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[Illustration: ASHLEY DOWN ORPHAN HOUSES, BRISTOL, ENG.]
THE LIFE OF TRUST:
BEING A
NARRATIVE OF THE LORD'S DEALINGS
WITH
GEORGE MUeLLER, WRITTEN BY HIMSELF.
EDITED AND CONDENSED BY
REV. H. LINCOLN WAYLAND,
PASTOR OF THE THIRD BAPTIST CHURCH, WORCESTER, MASS.
With an Introduction
BY
FRANCIS WAYLAND.
BOSTON:
GOULD AND LINCOLN,
59 WASHINGTON STREET.
NEW YORK: SHELDON AND COMPANY.
CINCINNATI: GEORGE S. BLANCHARD.
1861.
Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1860, by
GOULD AND LINCOLN,
In the Clerk's office of the District Court
of the District of Massachusetts.
STEREOTYPED AND PRINTED BY
GEO. C. RAND AND AVERY, 3 CORNHILL.
* * * * *
EDITOR'S PREFACE.
Having been requested by MESSRS. GOULD AND LINCOLN to examine the work
entitled "A NARRATIVE OF SOME OF THE LORD'S DEALINGS WITH GEORGE
MUeLLER," the Editor was convinced that its republication in this country
would greatly promote the piety of American Christians. But to reproduce
the work in its original form was attended with difficulty. The
"Narrative," in four parts, (published respectively in 1837, 1841, 1845,
and 1856,) and the four "Annual Reports" issued in 1857, 1858, 1859, and
1860, would occupy not less than eighteen hundred pages of the size of
those contained in this volume. The cost of such a work would greatly
limit its circulation and its usefulness, if indeed any publisher should
undertake its issue. There seemed no alternative except to abandon the
idea of an American edition altogether, or to present it to the public
in a condensed form.
Such a condensation seemed, on examination, to be entirely practicable.
Owing to the "Parts" of the "Narrative" having been published at four
separate periods, it often happens that the same matter is several
times repeated. A large portion of the space is occupied with the
acknowledgment of donations received. These entries, although
appropriate in a report made to the donors and to the British public,
have not the same interest for American readers. The discussion of some
points in church polity, and the account of the Author's journeys upon
the Continent, though interesting and instructive, are not necessary to
the continuity of the history. Although in some cases the portions which
have been omitted cover a considerable period of time, yet it is
believed that all which is essential has been retained. No pains have
been spared on the part of the Editor to preserve the value of the work
while reducing its compass, and to give, in a form universally
accessible, a clear exhibition of the wonderful results of the life of
George Mueller, as well as of the principles by which his life has been
governed.
Believing that the book would be rendered more attractive to the reader,
and more convenient for reference, the Editor has divided it into
Chapters, and has prefixed to each a brief statement of some of the
leading subjects introduced in the Chapter. For these "contents," as
well as for the headings of the Chapters, and for the general title of
the volume, the Editor alone is responsible.
The "Narrative" of George Mueller has been blessed in other lands to the
awakening of spiritual life. It was the means, as will be observed by
the reader, of greatly forwarding, if not of originating, the work of
grace now advancing in Ireland. "THE LIFE OF TRUST" is submitted to the
Christian public of America, in the hope that its still small voice may
be heard even amid the clangor of political strife and the revulsion of
commercial interests, and that it may be used by the Divine Spirit to
promote and strengthen in the hearts of American Christians, FAITH IN
THE LIVING GOD.
H. L. W.
WORCESTER, DEC. 12, 1860
AUTHOR'S PREFACE.
It was only after the consideration of many months, and after much
self-examination as to my motives, and after much earnest prayer, that I
came to the conclusion to write this work. I have not taken one single
step in the Lord's service concerning which I have prayed so much. My
great dislike to increasing the number of religious books would, in
itself, have been sufficient to have kept me forever from it, had I not
cherished the hope of being instrumental in this way to lead some of my
brethren to value the Holy Scriptures more, and to judge by the standard
of the Word of God the principles on which they act. But that which
weighed more with me than anything, was, that I have reason to believe,
from what I have seen among the children of God, that many of their
trials arise either from want of confidence in the Lord as it regards
temporal things, or from carrying on their business in an unscriptural
way. On account, therefore, of the remarkable way in which the Lord has
dealt with me as to temporal things, I feel that I am a debtor to the
church of Christ, and that I ought, for the benefit of my poorer
brethren especially, to make known the way in which I have been led. In
addition to this, I know that to many souls the Lord has blessed what I
have told them about the way in which he has led me, and therefore it
seemed a duty to use such means, whereby others also, with whom I could
not possibly converse, might be benefited. That which induced me finally
to determine to write this Narrative was, that if the Lord should permit
the book to sell, I might, by the profits arising from the sale, be
enabled in a greater degree to help the poor brethren and sisters among
whom I labor;--a matter which, just at that time, weighed much on my
mind. I therefore began to write. But after three days I was obliged to
lay the work aside on account of my other pressing engagements.
Subsequently, I was laid aside on account of an abscess; and being
unable, for many weeks, to walk about as usual, though able to work at
home, I had time for writing. When the manuscript was nearly completed I
gave it to a brother to look over, that I might have his judgment; and
the Lord so refreshed his spirit through it, that he offered to advance
the means for having it printed, with the understanding that if the book
should not sell he would never consider me his debtor. By this offer not
a small obstacle was removed, as I have no means of my own to defray the
expense of printing. These last two circumstances, connected with many
other points, confirmed me that I had not been mistaken, when I came to
the conclusion that it was the will of God that I should serve his
church in this way.
The fact of my being a foreigner, and therefore but very imperfectly
acquainted with the English language, I judged to be no sufficient
reason for keeping me from writing. The Christian reader, being
acquainted with this fact, will candidly excuse any inaccuracy of
expression.
For the poor among the brethren this Narrative is especially intended,
and to their prayers I commend it in particular.
GEORGE MUeLLER.
CONTENTS.
INTRODUCTION XV
CHAPTER I.
Boyhood and Youth.
1805-1825.
BIRTH--EARLY DISHONESTY--INSENSIBILITY--CONFIRMATION IN
THE STATE CHURCH--DISSOLUTENESS OF LIFE--THE HARD WAY OF
TRANSGRESSORS--THE GYMNASIUM AT NORDHAUSEN--THE
UNIVERSITY AT HALLE--ROVINGS 31
CHAPTER II.
The Prodigal's Return.
1825-1826.
