_Driver (of the Herring Mould, to Party inclining to embonpoint)._
"HOLLO, BILL! HOW MANY SACKS O' PERTATERS AND HOGSHEADS O' SUGAR 'AVE
YER GOT THERE?"]
[Illustration: _THE SUBURBAN FLYMAN._
_Maid._ "OH, COACHMAN! MISSUS SAY, YOU'RE TO COVER YOURSELF WITH THIS
RUG, AND NOT TO MOVE OFF THE BOX; BECAUSE YOUR GAITERS AND LEGS AND
THINGS ARE REALLY SO VERY SHOCKING."]
[Illustration: _A DAY'S AMUSEMENT._
_Driving Lady (loq.)_ "OH, FRANK DEAR, ONLY FANCY, GEORGE HAS GOT
SO TIPSY AT THE ARCHERY MEETING, THAT WE'VE BEEN OBLIGED TO PUT HIM
INSIDE, AND DRIVE HOME OURSELVES--AND POOR CLARA HAS PINCHED HER
FINGERS DREADFULLY PUTTING ON THE DRAG COMING DOWN BLUNSDEN HILL."]
[Illustration: _AWFUL TALE OF AN EEL._]
[Illustration: _A LITTLE SCENE AT BRUSSELS._
_T·mpk·ns (who has just come down to breakfast)._ "HERE! I SAY,
GARSONG! I WANT A KELKCHOSE FOR DEJEWNAY! DER KORFEE, AND DES HOOFS,
YOU KNOW!"
(_N.B. The Stout Party T. pokes in the ribs is a wealthy Belgian
Swell!_)]
[Illustration: _FOR-RAD--FOR-RAD--AWAY!_
_Mr. Wuzzel (who the last time he weighed was Nineteen Stone, a sack
of Guano, and a Barrowful of Bricks)._ "'FOR-RAD--AWAY!' OH, YES!
THAT'S ALL VERY WELL--BUT NOT WITH THE COUNTRY(?) AS HEAVY AS THIS!"]
[Illustration: _VERY MUCH AT SEA._]
[Illustration: _FREAKS OF A PET DOG._
_Gardener (triumphantly)._ "THAT DOG'S BEEN AND GONE AND DONE IT NOW,
MA'AM, I THINK!"]
[Illustration: _A STREET FIGHT._
_Wife of his Bussum (to Vanquished Hero)._ "TERENCE, YE GREAT
UMMADAWN, WHAT DO YER GIT INTO THIS THRUBBLE FOR?"
_Vanquished Hero (to Wife of his Bussum)._ "D'YE CALL IT THRUBBLE,
NOW? WHY, IT'S ENGYEMENT!"]
[Illustration: _THE LOWEST DEPTH._
_Inebriated Snob (to party with paper lamp)._ "WHICH IS THE
WAY--TO--TO--THE P--P--POSES PLASTIQUES? WHY, HALLO! IS THAT YOU, JIM?
HOW THE DOOCE DID YOU COME TO THIS?"
_Jim._ "WELL--ALL ALONG O' THEM NIGHT PUBLICS. AND HERE I AM--AN
'ILLUMINATED ADVERTISEMENT'!"]
[Illustration: _LIKE UNTO LIKE._
_Bacon Fancier._ "THERE, NOW!--THAT'S MY STYLE!"]
[Illustration: _BEAR-BAITING._]
[Illustration: _A LITTLE BIT OF YORKSHIRE._
_Horse Critic._ "WELL, WILLIAM, THAT'S A NICE-LOOKING COLT, WHOSE IS
IT?"
_Horse Breaker._ "WELL, SIR, THAT DEPENDS UPON CIRCUMSTANCES."
_Critic._ "HOW SO?"
_Breaker._ "IF IT TURNS OUT WELL, IT BELONGS TO MR. B. (_the
Steward_); BUT YOU KNOW, SIR _(with a sly look)_, IF IT TURNS OUT BAD,
IT BELONGS TO MY LORD."]
[Illustration: _ANXIOUS TO PRESERVE OUR FIGURE, WE TAKE A TURKISH
BATH!_]
[Illustration: _HOW TO BOTHER CABBY._
_Fare._ "HOW MUCH? NOW I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SAY!
'YOU'LL LEAVE IT TO ME,' BUT I WON'T HAVE IT. _I'LL LEAVE IT TO YOU!_"]
[Illustration: _SUPERFLUOUS ADVICE._
"DON'T CHECK HER, JACK; GIVE HER HER HEAD."]
