only for the youth, but for the age of their offspring; who teach them
usefulness, and not to expect too much from the world; to become early
familiarized with the stern and actual realities of life, and never to
be apes of fashion nor parasites of greatness. Parents, then, should
educate their children not merely in scholastic acquirements, but in a
knowledge of the respective positions they are to occupy when they
become men and women. Educate them to the duties that the world will
require of them when they arrive at that long looked for period when
they will have reached maturity, and enter into the game that every
person must play during his existence in the world. Educate the girl to
the intricate duties that will be required of her as a wife and mother,
and to the position she is to occupy in society, and that it rests with
herself whether it shall be exalted or whether it shall be debased and
lowly. Educate the boy to a knowledge of what the busy world will
require of him; teach him self-reliance and all manly attributes.
A knowledge of the world is more than necessary to enable us to live in
it wisely, and this knowledge should commence in the nursery. It must be
remembered that the largest and most important part of the education of
children, whether for good or evil, is carried on at home, often
unconsciously in their amusements, and under the daily influence of what
they see and hear about them. It is there that subtle brains and lissome
fingers find scope and learn to promote the well-being of the community.
One can not tell what duties their children may be called to perform in
after life. They must teach them to cultivate their faculties, and to
exercise all their senses to choose the good and refuse the evil.
Above all things, teach children what life is. It is not simply
breathing and moving. Life is a battle, and all thoughtful people see it
so,—a battle between good and evil from childhood. Good influence
drawing us up toward the divine, bad influence drawing us down to the
brute. Teach children that they lead two lives, the life without and the
life within; that the inside must be pure in the sight of God, as well
as the outside in the sight of man. Educate them, then, to love the good
and true, and remember that every word spoken within the hearing of
little children tends toward the formation of character. Teach little
children to love the beautiful. If you are able, give them a corner in
the garden for flowers, allow them to have their favorite trees. Teach
them to wander in the prettiest woodlets, show them where they best can
view the sunset. Buy them pictures, and encourage them to deck their
rooms in their childish way. Thus may the mother weave into the life of
her children thoughts and feelings, rich, beautiful, grand, and noble,
which will make all after life brighter and better.
The duties of children to parents are far too little considered. As the
children grow up the parents lean on them much earlier than either
imagine. In the passage of years the children gain experience and
strength. But with the parents! The cares of a long life bow the form,
and the strong are again made weak. It is now that the duties of
children assume their grandest forms. It is not sufficient to simply
give them a home to make their declining years comfortable. While
supplying their physical wants, their hearts may be famishing for some
expression of love from you. If you think they have outgrown these
desires, you are mistaken. Every little attention you can show your
mother—your escort to Church or concert, or for a quiet walk—brings
back the youth of her heart; her cheeks glow with pleasure, and she
feels happy for such a dutiful son. The father, occupied and absorbed as
he may be, is not wholly indifferent to the filial expressions of
devoted love. He may pretend to care but very little for them; but,
having faith in their sincerity, it would give him pain were they
entirely withheld. Fathers need their sons quite as much as the sons
need the fathers; but in how many deplorable instances do they fail to
find in them a staff for their declining years!
You may disappoint the ambition of your parents, you may be unable to
distinguish yourself as you fondly hoped; but let this not swerve you
from a determination to be a son of whose moral character they need
never be ashamed. Begin early to cultivate a habit of thoughtfulness and
consideration for others, especially for those you are commanded to
honor. Can you begrudge a few extra steps for the mother who never
stopped to number those you demanded during your helpless infancy? Have
you the heart to slight her requests or treat her remarks with
indifference, when you can not begin to measure the patient devotion
with which she bore your peculiarities? Anticipate her wants, invite her
confidence, be prompt to offer assistance, express your affections as
heartily as you did when a child, that the mother may never have
occasion to grieve in secret for the child she has lost.
[Illustration]
[Illustration: AIM OF LIFE.]
[Illustration]
It is the aim that makes the man, and without this he is nothing as far
as the utter destitution of force, weight, and even individuality among
men can reduce him to nonentity. The strong gusts and currents of the
world sweep him this way and that, without steam or sail to impel, or
helm to guide him. If he be not speedily wrecked or run aground, it is
more his good fortune than good management. We have never heard a more
touching confession of utter weakness and misery than these words from
one singularly blessed with the endowments of nature and of Providence:
"My life is aimless."