A TREASURE FOUND--DAWNING OF THE NEW LIFE--THE PEACE OF
GOD--"I AM COME TO SET A MAN AT VARIANCE AGAINST HIS
FATHER"--"LET HIM THAT HEARETH SAY, COME"--THE FIRST
SERMON--DELIGHT IN THE LORD--A COMMON ERROR--THE FOUNTAIN
NEGLECTED 38
CHAPTER III.
Self-Dedication.
1826-1829.
DESIRE FOR MISSIONARY LABOR--PROVIDENTIAL RELEASE FROM
MILITARY SERVICE--VISIT AT HOME--LED TO THE LAND OF HIS
FUTURE LABORS--PROGRESS IN RELIGIOUS KNOWLEDGE--DESIRE
FOR IMMEDIATE USEFULNESS 47
CHAPTER IV.
Leaning on Jesus.
1830-1832.
A DOOR OPENED--TOKENS FOR GOOD--TRUST EXERCISED IN THE
STUDY AND MINISTRY OF THE WORD--THE SWORD OF THE
SPIRIT--TRUSTING IN GOD FOR DAILY BREAD--BLESSEDNESS OF
WAITING UPON THE LORD--"OWE NO MAN"--"ACCORDING TO YOUR
FAITH BE IT UNTO YOU"--THE GIFT OF FAITH AND THE GRACE
OF FAITH 58
CHAPTER V.
Ministry at Bristol Begun.
1832-1833.
"HERE HAVE WE NO CONTINUING CITY"--CAUTION TO THE
CHRISTIAN TRAVELLER--NEW TOKENS FOR GOOD--THE WAY MADE
CLEAR--MEETINGS FOR INQUIRY--NO RESPECT OF PERSONS WITH
GOD--FRANCKE, "BEING DEAD, YET SPEAKETH"--DAILY BREAD
SUPPLIED--A PECULIAR PEOPLE 80
CHAPTER VI.
The Scriptural Knowledge Institution.
1834-1835.
UNSCRIPTURAL CHARACTER OF THE EXISTING RELIGIOUS AND
BENEVOLENT SOCIETIES--A NEW INSTITUTION PROPOSED--GOD'S
WORD THE ONLY RULE, AND GOD'S PROMISE THE ONLY
DEPENDENCE--"IN EVERYTHING LET YOUR REQUEST BE MADE KNOWN
UNTO GOD"--EARNEST OF THE DIVINE BLESSING ON THE
INSTITUTION--BEREAVEMENT--HELPER SEASONABLY SENT--REWARD
OF SEEKING GOD'S FACE 94
CHAPTER VII.
Home for Destitute Orphans.
1835-1836.
FRANKE'S WORKS FOLLOW HIM--A GREAT UNDERTAKING
CONCEIVED--REASONS FOR ESTABLISHING AN ORPHAN
HOUSE--PRAYER FOR GUIDANCE--TREASURE LAID UP IN HEAVEN IN
PRAYER AND IN FAITH THE WORK IS BEGUN 111
CHAPTER VIII.
The Field Widening.
1836-1837.
AN UNEXPECTED OBSTACLE--IMPLICIT SUBMISSION--A SECOND
ORPHAN HOUSE PROPOSED--AN ENCOURAGING TEXT--THE NEW
ORPHAN HOUSE OPENED--COMPLETED ANSWER TO PRAYER--PROGRESS
OF THE LORD'S WORK--THE OVERSIGHT OF THE FLOCK 125
CHAPTER IX.
Trial.
1838.
THE MINISTRY OF SICKNESS--PEACE OF MIND--JESUS A PRESENT
HELP--DEEP POVERTY--PLEADING WITH GOD--UNITED PRAYER 138
CHAPTER X.
Deliverance.
1838.
"PERPLEXED BUT NOT IN DESPAIR"--FAITH JUSTIFIED--A LESSON
OF OBEDIENCE--BOUNTIFUL SUPPLIES--SPIRITUAL
INGATHERING--A DAY OF MERCIES--TIMELY AID--A SEASON OF
PLENTY--OBEDIENCE REWARDED 151
CHAPTER XI.
Asking and Receiving.
1839.
HELP FOR THE POOR SAINTS--THE UNFAILING BANK--MEANS
EXHAUSTED--LIBERALITY OF A LABORING SISTER--"HE KNOWETH
OUR FRAME"--REDEEMING THE TIME--GODLINESS PROFITABLE
UNTO ALL THINGS 167
CHAPTER XII.
Plenty and Want.
1840.
A PURE OFFERING REQUIRED--A JOURNEY PROPOSED--SEASONABLE
PROVISION--LOOKING ONLY TO THE LORD--THE WRATH OF MAN
PRAISING GOD--A PROMISE FULFILLED--BENEFIT OF TRIAL--NEW
SPRINGS OPENED--BEFORE THEY CALL I WILL ANSWER--TRUST IN
GOD COMMENDED--SPIRITUAL BLESSINGS 181
CHAPTER XIII.
Faith Strengthened by Exercise.
1841.
A WANT SUPPLIED--RESOURCES EXCEEDING THE DEMAND--EVIL OF
SURETYSHIP--POWER OF CHRISTIAN LOVE--GOD'S WORD THE FOOD
OF THE SOUL--PREPARATION FOR THE HOUR OF
TRIAL--POVERTY--DEPENDING ONLY ON THE LIVING GOD 200
CHAPTER XIV.
Walking in Darkness.
1841-1842.
"GOD'S WAY LEADS INTO TRIAL"--GROUNDS OF
THANKFULNESS--PROTRACTED DARKNESS--CAST DOWN, BUT NOT
DESTROYED--TRUST IN GOD COMMENDED--THE MEANS OF ITS
ATTAINMENT--REVIEW OF THE WORK 214
CHAPTER XV.
Prosperity.
1842-1843.
ABUNDANT SUPPLIES--RESTING ON THE WRITTEN WORD--"SEEKING
AND FINDING"--ERRONEOUS IMPRESSIONS REMOVED--PERSEVERING
AND PREVAILING PRAYER ANSWERED--"LENGTHENING THE CORDS
AND STRENGTHENING THE STAKES"--A FOURTH ORPHAN HOUSE 241
CHAPTER XVI.
Stewardship.
1844.
EARTHLY AND HEAVENLY TREASURES--SEEKING THE KINGDOM OF
GOD--FELLOWSHIP WITH THE FATHER--THE CHRISTIAN
MERCHANT--EXAMPLES--MISTAKES 259
CHAPTER XVII.
Reaping Bountifully.
1845-1846.