[Illustration: _A FURNITURE REMOVAL AGENCY._
THINGS HAVE COME TO A PRETTY PASS INDEED, WHEN A DRAWING-ROOM TABLE
JUMPS UP, AND AFTER PLAYING A TUNE ON ITS ACCORDION, OFFERS ITS HAND
TO THE HOUSEMAID!----
(NOW, WITHOUT ANY OF THE GAMMON OF PUTTING LIGHTS OUT, AND DARKENING
THE ROOM, THIS REALLY DID HAPPEN IN BROAD DAYLIGHT--YOU NEEDN'T
BELIEVE IT, OF COURSE, UNLESS YOU LIKE.)]
[Illustration: _THE FANCY FAIR._
_Eleanor._ "YOU HAD BETTER BUY SOME OF MY CIGARS--COME, TAKE ONE!"
_Young Swell._ "A--A--THANKS, NO--I NEVER SMOKE!"
_Eleanor._ "WHAT! NOT IF I BITE OFF THE END?"]
[Illustration: _AN AFFLICTED ONE._
JOHN CHINAMAN WEEPING OVER HIS TAIL.]
[Illustration: _COUNTRY RACES.--AMATEUR PROFESSIONALS._
_Starter._ "YOU'D BETTER BE GOING, SIR; ITS A START!"
_Gentleman Rider._ "OH, I'M ORDERED TO RIDE A WAITING RACE, AND I MAY
AS WELL WAIT HERE AS ANYWHERE ELSE!"]
[Illustration: _AN IDEA FOR A WET DAY._
HANG UP THE CRINOLINES, AND HAVE A GAME OF CROQUET IN THE
DINING-ROOM.]
[Illustration: _A STUDY OF CRINOLINE._
_Dreadful Boy._ "MY EYE, TOMMY, IF I CAN'T SEE THE OLD GAL'S LEGS
THROUGH THE PEEP-HOLES!"]
[Illustration: _MOST FLATTERING!_
_Miss Stout._ "YOU SEE, DEAR, I THOUGHT YOUR SWISS DRESS SO PRETTY,
THAT I HAVE MADE ONE EXACTLY LIKE IT. WHY, WE SHALL BE TAKEN FOR
SISTERS!"]
[Illustration: _A HOT CHESTNUT IS VERY GOOD AFTER DINNER, BUT NOT JUST
AS THE FOX BREAKS._
_Rough Rider._ "BY YER LEAVE, SIR! MY YOUNG HORSE RUSHES SO IF HE'S
KEPT WAITING!"]
[Illustration: _SCENE--THE ROW._
JEMIMER HANN IS STARING AT SOLDIER--YOUNG SPOFFINGTON IS BOWING
TO GEORGINA MARTINGALE--PERAMBULATOR CHARGES THROUGH YOUNG S.'S
LEGS.--SENSATION!]
[Illustration: _THE DOG-DAYS!_
_1st Fancier._ "NOW ISN'T HE, GEORGIE!--FOR BREED AND SHAPE AND MAKE,
THE MOST LOVELY LITTLE CREATURE?"
_2nd Ditto._ "WELL, DEAR, HE CERTAINLY IS VERY HANDSOME, BUT TO MY
TASTE MY LITTLE TREASURE PUGGY IS PERFECTION, AND SO AFFECTIONATE!"
_3rd Ditto._ "DID THEY PRAISE THE OTHER DOGS?--LITTLE CHARLIE WAS A
DARLING; HE WAS, HE WAS, HE WAS!!!"]
[Illustration: _THE WIRE FENCE._
(_Dedicated to those Farmers and others in the Shires, who use that
treacherous and unsportsmanlike contrivance._)]
[Illustration: _A TABLE D'HÔTE AT PARIS._
_Attentive Swell (to elegant and fascinating American Young Lady, who
has been monopolising the adjacent Gentlemen all through Dinner)._
"LET ME GIVE YOU SOME OF THIS" (_handing Article of Dessert_).
_Belle Américaine._ "NO, THANKS!--WELL, THEN, A VERY LITTLE; FOR _I
GUESS I'M PRETTY CROWDED NOW_."
(_Horror of Swells; triumph of neighbouring Female British
Contingent._)]
[Illustration: _A FATUOUS FASHION._
TO SIT UPON A CHAIR, AND HAVE ONE'S HORSE HELD, IS NOW A VEWY
FASHIONABLE WAY OF WIDING IN "WOTTON WOW."]
[Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM, &c._--No. XVI.
_Mary._ "DID YOU CALL, MUM?"
_Lady._ "YES, MARY! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO WEAR YOUR HOOP BEFORE
YOU HAD DONE YOUR ROOMS, BECAUSE YOU BROKE THE JUGS AND BASINS WITH
IT!"
_Mary._ "OH, MUM! YOU SEE THE _SWEEPS_ WERE COMING THIS MORNING, AND,
REALLY, I COULD NOT THINK OF OPENING THE DOOR TO THEM SUCH A FIGGER AS
I SHOULD HA' BEEN WITHOUT MY CRINOLINE!"]
