Saturday, January 22nd, 1876.
Still another proof of the falsity of the cards. Yesterday I had a
sort of sorceress come and she pretended to give me good luck. She
told me to call the person I wanted. I called A---- and that woman
told me he could not live without me; that he was dying of grief
and jealousy, and he was especially jealous because a wicked woman
had told him that I loved another man.
May all the witches die! May all the cards burn! They are nothing
but lies!
Sunday, January 23d, 1876.
I am making a large white garment for the house, for the spring, in
Nice. Nice, miserable city, why cannot I live there as I like? In
Nice I know everybody, but to live in Nice except as a queen isn't
worth while.
I am sad, I am in a foreign country, I long to return home, just for
a single day, for if I stayed longer, I should want to go back.
In the evening we went to the Apollo theatre, they gave the _Vestal_
and a ballet. I wore white with a Greek coiffure. There were a
great many people, and an especially large number of men. Not a
single woman between our box and the stage.
_From Monday, January 24th, to February 10th, 1876:
Rome, Hôtel de Londres, Piazza di Spagna._
I swear that all these tragic and jealous remarks about A---- were
written under the influence of romantic reading, and that I only
half believed them while I was writing, exciting myself for the
pleasure of it, and I greatly regret these exaggerations.
The archimandrite has been at our house. He is a charming man who,
after having been a soldier, turned monk from despair at having lost
his wife. He told us that there was a Madame S---- who greatly
desired to make Mamma's acquaintance.
Returning from the photographer's, such dismal thoughts filled my
brain that I did not dress and let Mamma and Dina go out without me.
Being left alone, I am very sad, I am singing "Mignon."
Tuesday, January 25th, 1876.
I am homesick. I took a singing lesson, and then went out with
Mamma. We went to M. de E----'s studio. He requested permission to
present a very elegant and popular M. Benard, received everywhere in
society. He told us a great many things about Rome.
From there we went to Monseigneur de F----'s, who yesterday asked if
we had had our audience.
This priest is turning out better and better, he has even made
scandals. He told us that I had been noticed at the opera, my white
dress had attracted attention, and said that to go to court we need
only write to the Minister or Ambassador.
"I should like," he added, "to be able to open to you the other
door, as I have opened the Holy One."
"O Monseigneur," I replied, "the Holy Door is far preferable."
From there to the residence of Madame S---- (the archimandrite had
told her, and she was expecting us), who is the most charming and
the ugliest woman in the world. She received us in the most
delightful way, and immediately spoke of the Quirinal.