AN UNEXPECTED REQUEST--DELIBERATION--A GREAT
UNDERTAKING--RELIANCE ON THE RESOURCES OF THE LIVING
GOD--AN ANSWER EXPECTED AND RECEIVED--PRAYER FOR FAITH
AND PATIENCE--FURTHER PROOFS OF DIVINE FAVOR--THE
BLESSEDNESS OF DEVISING LIBERAL THINGS 294
CHAPTER XVIII.
Faith Confirmed by Prosperity.
1846-1848.
THE SPIRIT OF SUPPLICATION BESTOWED AND PRAYER
ANSWERED--THE TIME OF MAN'S NEED AND OF GOD'S
BOUNTY--FAITH NOT SHAKEN--DEALING ONLY WITH GOD--THE
NEEDED AMOUNT FURNISHED--PERPETUAL "NEED"--NOT WEARY IN
GOD'S WORK--JOY IN ANSWERED PRAYER--FOUR REQUESTS
GRANTED--"CONTINUING INSTANT IN PRAYER"--THE BUILDING
COMMENCED--PERSONAL HISTORY--A MARKED DELIVERANCE 319
CHAPTER XIX.
Continued Mercies.
1848-1850.
HUMBLE BEGINNINGS--DEVISING LIBERAL THINGS--THE ORPHANS
PROVIDED FOR--A MEMORABLE DAY--MONEY "AT INTEREST"--MEANS
FROM AN UNEXPECTED SOURCE--THE PROGRESS OF THE NEW ORPHAN
HOUSE--MEANS PROVIDED FOR ITS COMPLETION--INEXPRESSIBLE
DELIGHT IN GOD--REVIEW OF THE TWO YEARS PAST 347
CHAPTER XX.
A New Victory of Faith.
1850-1851.
PAST MERCIES AN ENCOURAGEMENT TO NEW UNDERTAKINGS--A
HOUSE FOR SEVEN HUNDRED ORPHANS PROPOSED--WALKING BY
FAITH--COUNSEL SOUGHT FROM GOD--THE PURPOSE
FORMED--DELIGHT IN THE MAGNITUDE AND DIFFICULTY
OF THE DESIGN 364
CHAPTER XXI.
Unvarying Prosperity.
1850-1852.
DESIRES FOR MORE ENLARGED USEFULNESS GRATIFIED--A LARGE
DONATION ANTICIPATED AND RECEIVED--REVIEW OF
1851--PERSONAL EXPERIENCE--BUILDING FUND FOR THE SECOND
NEW ORPHAN HOUSE--DOUBT RESISTED--WAITING ON GOD NOT
IN VAIN--REVIEW OF 1852 389
CHAPTER XXII.
Reaping in Joy.
1852-1854.
EXPECTING GREAT THINGS FROM GOD--MUNIFICENT
DONATION--INCREASING USEFULNESS OF THE SCRIPTURAL
KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION--ACCESS TO GOD THROUGH FAITH IN
CHRIST--A VOICE FROM MOUNT LEBANON--BENEFIT OF WAITING
GOD'S TIME--CAREFUL STEWARDSHIP--FAITH, THE ONLY
RELIANCE--"THIS POOR WIDOW HATH CAST IN MORE THAN THEY
ALL"--GREATER ACHIEVEMENTS OF FAITH ANTICIPATED--COUNSEL
TO TRACT DISTRIBUTORS--A NEW AND SEVERE TRIAL OF FAITH 402
CHAPTER XXIII.
Three Years of Prosperity.
1854-1857.
THE SITE SELECTED--SIX THOUSAND ORPHANS IN PRISON--HOW TO
ASK FOR DAILY BREAD--REVIEW OF TWENTY-FOUR YEARS--"TAKE
NO THOUGHT FOR THE MORROW"--INSURANCE AGAINST BAD DEBTS 426
CHAPTER XXIV.
Conclusion.
1857-1860.
THE HOUSE FOR FOUR HUNDRED OPENED--PRAYER MORE THAN
ANSWERED--THE RESORT IN TROUBLE--AN OUTPOURING OF THE
SPIRIT ON THE ORPHANS--LAND FOR A NEW BUILDING
PURCHASED--"BUT ONE LIFE TO SPEND FOR GOD"--"SCATTERING,
YET INCREASING"--A MEMORABLE YEAR--THE GERM OF THE IRISH
REVIVAL--LETTER FROM AN ORPHAN--THE FRUIT OF SIX MONTHS'
PRAYER--THE RESULTS OF THE WORK--REVIVAL AMONG
THE ORPHANS 446
APPENDIX 473
INTRODUCTION.
What is meant by the prayer of faith? is a question which is beginning
to arrest, in an unusual degree, the attention of Christians. What is
the significance of the passages both in the New Testament and the Old
which refer to it? What is the limit within which they may be safely
received as a ground of practical reliance? Were these promises limited
to prophetical or apostolical times; or have they been left as a legacy
to all believers until the end shall come?
Somehow or other, these questions are seldom discussed either from the
pulpit or the press. I do not remember to have heard any of them
distinctly treated of in a sermon. I do not know of any work in which
this subject is either theoretically explained or practically enforced.
It really seems as if this portion of Revelation was, by common consent,
ignored in all our public teachings. Do not men believe that God means
what he appears plainly to have asserted? or, if we believe that he
means it, do we fear the charge of fanaticism if we openly avow that we
take him at his word?
The public silence on this subject does not, however, prevent a very
frequent private inquiry in respect to it. The thoughtful Christian,
when in his daily reading of the Scriptures he meets with any of those
wonderful promises made to believing prayer, often pauses to ask
himself, What can these words mean? Can it be that God has made such
promises as these to me, and to such men as I am? Have I really
permission to commit all my little affairs to a God of infinite wisdom,
believing that he will take charge of them and direct them according to
the promptings of boundless love and absolute omniscience? Is prayer
really a power with God, or is it merely an expedient by which our own
piety may be cultivated? Is it not merely a power (that is, a stated
antecedent accompanied by the idea of causation), but is it a
transcendent power, accomplishing what no other power can, over-ruling
all other agencies, and rendering them subservient to its own wonderful
efficiency? I think there are few devout readers of the Bible to whom
these questions are not frequently suggested. We ask them, but we do not
often wait for an answer. These promises seem to us to be addressed
either to a past or to a coming age, but not to us, at the present day.
Yet with such views as these the devout soul is not at all satisfied. If
an invaluable treasure is here reserved for the believer, he asks, why
should I not receive my portion of it? He cannot doubt that God has in a
remarkable manner, at various times, answered his prayers; why should he
not always answer them? and why should not the believer always draw near
to God in full confidence that he will do as he has said? He may
remember that the prayer which has been manifestly answered was the
offspring of deep humility, of conscious unworthiness, of utter
self-negation, and of simple and earnest reliance on the promises of God
through the mediation of Christ. Why should not his prayers be always of
the same character? With the apostles of old he pours out his soul in
the petition, "Lord, increase our faith."