[Illustration: _BREAKING THE BYE-LAWS._
_Irritable Elderly Gentleman._ "HOLLO--HOY--CATCH THAT DOG! I'VE A
COMPLAINT--WHERE'S THE STATION-MASTER?--UNDER THE BYE-LAWS--IT'S A
DOG--HERE, I GIVE THIS MAN INTO CUSTODY."]
[Illustration: _THE COOK'S MORNING SERVICE._]
[Illustration: _STUDIES OF CRINOLINE DURING AN EQUINOCTIAL GALE._]
[Illustration: _HERO WORSHIP._
THE "KNEE PLUSH ULTRA" OF SENTIMENT.]
[Illustration: _A JOLLY GAME._]
[Illustration: _A FOREIGN INFLICTION._--No. I.
AT THE DOOR PATERFAMILIAS IS EXPOSTULATING WITH AN ORGAN-GRINDER, WHO
IS DEFYING HIM WITH EXTREME INSOLENCE, ALTERNATED WITH PERFORMANCES
ON THE INSTRUMENT OF TORTURE. POLICEMAN (UNSEEN) IS IN THE KITCHEN,
CONSIDERING WHETHER SUSAN'S COOKING OR MARY'S SAVINGS' BANK MONEY
WOULD BE THE BETTER INVESTMENT.]
[Illustration: No. II.
IN A BED-ROOM A MOTHER IS TENDING A SICK BOY, WHO IS SUFFERING FROM
NERVOUS FEVER.]
[Illustration: _PARTRIDGE SHOOTING._
_Keeper (who has never seen a breech-loader)._ "I DON'T THINK WERRY
MUCH OF 'IM; WHY HE'S BEEN AND BROKE HIS GUN THE WERRY FUST SHOT!"]
[Illustration: _RATHER OSSY._
_Dealer._ "THERE, SIR! HE'S A RARE TOPPED UN. WHY, WHAT A MANE AND
TAIL HE'S GOT! HE'D MAKE A CHARGER, HE WOULD!"
_Mr. Green._ "BUT AIN'T HIS LEGS A LITTLE TOO THIN FOR HIS BODY?"
_Dealer._ "THIN FOR HIS BODY! BLESS YER! YOU COME TO HACK HIM ABOUT
FOR A FEW DAYS, HIS LEGS 'LL _FILL OUT_ ENOUGH, THEY WILL!"]
[Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM IN AUSTRALIA.--A FACT._
_Domestic._ "IF YOU PLEASE, 'M, I HAVE AN HOUR TO SPARE, AND I'M A
GOIN' TO TRY MY NEW 'ORSE!"]
[Illustration: _A FANCY SCENE--WINNING THE GLOVES._
FROM THE GRAND PUGILISTIC BALLET OF THE FIGHT FOR THE CHAMPIONSHIP,
WHICH MIGHT, COULD, SHOULD, AND OUGHT TO BE PLAYED AT ONE OF THE
OPERAS.]
[Illustration: _COMPLIMENTARY._
_Farmer._ "MORNIN', MR. BLANK! NEVER SAW YOU GO SO WELL BEFORE."
_Mr. Blank._ "WHY, WHAT DO YER MEAN? WE'VE NEVER FOUND A FOX!"
_Farmer._ "AH! BUT I MEAN SO WELL FROM COVER TO COVER, YOU KNOW!"]
[Illustration: _PUTTING HIS FOOT IN IT._
MR. SPENCER POFFINGTON MAKES A MORNING CALL. HE WILL WEAR AN
EYE-GLASS--AND SKIPS LIKE LORD DUNDREARY--AND COMES TO GRIEF OVER A
CROQUET IRON, TAKING A HEADER INTO THE ARMS OF LADY HONORIA BOUNCER!]
[Illustration: _SCENE ON A BRIDGE IN PARIS._
NOW, WHAT DO YOU THINK IS THE MATTER HERE? WHY, ALPHONSE, IN A BOAT
ON THE RIVER, HAS JUST CAUGHT A GOUJON ABOUT THE SIZE OF HIS LITTLE
FINGER!]
[Illustration: _TU QUOQUE._
_Human._ "HAH! YOU'D BE A NICE CUSTOMER TO MEET ON THE LOOSE,
ANYWHERES AFTER DARK, YOU WOULD!"]
[Illustration: _AT SCARBOROUGH._]
[Illustration: _A SAGACIOUS CABBY._
"HANSOM, MISS! YES, MISS! CATTLE OR DOG SHOW?"]
[Illustration: _READY WHEN WANTED OUR MILITIA VOLUNTEERS._]
[Illustration: _IMPUDENCE._
_Old Gent._ "HOW MUCH?"
