Lifting its chalice of sun-kissed foam
Far up the heights where the wild winds roam,
Weaving a web of shadow and sheen
In lowland meadows of dewy green.
Murmuring over the mossy stones,
In cool green dells where the gold bee drones,
Sudden and swift the showery fall,
Startling the wood bird's madrigal.
Orbing itself in a crystal lake
Set round with thickets of tangled brake,
In waveless calm, an emerald stone,
In the lap of the dusky forest thrown.
Silver flakes of tremulous light
Showering down from the fields of night,
Where the great white stars like lilies glow--
Tossed on its tide as feathery snow.
Hastening onward through troubled ways,
Forgotten for aye its woodland days,
Sullen and silent its banks beside
The free brook wanders, a mighty tide.
Beyond where the forest's purple rim
Belts the horizon, hazy and dim,
Thundering down from the frowning steeps,
Into the arms of the sea it leaps.
* * * * *
Did it ever strike you, I wonder, this marvel of our individuality?
Alone we are born, alone we live, alone we die, alone we pay the penalty
or reap the reward of our evil or well doing. In the troubles that
assail us we stand singly, however many councillors may flock to the
door of our tent. Not one in all the world, the nearest, the dearest or
the best, can bear one pang of life's experience for us, love us as they
may. We often hear a mother say: "My child is so headstrong; she will
not take my advice; she will go her own way." Of course she will, and
she will not, simply because individual tact is the law of all
experience. It is not being headstrong, it is merely fulfilling destiny.
In the fight we wage we do not fight by platoons or squads, under a
common leader, a thousand at a charge. We enter the lists one by one and
fight single handed. We choose our own colors and there is little of
pageantry or show. When we fall we fall as travelers disappear who walk
across a coast that is honeycombed with quicksand. We vanish, not in
crowds like men who are jostled out of life by earthquakes or flooded
like rats by tidal waves, but we slowly succumb to the inevitable in
solitudes where only the stars watch us and the spaces of a dim,
unsounded sea catch the fret of our mortal moan.
I have always thought that I should love to have the world come to an
end, with a grand final bang, while I was yet living and sentient on the
surface. I would like to be flashed out of being in the conglomerate of
a mighty swarm, like the covey of birds a huntsman's rifle brings down
or the multitude a Pompeiian doom overtakes. Such dying would be like
riding out of an electric-lighted station, by the car full, rather than
sneaking a place on the back platform like a tramp. But after all, death
would not lose its awful individuality even then. Marshal the whole
world, and aim a single bullet at a hundred million souls, with power to
still each pulse beat in the same rifle flash of time, yet each man
would die alone.
There is one final lesson to be gained through the doleful contemplation
of the world's flood-tide of sorrow, and that is the lesson of how to
bear our troubles so as to react as little as possible upon those with
whom life throws us in daily contact. Because the goblin bee has stung
our own souls, shall we seek to share the pain of its stateless sting
with all we meet? No more than we should endeavor to carry contagion in
our garments or put poison in our neighbor's well. I knew a man once, a
gallant, light-hearted soldier, who honored the blue and brass of his
country's uniform by wearing it. An awful sorrow suddenly smote his
life, like an Indian sortie from an ambush. Wife and children were swept
from his arms by a swift disaster and he was left alone. His friends
said: "He is a wrecked man! He will never lift his head again!" How did
he fulfill this prophecy of woe? He entered the chamber of his darkened
home and denied himself to everyone. He neither ate nor slept. He fought
by himself a greater battle than call of bugle ever summoned to any
field. He mastered his own soul, and emerged from that chamber after a
certain number of days a conqueror over his own sorrow. His smile was as
ready, his heart as tender, his genial speech as welcome at home and
abroad as it had ever been, and only when the goblin bee of memory stung
him in the silence of the companionless night did he live over again the
experience of his sorrow. None knew when that sting came, or how it
tarried; he bore it silently like a soldier and a man. The trifling
world called him light of love and easily consoled, but I think he was a
grand, unselfish hero, a benefactor rather than a destroyer of mankind.