And yet it can scarcely be denied that the will of God has been
distinctly revealed on this subject. The promises made to believing
prayer are explicit, numerous, and diversified. If we take them in their
simple and literal meaning, or if in fact we give to them any reasonable
interpretation whatever, they seem to be easily understood. Our
difficulty seems to be this: the promise is so "exceeding great" that we
cannot conceive God really to mean what he clearly appears to have
revealed. The blessing seems too vast for our comprehension; we "stagger
at the promises, through unbelief," and thus fail to secure the treasure
which was purchased for us by Christ Jesus.
It may be appropriate for us to review some of the passages which refer
most directly to this subject:--
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it
shall be opened unto you; for _every one_ that asketh receiveth, and he
that seeketh findeth, and to him that knocketh _it shall_ be opened."
"If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children,
_how much more_ shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to
them that _ask_ him."[1]
[Footnote 1: Matthew vii. 7-11.]
In the Gospel of Luke the same words are repeated, with a single
variation at the close. "If ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts
unto your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father give the
_Holy Spirit to them that ask him_."[2]
[Footnote 2: Luke xi. 13.]
"I say unto you that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching
anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father
which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my
name, there am I in the midst of them."[3]
[Footnote 3: Matthew xviii. 19, 20.]
"Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have
faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do that which is done to the
fig-tree, but also ye shall say to this mountain, Be thou removed, and
be thou cast into the sea, and it shall be done. And _all things
whatsoever_ ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."[4]
[Footnote 4: Matthew xxi. 21, 22.]
The same promise, slightly varied in form, is found in the Gospel of
Mark. "_Have faith in God._ For verily I say unto you that whosoever
shall say to this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the
sea, and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those
things which he hath said shall come to pass, he shall have whatever he
saith. Therefore I say unto you, Whatsoever things ye desire, when ye
pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them."[5]
[Footnote 5: Mark xi. 22-24.]
Now I do not pretend that we are obliged to receive these words
literally. Unless, however, we believe the Saviour to have spoken
repeatedly on the same subject, at random, and with no definite meaning,
we must understand him to have asserted that things impossible by the
ordinary laws of material causation are possible by faith in God. I do
not perceive, if we allow these words to have any meaning whatever, that
we can ascribe to them any other significance.
"Verily I say unto you, He that believeth in me, the works that I do
shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do, because I go
unto my Father. And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that I will do,
that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If ye shall ask anything in
my name I will do it."[6]
[Footnote 6: John xiv. 12-14.]
"Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name,
he will give it you. Hitherto ye have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and
ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."[7]
[Footnote 7: John xvi. 23, 24.]
"The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man _availeth much_;"[8]
that is, it is a real power, a positive energy. The apostle illustrates
what he means by availing prayer by the example of Elias, a man subject
to like passions as we are: "He prayed earnestly that it might not rain,
and it rained not on the earth by the space of three years and six
months; and he prayed again, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth
brought forth her fruit."[9]
[Footnote 8: James v. 16.]
[Footnote 9: James v. 17, 18.]
The conditions on which prayer will be heard are in various places
specified, but particularly in John xv. 7: "If ye abide in me and my
words abide in you, ye shall _ask what ye will_, and it shall be done
unto you." That is, if I understand the passage, prevalence in prayer is
conditioned by the conformity of our souls to the will of God; "if ye
abide in me and my words abide in you." On this condition, and on this
only, may we ask what we will, with the assurance that it will be done
unto us. Faith, in its most simple meaning, is that temper of the mind
in the creature which responds to every revealed perfection of the
Creator. Just according to the degree in which this correspondence
exists, is the promise made that we shall have whatsoever we ask.
It is evident, from the eleventh of Hebrews, that the views of the
Apostle Paul concerning faith were entirely in harmony with the passages
recited above. He reviews the lives of the most eminent saints, for the
express purpose of showing that the impressive events in their history,
whether physical or moral, were controlled entirely by faith. He sums up
the whole in this remarkable language:--
"And what shall I say more? For the time would fail me to tell of those
who _through faith_ subdued kingdoms, wrought righteousness, obtained
promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the violence of fire,
escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, waxed
valiant in fight, turned to flight the armies of the aliens; women
received their dead raised to life again; and others were tortured, not
accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection." We
are, I think, taught by this passage that the apostle believed faith to
be a power capable of transcending and modifying every other agency, by
which changes became possible which to every other known power were
impossible. We see that in this catalogue of the victories of faith he
includes the subjection of almost every form of what we call natural
laws. The whole passage seems an illustration of the meaning of our
Lord, when he says, "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye
shall say to this sycamine tree, Be thou removed and planted in the
midst of the sea, and it shall obey you."
It seems then apparent that the doctrine of the peculiar and wonderful
power of the prayer of faith is as clearly revealed in the Scriptures as
any other doctrine. It would seem evident, at any rate, from the
passages just quoted, that the Apostle Paul understood the teachings of
our Saviour to mean what they say. From the general tenor of the
Scriptures I think we may learn two important truths: First, that there
is a certain state of mind in a devout soul to which God has promised
all that it asks, subject, however, as to the manner of the answer, to
the dictates of his infinite wisdom and goodness; and, second, that in
granting such petitions he does not always limit his action within the
ordinary or acknowledged laws of matter or of mind. I do not perceive
how we can interpret the passages above cited, as well as many others,
without giving them a meaning at least as extensive as this.
Why is it, then, that this whole range of revealed truth has so
generally been looked upon as an unknown and unexplored region? Why
should we limit either the goodness or the power of God by our own
knowledge of what we call the laws of nature? Why should we not admit
that "there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of in
our philosophy"? In a universe governed by moral law, why should not
moral laws take precedence of all others? Why should we deny that there
is a power in prayer to which we have not commonly attained? We are
straitened in ourselves, and suppose that we are straitened in God. We
interpret the gracious promises of our most loving Father in heaven by
the rule of our own imperfect and unbelieving piety. We ask for light
from without, while the light can only come from a more elevated piety
within. We ask for examples of the effects of faith at the present day,
corresponding to those spoken of in the sacred Scriptures. Thoughtful
men acknowledge that there must be a meaning in these promises, which
they have not yet understood, and they see plainly that the kingdom of
God can never come with power until this prevalence in prayer shall have
become a matter of universal attainment; and yet they dare hardly
believe that God is as good as he has revealed himself to be.