_Hansom Cabman (boldly)._ "SIX SHILLINGS, SIR!"
_Old Gent._ "WHAT! WHY HOW MANY MILES DO YOU CALL IT FROM TEMPLE BAR
TO THE BANK?"
_Cabman._ "OH! IF YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A MERE MERCAN-TILE TRANSACTION,
YOU SHALL HAVE YOUR RIDE FOR NOTHING. ONLY DON'T GIT INTO AN ANSOM CAB
AGAIN, THAT'S ALL."
(_Old Gentleman is speechless with indignation and astonishment._)]
[Illustration: _A DISTURBED IMAGINATION._
JONES, WHO CAN'T SLEEP WELL IN LONDON DURING THE HOT WEATHER, GOES TO
HAVE A QUIET NIGHT IN A VILLAGE!!
(_Portrait of one of the Village Cochins, &c._)]
[Illustration: _WHAT OUR VOLUNTEERS OUGHT_ NOT _TO DO._
THEY OUGHT NOT, FOR ONE THING, TO STAGGER THROUGH QUIET STREETS,
DRUMMING AND TRUMPETING LIKE SAVAGES, AT MIDNIGHT.]
[Illustration: _DRAMATIC._
_First languid Swell._ "HAW! THEY'RE GOING ON STILL WITH THAT
DUNDREARY!"
_Second Ditto._ "AW----YA'AS! IT MUST BE A--A--A--A--VEWY HARD WORK
FOR A FELLAH TO PERFORM SUCH A--A--CAWACTER EVEWY EVENING."]
[Illustration: _RETURN FROM THE RACES--BOIS DE BOULOGNE._
_English Stable boy (to his Pal)._ "I SAY, JONES, ISN'T IT A PITY
MOUNSEER HAS NOT GOT ANOTHER HAND FOR THE WHIP?"]
[Illustration: _SPIRIT-RAPPING._
_Mr. Dunup._ "I KNOW THAT KNOCK! IT IS! IT MUST BE! YES, IT IS A
CREDITOR!!"]
[Illustration: _THE GRAND NATIONAL ROSE SHOW._]
[Illustration: _THE BOX OF BOOKS FROM LONDON._
"NOW, CLARA--WHAT A SHAME! YOU ALWAYS TAKE THE PRETTY ONES!"]
[Illustration: _RAILWAY GRIEVANCE._
DREADFUL OLD FEMALE, WHO, ALTHOUGH SHE WOULD BE HORRIFIED AT THE IDEA
OF A CIGAR IN A CARRIAGE, SOLACES HERSELF BY CONSUMING NO END OF
PEPPERMINT LOZENGES DURING HER JOURNEY.]
[Illustration: _RETALIATION._
A CURE FOR THE BAWLING FISH-SELLERS AT WATERING-PLACES.]
[Illustration: _THE SUBMISSIVE HUSBAND._]
[Illustration: _A BROKEN COUNTRY._
_Jones (who has accepted a mount with the Harriers, because it is all
galloping and no obstacles)._ "OH, YES, LET HIM COME! THAT'S ALL VERY
WELL. WHY, IT'S LIKE THE SIDE OF A HOUSE."]
[Illustration: _WHICH IS THE BRUTE?_
UPON ONE OF THESE CREATURES MR. RAREY'S METHOD CAN MAKE NO IMPRESSION.]
[Illustration: _"WHEN DOCTORS DISAGREE," ETC., ETC._]
[Illustration: _THE MORAL OF IT._
_Infuriate Captain._ "YOU SCOUNDREL, I'LL HAVE YOU UP AS SURE AS YOU
ARE BORN!"
_Cabby._ "WHAT! SUMMONS ME! OH, NO, YOU WON'T, MY LORD.--YOU'LL NEVER
TAKE THE TROUBLE."
(_Exit_ CABBY _with three-and-sixpence over his fare._)]
[Illustration: _CRINOLINE FOR DOMESTIC USE._
_Missus._ "MARY! GO AND TAKE OFF THAT THING DIRECTLY! PRAY, ARE YOU
AWARE WHAT A RIDICULOUS OBJECT YOU ARE?"]
[Illustration: _BADLY HIT DURING THE RECENT ENGAGEMENT WITH THE
GUARDS._
_Mamma._ "YES, DOCTOR. SHE WILL SIT FOR HOURS WITHOUT SPEAKING A
WORD. SHE PERSISTS IN WEARING THE SAME DRESS, AND WON'T PART WITH THE
BOUQUET!"
_Doctor._ "H'M--WELL, LET'S SEE, WE MUST FIRST GET _THE BALL OUT OF
HER HEAD_, AND THEN PERHAPS THE NERVOUS SYSTEM MAY RIGHT ITSELF!"]