When we get so that we can hide our sorrow in a smile we attain that
attitude that brings us closest to the divine. The man or the woman who
goes up and down the ways of the world with a groan on his lips and a
weed on his arm is an infliction worse than an out of tune hand organ.
If the bee stings, hold still and bear the hurt by yourself as best you
may, but don't talk it over with everyone you meet, like an old woman
petitioning a recipe for a bad cough and flaunting her physical ailments
forever in your face. When you have bright things to talk about and
comforting things to say, talk; otherwise hold your peace. The reason, I
think, why animals are never wrinkled and drawn of feature and gray like
mankind is because they cannot talk. If they had the power of speech
they would go around as humans do and disseminate unpleasant topics, as
idle winds start thistle pollen. Silence is golden when you can find
nothing better to do than to clamor your own troubles; speech only is
blessed when, like a bird, it evolves a song or wings a feathered hope.
It seems hardly the thing to do, perhaps, to single out the unhappy
folks in a present world so full of jollity and talk with them awhile
to-day. This bright autumn weather is so crowded with sights and sounds
to dazzle and enchant that to obtrude the leaf of rue within the garland
or breathe a minor tone into the music seems almost out of place. And
yet, for some reason or other, as I sit here at my desk to-day, the
thought of the hearts that are heavy in the midst of all the world's
fair pageant, and the eyes that cannot see the banners by reason of
their tears, come to me with a strong and resistless force.
Alas, for the goblin bee that stings, yet all too often may not "state
its sting"! We walk with a crowd, and yet are conscious that our way is
not theirs. It lies apart, we know not why, and evermore dips into
shadow and threads the dark defiles of gloom. There are so many more
reasons for being sorry than for being glad, we think. Try to count the
causes for laughter, and then, over against them, set the reasons for
sorrow and see which way the balance falls. I take my seat on a bench
out at the big show and watch the crowd for an hour. Do I see many faces
that do not bear the scar of the "goblin bee"? From the little
four-year-old who is bitterly crying because somebody has jostled its
toy from its hand, to the woman whose eyes are sunken with sorrow
because death has jostled the one whom she loved into his grave,
everybody who passes, with but few exceptions, shows the scar of that
stateless sting.
* * * * *
Look at my window-garden, yonder! The sunshine, stealing in from the
south, has wooed a dozen pansies into bloom--"Johnny-jump-ups," they
used to call them when I was a girl. How bright and cheery and chatty
they look. We have those sort of faces (some of us) every day about our
breakfast tables. The little folks, God bless 'em! with their shining
hair, their bright eyes, and the soft velvet of their cheeks, are the
blessed heartsease of our home. And there is a fuchsia, turbaned like a
Turk, behind the pansies. Just such sumptuous, graceful women we see
every day. Like the fuchsia, they are beautiful and that is all. They
yield no fragrance. They attract the eye but fail to reach the heart.
Who wouldn't rather have mignonette growing in the window? There is a
yellow blossom in the window that reminds one of the patient shining of
certain homely souls I know, making sunshine in humble homes; cheerful
old maid aunts, sweet-hearted elder sisters, yielding the honey of their
hearts to others. A cluster of fading violets sets me thinking of frail
invalids and the host of "shut-in" ones, whose delicate and dying beauty
fills our eyes with unstayed tears and our hearts with the shadow of
coming sorrow.
* * * * *
There are gates that swing within your life and mine from day to day,
letting in rare opportunities that tarry but a moment and are gone, like
travelers bound for points remote. There is the opportunity to resist
the temptation to do a mean thing; improve it, for it is in a hurry,
like a man whose ticket is bought and whose time is up. It won't be back
this way, either, for opportunities for good are not like tourists who
travel on return tickets. There is the opportunity to say a pleasant
word to your wife, sir, or you, madam, to your husband, instead of
venting your temper and your "nerves" upon each other. Love's
opportunity travels by lightning express and has no time to dawdle
around the waiting-room. If you improve it at all it must be while the
gate swings to let it through.