There have, nevertheless, from time to time, occurred, what plainly
appear to be, remarkable instances of answers to prayer. Many of them
have faded from recollection, with the generation in which they
occurred; those which are remembered, however, seem to teach us that God
is a living God now as truly as in times past. The history of
persecutions is always filled with remarkable answers to prayer. The
rescue of Peter from the power of the Sanhedrim in one case, and from
the power of Herod in another, has been a thousand times repeated in the
history of the church of Christ. The answer to prayer for divine
direction as to the time and manner of performing some Christian
service, to which an individual has felt himself specially called, has
frequently been very remarkable. The biographies of the early and of
many of the later Friends are replete with such instances. Any one who
will read the edifying memoirs of George Fox, John Woolman, William
Allen, and Stephen Grellet, will find what I have alluded to abundantly
exemplified. The well-authenticated accounts of the late revivals in
this country and in Ireland teach us that most remarkable instances of
answers to prayer were of almost daily occurrence. In the last century a
single instance deserves particular remembrance; it was the founding of
Franke's Orphan House at Halle. It seemed to him to be a Christian duty
to attempt something for the relief of orphans, and he commenced the
undertaking. From time to time, as the number of applicants increased,
the means for their support was provided, in answer, as he firmly
believed, to fervent and unceasing prayer. Thus an extensive
establishment was reared, which has continued to the present day,
providing education and support for thousands of the poor and destitute,
and it has been for a century and a half one of the most honored of the
charitable institutions of the continent of Europe.
The most remarkable instance of the efficacy of prayer with which I am
acquainted, is that recorded in the following pages. It seems, in fact,
to be a practical illustration of the meaning of those passages of
Scripture which I have already recited. A young German Christian,
friendless and unknown, is conscious of what he believes to be a call
from the Lord to attempt something for the benefit of the poor vagabond
children of Bristol. He is at this time preaching the gospel to a small
company of believers, from whom, at his own suggestion, he receives no
salary, being supported day by day by the voluntary offerings of his
brethren. Without the promise of aid from any being but God, he
commences his work. In answer to prayer, funds are received as they are
needed, and the attempt succeeds beyond his expectation. After a few
years he is led to believe that God has called him to establish a house
for the maintenance and education of orphans. He was impelled to this
effort, not only from motives of benevolence, but from a desire to
convince men that God was a LIVING GOD, as ready now as ever to answer
prayer; and that, in the discharge of any duty to which he calls us, we
may implicitly rely upon his all-sufficient aid in every emergency.
Mr. Mueller was led to undertake this work in such a manner that aid
could not be expected from any being but God. He did not of course
expect God to create gold and silver and put them into his hands. He
knew, however, that God could incline the hearts of men to aid him, and
he believed, if the thing that he attempted was of Him, that he would so
incline them, in answer to prayer, as his necessities should require.
Most men in making such an attempt would have spread the case before the
public, employed agents to solicit in its behalf, and undertaken
nothing until funds adequate to the success of the enterprise had been
already secured. But Mr. Mueller, true to his principles, would do no
such thing. From the first day to the present moment he has neither
directly nor indirectly solicited either of the public or of an
individual a single penny. As necessities arose he simply laid his case
before God and asked of him all that he needed, and the supply has
always been seasonable and unfailing.
The conductors of benevolent enterprises generally consider it important
to publish the names of donors, appealing thus to what is considered an
innocent desire in man to let our good deeds be known, and thus also to
stimulate others to do likewise. Ignoring every motive of this kind, Mr.
Mueller made it his rule to publish the name of no contributor. When the
name was known to him, which, however, was not often the case, he made a
private acknowledgment; while in his printed account he only made known
the sum received, and the date of its reception. In this manner,
forsaking every other reliance but God, and in childlike simplicity
looking to him alone for the supply of every want, all that he needed
was furnished as punctually as if, in possession of millions, he had
drawn from time to time on his banker.
Thus has he continued from, I think, the year 1834. By degrees the
establishment increased, and it was necessary to leave the hired houses
in which the children had thus far been accommodated. Land was
purchased, and a building was erected in the vicinity of Bristol. This
was soon filled to overflowing, and another building was demanded. This
was erected, and it also was very soon filled. These buildings were
sufficient to accommodate seven hundred orphans. At the present moment,
a third building, larger than either, is in the process of erection, and
is to be finished in the course of the ensuing summer. When this shall
be completed, accommodations will have been provided for eleven hundred
and fifty orphans. These expensive buildings have been erected; the
land has been purchased on which they stand; this multitude of children
has been clothed and fed and educated; support and remuneration have
been provided for all the necessary teachers and assistants, and all
this has been done by a man who is not worth a dollar. He has never
asked any one but God for whatever they needed, and from the beginning
they have never wanted a meal, nor have they ever allowed themselves to
be in debt. There seems in this to be something as remarkable as if Mr.
Mueller had commanded a sycamine tree to be removed and planted in the
sea, and it had obeyed him.
But this is not all. Mr. Mueller saw that there was a great demand for
copies of the Holy Scriptures, both in Great Britain and on the
Continent, and he commenced the work of Bible distribution. This so
rapidly extended itself that he was soon obliged to open in Bristol a
large Bible House. He believed that great good might be done by the
circulation of religious tracts, and he has carried on this work
extensively. He was moved to make an attempt to aid and even to support
missionaries among the heathen, as well as other good men, of various
denominations, who, with very inadequate means of living, were preaching
the gospel to the poor and destitute at home. He began to aid them as
their necessities came to his knowledge, and now one hundred such men
are depending on him, wholly or in part, for support.
Here, then, we certainly behold a remarkable phenomenon. A single man,
wholly destitute of funds, is supporting and educating seven hundred
orphans, providing everything needful for their education, is in himself
an extensive Bible and Tract and Missionary Society, the work is daily
increasing in magnitude, and the means for carrying it on are abundantly
supplied, while he is connected with no particular denomination, is
aided by no voluntary association, and he has asked the assistance of
not a single individual. He has asked no one but God, and all his wants
have been regularly supplied. In these labors of love he has, up to the
present time, expended nearly a million of dollars. It is thus that he
has endeavored to show to an unbelieving world that God is a living God,
and that he means what he has said in every one of his promises.[10]
[Footnote 10: The following brief statistics will show the
magnitude of the work already accomplished:--
The number of pupils hitherto instructed in all the day,
evening, and Sunday schools, is 13,124. The whole number
of _orphans_ educated within the establishment is 1,153.
Of the 700 now in the Institution, 260 are hopefully
pious. Missionaries aided at the present time, 100. Since
1834 there have been circulated,--Bibles, 24,768;
Testaments, 15,100; Psalms, 719; other portions of
Scripture, 1,876; or, total, 42,463 Bibles or portions of
Scripture. Tracts and books (not pages, but separate
publications), 11,493,174.
