Miss Kezia, to her own amazement, found herself obeying the strenuous
voice, the note of real agony. As she hesitated outside the door she
heard a sudden storm of sobs--a breathless, wild weeping, a smothered
wail of woe. And she walked softly away, her face flushed, as if she had
been guilty of some meanness. She stood inside her room awhile, then
went back. She paused outside the door; all was silent. She turned the
handle clumsily and went in. Sheila Pat lay in her bed, quiet and
still; but Miss Kezia knew she was not asleep.
"I've fetched my red wool for the border," she said, and she told the
falsehood--a thing abhorred of her rigid conscientiousness--with a
ringing cheerfulness.
Nell came in presently with a bowl of bread and milk. The Atom sat up
listlessly.
"Aunt Kezia has been very patient," she said gravely. "Nell, _please_
need I have any?" She leant her head against Nell's arm, and her
fingers squeezed it lovingly.
"Just a little, sweet. Has she slept at all, Aunt Kezia?
"No. Perhaps she will after her bread and milk."
But she didn't. And as the evening wore on her temperature rose; her
little burning face grew more desperate. She began to talk, feverishly,
excitedly. Dr. Everton called again. He gave a few directions, and
urged them to keep her mind as quiet as possible.
"Her temperature is very high. She hardly knows what she is saying. I
believe she has something on her mind. I will call early to-morrow
morning. No talk, please; she _must_ be kept quiet."
"Nell, people never want to kill theirselves in Ireland, do they?
There's not a bad old monnyment there. It had three hundred million
steps. The man said so. It was _very_ high, you see, and I was glad,
because I thought I'd be able to see over all the roofs, and I thought
I'd see the sea and a blue mist and Ireland shinin' out--all green--oh,
I want to go home, Nell! I want to go home!" She broke out into
pitiful crying, too bad now to fight any longer.
"You shall soon--you shall soon--" Nell's arms were round her; her
voice choked.
"I want to go now! S'pose I'm dead before mother and dad come
back?--All green--and cool--I'm all scorchin', but I wouldn't be
there--Oh, I want to go home! I want just to _look_ at it!--I'll come
back quite quick--I b'lieve I'll _die_ if I don't go!--Molly O'Rourke
died, because she went to America. I'll die, too--I'm all _sick_
inside--" She shook all over with sobs; her voice rose to a wail of
utter woe. "I _must_ see it--all green--and the colt--oh, he can
go--he'll be a fine horse, miss, entirely--look at the legs of him
already!--Where's the sugar, then, you bad boy? _He_ knows!--All dirt
and smoke and houses--and houses--and a great big monnyment where people
kill theirselves. Nell, where are you? _Nell_--I b'lieve you're
throwin' yourself off the monnyment--"
She quieted down a little; her body shook with deep, silent sobs. She
began whispering to herself.
"If I could just see you--just for one minute--just walk 'long on the
grass--by the stream--and up the Kilsparran hill--and go and see
Biddy--with the turf smokin' in my eyes--and smell it--" Then she broke
out crying again.
"I want to go home! I want to go home!"
Nell tried to soothe her. She was trembling herself; but the Atom's
little body was torn and shaken with her awful weeping. She clung to
Nell, crying out pitifully that she must go home--she must go home.
"I can't bear it any longer--I'm stiflin'--_please_--just to let me
_feel_ it--I'll come back--so good--oh, _please_--I must go home! Oh, I
want to go home! Where's Denis? I want Denis--"
"I'll go and fetch him, dear. Will you wait?"
She went out on to the landing. He was walking up and down: he turned
quickly.
She shut the door quietly, and went to meet him. Her face was quite
white; when she spoke, her voice shook.
"She wants you. She--she's crying for home--" Her lips quivered so
that she could not go on. "I can't quiet her. She's--oh, I can't stand
it, Denis!" She broke into sudden passionate tears.
"Don't cry, old girl. I'll see if I can quiet her."
He went into the room. Sheila Pat was crouched up on her bed, moaning:
"I want to go home! I want to go home!"
She lifted her head, and her heavy eyes leapt to his with a wild gleam
of hope. She stretched out her arms; she was shaking all over.
"Denis--oh, Denis--I want to go home!"
He put his arms round her.
"Try to be good, Atom--try to be quiet, and go to sleep." His face
worked; he bit his lip. "You'll go--some day," he said huskily.
"Let me go now---I'll be so good--I won't stay a minute--if I can see
it--just _feel_ it--and smell it--oh, Denis--Denis--I want to go home!"
"You shall go, Atom."
There was a sudden breathless lull. She gave a little shiver.
"I--I didn't quite hear--" she whispered hoarsely.
He glanced, his blue eyes desperate, across at Nell, then down at the
wild, incredulous little face upturned to his. His eyes cleared, grew
deeply tender.
"I said that you shall go." His voice was clear, firm. "Directly your
cold has gone I will take you across for a few days if you still want to
go."
She dropped suddenly forward against his chest.
"Please hold me." Her faint little whisper told of sudden ineffable
peace.
They wrapped her in blankets, and he took her into his arms and walked
up and down the room with her. She pulled her arm out of the coverings
and stroked his cheek with a gesture almost of adoration.
"I don't think," a sudden passionate whisper came from her, "God _can_
be quite so nice as you!"
Up and down he went.
"Try to go to sleep, Atom."
"Yes, Denis."
Presently she started trembling.
"Denis?"
"Yes, acushla."
"Have--have I been asleep?"
"No."
"--I didn't _dream_ that you--you said--"
"I said that when your cold is better, I will take you home for a few
days."
She gave a little wriggle and a snuggle of utter joy.
"I was 'fraid I'd dreamt it."
"Denis, _would_ you mind keep sayin' it every now and then?"
Nell sat by the fire and watched him tramp the room. Once Molly peeped
round the door, but was frowned away. Once he tried to lay her down, but
she objected with drowsy terror.
"_Hold_, me, Denis! Say it again!"
Presently.
"Denis, if we took all the poor mad people to Ireland, wouldn't they get
better, and not want to kill theirselves any more?--Please just say it
again."
"Where's Nell? I want to say good night to her."
Nell came and kissed her softly.
"Poor Nell--may she come, too, Denis?--All green--and cool--I--I can
most smell it already--I like lying my cheek on the
grass--like--this--it's so--cool--it smells--all--wet--Please--say
it--again."
Up and down the room he went, while she slept in his arms. Nell signed
to him to put her down, but he glanced down at the small white face in
the blankets, and shook his head.
But at last he put her into her bed, and covered her up. For a minute
they stood waiting, but Sheila Pat lay still, her breathing soft and
regular.
Denis turned to Nell; he put his hand on her shoulder, marched her out
of the room, and into the Stronghold.
Molly was there, frightened and sleepy.
"She's all right now. Fast asleep. Go to bed, old girl."
"It's been such a horrid day--is she really better?"
"Yes. I hope she'll be all right to-morrow. Scoot."
Molly went yawning out of the room.