* * * * *
My dear, let me implore you, whatever else you let go, hold on to your
enthusiasm. Grow old if you must; grow white-headed and bent and
care-furrowed, if such must needs be the process of years, but don't
grow to be a stick. If you must pass on from the green time of your
freshness, change into sweet hay and keep your fragrance. If the cage
must grow rusty and lose its brightness, there is a bird within, that it
were a pity to strangle to keep it from singing to the end. I don't care
how successful, or rich, or learned a man becomes, if he maintains a
grim repression of all romance and enthusiasm, and what some hard old
"Gradgrinds" call the "nonsense" within him, he is nothing more than a
fine cage with a dead bird in it. When I hear a person say of another,
"Oh, he is a substantial fellow; no nonsense about him!" I picture a
gold-fish in a glass globe. A glittering cuticle that covers anything so
bloodless as the anatomy of a fish is not worth much. There are a good
many types of men to be detected, but the bloodless, emotionless,
heart-paralytic, is the worst. Polish up a golden ball all you like. It
may ornament your mantel, or serve as a useless bit of glitter in some
corner, but when you begin to feel hungry and faint, and in need of
solace and cheer, you will turn from the golden ball and pick up the
veriest old rusty coat apple from an orchard's windfall, that has
mellowed under summer noon, and sweetened in summer rains and dews,
praising God for its flavor and its juices, even if you can buy forty
bushels of its counterpart, for the price of one of your polished golden
balls. Cultivate the "nonsense" in you, then, if it tends to enthusiasm
of the right sort. It is the sympathy we get from people, the
heartsomeness and cheer that keep our souls nourished, rather than the
mere dazzle of intellectual attainment, or the greatness of any worldly
achievement. Heart rather than head; nature rather than art; genuineness
rather than pretense; romance rather than absolute realism; enthusiasm
rather than petrifaction, will make a man rather than a gold fish, a
juicy apple rather than a ball of metallic and glittering nothingness.
* * * * *
We were gathered at the Norfolk Station awaiting the train that was to
carry us over the marshes to Virginia Beach and the sea. The crowd that
surrounded us was very different from a Chicago crowd. There was no
pushing, no bold assertiveness, no elbows. There were lots of pretty
women, and as for me everybody knows I simply adore the open sky, a tree
in blossom and a pretty woman. There were young girls with velvety brown
eyes within whose dusky shadows one might look fathom deep as into a
well of limpid water; girls with blue eyes like fringed gentians; women
with grand free curves of figure that would have made Hebe look
commonplace; women with shapely shoulders and long, aristocratic hands,
tinted at the finger-tips as though fresh from picking ripe
strawberries; girls all in white (for the day was warm), like June
lilies; women with snowy teeth and adorable smiles to disclose them;
little tots of girls with braided hair and soft, questioning eyes;
queenly girls, like tulips in bloom, all chatting together in subdued
but merry tones and laughing as delicately and airily as thrushes sing.
Oh, I lost my heart to you, my pretty southern maidens, and count the
time well spent I devoted to the contemplation of your many graces away
down in that little station by the torrid bay.
* * * * *
If I was a liar and wanted to reform I shouldn't quit lying all at once.
I would start out with a covenant to occasionally tell the truth. By and
by this spasmodic truth-telling, like the grain blown by the wind among
stones, would, perhaps, yield sufficient harvest to send me not quite
empty-handed up to St. Peter's gate. If I drank whisky I would commence
to reform by swearing off on one glass out of three, and perhaps the
manhood within me, having so much more chance to grow, would elbow its
way into heaven. If I was a gossip I would try to hold my tongue from
speaking evil half the time, and in that blissful interval perhaps my
dwarfed soul would get a start skyward. It is not by sudden achievement
that we consummate a long journey. It is step by step and mile by mile
over a stony road that brings us to the goal, and it is not by mere
resolving that we renounce the old and attain unto the new. He who
travels but a few steps and keeps his face heavenward is on the way,
and every small decision for the right, faithfully adhered to, is a
notable step toward a consummated journey.