Two large buildings have been erected, a third is in the
process of erection; the land on which they stand has been
purchased. The expense of the orphan work alone has
amounted to L133,528 sterling, and the expenses are daily
increasing.
The contributions by which these expenditures have been
met have been sent from every quarter of the globe. The
largest amounts have been, as might be expected, from
England, Scotland, Ireland, and Wales; but to these may be
added the Cape of Good Hope, Mt. Lebanon, Demerara,
Newport, R. I., New York, Philadelphia, California,
France, Holland, Sardinia, Australia, etc., etc.]
I have referred to Mr. Mueller as if he were the sole agent in this work.
This, however, is by no means true. His co-workers in the Institution
are all of the same spirit as himself. Mr. Craik, a gentleman from
Scotland, has been with him from the beginning, has shared in all the
labors and responsibilities of these vast undertakings, and has been
specially blessed as a preacher of the gospel. The remuneration of all
the assistants is contingent on the means received in answer to prayer.
When sacrifices are to be made, they are all prompt to make them, and
they do not expect an answer to prayer until they have contributed, from
their own scanty wages, whatever can be spared after providing for their
actual necessities.
The last Report of Mr. Mueller's labors has just been received. From this
we learn another interesting fact. It seems that the late revival in
Ireland is indirectly connected with these labors in Bristol. A pious
young Irishman read "The Dealings of the Lord with George Mueller," and
received from it new views of the power of believing prayer. He felt the
need of prayer for the perishing around him, and determined by prayer
and conversation to labor for their salvation. First, however, he asked
that God would give him an associate. This prayer was granted. These two
then united in earnest prayer for some additions to their number. This
prayer was granted. In this manner a small company was united in asking
for an outpouring of the Holy Spirit on their neighborhood. They devoted
themselves to prayer and to labor among the people by whom they were
surrounded. Their prayers were answered. The Spirit was poured out;
twenty-five souls were converted. Multitudes united with them in
supplication. They went from place to place, praying and laboring for
the conversion of men; and thus the work extended, until the whole
district of Ulster was visited with that remarkable outpouring of the
Holy Spirit.
All these we suppose to be indisputable facts. If in any respect there
has been a misstatement, or even an exaggeration, the means are abundant
for detecting it. The whole work has been carried on in the presence and
under the inspection of the whole city of Bristol. There stand those
large and expensive buildings. There are seen the seven hundred orphans
who are in every respect admirably cared for. Everything has been paid
for, for Mr. Mueller is never in debt. His poverty is well known, and he
will not accept of any money as a provision for his future necessities.
His accounts have been annually audited by a competent committee. There
is not the man living who can contradict his assertion, "I never asked
aid from a single individual." Hundreds weekly visit the Institution,
and no one has ever found in it anything at variance with Mr. Mueller's
published statements. Last of all, the Rev. Dr. Sawtelle, a gentleman
known to thousands in this country, has added his independent testimony
to the truth of all that is here related. More conclusive evidence to
the truth of facts cannot be desired.
To account for a fact is to refer it to some general law whose existence
is already established. When it is therefore asked, How shall these
facts be accounted for? we inquire, to what known law can they be
referred? They cannot certainly be referred to any known law of human
action. How would we decide if a similar case should occur in physics?
Suppose a series of experiments should be made daily for twenty-five
years in chemistry or mechanics, with the same invariable result, and
this result could be referred to no previously established law,--to what
conclusion should we arrive? There could be but one conclusion, in which
all men of science would unite. They would all declare that a new law
had been discovered, and would modify their systems accordingly. It
seems to me that on all sound philosophical principles we are bound to
come to the same conclusion in the present case. We can refer these
facts to no other law than to that announced by the Saviour in his
promise to answer the prayer of faith. There is no reason to suppose
that in the case of Mr. Mueller and his associates there is anything
exceptional or peculiar. What God has done for them we cannot doubt
that, under the same conditions, he will do for every other believing
disciple of Christ.
What, then, are the conditions of this remarkable experiment, if such we
may call it? They are something like the following. A poor and unknown
man is convinced that it is his duty, as a servant of Christ, to labor
in several ways for the relief of the temporal and spiritual wants of
the ignorant and destitute. He consecrates himself to the work by
dedicating to it his time and labor, and whatever pecuniary means should
come into his possession. He resolved that he would neither appeal to
any of the ordinary motives which dispose men to humanity, nor even
solicit aid from any human being, but simply make his wants known to
God, believing that, if he was doing the work of God, the divine
promise was pledged in his behalf. Not only did he trust in God that
all the pecuniary aid which he needed would be furnished, but that, in
answer to prayer, all needed wisdom would be given him in the conduct of
his complicated and arduous undertakings. The result has met his most
sanguine expectations. The institution has increased to a most
magnificent charity, aside from its missionary, Bible, and tract
operations; all its wants have been from time to time supplied; and it
is at the present moment carried on upon precisely the same principles
on which it commenced. We cannot resist the conclusion that if any one
will undertake any other Christian work in a similar spirit, and on the
same principles, his labor will be attended with a similar result.
While we believe this, however, we do not pretend to affirm that just
such immediate results will always be seen. This would be to limit the
omniscience of God by the short-sighted ignorance of man. It may best
suit the purposes of infinite goodness to answer the prayer of faith by
crosses and disappointments; but these in the end shall be found in the
most signal manner to promote the object to be accomplished. While the
disciples were praying and laboring for the extension of the kingdom of
Christ in Jerusalem, it seemed a strange answer to prayer that they
should be driven out of the city; but the meaning of it was evident when
churches arose in Phenice and Cyprus and Antioch, and it became manifest
that the gospel was designed not for Jews alone; but for the whole
family of man. Paul devoted himself with unquenchable zeal to the
salvation of men, and, with a fervid eloquence which has given him a
place among the noblest orators of antiquity, delighted to spend his
life in persuading men to be reconciled to God. He was a man whose
confidence in God was as unshaken as any whose history has been recorded
by the pen of inspiration. It doubtless was to the disciples of that
age, as well as to himself, a most unaccountable dispensation that he
should have been impeded in his great work by the necessity of composing
dissensions and rectifying errors which were constantly arising in the
churches which he had planted, and, most of all, that so many years of
his life should have been spent in prison. Yet it is to these, at the
time untoward circumstances, that we owe the writing of those epistles
which occupy so large a portion of the volume of inspiration, and
without which the message of God to man would not have been completed.
In no other way could his prayer to be useful to the cause of Christ
have been so fully answered.