[Illustration: _A SPIRIT DRAWING. BY OUR OWN MEDIUM._]
[Illustration: _SKETCHES AT BRIGHTON._]
[Illustration: _BRIGHTON JEWELS._]
[Illustration: _A BIT OF HOUSEHOLD STUFF._
_Second Life Guardsman._ "LOR, JEMIMER, WHY WE ARE OUR OWN MASTERS,
AND NEVER SHOW NO RESPECT TO NOBODY!"
_Jemimer._ "THEN I SUPPOSE YOU'VE SEEN A DEAL OF BATTLES THAT MAKES
YOU SO PROUD!"]
[Illustration: _A HINT TO THE "ENGAGED ONES" OF ENGLAND._
_Alice (to Rodolph, or rather, we should say, Jones)._ "NOW MIND,
SIR! YOU ARE A VOLUNTEER RIFLEMAN, AND IT ENTIRELY DEPENDS UPON YOUR
ATTENTION TO DRILL, WHETHER I GIVE YOU THAT LOCK OF HAIR, OR NOT!"]
[Illustration: _VERY CONSIDERATE._
_Mamma (coming down the steps)._ "WHY, CORNBYN! WHAT'S THE MEANING OF
THIS? MISS ALICE PERCHED ON HER PAPA'S BIG HORSE, AND THE PONY BROUGHT
FOR ME!"
_Cornbyn._ "YES, MA'AM! YOU SEE, MA'AM, MISS ALICE SAID AS YOU WAS
RATHER NERVOUS, AND SHE THOUGHT THAT YOU WOULD GET ON BETTER WITH TOM
TIT."]
[Illustration: _RECREATION FOR THE HORSE GUARDS._
AND HOW MUCH BETTER THAN IDLING IN A PUBLIC-HOUSE, OR FLIRTING WITH
MAID SERVANTS.]
[Illustration: _ATTEMPTED FRAUD ON THE RAILWAY._
_Boy (about fourteen)._ "HALF TO BRIGHTON."
_Clerk._ "ARE YOU ABOVE THIRTEEN?"
_Boy._ "NO. ONLY TWELVE LAST----"
_Clerk (interrupting)._ "THEN YOU ARE WHOLE PRICE!"
(_Sold._)]
[Illustration: _THE PLEASURES OF THE SEA._]
[Illustration: _THE RIVAL BARRELS._
THREE CHEERS FOR BASS AND HIS BARREL OF BEER, AND OUT WITH THE FOREIGN
RUFFIAN AND HIS BARREL-ORGAN!]
[Illustration: _HOW NOT TO DO IT._--No. I.
THESE ARE THE LITTLE CHILDREN WHO CONVERT THE PARK RAILINGS INTO
GYMNASTIC POLES. TO THE CONSTERNATION OF VOKINS'S HORSE!----]
[Illustration: No. II.
AND THIS IS ONE OF THE HYDE PARK KEEPERS HAVING HIS CARTE DE VISITE
TAKEN.
(MORAL. _Would it not be better if the Park Keeper attended to his
duties a little?_)]
[Illustration: _THE BITER BIT._
_First Cabby._ "I'M WAITIN' FOR THE MEEGER, YOUR HONOR!"
_Second Ditto (in an audible whisper)._ "B'LIEVE ME, 'TIS THE GINERAL,
AND I'M HIS KYAR."
_Green (?) Ensign._ "AW--BORE THAT--CAN'T TAKE ME, I SUPPOSE? I'M ONLY
A CAPTAIN."
(_Hibernians decidedly sold._)]
[Illustration: _THE GREAT EXHIBITION._
_Sarah Jane._ "LAWKS! WHY, IT'S HEXACT LIKE OUR HEMMER!"]
[Illustration: _A DAY AT BIARRITZ._]
[Illustration: _IN SEARCH OF EXCITEMENT._
TRYING THE TOP OF THE MONUMENT ON A WET AFTERNOON.]
[Illustration: _THE BLACK DIAMOND--THE REAL MOUNTAIN OF LIGHT!!_]
[Illustration: _THE SPORTIVE ELEMENTS._
FOR DOWNRIGHT HEALTHY EXCITEMENT, WE RECOMMEND A DAY'S HUNTING IN A
GALE OF WIND.]
[Illustration: _DOING A LITTLE BUSINESS._
_Old Equestrian._ "WELL BUT--YOU'RE NOT THE BOY I LEFT MY HORSE WITH!"
_Boy._ "NO, SIR, I JIST SPEKILATED, AND BOUGHT 'IM OF T'OTHER BOY FOR
A HARPENNY?"]