* * * * *
I am often struck with the selfishness displayed by people who are
fortunate enough to be provided with umbrellas in time of sudden
showers. They calmly behold hosts of unhappy beings battling their way
through the storm, drenched to the bone, and with ruined garments, yet
never think of saying, "Accept a share of my umbrella," or "Walk with me
as far as our ways lie together." If I should hear such a speech I might
drop senseless with surprise, but all the same I should hail it as the
bugle note that heralded a new era of courteous kindness.
We are not put into the world to be suspicious of one another. We were
put here to make the world pleasanter for our tarrying, and to cultivate
a fellowship with souls. If the guests at a mountain inn, sojourning
together for a stormy night, spend the time in reviling one another, or
in calling attention to each other's blemishes, we write them down as
snobs; but what shall we call the tenants of transitory time who spend
the span of mortal life in doing all they can to make one another
uncomfortable? We have only a watch in the night to tarry together; let
us try to make that hour a profitable one and a pleasant memory for
others when we have journeyed on.
I have often wondered how Christian people got round the gospel command,
"Love thy neighbor as thyself." It doesn't say love him (or her) after a
proper introduction, or if agreeable, or congenial, or of good family
and established reputation--it simply gives the command on general
principles. I don't pretend to be good enough to obey the mandate
myself, for I honestly think it is a species of hypocrisy to say you
love everybody. One might as well say one were fond of all fruit alike,
whether specked, wormy or rotten. But let my good orthodox professor put
this in his pipe and smoke it. Let him remember it next time he sees his
neighbor plunged into an extremity, or handicapped by an annoyance of
any kind. If we love our neighbor we are bound to help him, and neighbor
in this sense means anyone who chances to be near us, whether black or
white, raggedly disreputable or sanctimoniously frilled.
There is more selfishness perpetrated in the world under guise of family
ties than in almost any other way. The man who does good and unselfish
deeds only for his own children and for the immediate circle housed
beneath his roof, forgetful of the claims of the great, tormented,
harassed and struggling world, is a selfish man and accountable to
heaven for a great deal of meanness. I don't care how much he puts on
his children's backs, or how many luxuries he surrounds them with, the
Lord will not hold him guiltless if he does nothing for the stranger who
tugs by him in the stress of life's uncertain weather, or for the
neighbor who sits disconsolate outside his gates.
I wish that vagabond and his dog who were brought before a west side
justice yesterday for vagrancy would travel up my way. I like that sort
of thing that leads a man to be faithful to his dog. It goes without
saying that the dog is faithful to the man, but it is not often that the
master shows the same spirit to the fond and steadfast brute. If the two
should journey my way I think they would have one white day in the
calendar. Good heavens, my dear, do you ever stop long enough in the
midst of your golf-playing and your tennis tournaments, your yachtings
and your outings to think what it is to be a tramp? To be unable to find
a stroke of work; to be sick and starved and homeless! Like "poor Joe,"
to be told to "move on" every time you stop to rest; to eat the
grudgingly given crust of charity, and have no friend under the sun,
moon or stars but a flea-bitten dog? Did you ever stop to think, my
Christian friend, that that tramp is a neighbor whom you are to love?
And if you are going to love him I will love his dog! No doubt the
latter is the better man of the two.