With this understanding of the promise granted to the prayer of faith, I
do not see why we should not take the case of Mr. Mueller as an example
for our imitation. Whoever attains to this same simple desire in all
things to do the will of God, and to the same childlike trust in his
promises, may, I think, hope for a similar blessing. God is no respecter
of persons. "If _any_ man _do his will_, him he heareth." And all the
teaching of the Scriptures confirms us in this belief. The passages
which we have quoted at the commencement of this paper, with hundreds of
others, all lead to the same conclusion. In the Scriptures every form of
illustration is used to impress upon us the conviction that God is
indeed our Father, and that he delights to grant our requests for
anything that is for our benefit, and specially that he pledges himself
to direct by his counsel, and aid by his providence, every one who
honestly labors to promote the cause of true benevolence and real
religion.
If this be so, how important is this subject in its bearing on
individual effort. No Christian, though the poorest and humblest, ever
need despair of doing a noble work for God. He need never wait until he
can obtain the co-operation of the multitude or the wealthy. Let him
undertake what he believes to be his duty, on ever so small a scale, and
look directly to God for aid and direction. If it be a seed which God
has planted, it will take root, grow, and bear fruit, "_having seed
within itself_." "It is better to trust in God than to put confidence in
man; it is better to trust in God than to put confidence in princes." A
multitude of cases can be adduced to prove that this course is in
harmony with the designs of God. It is abundantly shown in the case of
Mr. Mueller. Take the case of Robert Raikes. Suppose that he had
established no school until a powerful association, formed from
ecclesiastical dignitaries, millionaires, and the multitude, had united
in his support, his effort could hardly have escaped ridiculous failure.
On the contrary, he simply established a school by himself. It was a
seed which God had planted, and its fruit now shakes like Lebanon.
On the contrast which is seen between the plan of Mr. Mueller and the
plans by which our missionary and other benevolent operations are
conducted, it is unnecessary to enlarge. If Mr. Mueller is right, I think
it is evident that we are all wrong. We cannot go into this subject in
detail. We may, however, be permitted to remark, that the means which
are frequently employed to secure the approbation and pecuniary aid of
worldly men, in carrying forward the cause of Christ, are intensely
humiliating. It would seem as though God was the last being to be relied
on in carrying forward the work which he has given us to do.
But it is time to bring these remarks to a close. We commend this most
unpretending of narratives to the thoughtful consideration of Christians
of all denominations. We have greatly overrated the teaching of these
facts, if they do not furnish strong incentives to A LIFE OF HOLY
EXERTION, AND IMPART AN UNWONTED AND POWERFUL MOTIVE TO EARNEST AND
BELIEVING PRAYER.
PROVIDENCE, December 17, 1860.
THE LIFE OF TRUST.
CHAPTER I.
BOYHOOD AND YOUTH.
1805-1825.
BIRTH--EARLY DISHONESTY--INSENSIBILITY--CONFIRMATION IN THE
STATE CHURCH--DISSOLUTENESS OF LIFE--THE HARD WAY OF
TRANSGRESSORS--THE GYMNASIUM AT NORDHAUSEN--THE UNIVERSITY
AT HALLE--ROVINGS.
I was born at Kroppenstaedt, near Halberstadt, in the kingdom of
Prussia, September 27, 1805. In January, 1810, my parents removed to
Heimersleben, about four miles from Kroppenstaedt, where my father was
appointed collector in the excise.
My father, who educated his children on worldly principles,[11] gave us
much money, considering our age. The result was, that it led me and my
brother into many sins. Before I was ten years old, I repeatedly took of
the government money which was intrusted to my father, and which he had
to make up; till one day, as he had repeatedly missed money, he
detected my theft, by depositing a counted sum in the room where I was,
and leaving me to myself for a while. Being thus left alone, I took some
of the money, and hid it under my foot in my shoe. When my father, after
his return, had counted and missed the money, I was searched and my
theft detected.
[Footnote 11: The opinion is often entertained that persons who
become eminent for power in prayer and nearness of communion with
God, owe their attainments to natural excellence of character, or
to peculiarly favoring circumstances of early education. The
narrative of the youth of Mueller exhibits the fallaciousness of
this view, and shows that the attainments which he made are within
the reach of any one who will "ask of God, that giveth to _all men
liberally_ and upbraideth not."--ED.]
When I was between ten and eleven years of age I was sent to
Halberstadt, there to be prepared for the university; for my father's
desire was that I should become a clergyman; not, indeed, that thus I
might serve God, but that I might have a comfortable living. My time was
now spent in studying, reading novels, and indulging, though so young,
in sinful practices. Thus it continued till I was fourteen years old,
when my mother was suddenly removed. The night she was dying, I, not
knowing of her illness, was playing at cards till two in the morning,
and on the next day, being the Lord's day, I went with some of my
companions in sin to a tavern, and then we went about the streets half
intoxicated.
This bereavement made no lasting impression on my mind. I grew worse and
worse. Three or four days before I was confirmed, and thus admitted to
partake of the Lord's Supper, I was guilty of gross immorality; and the
very day before my confirmation, when I was in the vestry with the
clergyman to confess my sins, after a formal manner, I defrauded him;
for I handed over to him only the twelfth part of the fee which my
father had given me for him. In this state of heart, without prayer,
without true repentance, without faith, without knowledge of the plan of
salvation, I was confirmed, and took the Lord's Supper, on the Sunday
after Easter, 1820. Yet I was not without some feeling about the
solemnity of the thing, and stayed at home in the afternoon and evening,
whilst the other boys and girls, who had been confirmed with me, walked
about in the fields.
My time till midsummer, 1821, was spent partly in study, but in a great
degree in playing the piano-forte and guitar, reading novels,
frequenting taverns, forming resolutions to become different, yet
breaking them almost as fast as they were made. My money was often spent
on my sinful pleasures, through which I was now and then brought into
trouble, so that once, to satisfy my hunger, I stole a piece of coarse
bread, the allowance of a soldier who was quartered in the house where I
lodged.
At midsummer, 1821, my father obtained an appointment at Schoenebeck,
near Magdeburg, and I embraced the opportunity of entreating him to
remove me to the cathedral classical school of Magdeburg; for I thought
that if I could but leave my companions in sin, and get out of certain
snares, and be placed under other tutors, I should then live a different
life. My father consented, and I was allowed to leave Halberstadt, and
to stay at Heimersleben till Michaelmas. Being thus quite my own master,
I grew still more idle, and lived as much as before in all sorts of sin.
