_Question._ On what occasions do you particularly seek the studios?
_Answer._ On two Sundays in the year--the consecutive sabbaths devoted
to the exhibition of proposed academy pictures by "Outsiders," and
"A.'s," and "R.A.'s."
_Q._ Do you haunt the abodes of artists at other times?
_A._ Never; or, to cover all possibilities, hardly ever.
_Q._ Then you are not a lover of paintings for their own sake?
_A._ Certainly not; on the contrary, I am, as a rule, a better judge
of frames than canvases.
_Q._ Then why do you go to St. John's Wood, Chelsea and West
Kensington?
_A._ To see and be seen.
_Q._ Is it necessary to know the artist whose pictures are "on view"?
_A._ Certainly not. You can usually single him out by the absence
of an overcoat, and can generally spot his wife and daughter by the
non-appearance of promenading head-gear.
_Q._ What have you to do when you have discovered your involuntary
host and hostess?
_A._ To shake hands with them with condescension, and partake of their
refreshments with gusto.
_Q._ Will this invasion of the domestic circle be resented?
_A._ No; because it is highly probable that you will be mistaken for
a newspaper Art critic, and respect for the Press in Art circles is
universal.
_Q._ Are not artists, as a body, a community of highly accomplished
gentlemen?
_A._ Certainly; and, consequently, on ordinary occasions entitled to
well-merited respect.
_Q._ Then why should that "well-merited respect" be refused to them a
month before the May opening of Burlington House?
_A._ Because it is the fashion.
_Q._ Surely this fashion does not exist amongst the better classes of
the community?
_A._ To some extent; although it certainly is in greatest favour with
cads and snobs, to say nothing of their female relations.
_Q._ Has any effort been made to stem this tide of unauthorised and
unwelcome invasion?
_A._ In isolated cases the master of the studio has sought the
protection of the police to keep his studio free of the unknown and
the unknowable.
_Q._ But could not the scandal be removed with the assistance of the
leaders of Society?
_A._ Assuredly. It would only have to become unfashionable to visit
studios on the Show Sundays for the painter to be left at peace.
_Q._ Would that be pleasing to the artists?
_A._ That is the published opinion, but the matter has not been put
absolutely to the test. However, the pleasure of the artists is not
to be considered when the recreations of Brixton and Tooting are at
stake.
* * * * *