SCENE--_Tent in rear of a Battle-field. Political Officer in
attendance upon Army, waiting for Military assistance._
_Political Officer_ (_impatiently_). Now then, Orderly, have you not
been able to secure a General for me?
_Orderly_ (_saluting_). Beg pardon, Sir, but it's so difficult, since
they have passed that new Royal Warrant, to know which is which.
_Pol. Off._ (_more impatiently_). Nonsense!--any General Officer will
do. _Ord_. Very good, Sir.
[_Exit. Political Officer stamps his foot irritably, when
enter First General Officer, hurriedly._
_First Gen. Off._ Well, Sir, how can I assist you?
_Pol. Off._ (_cordially_). Glad to see you, General. Fact is,
supposing we arrange a treaty, do you think it would be wise to
surrender the fortress on the right side of the river, if we retain
the redoubt near the wood as a basis of operations? You see--
_First Gen. Off._ (_interrupting_). Very sorry, but don't know
anything about it.
_Pol. Off._ (_annoyed_). But aren't you a General?
_First Gen. Off._ Certainly. General-Surgeon. Ta, ta! [_Exit._
_Pol. Off._ Well of all the--(_Enter Second Gen. Off._) Well, Sir,
what is it? Who are you?
_Second Gen. Off._ I am a General Officer, and I was told you required
my poor services.
_Pol. Off._ So I do. The fact is, General, supposing we arrange a
treaty, do you think it wise for us to surrender the fortress--
_Second Gen. Off._ (_interrupting_). Alas! my dear friend, I fear I
can be of no help to you--it is entirely out of my line.
_Pol. Off._ (_annoyed_). But aren't you a General?
_Second Gen. Off._ Certainly. A General-Chaplain. Farewell, dear
friend. [_Exit._
_Pol. Off._ Well of all the--(_Enter Third General Officer._) Well,
Sir, who and what are you?
_Third Gen. Off._ (_briskly_). A General. Now then, look sharp! No
time to lose. Hear you require me. How can I help you?
_Pol. Off._ (_aside_). Ah, this is the sort of man I want! (_Aloud._)
Well then, General, we are arranging a treaty, and I want your advice
about retaining a fortress on the right of the river--
_Third Gen. Off._ (_interrupting_). Sorry. Can't help! Not my
province. Good bye! [_Exit._
_Pol. Off._ (_shouting after him_). But aren't you a General?
_Third Gen. Off._ (_voice heard in the distance_.) Yes.
General-Postman!
[_Scene closes in upon political official language unfit for
publication._
* * * * *
MUSICAL NOTES.--_Saturday Afternoon_.--Albert Hall jubilant. M.
PLANCON or PLANÇON--the production of the "c" depending on the state
of his voice--was encored and "obliged again." So did Madame ALBANI,
who was in superb voice. But her accompanist, M. CARRODUS, who had
given us one violin _obbligato_, did _not_ obbligato again, and so
Madame sang, admirably of course, the ever-welcome "_Home, Sweet
Home_." GIULIA RAVOGLI gave her great _Orphéo_ song, and DRURIOLANUS,
practising courtly attitudes, as one preparing to receive a German
Emperor, smole beamingly on the gratified audience. At The Garden,
_Mireille_, revived on Wednesday last, hasn't much life in her, but
Miss EAMES charming.
* * * * *
NOTICE.--Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS.,
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