When Michaelmas came, I persuaded my father to leave me at Heimersleben
till Easter, and to let me read the classics with a clergyman living in
the same place. I was now living on the premises belonging to my father,
under little real control, and intrusted with a considerable sum of
money, which I had to collect for my father, from persons who owed it to
him. My habits soon led me to spend a considerable part of this money,
giving receipts for different sums, yet leaving my father to suppose I
had not received them.
In November, I went on a pleasure excursion to Magdeburg, where I spent
six days in much sin, and though my absence from home had been found out
by my father before I returned from thence, yet I took all the money I
could obtain, and went to Brunswick, after I had, through a number of
lies, obtained permission from my tutor. I spent a week at Brunswick,
in an expensive hotel. At the end of the week my money was expended. I
then went, without money, to another hotel, in a village near Brunswick,
where I spent another week in an expensive way of living. At last, the
owner of the hotel, suspecting that I had no money, asked for payment,
and I was obliged to leave my best clothes as security. I then walked
about six miles, to Wolfenbuttel, went to an inn, and began again to
live as if I had plenty of money. On the second or third morning I went
quietly out of the yard, and then ran off; but being suspected and
observed, and therefore seen to go off, I was immediately called after,
and so had to return. I was arrested, and being suspected to be a thief,
was examined for about three hours, and then sent to jail. I now found
myself, at the age of sixteen, an inmate of the same dwelling with
thieves and murderers. I was locked up in this place day and night,
without permission to leave my cell.
I was in prison from Dec. 18, 1821, till January 12, 1822, when the
keeper told me to go with him to the police office. Here I found that
the commissioner before whom I had been tried, had acquainted my father
with my conduct; and thus I was kept in prison till my father sent the
money which was needed for my travelling expenses, to pay my debt in the
inn, and for my maintenance in the prison. So ungrateful was I now for
certain little kindnesses shown to me by a fellow-prisoner, that,
although I had promised to call on his sister, to deliver a message from
him, I omitted to do so; and so little had I been benefited by this, my
chastisement, that, though I was going home to meet an angry father,
only two hours after I had left the town where I had been imprisoned, I
chose an avowedly wicked person as my travelling companion for a great
part of my journey.
My father, who arrived two days after I had reached Heimersleben, after
having severely beaten me, took me home to Schoenebeck, intending, at
Easter, to send me to a classical school at Halle, that I might be under
strict discipline and the continual inspection of a tutor. Easter came,
and I easily persuaded him to let me stay at home till Michaelmas. But
after that period he would not consent to my remaining any longer with
him, and I left home, pretending to go to Halle to be examined. But
having a hearty dislike to the strict discipline of which I had heard, I
went to Nordhausen, and had myself examined to be received into that
school. I then went home, but never told my father a word of all this
deception till the day before my departure, which obliged me to invent a
whole chain of lies. He was then very angry; but at last, through my
entreaties and persuasion, he gave way and allowed me to go. This was in
October, 1822.
I continued at Nordhausen two years and six months. During this time I
studied with considerable diligence the Latin classics, French, history,
my own language, etc.; but did little in Hebrew, Greek, and the
mathematics. I lived in the house of the director, and got, through my
conduct, highly into his favor, so much so that I was held up by him in
the first class as an example to the rest. I used now to rise regularly
at four, winter and summer, and generally studied all the day, with
little exception, till ten at night.
But whilst I was thus outwardly gaining the esteem of my
fellow-creatures, I did not care in the least about God, but lived
secretly in much sin, in consequence of which I was taken ill, and for
thirteen weeks confined to my room. During my illness I had no real
sorrow of heart, yet, being under certain natural impressions of
religion, I read through Klopstock's works without weariness. I cared
nothing about the word of God. I had about three hundred books of my
own, but no Bible. Now and then I felt that I ought to become a
different person, and I tried to amend my conduct, particularly when I
went to the Lord's Supper, as I used to do twice every year, with the
other young men. The day previous to attending that ordinance, I used to
refrain from certain things; and on the day itself I was serious, and
also swore once or twice to God, with the emblem of the broken body in
my mouth, to become better, thinking that for the oath's sake I should
be induced to reform. But after one or two days were over, all was
forgotten, and I was as bad as before.
At Easter, 1825, I became a member of the University of Halle, and that
with very honorable testimonials. I thus obtained permission to preach
in the Lutheran Establishment; but I was as truly unhappy and as far
from God as ever. I had made strong resolutions now at last to change my
course of life, for two reasons: first, because, without it, I thought
no parish would choose me as their pastor; and secondly, that without a
considerable knowledge of divinity I should never get a good living. But
the moment I entered Halle, the university town, all my resolutions came
to nothing. Being now more than ever my own master, I renewed my
profligate life afresh, though now a student of _divinity_. Yet in the
midst of it all I had a desire to renounce this wretched life, for I had
no enjoyment in it, and had sense enough left to see that the end, one
day or other, would be miserable. But I had no sorrow of heart on
account of offending God.
One day, when I was in a tavern with some of my wild fellow-students, I
saw among them one of my former school-fellows, named Beta, whom I had
known four years before at Halberstadt, but whom at that time I had
despised, because he was so quiet and serious. It now appeared well to
me to choose him as my friend, thinking that, if I could but have better
companions, I should by that means improve my own conduct. "_Cursed be
the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm._"
This Beta was a backslider. When formerly he was so quiet at school, I
have reason to believe it was because the Spirit of God was working on
his heart; but now, having departed from the Lord, he tried to put off
the ways of God more and more, and to enjoy the world of which he had
known but little before. _I_ sought his friendship, because I thought it
would lead me to a steady life; and _he_ gladly formed an acquaintance
with me, as he told me afterwards, because he thought it would bring him
into gay society.
At the commencement of August, Beta and I, with two other students,
drove about the country for four days. When we returned, instead of
being truly sorry on account of this sin, we thought of fresh pleasures;
and as my love for travelling was stronger than ever, through what I had
seen on this last journey, I proposed to my friends to set off for
Switzerland. The obstacles in the way, the want of money, and the want
of the passports, were removed by _me_. For, through forged letters from
our parents, we procured passports, and through pledging all we could,
particularly our books, we obtained as much money as we thought would be
enough. Forty-three days we were day after day travelling, almost always
on foot.
I had now obtained the desire of my heart. I had seen Switzerland. But
still I was far from being happy. I was on this journey like Judas; for,
having the common purse, I was a thief. I managed so that the journey
cost me but two thirds of what it cost my friends. I had, by many lies,
to satisfy my father concerning the travelling expenses. During the
three weeks I stayed at home, I determined to live differently for the
future. I was different for a few days; but when the vacation was over,
and fresh students came, and, with them, fresh money, all was soon
forgotten.