Take heed, young man, of an aimless life. Take heed, too, of a low and
sordid aim. A well-ascertained and generous purpose gives vigor,
direction, and perseverance to all man's efforts. Its concomitants are a
well-disciplined intellect, character, influence, tranquillity, and
cheerfulness within—success and honor without. Whatever a man's talents
and advantages may be, with no aim, or a low one, he is weak and
despicable; and he can not be otherwise than respectable and influential
with a high one. Without some definite object before us, some standard
which we are earnestly striving to reach, we can not expect to attain to
any great height, either mentally or morally. Placing for ourselves high
standards, and wishing to reach them without any further effort on our
part, is not enough to elevate us in any very great degree.
Some one has said, "Nature holds for each of us all that we need to make
us useful and happy; but she requires us to labor for all that we get."
God gives nothing of value unto man unmatched by need of labor; and we
can expect to overcome difficulties only by strong and determined
efforts. Here is a great and noble work lying just before us, just as
the blue ocean lies out beyond the rocks which line the shore. In our
strivings for "something better than we have known" we should work for
others' good rather than our own pleasure. Those whose object in life is
their own happiness find at last that their lives are sad failures.
We need to do something each day that shall help us to a larger life of
soul; and every word or deed which brings joy or gladness to other
hearts lifts us nearer a perfect life; for a noble deed is a step toward
God. To live for something worthy of life involves the necessity of an
intelligent and definite plan of action. More than splendid dreamings or
magnificent resolves is necessary to success in the objects and
ambitions of life. Men come to the best results in every department of
effort only as they thoughtfully plan and earnestly toil in given
directions. Purposes without work is dead. It were vain to hope for good
results from mere plans. Random or spasmodic efforts, like aimless
shoots, are generally no better than wasted time or strength. The
purposes of shrewd men in the business of this life are always followed
by careful plans, enforced by work. Whether the object is learning,
honor, or wealth, the ways and means are always laid out according to
the best rules and methods. The mariner has his chart, the architect his
plans, the sculptor his model, and all as a means and condition of
success. Inventive genius, or even what is called inspiration, can do
little in any department of the theoretic or practical science except as
it works by a well-formed plan; then every step is an advance towards
the accomplishment of its object. Every tack of the ship made in
accordance with nautical law keeps her steadily nearing the port. Each
stroke of the chisel brings the marble into a clearer likeness to the
model. No effort or time is lost; for nothing is done rashly or at
random.
Thus, in the grand aim of life, if some worthy purpose be kept
constantly in view, and for its accomplishment every effort be made
every day of your life, you will, unconsciously, perhaps, approach the
goal of your ambition. There can be no question among the philosophic
observers of men and events that fixedness of purpose is a grand element
of human success. When a man has formed in his mind a great sovereign
purpose, it governs his conduct as the laws of nature govern the
operation of physical things.
Every one should have a mark in view, and pursue it steadily. He should
not be turned from his course by other objects ever so attractive. Life
is not long enough for any one man to accomplish every thing. Indeed,
but few can at best accomplish more than one thing well. Many—alas!
very many—accomplish nothing. Yet there is not a man, endowed with
ordinary intellect or accomplishments, but can accomplish at least one
useful, important, worthy purpose. It was not without reason that some
of the greatest of men were trained from their youth to choose some
definite object in life, to which they were required to direct their
thoughts and to devote all their energies. It became, therefore, a sole
and ruling purpose of their hearts, and was almost certainly the means
of their future advancement and happiness in the world.
Of the thousands of men who are annually coming upon the stage of life
there are few who escape the necessity of adopting some profession or
calling; and there are fewer still who, if they knew the miseries of
idleness—tenfold keener and more numerous than those of the most
laborious profession—would ever desire such an escape. First of all, a
choice of business or occupation should be made, and made early, with a
wise reference to capacity and taste. The youth should be educated for
it and, as far as possible, in it; and when this is done it should be
pursued with industry, energy, and enthusiasm, which will warrant
success.
This choice of an occupation depends partly upon the individual
preference and partly upon circumstances. It may be that you are
debarred from entering upon that business for which you are best
adapted. In that case make the best choice in your power, apply yourself
faithfully and earnestly to whatever you undertake, and you can not well
help achieving a success. Patient application sometimes leads to great
results. No man should be discouraged because he does not get on rapidly
in his calling from the start. In the more intellectual professions
especially it should be remembered that a solid character is not the
growth of a day, that the mental faculties are not matured except by
long and laborious culture.
To refine the taste, to fortify the reasoning faculty with its
appropriate discipline, to store the cells of memory with varied and
useful learning, to train all the powers of the mind systematically, is
the work of calm and studious years. A young man's education has been of
but little use to him if it has not taught him to check the fretful
impatience, the eager haste to drink the cup of life, the desire to
exhaust the intoxicating draught of ambition. He should set his aim so
high that it will require patient years of toil to reach it. If he can
reach it at a bound it is unworthy of him. It should be of such a nature
that he feels the necessity of husbanding his resources.