* * * * *
Did you ever read of a battle siege in olden times? There were the
full-armored warriors, resplendent in shining metal and plumed crests;
there were the mighty battering rams, and the flash of battle axes, the
thunder of advancing feet and the trumpet call before the gates. But
more potent than all else in the doomed city's destruction was the
secret work of the sappers and miners--the patient forces which wrought
their work out of sight and hearing. And I have been thinking to-night,
as I sit here, where the firelight weaves its delicate tapestry within
the beautiful walls of home, that it is not going to be the pompous ones
who shall march triumphant at last into the "City of Gold," but they who
have worked patiently and humbly out of sight and with no need of
praise. The man who has held to the dictates of his own conscience, not
conforming to the company he marched with; the man who has dared to be
himself in a world where men are labeled in lots; the man who has held
it high honor to suffer for a principle or to be loyal to an unpopular
friend or cause; the man who has erected a standard made up between his
own heart and heaven, and, independent of the world's verdict of praise
or blame, followed it to the end, is going to wear a crown by and by,
when the epauletted general and the pompous staff are forgotten. Prayer
is not always a genuflexion and an address. It is oftener hard work. The
farmer praying at his weeds, the pilot praying from every spoke of his
wheel, the mother whose daily life of unselfish toil and far-reaching
influence is a prayer, do more to stir the divine heart, to keep the
world's prow headed for heaven than half the solicitations or
apologetic addresses made in our churches under the name of prayer.
* * * * *
When you and I get rich, my dear, as some day we surely shall, what are
we going to do with all our money? We will hunt up some of the
improvident ones, those who could never make the two ends meet, those
who through good heartedness, or lack of forethought or unselfish desire
to make other folks happy, have never laid by a cent, and we will give
those silly people such a good time they will carry its impress all
through their after lives, as a pat of butter carries the print. We will
slyly pay the bills for improvident ones who have grown gray in the
effort to make a decent funeral for dead horses. They shall forget how
to spell "care" and their new and happy dialect shall know no such words
as "monthly payments," "righteous dues" or "can't afford it." I am
convinced that as a rule it is not the sweet-hearted people who take on
this world's gain. There is many a poor beggar with not a change of
linen to his back who would make a more royal host, had the smiling
face of fortune turned his way, than the rightful owner of the vast
estates at whose gate he stands and begs. The big hearts too often go
with the empty purse, and the little, wizened, skin-flint souls, that it
would take a thousand of to crowd the passage through the eye of a
needle, gain all the golden favors of the god of plenty.
* * * * *
After dinner I said to the little folks, "Behold, I will buy me a pair
of stockings and hire a bathing suit, and the afternoon shall be devoted
to frolic and thee." So we went to the small booth, where an exceedingly
meek young man sold ginger pop and fancy shells, and paralyzed him with
a demand for ladies' hose. He didn't know what we meant until I came out
boldly and unblushingly and asked for women's stockings. He said he
didn't keep 'em. "Have you a mother?" said I. "No." "Have you a sister?
Or is there a nearer one yet and a dearer, from whom I could buy or
borrow a pair of stockings that I may go in bathing?" He didn't
understand that either, but finally, with the aid of lucre, I made the
matter clear so that he got me a pair of canary-striped woolen hose,
evidently laid by for some farmer's winter use, and I bought them for a
sum that made his eyes grow dim with rapture. We went down to the beach,
and after a season of prayer with the young person to induce her to put
on some horrid tights, we all went in and enjoyed such a dip as only
salt water yields. In the midst of it we had to go on shore several
times to stand the boy on his head and pump the ocean out of him, as he
was constantly getting drowned in the surf, and one of my expensive and
expansive stockings was captured out at sea and brought back by a son of
Belial, who seemed greatly affected by its size, but in spite of such
small drawbacks we had a glorious time.
* * * * *
"What is the matter, my darling?" asked John, the newly married, to the
wife of his bosom.
"Nothing whatever," replied Mrs. John.
"But you look like a funeral," exclaimed he.
"I am not aware that I look more than usually unamiable; I certainly
never felt better," replied his wife, placidly folding down meanwhile
the hem to a distracting little apron she is making. John seizes his
hat, pushes it down over his eyes and rushes forth distracted with the
conjecture as to what terrible thing he has been guilty of to make his
wife look so like an injured martyr. For the time being love is dead,
joy wiped from the face of the earth, hope crucified and peace
assassinated, all because of bottled thunder. A word would have
explained all, a look has ruined everything.
"Don't put on your fresh muslin this afternoon," suggests the prudent
mother.