[Illustration: _THE NEW RIDE. FRIGHTFUL SCENE IN KENSINGTON GARDENS!_
SHALL OUR PRIVACY BE INVADED? SHALL OUR CHILDREN BE RIDDEN DOWN BY A
BLOODTHIRSTY AND A BLOATED ARISTOCRACY? ARE OUR WIVES, DAUGHTERS, AND
DOMESTICS TO BE TORN TO PIECES BY FEROCIOUS MASTIFFS? NEVER! UP THEN!
MARROWBONES TO THE RESCUE!]
[Illustration: _THE MORNING RIDE._
A NICE SENSATION FOR BRIGHTON.--POP OVER THE RAILS AND HAVE A GALLOP
ON THE RACECOURSE.]
[Illustration: _IN GOOD SOCIETY._
ARRIVAL OF THOSE DISTINGUISHED "LIONS," THE HIPPOPOTAMUS, AND THE
GREAT TORTOISE.]
[Illustration: _WHAT WE WANT TO KNOW._
WE WANT TO KNOW WHY THE AUTHORITIES AT BRIGHTON, SO SENSIBLE
AND CONSIDERATE IN KEEPING THE PLACE FREE FROM THE DETESTABLE
ORGAN-GRINDERS, SHOULD PERMIT THE TERRIBLE NUISANCES INDICATED ABOVE?
FRESH PRAWNS, WHITING, OYSTERS, OR WATER-CRESS, ARE CAPITAL THINGS IN
THEIR WAY, AND WE SHOULD THINK THAT THE JADED MAN OF OCCUPATION, OR
THE INVALID, WOULD VERY MUCH RATHER SEND TO A RESPECTABLE SHOP FOR
SUCH DELICACIES, THAN HAVE THEM "BELLOWED" INTO HIS EARS MORNING,
NOON, AND NIGHT.]
[Illustration: _NOT A DOUBTFUL RACE._
THE RAILWAY ENGINE AND THE FOXHUNTER--WHAT IT MUST COME TO.]
[Illustration: _SHOEBURYNESS._
_Captain Limber, R.A._ "HAVING PLACED OUR BURSTER AND PREPARED OUR
PERCUSSION FUSE, WHICH, YOU REMEMBER, EXPLODES BY THE SIMPLE FALL OF
THE NEEDLE--WE PROCEED TO * * * *."
(PROFESSOR DABBLES _quite sees that the Artillery is a Service of
itself, and having an appointment at the Megatherium, hurries off by
the train._)]
[Illustration: _SHOCKING INCIDENT IN REAL LIFE._
_Enter Bachelor Brother (who has come from a long day of business)._
"THAT CONFOUNDED ORGAN, AGAIN! ALTHOUGH I TOLD HIM TO GO!
BUT--PHEW!!--MY DEAR REBECCA, WHAT DREADFUL ODOUR IS THIS IN THE ROOM?"
(_The truth is, Rebecca has had the Grinding Ruffian to sketch from._)]
[Illustration: _A DAY WITH THE STAG._--No. I.
TOM NODDY DOESN'T TAKE HIS OWN HORSE WITH HIM, AS HE THINKS IT IS
BETTER TO HIRE A HORSE ACCUSTOMED TO THE COUNTRY. THE GROOM ASSURES
HIM THAT HE COULDN'T BE BETTER MOUNTED, FOR THE HORSE IS VERY FAST,
WITH TRE_MEN_DJUS JUMPING POWER.
No. II.
* * * IT IS A BEAUTIFUL FIND, AND T. N. GETS WELL AWAY WITH THE
HOUNDS. THE FIRST FIELD IS A LARGE PASTURE, AND HE AND HIS HORSE AGREE
WONDERFULLY. OUR LITTLE FRIEND THINKS THERE IS NOTHING LIKE A GRASS
COUNTRY--UNTIL HE COMES.
No. III.
TO THIS PRETTY THING--OVER WHICH HE AND THE HORSE (WITH
TRE_MEN_DJUS JUMPING POWER) GO, AND ENTER THE NEXT FIELD IN.
No. IV.
THE FOLLOWING ORDER:--T. N. 1
HIS HORSE 2]
[Illustration: _A PLEASANT PROSPECT._
_Little T. N._ "SHALL YOU TAKE A SINGLE, OR RETURN?"
_Friend._ "WELL, I SHALL TAKE A RETURN, BECAUSE I KNOW THE HORSE
I'M GOING TO RIDE,--BUT YOU'D BETTER TAKE A SINGLE AND AN INSURANCE
TICKET!"]
[Illustration: _OUTRAGE UPON A GALLANT TURK._]
[Illustration: _THE GREAT BONNET QUESTION._]
[Illustration: _SUCCESSFUL ANGLING._]
[Illustration: _THE LADIES' LAP-DOG SHOW._]
[Illustration: _A COCKNEY AT DIEPPE._]
[Illustration: _THE ORGAN-GRINDING NUISANCE._--No. I.