You will receive all sorts of the most excellent advice, but you must do
your own deciding. You have to take care of yourself in this world, and
you may as well take your own way of doing it. But if a change of
business is desired be sure the fault is with the business and not the
individual. For running hither and thither generally makes sorry work,
and brings to poverty ere the sands of life are half run. The North,
South, East, and West furnish vast fields for enterprise; but of what
avail for the seeker to visit the four corners of the world if he still
is dissatisfied, and returns home with empty pockets and idle hands,
thinking that the world is wrong and that he himself is a misused and
shamefully imposed-on creature? The world, smiling at the rebuff, moves
on, while he lags behind, groaning over misusage, without sufficient
energy to roll up his sleeves and fight his way through.
A second profession seldom succeeds, not because a man may not make
himself fully equal to its duties, but because the world will not
readily believe he is so. The world argues thus: he that has failed in
his first profession, to which he dedicated the morning of his life and
the Spring-time of his exertion, is not the most likely person to master
a second. To this it might be replied that a man's first profession is
often chosen for him by others; his second he usually decides upon for
himself; therefore, his failure in his first profession may, for what he
knows, be mainly owing to the sincere but mistaken attention he was
constantly paying to his second.
Ever remember that it is not your trade or profession that makes you
respectable. Manhood and profession or handicraft are entirely different
things. An occupation is never an end of life. It is an instrument put
into our hands by which to gain for the body the means of living until
sickness or old age robs it of life, and we pass on to the world for
which this is a preparation. The great purpose of living is twofold in
character. The one should never change from the time reason takes the
helm; it is to live a life of manliness, of purity and honor. To live
such a life that, whether rich or poor, your neighbors will honor and
respect you as a man of sterling principles. The other is to have some
business, in the due performance of which you are to put forth all your
exertions. It matters not so much what it is as whether it be honorable,
and it may change to suit the varying change of circumstances. When
these two objects—character and a high aim—are fairly before a youth,
what then? He must strive to attain those objects. He must work as well
as dream, labor as well as pray. His hand must be as stout as his heart,
his arm as strong as his head. Purpose must be followed by action. Then
is he living and acting worthily, as becomes a human being with great
destinies in store for him.
[Illustration]
[Illustration: SUCCESS OR FAILURE.]
[Illustration]
Mankind every-where are desirous of achieving a success, of making the
most of life. At times, it is true, they act as if they little cared
what was the outcome of their exertions. But even in the lives of the
most abandoned and reckless there are moments when their good angel
points out to them the heights to which they might ascend, that a wish
arises for
"Something better than they have known."
But, alas! they have not the will to make the necessary exertions.
We are confronted with two ends—success or failure. To win the former
it requires of us labor and perseverance. We must remember that those
who start for glory must imitate the mettled hounds of Acton, and must
pursue the game not only where there is a path, but where there is none.
They must be able to simulate and to dissimulate; to leap and to creep;
to conquer the earth like Cæsar; to fall down and kiss it like Brutus;
to throw their sword, like Brennus, into the trembling scale; or, like
Nelson, to snatch the laurels from the doubtful hand of victory while
she is hesitating where to bestow them. He that would win success in
life must make Perseverance his bosom friend, Experience his wise
counselor, Caution his elder brother, and Hope his guardian genius. He
must not repine because the fates are sometimes against him, but when he
trips or falls let him, like Cæsar when he stumbled on shore, stumble
forward, and, by escaping the omen, change its nature and meaning.
Remembering that those very circumstances which are apt to be abused as
the palliatives of failure are the true tests of merit, let him gird up
his loins for whatever in the mysterious economy of the future may await
him. Thus will he rise superior to ill-fortune, and becoming daily more
and more impassive to its attacks, will learn to force his way in spite
of it, till, at last, he will be able to fashion his luck to his will.
"Life is too short," says a shrewd thinker, "for us to waste one moment
in deploring our lot. We must go after success, since it will not come
to us, and we have no time to spare." If you wish to succeed, you must
do as you would to get in through a crowd to a gate all are anxious to
reach—hold your ground and push hard; to stand still is to give up the
battle. Give your energies to the highest employment of which your
nature is capable. Be alive, be patient, work hard, watch opportunities,
be rigidly honest, hope for the best; and if you are not able to reach
the goal of your ambition, which is possible in spite of your utmost
efforts, you will die with the consciousness of having done your best,
which is after all the truest success to which man can aspire.
