affection of
“Your own
“Narcissa.
“P. S. Miss Williams, who is my fellow prisoner, desires to be
remembered to you. We are both in good health, and only in pain for
you, especially as it will be impracticable for you to convey any
message or letter to the place of our confinement; for which reason
pray desist from the attempt, that, by miscarrying, might prolong
our captivity.
“N—.”
This kind letter afforded me great consolation: I communicated it to
Banter, and, at the same time, showed him her picture: he approved of
her beauty and good sense, and could not help owning that my neglect of
Miss Snapper was excusable, when such a fine creature engrossed my
attention.
I began to be reconciled to my fate, and imagined, that, if I could
contrive means of subsisting until my uncle should arrive, in case he
were not already at home, he would enable me to do something effectual
in behalf of my love and fortune; I therefore consulted Banter about a
present supply, who no sooner understood that I had credit, with a
tailor, than he advised me to take off two or three suits of rich
clothes, and convert them into cash, by selling them at half-price to a
salesman in Monmouth Street. I was startled at this proposal, which I
thought savoured a little of fraud; he rendered it palatable, by
observing that, in a few months, I might be in a condition to do
everybody justice; and, in the meantime, I was acquitted by the honesty
of my intention. I suffered myself to be persuaded by his salvo, by
which my necessity, rather than my judgment, was convinced; and, when I
found there were no accounts of the ship in which my uncle embarked,
actually put the scheme in practice, and raised by it five-and-twenty
guineas, paying him for his advice with the old five.