_Old Lady (l)._ "BOTHER OVER THE WAY! WE LIKE THE HORGINS!]"
[Illustration: No. II.
OVER THE WAY--THE INVALID.]
[Illustration: _OUT OF HIS ELEMENT._
THAT AWFUL SWELL PERCY DE GOSLING FINDS HIMSELF BY ACCIDENT AT
BRIGHTON ON WHIT-MONDAY. HIS NERVES HAVE BEEN TERRIBLY SHOCKED.
ALREADY HE HAS BEEN ASKED IF HE WANTED ANY TEA-ACCOMMODATION; AND NOW
A BOATMAN REQUESTS HIM TO "JINE THIS PARTY, AND MAKE UP THE 'ARF DOZEN
FOR A ROW."]
[Illustration: _LE SPORT._
HOORAY! MOSSOO GOES TO THE DERBY, AND IN HIS FAVOURITE COSTUME OF
"BRITISH SPORTMAN!"]
[Illustration: _AN OLD FRIEND._
OH DEAR NO! OLD BR--GGS IS _NOT_ DEAD--HE HAS TAKEN TO YACHTING FOR
THE BENEFIT OF HIS HEALTH.]
[Illustration: _A JUNIOR COUNSEL._]
[Illustration: _A FAMILY BOX AT THE THEATRE._]
MR. BRIGGS'S HORSE-TAMING EXPERIENCES.
[Illustration: No. I.
OUR FRIEND B. GOES WITH A PARTY TO SEE THE MECHANICAL HORSE. HE OF
COURSE TRIES ITS POWERS. FIRST, THE SLOW AND GENTLE MOVEMENT!----]
[Illustration: _DE GUSTIBUS, &c., &c._
FANCY PORTRAIT OF THE NOBLE LORD WHO FINDS ORGAN-GRINDING AN
"AGREEABLE RELIEF."]
MR. BRIGGS'S HORSE-TAMING EXPERIENCES.
[Illustration: No. II.
AND THEN THE QUICK AND STRONG!]
[Illustration: _THE FINANCIAL QUESTION._
HORROR OF JOHN THOMAS ON FINDING THAT UPPER SERVANTS ARE TO PAY THE
INCOME TAX.]
[Illustration: _THE DINNER-BELL._]
MR. BRIGGS'S HORSE-TAMING EXPERIENCES.
[Illustration: No. III.
OUR DEAR OLD FRIEND BR--GGS, WHO HAS BECOME VERY PARTICULAR ABOUT
THE HORSE HE RIDES, PURCHASES ONE OF THOSE EXTRAORDINARY COBS, UP TO
WEIGHT, WARRANTED NEVER TO TRIP NOR SHY, AND WHICH ARE SO INVALUABLE
TO AN ELDERLY OR A TIMID RIDER! THE ANIMAL HAS, HOWEVER, AMONGST A FEW
OTHER PLAYFUL PECULIARITIES, A HABIT OF TRYING TO JAM HIS RIDER'S LEG
AGAINST THE WALL, TO SAY NOTHING OF WALKING ABOUT ON HIS HIND LEGS, AS
IF HE WERE A BIPED!
(_Tableau. Mr. B. as he appeared on the pavement._)]
[Illustration: _A ONE-SIDED VIEW._
_Sailor (confidentially)._ "I SAY, JACK, ISN'T IT QUITE MELANCHOLY TO
SEE THEM POOR FELLOWS DRESSED UP LIKE THAT 'ERE?"]
MR. BRIGGS'S HORSE-TAMING EXPERIENCES.
[Illustration: No. IV.
TO SHOW WHAT PERFECT CONTROL HE HAS OVER HIS ANIMAL, HE SEATS HIMSELF
ON ITS BACK WITH HIS FACE TO ITS TAIL, AND--SUDDENLY OPENS AN
UMBRELLA.]
[Illustration: _A BRILLIANT SUGGESTION, PRESENTED GRATIS TO THE HORSE
GUARDS BY MR. PUNCH._]
[Illustration: _THE MALVERN HILLS._]
[Illustration: _JOHN BULL À LA FRANÇAISE._]
[Illustration: _HURRAH!_
THE VOLUNTEER MOVEMENT--CHAIRING THE BEST SHOT IN ENGLAND.]
[Illustration: FAREWELL.]
LONDON
BRADBURY, AGNEW, & CO., PRINTERS, WHITEFRIARS.
INDEX.