"But why not?" replied the sprightly Jane; "it is the only endurable
dress this warm weather."
"Oh, very well, do as you like, of course," meekly replied the parent in
a tone that suggests a serpent's fang, a hoary head and a broken heart
all in one.
Now, in my opinion it is not conducive to domestic harmony to have too
much of this sort of repression. It is like living in an exhaust
chamber. One would be certain to choke up and burst very soon.
Self-control does not consist in forever keeping one's mouth shut,
alone. A look, a sneer, a drooping mouth, a tilted nose, will do as much
mischief as a loosened tongue. Why I should go about like a disagreeable
old martyr or like a sneering Saul of Tarsus, and call myself pleasant
to live with, simply because I don't talk, is something not easily
understood.
I would far rather be a target for flying saucepans every time I popped
my head into the kitchen than have a cook there who never says a word,
but is sullen and ugly enough to carve me up like cold meat. I would
rather be a constant attendant at funerals, a nurse in a fever-ward, a
girl in a circus, or a street car horse, than live with proper folks who
never make blunders, or commit indiscretions either of speech or manner,
but look at you every time you sneeze as though your featherheadedness
was the only thing that made life unbearable. Out with it then if you
have cause for offense. Don't let the clouds hang a single hour, but
turn on the weather faucet and let it rain. If your neighbor has
insulted you, either ask her why or ignore it. Ten to one the fancied
insult is only a wind cloud, and sunshine will break it away. If you
feel mad sail right in for a tempest and have done with it. Thunder and
lighten, blow and hail if you want to, but don't be a non-committal
dog-day. Bottled thunder is a bad thing to keep on the family shelves.
It is likely to turn sour on your hands, and before you get through with
it, you will wish you had died young.
* * * * *
Yonder goes a small and worthless yellow dog. He is young; you can tell
that from the abnormal size of his paws, and a certain remnant of
wistful trust in human kind, which displays itself in the furtive wag of
his tail and the cock of his limp and discouraged ear. He is as
absolutely friendless as anything to which God has granted life can be.
Of his existence there is no thought in the mind of any man or woman
beneath the stars. The boys grow mindful of him now and then, though,
and their manifested interest has made of his life one terrible specter
of cringing fear. He hears the hurrah of their cruel chase in every tone
of sudden speech; he sees the menace of a blow in every shadow. Do you
know, my dear, that I never spoke a truer word in all my life than when
I say that underneath the hide of that forlorn and friendless little
yellow dog there is something more valuable than beats under the
broadcloth vests and silken waists of many of the men and women who pass
him by! A grateful heart mindful of the smallest kindnesses, a faithful
instinct which keeps dogs loyal even to cruel masters. I sometimes think
I would rather take my chances with honest dogs than with half the men
who own them. They may not be able to pass up the stamped ticket which
transfers the human passenger from the earthly to the celestial railroad
and carries him through on the passport of an immortal soul; but no
ticket at all is quite as good as a forged or fraudulent one, as some of
us will find out, I am thinking, when we hand up our worthless checks!
* * * * *
Which would you rather be in the orchestra of human life, a flute or a
trombone? To be sure, the latter is heard the farthest, but the quality
of the flute tone reaches deeper down into the soul and awakens there
dreams without which a man's life is like bread without leaven, or a
laid fire without tinder. I don't like noisy people, do you? People who
talk and bluster and swagger. People who remind us of bladders filled to
the point of explosion with wind. We like sensitive people,
quiet-voiced, deep-hearted, earnest people, with the quality of the
flute rather than that of the fog-horn in their make-up. And yet how
much greater demand there is for bluster than there is for force.
Sometimes I am inclined to think that life is a farce played with an
earthly setting for the delectation of the angels, as we serve minstrel
shows and burlesques. It isn't the shy and the timid who get the
applause; the clown in tinsel and the end man in cork divide easy
honors. And yet, thank God for flutes! Thank God the orchestra isn't
entirely composed of trombones and bass drums.
* * * * *