|THERE is a firm on Coyote creek, in New Jersey, that would like to
advertise in _The Boomerang_, and the members of the firm are evidently
good square men, although they are not large. They lack about four feet
in stature of being large enough to come within the range of our vision.
They have got more pure gall to the superficial foot than anybody we
ever heard of. It seems that the house has a lot of vermifuge to feed
plants, and a bedbug tonic that it wants to bring before the public, and
it wants us to devote a quarter of a column every day to the merits of
these bug and worm discouragers, and then take our pay out of tickets in
the drawing of a brindle dog next spring.
We might as well come right out end state that we are not publishing
this paper for our health, nor because we like to loll around in
luxury all day in the voluptuous office of the staff. We have mercenary
motives, and we can't work off wheezy parlor organs and patent corn
plasters and threshing machines very well. We desire the scads. We can
use them in our business, and we are gathering them in just as fast as
we can. At the present time we are pretty well supplied with rectangular
churns and stem-winding mouse traps. We do not need them, It takes too
much time to hypothecate them.
In closing, we will add, that New Jersey people will not be charged much
more for advertising space than Wyoming people. We have made special
rates so that we can give the patrons of the East almost as good terms
as our home advertisers.