YEAR PAGE
ABUSE of the Aspirate, The 1863 21
Accepting a Situation 1856 40
Across Country 1864 181
Advice Gratis 1863 187
After Dundreary 1862 201
After Supper--Strange Admission 1861 198
All the Difference 1863 199
Ambition 1863 39
An Afflicted One 1853 214
An Idea for a Wet Day 1863 215
An Interesting Question 1859 204
An Old Friend 1853 257
Ancient Britons, The 1861 1
Another Pretty Little Americanism 1864 167
Anxious Inquirers 1863 143
Anxious to Preserve our Figure, we take a Turkish Bath 1861 212
Aquatics--When the Bees are Swarming 1858 59
Aristocratic Hotel Company, The 1863 41-4
Art Treasures 1860 119
At a Rifle Competee-tion in the North 1863 202
At Dieppe 1862 118
Attempted Fraud on the Railway 1863 241
Awful Apparition 1861 171
Awful Tale of an Eel 1858 208
Awkward for Papa 1863 22
BADLY Hit During the Recent Engagement with the Guards 1863 236
Ball, The 1862 191
Battue, The 1862 125
Beach, The--A Sketch for Warm Weather 1862 161-4
Bear Baiting 1862 211
Benevolence 1860 61
Beware of Artillery Whiskers 1861 11
Billiards 1864 169
Bit of Household Stuff, A 1862 238
Biter Bit, The 1864 243
Black Diamond, The--The Real Mountain of Light 1851 246
Bores of the Beach, The 1860 101
Bouncer, A 1860 94
Board and Lodging 1864 64
Bois de Boulogne--For Cavaliers only 1863 118
Box of Books from London, The 1856 233
Breaking the Bye-Laws 1852 220
Brighton Jewels 1860 237
Brilliant Suggestion, A, Presented gratis to the Horse
Guards by Mr. Punch 1858 261
Broken Country, A 1864 234
Brook Jump, The 1863 145
By the Fast Train, 1861 115
By your Leave, 1859 49
CABMAN GUIDE, The, 1861 52
Canine, 1863 48
Capillary Attractions, 1858 35
Capital Finish, A, 1860 156
Carte de Visite, The, 1862 157
Cause and Effect, 1864 57
Caution to the Unwary, A, 1859 14
Chaff, 1862 103
Chamber Practice, 1860 129
Chance for Jeames, A, 1860 53
Channel Passage, The, 1862 206
Chip of the Old Block, A, 1862 190
Christening of Jones's First, The, 1863 142
Clerical Beard Movement, The, 1861 49
Cockney at Dieppe, A, 1851 254
Coincidence, A, 1860 32
Collar Mania, The, 1854 64
Comfortable Quarters, 1859 152
Comforter, A, 1862 19
Complimentary, 1864 225
Complimentary to Paterfamilias, 1860 16
Confirmed Bachelor, 1861 159
Connoisseur, A, 1859 135
Considerate Attention, 1860 26
Consolation, 1859 94
Consolation, 1861 130
Consoling from Consols, 1862 96
Consummation devoutly to be wished, A, 1862 21
Contemplative Man's Recreation, The, 1860 137
Contented Mind, A, 1860 138
Cook's Morning Service, The, 1863 220
Costermonger as he is, and as he might be, The, 1863 167
Country Races--Amateur Professionals, 1855 215
Courtesies of Travel, The, 1859 123
Cricket--The Pride of the Village, 1863 58
Crinoline for Domestic use, 1862 132
Crinoline for Domestic use, 1862 235
Croquet, 1863 106
Crossing-Sweeper Nuisance, The, 1856 8
Cruel, 1861 4
Cruel Joke at a Fête, 1859 193
Cub-Hunting, 1862 203
Curious Echo at a Railway Station, 1861 127
Curious effect of Relaxing Air, 1849 104
DABBLING, 1861 24
Darlings, The, come out to see the 38th Othersex
Volunteers Drilled, 1861 2
Day at Biarritz, A 1863 244-5
Day with the Stag, A 1856 252
Day's Amusement, A 1864 208
Day's Pleasure, A 1860 25
Deal, A 1863 152
Debate on the New Ministry 1858 88
Decidedly 1860 166
De Gustibus, &c. 1858 258
Delicate Hint, A 1863 13
Delicious 1862 136
Difference in Opinion, A 1863 12
Difficult Task, A 1850 127
Dignity and Impudence 1861 60
Dignity and Impudence 1858 150
Dignity of Age, The 1856 15
Diner à la Russe 1862 126
Dining under Difficulties 1861 3
Dinner-Bell, The 1849 259
Dip in French Waters, A 1862 68
Dissenters in the University 1855 127
District Telegraph, The 1863 23
Disturbed Imagination, A 1859 230
Diving Belles 1862 118
Dog-days, The 1864 218
Doing a little Business 1864 247
Doosed aggravating for Cornet Flinders 1863 55
Doubtful Compliment, A 1862 126
Dramatic 1863 231
Drawing Room, A 1858 127