As manhood dawns and the young man catches its first lights, the
pinnacles of realized dreams, the golden domes of high possibilities,
and the purpling hills of great delights, and then looks down upon the
narrow, sinuous, long, and dusty paths by which others have reached
them, he is apt to be disgusted with the passage, and to seek for
success through broader channels and by quicker means. To begin at the
foot of the hills and work slowly to the top seems a very discouraging
process, and here it is that thousands of young men have made shipwreck
of their lives. There is no royal road to success. The path lies through
troubles and discouragements. It lies through fields of earnest, patient
labor. It calls on the young man to put forth energy and determination.
It bids him build well his foundation, but it promises in reward of this
a crowning triumph.
There never was a time in the world's history when high success in any
profession or calling demanded harder or more earnest labor than now. It
is impossible to succeed in a hurry. Men can no longer go at a single
leap into eminent positions. As those articles are most highly prized to
attain which requires the greatest amount of labor, so the road that
leads to success is long and rugged. What matter if a round does break
or a foot slip; such things must be expected, and being expected, they
must be overcome. Rome was not built in a day; but proofs of her
magnificent temples are still to be seen. We each prepare a temple to
last through all eternity. A structure to last so long, can it take but
a day to build it? The days of a life-time are necessary to build the
monument mightier than Rome and more enduring than adamant. It is hard,
earnest work, step by step, that secures success; and while energy and
perseverance are securing the prize for steady workers, others, sitting
down by the wayside, are wondering why they, too, can not be successful.
They surely forget that the true key is labor, and that nothing but a
strong, resolute will can turn it.
The secret of one's success or failure is usually contained in answer to
the question, "How earnest is he?" Success is the child of confidence
and perseverance. The talent of success is simply doing what you can do
well, and doing well whatever you do, without a thought of fame. Success
is the best test of capacity, and materially confirms us in a favorable
opinion of ourselves. Success in life is the proper and harmonious
development of those faculties which God has given us. Whatever you try
to do in life, try with all your heart to do it well; whatever you
devote yourself to, devote yourself to it completely. Never believe it
possible that any natural ability can claim immunity from companionship
of the steady, plain, hard-working qualities, and hope to gain its end.
There can be no such fulfillment on this earth. Some happy talent and
some fortunate opportunity may form the sides of the ladder on which
some men mount; but the rounds of the ladder must be made of material to
stand wear and tear, and there is no substitute for thorough-going,
ardent, sincere earnestness. Never put your hand on any thing into which
you can not throw your whole self; never affect depreciation of your own
work, whatever it is.
Although success is the guerdon for which all men toil, they have,
nevertheless, often to labor on perseveringly without any glimmer of
success in sight. They have to live, meanwhile, upon their courage.
Sowing their seed, it may be in the dark, in the hope that it will yet
take root and spring up in achieved result. The best of causes have had
to fight their way to triumph through a long succession of failures, and
many of the assailants have died in the breach before the fortune has
been won. The heroism they have displayed is to be measured, not so much
by their immediate successes, as by the opposition they have encountered
and the courage with which they have maintained the struggle.
Among the habits required for the efficient prosecution of business of
any kind, and consequent success, the most important are those of
application, observation, method, accuracy, punctuality, and dispatch.
Some persons sneer at these virtues as little things, trifles unworthy
of their notice. It must be remembered that human life is made up of
trifles. As the pence make the pound and the minutes the hour, so it is
the repetition of little things, severally insignificant, that make up
human character. In the majority of cases where men have failed of
success, it has been owing to the neglect of little things deemed too
microscopic to need attention. It is the result of practical, every-day
experience, that steady attention to matter of detail is the mother of
good fortune. Accuracy is also of much importance, and an invariable
mark of good training in a man—accuracy in observation, accuracy in
speech, accuracy in the transaction of affairs. What is done in business
must be done well if you would win the success desired.
Give a man power, and a field in which to use it, and he must accomplish
something. He may not do and become all that he desires and dreams of,
but his life can not well be a failure. God has given to all of us
ability and opportunity enough to be moderately successful. If we
utterly fail, in the majority of cases, it is our own fault. We have
either neglected to improve the talents with which our Creator has
endowed us, or we fail to enter the door that has opened for us. Such is
the constitution of human society, that the wise person gradually learns
not to expect too much from life; while he strives for success by worthy
methods, he will be prepared for failure. He will keep his mind open to
enjoyment, but submit patiently to suffering. Wailings and complainings
in life are never of any use; only cheerful and continuous working in
right paths are of real avail. In spite of our best efforts failures are
in store for many of us. It remains, then, for you to do the best you
can under all circumstances, remembering that the race is not always to
the swift nor the battle to the strong. It is by the right application
of swiftness and strength that you are to make your way. It is not
sufficient to do the right thing, it must be done in the right way, at
the right time, if you would achieve success.