_Guest._ "WAITER! I SAY--THIS IS PORK! I WANT MUTTON!"
_Waiter_ (_rather bustled_). "YES SOR IT'S MUTTON YE _WANT_--BUT
IT'S PORK YE'LL _HAVE!_"]
* * * * *
OF COURSE.--Directly it was known that Sir WILLIAM
HARCOURT had accepted an invitation to contest West Monmouthshire,
and that Mr. WARMINGTON had generously offered to retire
in his favour, there was a rush for the evident joke of styling
the self-effacing Q.C. "Mr. WARMINGPAN." It is uncertain
which paper was the first to get the Warmingpan into its sheets. Sir
WILLIAM did not find the vacated seat too hot to hold him.
Just nice.
* * * * *
NEW TITLES.--Sir HENRY LOCH is created Baron
LOCH of Drylaw. The title will be appropriately written out
on parchment. For was there ever a more dry-as-dust title than that of
a Barren Loch and Dry Law!! Mr. STERN comes to the front as
Baron WANDSWORTH: not of Wandsworth Common, "and so," as a
Shakspearian clown might say, "the title is uncommon." Finally
Cock a doodle doo!
Lord HOUGHTON'S Earl of Crewe!
being, evidently, the living representative of SHAKSPEARE'S
"Early Village Cock."
* * * * *